We’re in London, England
You’re hosts are Tazz and Cole
WWE United States Championship
(C) JBL Vs William Regal
JBL starts out by coming out in the Rolls Royce which he does EVERY time they come to the UK including when I went to Smackdown. JBL gets booed just for even MENTIONING the name of his title. He goes on about how the UK relies on America and mentions WWII because he generally is out of ideas to get heat. My God what the hell has happened to JBL? When the hell did he lose his mic skills and have to rely on cheap heat. Fans chant “England” to drown him out. JBL starts “USA” so fans chant “sucks” after it to show they’re one step ahead of him. Regal finally interrupts and snatches the mic from JBL. He calls Tony Blair a Muppet which gets a big pop. He then calls American’s a bunch of “worthless, useless, cowardly, pathetic, toss pots” at which point he throws a left hand and the match is on. Regal punts JBL’s hat out of the ring and chokes him with his American flag jacket. Regal rearranges JBL’s face and then fires off some forearms for a two count. Regal does some choking lands some more right hands as fans chant “let’s go Regal”. JBL gets knocked outside as we go to a commercial
Commercial
We’re back with Regal still handing it to JBL and stomping away in the corner. JBL gets a big boot to counter his dominance though and that makes Regal bleed hard way from the ear. JBL pounds away at the ear with right hands in the corner and clubs the back. Regal fires off some forearms but JBL goes to a sleeper hold. Regal suplexes out of that but JBL shoulder blocks him down and boots him in the face to stop a comeback. JBL pulls at the ear and gets a swinging neck breaker. Sloppy DDT gets two for JBL. Regal stumbles back to his feet and catches JBL with an Exploder Suplex out of nowhere for two. Regal gets the running high knee to the temple but JBL is in the ropes. Regal locks in the Regal Stretch but JBL makes the ropes just barely. JBL thumps Regal in the eye and gets a major ugly looking lariat for the win.
WINNER – JBL
*1/2 – Match was okay from Regal’s end of things but JBL really dragged it down as he has been doing in pretty much every match he’s been in now since Wrestlemania.
Kristal is with Booker T and Sharmel. She asks him to predict who will win the main event tonight. Booker T says he doesn’t care and he will be KOTR. Gunner Scott interrupts and reintroduces himself. Booker gets all pissed off but backs down saying he has a chest cold. Booker says he will find someone to fight him tonight and then has a coughing fit.
A promo video is shown about Native Americans. It ends up being a video for Tatanka. Man they are still set on pushing him?
MNM w/ Melina and Gregory Helms Vs London, Spanky and Super Crazy
Man this should be awesome if there’s any justice in this world. London and Spanky dive out onto MNM and Crazy dives out onto Helms to get things started. Melina interferes by crotching Spanky. Man the heat segment less than a minute in? that’s not a good sign. Mercury goes to the bear hug and Demolition Decapitation follows that but London breaks the cover up at two. Helms goes to an abdominal stretch but Spanky arm drags out and tags in London. London gets a double dropsault on MNM and a spin kick on Helms for two. Everyone ends up on the outside and London inside cradles Helms for the win in the ring.
WINNERS – LONDON, SPANKY AND SUPER CRAZY
** – You’re kidding me they couldn’t have given that 10 more minutes?
After the match MNM are on the end of a dressing down from Melina. She storms off and makes fun of Jillian Hall for getting fired. They start covering each other in makeup and the foreign legion has to split them up. Now THAT’S a catfight.
Lashley cuts a “I’m a quiet yet loveable monster” promo ahead of the following match
KOTR Opening Round Match
Lashley Vs Mark Henry
Let’s see what these two can do. If they’re smart they’ll keep the wrestling minimal and do a 5 minute power match because that’s pretty much all Henry can do without boring the crap out of me and Lashley is far too inexperienced to carry him. If Kurt Angle can’t do it then it’s pretty much impossible. Lock up and Henry shoves Lashley down. Lashley goes for a top wristlock but gets shoved off again. Henry talks some smack and Lashley just gives a cold and scary look. Lashley tees off with some right hands but gets clubbed down by Henry. Henry gets a big head butt and sends Lashley into the corner but Lashley comes storming out with a big clothesline. Lashley gains some momentum but runs into a clothesline from Henry for two. Henry pounds away some more with his boring offence. Front rib breaker gets two for Henry as the match continues to slowly chug along. Lashley comes back with some clotheslines and finally knocks Henry down. Lashley gets a big body slam and tries the Dominator but Henry back drops out of it. Henry misses a body block and tumbles outside for the count out.
WINNER – LASHLEY
¼* – Well that was a lame ending. Henry attacks Lashley post match to get his heat back. Why the f*ck are they protecting MARK HENRY from doing clean jobs to Bobby Lashley? Lashley should have eaten Henry up and spat him out.
Kristal is with Rey Mysterio and asks him if he thinks he’ll lose tonight. He says he doesn’t know but he’s living his dream and he has a lot of respect for Angle. He says he wants to avoid the ankle lock because when it’s on it’s over.
Booker T and Sharmel come out to name Gunner Scott’s opponent
Gunner Scott Vs Finlay
Hell even I called that one in advance. Why not make it Nunzio so we can all have a good laugh? Finlay goes to the side headlock to start and kicks Gunner in the face. Finlay gets a European Uppercut but Scott comes back with a dropkick but gets caught in the apron on the baseball slide. I wonder when the Benoit run in will happen. Finlay nearly takes Scott’s head off but jumps into a boot. Scott gets a running forearm but runs into a boot to the gut. Scott gets an overhead belly to belly suplex for two. Finlay gets the stick thing but gets back dropped. Booker sneaks in with a cheap shot and Finlay finishes it in the ring.
WINNER – FINLAY
½* – I was hoping for a technical mat match but that didn’t happen. Benoit predictably makes the save.
Kristal has interview time with The Great Khali. Daivari says that Khali has taken the Undertaker out. Seriously, all the guy did was hit him a few times you couldn’t keep Funaki out for more than three weeks with that sort of attack. Daivari says Taker is afraid and Khali does some more of his winning Giant Gonzalez impersonation. Fans chant “What!” after his incomprehensible rambling.
World Heavyweight Championship
(C) Rey Mysterio Vs Kurt Angle
The UK as always been a stronghold for Mysterio. I don’t know why but the fans just love him. That’s probably because the audience is more based around kids here so Rey is thus more marketable and popular. I must admit seeing Rey live was pretty cool back in 2004 even if they jobbed him to Carlito. Angle gets a takedown to start and works the ankle. Rey gets an arm drag but runs into a forearm. Rey gets the 10 punch in the corner and you can here some slight boos which could be Eddie backlash. Angle gets a tilt a whirl back breaker and then just a plain old back breaker for two. Angle throws Rey outside as we go to a commercial
Commercial
We’re back with Angle having Rey in a rear naked choke. Rey fights up to a vertical base but takes a knee to the gut for two. Angle gets a body slam and goes for the Angle Slam but Rey counters to the sunset flip but Angle counters that to an ankle lock but Rey flips out of that and gets a dropkick to the face. Awesome little segment there. Rey gets a big head scissors and sets up the 619 but Angle gets an elbow to stop that. Angle runs into a boot and Rey gets a bulldog for two. Angle gets the overhead belly to belly and preps for the Angle Slam but Rey turns that into a DDT for two. Rey heads up top but Angle gets the pop up suplex for two. Angle gets some shoulder thrusts in the corner but misses a charge and his shoulder hits the steel. Rey drops the dime on the back of Angle’s head and that only manages a two. Fans chant for Angle now as Rey goes for another bulldog but Angle gets a big German Suplex for two. Angle pulls down the straps and goes for the Angle Slam but Rey counters with the 619 but Angle swats away the West Coast Hop and gets the ankle lock but then Mark Henry runs in for the DQ.
WINNER – KURT ANGLE BY DQ
*** – That was a good match until the shitty ending. Henry splashes Angle through a table post match as Angle yells “Ouch my ribs”
well this week had some good in ring but it was let down by short matches and bad finishes. I don’t see the point of having Henry attack Angle unless they want to pointlessly continue this main event push.
