Previously On and Show Opening
Last week Rory Singer defeated Solomon Hutcherson with a crappy high kick to win the Middleweight fight and advance to the Semi Finals. Kalib says he’s unimpressed with Rory’s jiu jitsu, as Rory was unable to finish Solomon (who is not experienced in jiu jitsu) with a submission. Kendall is especially pissed that the kick that sent his Team DAGGER compatriot home “looked like shit.”
Bisping comments that the score card is 4-1 Team Ortiz. Dana says that he doesn’t feel like Ken’s fighters are learning and that “It’s weird. I don’t know what Ken’s thinking.” Tito says to Ken, “See you next week, same Bat time, same Bat channel.” Excellent.
Team Ortiz Training
They’re training hard, as usual. Matt says he can’t wait to fight. Bisping re-iterates that Matt is overconfident and even cocky. Apparently, Matt likes to defend everyone’s takedowns with no hands. And he seems to do a fine job of it. Bisping’s offended that Matt would make a big point of being to defend takedowns with his hands behind his back, and wants him to use his hands during their session. Bisping takes a handless Hamill down.
At Home
Kalib and Kendall ask Matt about a wrestling move, and, at first, Matt says he’s not allowed to help them. He helps anyway, and, once it’s over, he sits on the chair and says “Let the king rest,” which, of course, the others take offense to, as they think he’s cocky already. They say he thinks wrestling is “the be-all end-all,” and Kendall says, “I’m pushing you into open traffic.”
There’s a BBQ outside and Bisping gets into a pronunciation fight over “basil.”
Kendall decides to hide Matt’s steak. Matt comes into the kitchen and says “Who ate my steak!?” He asks everyone. Kendall laughs a lot. Kendall winds up giving the steak back without incident, as Matt is pretty cool the whole time. Matt says he doesn’t think the other fighters think he’s cocky.
Team Ortiz Training
Tito loves Matt. At the beginning of this segment, he tells Matt, “My first time in the UFC, I had six months training. Just like you!” Tito says Matt is a “stud” and that he works hard. Matt says he wants to work on his jiu jitsu and to become the best, technically.
Team Ortiz Training & At Home
This segment is a bunch of editing involving Matt information. Matt says he doesn’t really know anyone’s name except Mike, Josh, and Danny. As it turns out, he and Danny are good friends and spend a lot of time together. He says he’s taught Danny some ASL and helps him in his training. Danny feels sorry that the other guys all hate Matt. Danny tells Matt what the others think about him. Matt still thinks he’s the best fighter in the house, but says he’s just playing about all the “king” business. Matt actually goes over to Kendall and apologizes for the “let the king rest” incident and they hug. I don’t really know what else you could ask for. Matt seems to have no problem humbling himself by apologizing over things that someone else misconstrued, when he was just joking.
Bisping says Matt is still training too hard, and Matt says, “It’s the way I am,” the way he’s always trained, and that he “can’t hear them yelling.”
Josh, in a video interview, recaps what happened in training: Kendall hit Matt hard with a headkick and then an uppercut. Matt’s jaw hurts pretty bad, so they take him to the hospital. Tito doesn’t think Matt is seriously hurt, but that he just doesn’t know how to react to getting his “bell rung” for the first time.
At Home
Kendall recaps what he did to Matt, acting it all out in the living room. Josh says that the pain will just get worse. Tait says, “I don’t wanna sound cruel, but that’s the way it [MMA] is.”
Danny says that “people are like ‘whatever'” but that he’s worried about Matt and hopes he’s okay.
Matt comes home, and, apparently, he’s alright. He says he’s going to take a few days off. Danny sleeps in Matt’s room in case Matt needs some help.
Team Shamrock Training
They do some full-contact sparring and Tait’s nose got bloodied. He thinks he shouldn’t be training this hard when he could potentially be fighting in a few days. Tait and Ken get into a big argument about training methods, with Ken commenting on how one minute his team is saying they don’t train hard enough, and the next they’re complaining about how they’re training too hard. In a video interview, Tait snarkily calls Ken the “god” of MMA and Ken goes off about how he has experience in this sport and has been training guys for fifteen years. Ken says that Tait is acting like “a little punk,” and then Ken leaves for the day.
At Home
Danny has been getting cereal and sandwiches for Matt when he asks. Bisping, especially, is making fun of Danny for this. Bisping says that Matt never cooks for himself and it seems like he’s milking his injuries. Ed says “I ain’t gonna help Matt.” Kalib says annoying things around bedtime, taunting Danny for helping Matt. Danny says that he’ll help his friends and teammates out no matter what, even if Bisping makes fun of him. Danny seems very good natured. It’s a shame Ed Herman is going to beat his ass.
At Home
This scene opens with a close-up of some ants. Foreshadowing. Brilliant.
Kendall breaks some stuff against the wall outside and says he feels better.
Bisping says he’s had it “up to here” with the house.
Josh says it feels like they’re under house arrest.
Tait says he’d never do this over again.
Rory wants to go home.
Bisping keeps having crazy dreams like his girlfriend doesn’t want anything to do with him.
Ed has dreams about his girlfriend “f*cking around.”
Tait says that it’s like a big sociological experiment that they happen to be insects in. Dear Tait: That is what reality TV is.
Fight Announcement!
Team Ortiz has control. Tito picks Josh vs. Tait. Mike Nickels, at this point, realizes that he has to fight “colossal” Matt.
Shamrock to Tait that they’ll put what happened behind them and train to get him into the semi finals.
Team Shamrock Training
Ken goes one on one with Tait in sparring, cardio, etc, and says that he has to do something to get Tait fired up and get his team some wins. Ken says he didn’t become “the first UFC heavyweight champion” by walking away and quitting.
Team Ortiz Training
Josh, remember, was Tito’s last pick at Light Heavyweight, but he says that Josh works hard.
The Letter
There’s a manilla envelope on the bench addressed to Noah. He puts it in his bag and doesn’t open it. Bisping says, “Oooh, are you in trouble?” During the van ride home, they discuss the lack of privacy in the house and commiserate.
At Home
The guys are wrestling around and being ridiculous in order to have fun. Noah goes to the bathroom and they toilet paper his bed. Someone says, “There is no right way to toilet paper a bed,” and Bisping replies with “Oh, that’s where you are wrong.”
Noah comes out and looks at his bed but has no reaction, and walks downstairs. The guys figure something is up and that he opened the letter in the bathroom. Mike goes outside to see if Noah wants to talk. Noah says it’s bad news but he can’t talk about it. He says it’s bad enough that he might have to go home.
People speculate that something horrible has happened to Noah’s family, his parents, or something. Noah says it might be worse than that. They sit around staring at him in the bedroom, when Noah reveals that something is “going on” with “his old lady.”
I’d like it noted that Noah, in his introductory interview on SpikeTV.com, says that he “keeps his pimp hand strong,” and that his girlfriend would never cheat on him.
Apparently, someone posted something on the internet or sent his girlfriend pictures that implied that he was cheating on her.
Everyone is confused and they all say that “to me, that’s not as important as family, etc.” They don’t think it’s a big deal. But Noah is freaking out and says he needs a phone call or he’s going home.
At Home – Morning
Dana comes to the house to talk to Noah. Noah says he needs to take care of things. Dana says he doesn’t think a phone call is going to help matters any, and that it’ll probably f*ck him up worse. Dana refuses to give Noah a phone call on the basis that every other guy in the house wants to make a phone call as well. Noah is crying in his video interview. Dana, in his video interview, says “I’m not a dickhead. If his family was sick, absolutely I’d let him call.” Dana doesn’t seem to think it’s important that some girl that Noah has been dating for–are you ready?–six months warrants outside contact. Dana says the fighters have to be mentally tough and that he doesn’t give a f*ck about Noah’s relationship issues. Dana refuses the phonecall and says that Noah can either screw his head on or leave.
Noah chooses to leave.
Who’s got the pimp hand, now?
Gym Meeting
Dana tells everyone what happened, reveals that Noah had been with this girl for six months, and everyone is shocked. Kalib thinks it’s silly and says that the girl, if she was worth anything, would have waited for him and not made a big deal out of the situation. Tito’s jaw is stiff and he looks completely, legitimately, scarily pissed off. He remains silent. In his video interview, he just says that fighters have to make sacrifices. Dana says “f*ck Noah” but hopes that he and this girl stay together forever, since he just gave up everything.
Dana says that this means that someone gets to come back to take Noah’s place.
….
And the bastards, of course, end the show at this juncture.
There is no fight this week, but hopefully next week, the guy who comes back will be revealed, and Josh vs. Tait will take place.
Given that the returning fighter has to be a Light Heavyweight who was previously eliminated, it has to be either Jesse Forbes or Kristian Rothaermel. I’m betting it’s Jesse. We’ll see.
The Teams
Team Ortiz
Middleweights: Danny Abbadi, Rory Singer, Kendall Groves.
Light Heavyweights: Matt Hamill, Michael Bisping, Josh Haynes.
Team Shamrock
Middleweights: Kalib Starnes, Ed Herman.
Light Heavyweights: Tait Fletcher, Mike Nickels, ???
