Riding Coattails: The Apprentice – Chew On This

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This week’s episode of The Apprentice rocked my socks for so many reasons. First, the candidates were given an objective task of selling as many Outback steaks and bloomin’ onions as possible to hungry Rutgers tailgaters. I love it when the producers get back to basics and make the players sell their asses off. And in old school Apprentice style, the women and men faced off on separate teams, a fact that seemed to please Trump enormously. What’s more, Carolyn and George put in rare simultaneous appearances, which made for a much better boardroom. I’m not knocking Ivanka, Rancic, or Donald Jr., who have all held their own in seats beside El Trumpo, but Carolyn and George are the original and best sidekick ass whuppers.

Ass whupping was definitely in order after this task concluded. I feel like a broken record pointing this out, but once again, Sean, Michael, and Lee committed the classic Apprentice error of assuming that they had an edge because of who they were rather than what they did. Sure, Lee is a recent college grad and had some good ideas about how to attract students to their tent. The money pit, cheerleaders, and eating contest were all fun in theory, but they ultimately did very little to bring money into the hands of Team Gold Rush. The three men figured that they knew what appealed to college boys: meat, pretty girls, and more meat, but they didn’t think through the best way to convert those attractions into sales. Maybe a kissing booth featuring Sean and the cheerleaders would have helped.

Michael’s firing was inevitable. However, in my opinion, Sean, Lee, and Carolyn latched onto the wrong reason for his downfall. They all belabored the point that Michael’s most grievous error was his willingness to give up exclusivity to the Rutgers cheerleaders and allow Synergy to have access to one or two. Sure, he should have held his ground, but ultimately, Gold Rush got all of the cheerleaders and it didn’t help them, so what did it matter that Michael hemmed and hawed a little? Far worse was Michael’s seemingly brilliant idea to stage an eating contest, which backfired horribly because it filled the bellies of hungry frat boys who in turn didn’t end up paying for the mass quantities they consumed. And was it really Michael’s fault that he wasn’t selling? Someone had to stay on the mike and organize all of the events that Gold Rush had planned out, so it seemed a bit unfair for Sean and Lee to come down on Michael for that. If they wanted him to sell, they should have hired an emcee or done away with their side spectacles altogether.

I’m surprised that Lee wasn’t called onto the carpet for setting the prices as low as he did. George made a brief remark about it, but in my mind, pricing was one of the most critical errors that Gold Rush made on this task. This isn’t the first time that Lee has had problems in this area; during the 7-11 pizza sandwich task, he was unable to convince PM Leslie that they needed to lower the price of the sandwiches. Of course, Leslie had to make the call there, but the fact that Lee couldn’t persuade her to change shows that he’s not a very effective negotiator.

Even though things looked bleak for the women of Synergy at the beginning of the episode (they didn’t get the cheerleaders, had no flyers to hand out at the pep rally, etc.), they really hustled during the actually tailgating party. It was so much fun to watch them play waitresses in their cheerleading outfits and schmooze with the Rutgers baseball players. They kept their eyes on the goal of the task, which was to sell as much food to as many people as possible. Although Roxanne was the project manager, Allie was the star of this task. She came up with the concept of tailgate delivery and also did her best to bond with the head cheerleading coach. The former worked out and the latter didn’t, but nevertheless, Allie proved that she is great at dealing with people.

I loved the fact that the three women got along so well and worked beautifully as a team. This is not the first instance of girl power that The Apprentice has shown; in season two, Jennifer and Sandy bonded as the M&M sisters and came out with a win. I’m sure that they male viewers didn’t mind watching the ladies of Synergy stomp grapes at their reward at the Raphael winery. I doubt that that scene would have been as sexy if Lee, Sean, and Michael had been barefoot in the barrels (and I sincerely doubt that they would have all crowded into one barrel for a kumbai ya moment).

So who’s next on the chopping block? My pick is Lee. He’s done a lot of things right this season, but he really disappointed the Donald on this last task. Carolyn also correctly pointed out that his plea before the final boardroom “sounded desperate,” a sentiment with which I wholeheartedly agree. Now, the kid needed to do whatever it took to save his ass, but he might have been trying a little too hard. If Michael had been able to better defend himself and Sean had taken his side, Lee could easily have been fired. His days are definitely numbered.