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Tim, I’ve got some bad news; I just got word from FOX News and apparently this column has a Wacky Silver Age Origin level of Severe, which means that there’s a severe risk of Wacky Silver Age Origins being discussed before the column is through. Are you prepared for that?

Could I ever truly be prepared for that? Can anyone? I don’t know, Mathan…I just don’t know.

However, I promise to do my due diligence and give it my all.


Links

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IP Culture is tantalizing to the tongue.

Our DC Forum is where Green Arrow continues to stoke the flames of controversy.

Tim, are you linking this week?

You know what? I am. I’m thinking this will blow your mind!


What I Read Last Week

Hellblazer #219 – Creepy issue. Mina really doing her thing with John. He’s alone, yet aware. This is turning out to be a very good read.

Nova #1 – I picked this up because the guy at my shop (and Ben Morse) recommended it. I may be in for the long haul.

JSA Classified #11 – Vandal Savage has never been this cool before. How did Alan damage his eye? This is one of my favorite OYL books.

Manhunter #21 – Nice to get a glimpse of what’s in our future. This was a great issue. It wasn’t action packed, but it was dense and full of detail. Amazing issue.

I second that emotion.

Ex Machina Special #1 – Dude, I’m really going to need more than two issues. Jack rocks! I want more Jack!

I second that emotion…umm…again.

Squadron Supreme #2 – Decent issue. I’m really missing Nighthawk, but I do like the new dynamic.

Don’t worry. Nighthawk will be back on the scene soon enough.

Justice #5 – I love how we’re still dangling about Aquaman’s status. I love how the Legion of Doom dismantled the JLA. I loved the scene with Sue and Ralph, and the scene with Ray and Jean. This is a damn fine book.


Both Scavenger and Kirk placed the lyric at the end of last week’s column so theyr’e guaranteed to have questions answered this week.

Scavenger rocks out with the best of them

You brought up Superboy and The Ravers as a footnote in history title. You also
mentioned Scare Tactics (Which was part of a de-Vertigozation of magic line DC tried with them, Book of Fate, Night Force, and one or two others).

It’s what that footnote means that is interesting. In that time period of the mid 90s DC had a number of books that came out that the online community absolutely loved, yet DC was quick to cancel. It was THE illustration of the difference between online fandom and mainstream.

Books like: Sboy & The Ravers, Scare Tactics, Priest’s Steel, Priest’s Xer0, Chase, Major Bummer, Young Heroes In Love. If the online community embraced it, DC axed it.

So for a question, what is DC’s greatest monster band up to during IC?

You do bring up interesting points about the mainstream vs net fans. I like to think of myself as straddling the two; I clearly have a presence on the net, but I’m not really passionate or as outspoken as many net fans are. But based on what I read, my tastes run more along the lines of the net fans.

As for Scare Tactics, I’m guessing that they’re trying to book gigs. I’m almost positive that they’re playing 1999 to diminished excitement considering it’s 2006. You’d kind of think that they’d have turned up in Day of Vengeance but I don’t recall seeing them. Perhaps they’ll turn up in the Shadow Pact; I get the vibe that Detective Chimp might dig their sound.

Tim, do you think Scare Tactics will mount a comeback?

I don’t know. On the one hand, mid to late nineties nostalgia should be a force soon, if past history is any indication. So Scare Tactics could hitch their wagon to that movement.

On the other hand, this is Scare Tactics we are talking about. So…probably not. Even if Scare Tactics did have such excellent covers as this one:


Scare Tactics’ music was so-so, but their use of crayons in art…inspired!


Whatever happened to Kirk M. ?

I recently purchased the DC Universe Stories of Alan Moore and read “Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow”. GREAT story, but there were two heroes that I just didn’t recognize at all.

One was identified as Superwoman. I was thinking that it might be Kara grown up, but the book makes it sound like these events happened post-Crisis, after Kara was dead. Plus, Superwoman was masked, had red hair and was wearing blue on red as opposed to Superman’s red on blue.

The other guy I have NO clue about. All I know was that he was wearing a nasty brown vest/yellow hot pants combo, had a beard, held the dead Lana Lang in his arms and cried and was apparently enough of a major player to help the major DC characters try to break down the forcefield that was around the Fortress of Solitude. Yet I have NO clue who he is. Any ideas?

I really consider myself lucky to have experienced the pre Crisis DCU, because in times like this it really comes in handy. I have sort of fuzzy memories involving a continuity where the “S” shield was kind of common and adorned every other character in the DCU. A continuity where being a Kryptonian wasn’t really anything special.

The Superwoman in question is none other than Kristin Wells. Before we get into her backstory, I’m going to get into the origin of the character. Y’see Kristen Wells, like kryptonite before her and Renee Montoya and Harley Quinn after, began in another medium. (What about Lockdown? DON’T FORGET LOCKDOWN!) She first appeared in Elliot S! Maggin’s novel Miracle Monday. She was later incorporated into the DC Multiverse proper.

Kristin Wells was born in the 29th Century, and her bloodline can be traced back to Jimmy Olsen (hence the red hair.) In college working on her thesis, she used time travel to investigate the past.

However after college, Kristin was hounded by the one lasting mystery of the 20th Century; the identity of Superwoman. Y’see every other hero’s identity had been exposed by the time the 29th Century rolled around. So Kristin managed to finagle a trip back to the past (to the day Superwoman debuted) in order to ascertain her identity.

Once there Kristin deduced that she was destined to be Superwoman. Using some of her nifty 29th Century tech she used her “powers” to aid Superman and save the day. Afterward she went back to her time and revealed the identity of Superwoman, because she was just that classy of an act.

End of story, right? Wrong! Superwoman had a presence in the 20th Century, which meant that Kristin had to make regular trips in between our present and hers. One of those resulted in her getting stuck in past with amnesia.

She had a cameo in the Planet Krypton one-shot, but so did many Pre Crisis characters.

That other “major player” was none other than Vartox. Vartox was from, let me get this just right “Valeron, in the Sombrero Galaxy, 7½ million light years from Earth.” The “Sombrero Galaxy?” Really? Even I find that hard to believe. I hope that’s just wacky Silver Age writers with writer’s block rather than a lazy astronomer.

Given that it’s time for a…

WACKY SILVER AGE ALERT!!!

Anyway Vartox was a hero on his planet and fell in love with some woman named Syreena. Unfortunately she turned out to be a criminal, and he had to imprison her. (Honestly, who hasn’t been there?) Later in life he married Elyra.

Once again, unfortunately for Vartox Elyra had a bionic twin on Earth. “What’s wrong with a bionic twin” you ask? Well for one thing when your bionic twin dies, you die as well. Elyra’s bionic twin was shot and killed in Metropolis, which resulted in Elyra’s death. (Again, who hasn’t had this problem? Am I right, people?)

Now the killer, a Frank Sykes, went to prison for the murder of the bionic twin. But he was also responsible for the death of Elyra, which he wasn’t being punished for. That last part really ticked Vartox off. So after using the Time Telescope (which he boosted using his hyper vision) he found out that Sykes was the guy who killed his wife.

This next part is tricky, so I’m going to directly quote his profile in Who’s Who “he then mentally projected what would happen if he went to Earth and took Sykes from prison.” He saw that he end up tussling with Superman and Lois Lane would die as a result.

(Can I just say that I think it’s cool that he could not only see the consequences of his potential actions, but the consequences of those original consequences?)

Anyway Vartox realized that revenge is a dish best served cold; he waited for Sykes to get paroled, took him to Valeron and got justice. How’d he manage that? Well he aged Sykes 60 years in a matter of minutes. So even though Sykes wasn’t convicted of killing Elyra, he still got 60 years of life sapped from him.

(I’ve got to believe that if Syke’s had legal representation on Valeron, he might have actually gotten off. I mean, would any jury, even a jury on Valeron buy a notion as far fetched as “bionic twins”? Plus once you introduce both the Six Million Dollar Man and the Bionic Woman into evidence, the case against Syke looks paper-thin. Although I’m not really factoring in Vartox’s Time Telescope or his hyper vision.

The more I think about it Tim, we should probably pitch DC a 12 issue maxi series titled; The Trial of Frank Sykes: Justice Valeron Style. Please tell me you’re down for this Tim.) (Down for it? Heck, I’ve already got it plotted through issue #8 and the first three issues thumbnail sketched out.)

Where was I, oh that’s right back on Valeron. Well Valeron exploded. Vartox survived and Superman hooked him up with an identity (Supes, aiding an illegal immigrant? That’s not very “Truth, Justice and American Way” of you Kal, especially not in the current political climate) and security gig at Galaxy Communications. His new name; Vernon O’Valeron. It was at this time that Vartox became enamored with Lana Lang.

Vartox grew tired of his new life and left to find a planet of his own to protect. He did, but then the Crisis happened.

It would be remiss if I didn’t mention his powers. Again I’m going to have to quote so that you’ll believe me; “Vartox’s hyper powers are of psychic origin and he has displayed new ones every time he has appeared. He has great strength and speed, flying power, near invulnerability, hyper sense, various psychic abilities, the power to change his appearance at will; he can pass though solid walls and project various kinds of energy to do an array of things. There is simply not room here to list the powers he has displayed so far.

Doesn’t this sound like the coolest guy?

He sure does, Mathan.

Now look at him


It, perhaps, goes without saying that said betrayal involved Vartox’s vest.

And if you think that’s bad, he was inspired by Sean Connery


“In this outfit, I’m the man now, dog.

(I fail to see how basing anyone or anything on Connery equals bad, especially when we are talking about Connery in the fetching outfit.)

I honestly don’t know how I’m going to get to sleep tonight.

For some reason there’s actually a post Crisis version of the character out there. *Shudder*

Tim, if there was ever anyone that’s ever asked for a Revamping® it’s Vartox, isn’t it?

How, exactly, does one improve on perfection though, Mathan?


Writer/Artists, meet your new enemy, Kirk M.

I noticed that John Byrne and Dan Jurgens are both getting a lot of high profile work as of late (Byrne on Atom, Jurgens on Bludhaven) and kind of found myself wondering whatever happened to the writer/artists? Even after both Byrne and Jurgens writing went to crap, they’ve been able to keep paycheques coming, got some vanity type projects (Doom Patrol/Teen Titans) and don’t get as reviled as, let’s say, Chris Claremont when they write something that’s not up to past standards. Where are the writer/artists today?

I think that one reason that writer/artists aren’t attacked by fans as much as writers are is because they’ve got the art to fall back on. Fans can always say “well at least (fill in the blank) isn’t writing the book too.”

Writer/artists are still around. And some are even working for DC. Look no further than two highly touted OYL books; Green Lantern Corps and The Shadowpact.

The Shadowpact is written and features the art of Bill Willingham. Some of my favorite of Willingham’s (who resides in Vegas, though I’ve yet to encounter him) art coincidentally enough was in The Green Lantern Corps #218, a killer Sinestro issue. He’s since gone on to great acclaim as the creator of Fables.

Green Lantern Corps is written by Dave Gibbons, who’s sharing the art chores with Patrick Gleason. Again, I first encountered Gibbons art on the pages of Green Lantern, #181 to be exact. Obviously he’s most well known for his work on The Watchmen.

Jimmy Palmiotti, writes plenty of books with his partner Justin Gray. Palimotti also inks many books. Keith Giffen is providing layouts for 52, yet he’s also writing Blue Beetle. Hawkgirl has two writer/artists, Walt Simonson and Howard Chaykin. Alex Ross is working on both sides of Justice.

And I’m pretty sure that Darwyn Cooke’s take on The Spirit is still supposed to come out at some point. I’m sure it’ll be as great at his New Frontier.

So as you can see writer/artists are still around, but they aren’t always doing both on the same title.

Tim, do you prefer collaboration or a singular vision when it comes to comic books?

Well, before I get into all that, allow me to address a current pet peeve of mine that John unwittingly stumbled on.

How, exactly, is Jurgens’ Titans book a vanity project? Just because something is bad, does not, in and of itself, make it a vanity project, but I have often seen, as of late, people refer to something as being a vanity project when what they really mean is “a creator’s project that I did not enjoy.”

A vanity project is marked by, well, vanity. It is usually an act of hubris marked by arrogance and, in the context of comics, a refusal to acknowledge the works of others. I would grant that Byrne’s Doom Patrol fits that parameter (although, for all we know, DC requested a Doom Patrol that ignored past continuity). But I’d also include works that turned out well, like the ABC line of comics. Or, beyond the world of comics, basically any of Orson Welles films where he directed and starred would fit the bill. Essentially, vanity does not have to mean “bad.” And similarly “bad” does not mean vanity.

For me, it is like the use of “Mary Sue” that dripped the message boards for awhile. For those that don’t know, a Mary Sue is a fan fiction character that is really, essentially, a stand-in for the writer, an excuse to insert themselves into the stories of their favorite heroes, villains, TV shows, movies, or musical icons. Every new character that was not enjoyed got struck with this label even though it rarely made sense. The closest to a true Mary Sue in recent times would probably be Jessica Jones (admitted by Bendis himself), but Alias was so good, it transcended that label. On the other hand, Devin Grayson was accused of creating the female Tarantula as a Mary Sue. That could be true…if Grayson sees (or imagines) herself as a violent borderline sociopath and rapist. Which seems doubtful to me. Heck, even Jason Todd was labeled as a “Mary Sue” in a review I read of one of the issues from Winick’s Batman run.

Long story short, use the terminology only if it fits. Jurgens pitching and then writing an all-new group of Titans plus a young Atom because DC asked him to is not an act of ego. It’s called “collecting a paycheck.” Or, “sucking” if you prefer.

Whew, let me just push my soapbox back under the table.

Okay, back to the real question. I don’t think either is necessarily better than the other. Byrne’s run on Superman as a writer/artist was excellent, Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns is arguably one of the five best comic stories ever, and Simonson’s run on Thor is the pinnacle for that character (to choose three random choices of goodness). On other hand, we have Byrne on Doom Patrol, Miller on the Dark Knight Strikes Back and so on. So, singularity of vision is not always good.

Then, on the collaborative side, you have people like James Robinson, Stan Lee, Alan Moore, or Grant Morrison who are geniuses of the industry but have rarely, if ever, drawn their own scripts.

So, I guess the answer is: I like ’em both.


Tim Stevens is a classy gentlemen who makes the world brighter just by being in it. This question is a fine example of that classiness.

I will not rest until I discover who that villain in yellow and red is.

As much as I want to string you further along, I’ll finally give you an in depth answer to your question. Meet Simon Ecks. Simon is research scientist. Like most research scientists Simon is lonely and introverted. However unlike most research scientists, Simon’s actually paid off. His experiments proved that the auras that surround people could be enhanced, given physicality and powers. Furthermore he found that they could operate independently of their body of origin.

Not being particularly patient Simon used his device on himself and made his own energy duplicate, which he dubbed “Double X.” However the meek Simon’s fragile mind cracked as a result and was dominated by the duplicate. A crime spree ensued.

Since he operated in Gotham he was bested by Batman and sent to Arkham. Simon got out and again unleashed Double X. This second time Batman beat him by using the machine to unleash Double Batman. After the inevitable defeat, Batman destroyed the machine and sent Simon to Arkham.


Please note the eeeeeeeeevil mustache.

However by this point Double X was residing inside of Simon waiting to be released. Simon figured this out, stuck his finger in socket and sprang Double X. Again he was defeated.

The last time anyone saw him he had teamed up with the Rainbow Raider to battle Bats and the Flash. Hmm, Rainbow Raider & Doctor Double X vs Batman & The Flash, who proves victorious?

Double X’s nifty powers include sharing Simon’s consciousness yet being independent, flying and firing energy blasts. But he also happens to need electricity to remain outside of Simon.

Tim, was Doctor Double X everything you dreamed he’d be?

Everything and more, Mathan, everything and more.


Steve would be cooler if he spelled his name “Stevee” (the extra “e” is for “excellent”)

My past questions seemed to agitate you (something about Battlesuit Lex). This time I went out to research Superboy Prime on my own, and found my answer. Yay me. Unfortunately, I came across something I couldn’t get an answer for, so I’m back. Superboy Prime is the only hero of Earth Prime, but they mention another Earth Prime hero who immigrated to the Earth-1 DCU. His name is Ultraa. Double the A’s must mean double the goodness, but I’ve never heard of him. Can you enlighten me?

In all fairness, Battlesuit Lex agitates a lot of people, not just me.

However I’d be happy to address Ultraa. And of course by “happy” I mean I’m going to pawn this off on Mathan from the past, because he said something so amazingly eloquent that I’d never be able to match it.

Well my counterpart has left his reference material lying around so this should be pretty straightforward to answer. Let’s see. Tobias Whale, T.O. Morrow, Turtle Man, Ultraa. Here we go.

I guess a long time ago a star exploded. One of the planets that orbited the star built a sort of space ark, for just an event. So a third of the population got on the ark and went into suspended animation, while the ark’s computer captain Maxitron looked for some new digs.

Well things happened as they often do, a meteor storm damaged the ship and altered the course directing it toward the sun. Even though Maxitron could pilot the ship for however many light years without help, it only managed to shoot out one of its passengers before the sun incinerated the ship. That kid was raised by Australian aborigines (as opposed to the Icelandic variety.)

Of course since he was the sole survivor of his planet he had all sorts of powers on Earth. Plus he still had the knowledge of his race, which was developed enough to build that great space ark. Fortunately he landed on Earth Prime, which had no other super heroes Unfortunately the Justice League was passing through when he began his heroing gig.
Somehow the Justice League found out they would be trapped on that Earth (instead of Earth One) as long Ultraa was there. Then some criminal found a piece of Maxitron and became Earth Prime’s first super villain. Oy vey.

So the heroes teamed up and defeated the villain, Green Lantern erased any memory of heroes or villain from the populaces memory and Ultraa went with his new friends to Earth One. But then he got the notion to rid Earth One of super heroes too. So he used his races super science to make a machine that would stop the heroes from using their powers. But the side effect was that the villains got more powerful. Science, when will they learn?

Now here is where the story gets kooky. But you’re saying, “Parallel Earth Mathan things sound pretty kooky already.” Well hold on to your hats because the Justice League put Ultraa in a stasis cube, because that is what you do to people you can’t trust. Well a lawyer freed him, and the Justice League went to court to face charges of wrongful imprisonment. But it turns out that the lawyer was really a group of aliens that wanted to steal the hydrogen from Earth’s water. Not from the atmosphere where it is pretty abundant, but from the water! The Justice League and Ultraa foiled their plot.
Ultraa then became Jack Grey, Atlantic City busboy. Of course he was conned into helping a criminal commit some crimes. When the Justice League intervened, they just sent Ultraa to live with the aborigines. I’m sorry, the Australian aborigines.

But then when the Crisis happened everything started over again. This time around Maxitron didn’t save anyone. They all perished in the sun. And I think we’re all the better for it. (The best part of this clearly meticulously researched and written explanation? It means NOTHING post-Crisis! That was all wiped out by the Crisis and now Ultraa is just some goofy alien who used to stalk Maxima! Hahaha! Take that Evil Mathan! Good DOES always triumph over e-mail! Bookmark this column as a valuable life lesson kids -Ben)

Tim, are you amazed by the plight of poor Ultraa or bored by it?

I think “horrified” would be a better way to describe it, actually.


Even in Spanish, Alphaa means “ass kicker”


Neil must have Harrison Ford (or is Alec Baldwin or *shudder* Ben Affleck) on the brain

In it, Creeper is assumed dead, but Jack Ryan has been kicking around the DCU for years, none the worse for the wear and is due to get his own mini post-Infinite Crisis.

I’m thinking it had to do with the Creeper’s rapid ability to heal and a little misdirection. Or a Zero Hour retcon. But is there a story behind the Creeper’s “resurrection”?

Neil, since you choose to tease me about the second Wildcat’s family tree, I’m going to chide you; I didn’t know what The Creeper has to do with Tom Clancy novels.

But The Creeper’s return is a funny story. However, I don’t want to hog all of the spotlight, so I’m going to turn the column over to Mathan from the past.

From the 3/30/05 column
The Creeper did show up recently during Chuck Austen’s run over in Action Comics. Jack Ryder was slumming at the Daily Planet and was given Clark Kent’s gig as a way to increase readership. Jack was so driven to get a story that he ordered a cameraman into the thick of a superhero skirmish in order to get a scoop. The cameraman was killed.

The Creeper showed up a couple times, but didn’t fare too well against his foe.

I’m sure that many of you are curious why The Creeper is still around, especially since he was killed in Eclipso #13. Yes The Creeper was torn to shred by “eclipsed” coyotes. His remains were found by natives, who buried them. End of the story right? Nope.

Y’see one of the nifty aspects of The Creeper was his “healing factor.” The guy could heal pretty quickly. The Creeper’s remaining body parts managed to reconnect and begin healing. As soon as he was mostly together again, The Creeper changed back into Jack Ryder. Fortunately he was alive. Unfortunately he was still buried.

Jack dug himself out of his grave. Ryder was understandably shaken. He roamed around Parador dazed. His mind was shattered. He was found, returned to the United States and institutionalized. I highly recommend reading The Creeper series. It was yet another great book that was canceled too soon. (Issue #4 deals with how The Creeper survived Eclipso.)

And that’s the story of The Creeper coming back to life.


You just can’t keep a good Creeper down.

I’m looking forward to the upcoming mini. I really dig Justiniano’s art. I’m intrigued by the tweaking of the origin.

Tim, are you going to give the mini a chance?

At this time I am leading towards no, but that could change. I’ll need to be really impressed with his appearance in Brave New World and/or have one of the titles I currently read really tank in appeal to affect that change, but it is still a possibility.


Neil sees dead characters

And was that the last we saw of all the heroes who died? I know it was the last of Yolanda Montez and Beth Chapel. But I thought I heard of Mark Shaw appearing post Eclipso and maybe the Peacekeeper as well.

Wait a minute? When you ask about Mark Shaw, are you saying that you don’t read the official Comic Book of Comic Nexus: Manhunter? How can you not be reading that title? I purchased every copy of the first OYL issue that was on the racks at my comic shop and had the owner give them to people who don’t read the title. It’s that good!

But yeah, as revealed in Manhunter, the Manhunter who went to Parador wasn’t Mark Shaw but some nameless government agent.

There was a new Major Victory, who turned up in the premiere issue of Battle For Bludhaven. But the original is still dead.

Likewise, there is a new Peacekeeper, but once again I’ll let Mathan from the past fill you in on him (this will also feature a flashback within a flashback type event.)

From the 10/27/04 column
Way back in the 7/18/03 column I wrote;
One Peacemaker popped up in JLI #65 as part of the Leaguebusters. Peacemaker III is a former doctor named Mitchell Black who got finagled into taking the Peacemaker mantle he now wishes he could relinquish.

Wow, apparently I was going for brevity. Well here’s a longer answer.

Christopher had two loving parents, Wolfgang Schmidt, an Austrian munitions manufacturer and Elizabeth Lewis an American author. When Chris was five, Wolfgang was exposed as a Nazi war criminal. His pop wasn’t too keen on the whole “public trial” thing so he killed himself, in front of his five year old son!

Elizabeth moved back to the United States, changed Chris’ name to “Smith” and tried to lead a normal life. But witnessing his father’s suicide left Chris understandably traumatized. So much so that his father would appear to him dressed in a full black Nazi SS uniform and push him to live up the Nazi legacy.

It was Wolfgang who, years later, told Chris to massacre a village in Vietnam. This lead to Chris being sentenced to 20 years in prison. But those cool Government folks gave Chris a chance. He would be let out early if he became a subject in “Project: Peacemaker.” It was some anti terrorism campaign, back before it was the trendy thing to do.

His pop pushed him to excel in the program. But the program ran out of money before he had finished his training. His mom had died years earlier, so he was kind of lost. He went back to Austria where he converted his pop’s munitions business into a household wares dynasty, all because he was tired of military. He then used his family fortune to found the Pax Institute, and even made his own Project: Peacemaker.

His pop urged him to fight for peace. His goal was to wipe out those who stood in the way of peace. His campaign came to the attention of the US government, more specifically Valentina Vostok, the former Negative Woman. She reined him in and he began working with The Agency and later Checkmate.

He, like every other hero in Parador, died in Eclipso #13. But since he was crazy, he was happy to die.

Like I said earlier the second Peacemaker showed up on JLE #65.

The current Peacemaker is Mitchell Black. He’s just your average guy. Mitchell was a doctor. That was until he decided to perform a risky operation on a child, against the kid’s parent’s wishes. Needless to say the operation wasn’t successful. The kid died, Black lost his license.

The Pax Institute swept him up for Project Peacemaker. He’s the Peacemaker at the moment and doesn’t really dig the gig. If you really want to read about the guy read the L.A.W. miniseries.

Tim, can you think of any reason for any other resurrections from the Parador Posse?

No, I cannot. Not any good ones (beyond, perhaps, reversing some of the “Women in Refrigerators” phenomenon) anyway. I think it has been too long since it all went down to turn back the clock on the remaining deaths (especially considering what has been based on or enabled to happen by that event since). Besides, death has been so devalued in comics already that we don’t need another resurrection making things worse. Unless that resurrection is Aztek’s.


Neil plays games

Here’s a question I hope you can answer, Mathan. It’s been driving me mad for a while…the new Heroclix ad, the one for the “DC Heroclix Collateral Damage” line, which started appearing in the comics a few months back…I can identify all but one of the characters.

Starting at the top we have:
 “Electric” Superman Red
 Owlman (Morrison JLA: Earth Two version)
 an OMAC
 Doctor Mid-nite (Pieter Cross)
 Captain Cold
 ? (some kind of monkey creature with a blue jacket and he’s holding a metal shaped thing with a red orb on top)
 Manhunter (Kate Spencer)
 Speedy (Mia Darrow)
 Captain Boomerang (Owen Mercer)
 Clayface (?)
 Kaliback
 Azrael
 Ragman
 Metamorpho
 Kyle Rayner (Jim Lee costume)
So who is the one that I missed?

You mean this one?

Oh that’s Jack Ryan and Peacekeeper.

I’m kidding.

Snap, Neil! You just got schooled!

It’s actually Monsieur Mallah and the Brain. Y’know those Brotherhood of Evil baddies who also happened to be in love with each other?

Tim, do you prefer Ape/organ action or Monkey/organ action?

Well, monkey/organ action has a proud circus and street fair tradition, but apes are largely and thus, usually, funnier. So, I guess I’d choose…wait…is this a sex joke?


Admiral Snackbar misses the citizens of Metropolis

One of the best aspects of Superman, in my mind, is his supporting cast. I’m talking about everyone, not just Ma, Pa, Lois, Perry, and Jimmy. To be fair, in the late 90s, the Superman comics focused on them WAY too much. My question now is, what the heck happened to all of them?

Dan Turpin hasn’t been seen since Lupé took over the SCU. Maggie Sawyer moved to Gotham, but do the Batman books even use her? Ron Troupe actually manages to show up every now and then, but that’s mainly because he married Lois’ sister. What about Dirk Armstrong, and his blind daughter? Or the entire staff of the Cadmus project? What happened to them? Cat Grant worked for Lex when he was President, so I assume she’s out of a job now. Did Gangbuster ever come back? Or the Alpha Centurion? Or Kitty Faulkner, aka Rampage? Speaking of the Cadmus Project, what happened to the Guardian? And is there any relation to the Seven Soldier’s Manhattan Guardian?

I’m really touched that you care about these characters. Myself, I could care less, unless someone was picking them off one by one in an effort to get to Superman.


Dan Turpin – He’s still a cop, but he did indeed get pushed to side in favor of Lupe, who has similarly taken a backseat. I could see Lupe getting killed and Dan getting a promotion.


Maggie Sawyer – She was a major player in Gotham Central, which was one of the most underrated books when it was out.


Ron Troupe – He’s still around, but given that he’s married to Lucy and she makes rare appearances, Ron’s been banished to limbo as well. (He’s the not Jimmy Olsen guy in the photo above…I think.)


Dirk Armstrong – This guy was modeled on Rush Limbaugh, which might account for his disappearance.


Cadmus Project – When Lex was Prez, Cadmus vanished into limbo.


Cat Grant – Given how badly Lex’s term ended, can you blame her for wanting to stay of the spotlight for a minute?


Gangbuster – Was last seen as a sub teaching in Fawcett City.


Alpha Centurion – He got dissed by Lex and fled to Washington DC. (That’s ironic considering where Lex eventually ended up for awhile.) I think he could probably make a comeback, but that’s mostly because I dig him.


Kitty FaulknerShe was once pretty prominent and now I’m pretty sure that the last time we saw her was in Adventures of Superman #587. Satanus had actually split Rampage from Kitty Faulkner. But they were reunited and it feels so good.


The Guardian – He disappeared along with the rest of the Cadmus folk. However since the Manhattan Guardian is in the DCU, I’m guessing there’s a link.

Now clearly we can see why many of these characters went away. For some (Rampage, Alpha Centurion, Gangbuster) they were redundant or outgrew the books. For others (Maggie Saywer, Cadmus, The Guardian) they went to other books and gained more depth. Others (Cat Grant, Dirk Armstong, Ron Troupe) just had a short shelf life and changes in status quo affected the need for their presence. Regardless, there were far too many supporting characters in those books.

Tim, how do you like your Super Supporing Cast; sprawling or sparse?

Isn’t there an in between choice?

If I really only have those two to choose from, I guess I’d go with sparse with the added caveat of “but highly developed”. I like the idea of a sprawling supporting cast, but often, in practice, that beautiful idea fall prey to two different realities. One, as the right honorable Snackbar mentioned, is that the hero gets pushed out of the spotlight by his or her supporting cast. The other is that all the supporting players end up so barely sketched you question why anyone would bother writing all of them in the first place.


Admiral Snackbar also liked those fine folks from Hawaii

While I’m on the subject, there’s Superboy’s supporting cast. I know Tana Moon died, but what happened to Rex and Roxy Leech? Or Dubbilex? Or the ‘real’ (as in the non-superpowered) Krypto?

Rex and Roxy are still out there somewhere. I’m pretty sure Roxy showed up in an issue of Power Company, but she’s hardly been heard from since she was possessed by Pyra.

I’m pretty sure that Krypto is still hanging out with Hillary Chang.

Dubbilex was actually last seen in Superboy #100. He went off to the Himalayas to just chill out. But since I’m guessing Superboy is going to have a funeral, there’s a chance we’ll see some of these folks there.

Tim, do you care about any of these characters?

Honestly…no. I’m sorry.


Admiral Snackbar is in a question asking groove.

Most important of all… has anyone seen Bibbo?! (Spoiler alert: I hear that Jack Larson (who played Jimmy Olsen in the 50’s) has a cameo in Superman Returns as Bibbo… do you think that means he’ll return in the comics in at least a small capacity?

We can only hope not. Um, I mean, sure he might appear. I just don’t think that the writers are really worried about Bibbo’s making a comeback. I think they’re more focused on making Superman readable. If they can make Bibbo work, cool, but I don’t think that the editors have given the writers any sort of Bibbo mandate.

It should probably be noted that there’s going to be some bad business going down in Metropolis, with the Society and whatnot. So there’s a chance that Bibbo could die a horrible and graphic death. But it’s not like I’m hoping that happens. Really.

Tim are you excited about Superman Returns?

Damn straight I am! One my favorite directors (Singer), two of my favorite actors (Spacey and Posey), and comics on the big screen spells one happy Tim Stevens.


Sadly the column is over. Next week will see this millenniums greatest creations as well as the answer to your question, possibly, provided you send me one. You can email it to me or you can post it on Our Very Own Neato-Terrific Thread!

But before I go here’s my question to you; Which character is lamer; Vartox or Ultraa?

“Whether it’s two weeks, two years or just tonight.”