Previously On & Show Opening
The show begins with a recap of the fights leading to the semi-finals. Bisping says that everyone was surprised that Matt stood up during his fight with Mike instead of taking him down, and Saul reveals that Matt had told him about his arm and that he’d like it to be a stand-up fight.
Rory says Matt’s fight with Mike was like Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em robots. Josh says that Matt’s arm was useless during the fight. Rory thinks that Matt is done and won’t be back to fight in the semis. Bisping doesn’t like that Matt is hurt when he won his fight and deserves to be in the house training to fight in the semi finals.
At Home
Bisping looks out the window as a car pulls up, and he says, “It’s a car… with a bald person.”
The bald person is Dana White. Dana is there to have dinner with the fighters to celebrate their getting into the semi finals.
Dana: What’s the first thing you’re gonna do when you get home?
Bisping: Take a wild guess.
My guess is that he’s going to spend some “quality time,” as it were, with his “geelfriend,” as it were.
Bisping sees bodies through the window. It’s EVERYONE. Well, everyone except Noah, who is no doubt blackballed, and Matt, who’s still in the hospital. But yes, Mike, Tait, Kristian, Solomon. I don’t recall seeing Danny, but that could just be because he’s mousy and off tweezing his eyebrows and Matt wasn’t around so there’s no useful footage of him.
Dana says that he’s brough everyone back to the house to live and train with the guys who are in the semi finals, as he feels that people get a little lonely toward the end of the season.
Some people are happy! Kendall and Solomon do the “Dagger!” handshake and I am elated. My notes here fill half a page and all it says is “DAGGEEEER!”
Some people are not happy.
Bisping’s video interview says, “DANA! NO!!” and he says he was horrified at the thought of living with so many people again. Rory said he was enjoying the quiet.
Everyone is gathered around. Dana has a bag full of something. Kendall hoped it was car keys for the lot of them.
In the bag… is ten thousand dollars. Dana says that they’re going to play pool, and it’ll be Ken vs. Tito, best 2/3, for ten thousand dollars.
Ken says, “I can’t play pool!” and I believe him.
Now. Here is where I stop to say. Ten thousand dollars for winning two games of pool? How much do the fighters get for finishing their fights, again? The guys who drop everything, quit their classes and their jobs, leave their families behind for weeks to come train and be on Dana’s TV show [which makes him money]? How much do they get? Sure, Dana will say something about how the fighting on the show shouldn’t be about the money, or some other inane, transparent thing, but apparently $10,000 for two well-off fighters playing pool on TV is reasonable. The money would’ve been better spent if divided between the guys who won their fights.
Now, that said. Pool Shark Ken is a f*cking hustler. “I can’t play pool!” my ass. He wiped the floor with Tito, easily. Tito goes into that pissed-off-but-smiling-and-good-natured mode he has, and stomps around saying, “I hate f*ckin’ losing!” Ken’s pretty satisfied with himself and says, “Back to normal tomorrow, but I still hate Tito’s team.”
Fight Decisions & Announcement – Light Heavyweights
It’s official that Matt can’t fight in the semi finals, even though he won his fight against Mike. Mike can’t fight either, because he suffered a broken nose during the fight. Dana says he’s going to bring back Tait and Kristian and see who would like to continue.
They speak to Tait first. Tait says he’s not prepared to fight again. Dana is absolutely blown away. He goes on that thing about how, “You do know this is the chance of a lifetime, etc., etc.” and Tait is unmoved. Tito says that some people just aren’t made to be fighters.
They speak to Kristian. Kristian says his head is still sore and he doesn’t want to fight in the semi finals. He feels out of shape and he doesn’t think he can compete. Ken tells him that last time, he didn’t even fight, and this is a chance to redeem himself. After Kristian maintains that he doesn’t want to fight, Ken says that Kristian doesn’t belong there.
Dana says, “I know a guy, right now… that if I offered him this, he’d take it.”
Ross comes in and says, “Yeah, let’s do it, man.” Ross, see, normally fights at 205, and just dropped down to 185 for the show. He smiles and he’s thrilled to be fighting again and Dana says, “I love guys like him.” Dana’s got three emotions: anger, disbelief, and skeezy greed. The first, you know, is his “Do you wanna be a f*ckin’ fighter!?” The second is “I can’t believe what you’re f*ckin’ tellin’ me here, that you don’t want to be a f*ckin’ fighter.” The third is that weird smile he gets on his face and his little giggle and hand-rubbing when he knows something is going to make him money. It’s creepy, I tell you, but that is our UFC President.
They decide the Light Heavyweight semi final fights will be:
Jesse vs. Josh
Bisping vs. Ross
Bisping tells Ross that he’s got some f*ckin’ balls, and he thinks the weight-class switcheroo is a nice trick. Of course he does. Bisping defeated Ross in their last fight. Two minutes into the first round. With an armbar.
I call bullshit, since I wanted Solomon back in. I was begging for a weight-class switcheroo on his part way back when Noah left, but no, we got Jesse back.
So we have this interesting (or disastrous) situation where two people who originally lost their fights are in the semi-finals.
Josh says, “I’ll be damned if I let one of these guys beat me. How do you lose to a loser?”
There’s a commercial here for UFC On Demand at UFC.com which I, for the record, think is a fine idea. The prices are reasonable and there are a lot of fights available already. This also likely means that we won’t have to wait around for weeks for unaired preliminary fights to show up (if they do) on UFC Unleashed.
Fight Decisions & Announcement – Middleweights
These decisions are much easier, as no winners quit, and, thankfully, no winners are injured.
They decide on:
Kalib vs. Kendall
Rory vs. Ed
Dana says these matchups have nothing to do with Team Ortiz/Team Shamrock, but it sure is convenient.
Both Middleweight semi final fights will take place, and then the Light Heavyweight semis will take place. The first match is Kalib vs. Kendall, tonight.
Kendall says that Kalib’s resume is impressive. Kalib says he was hoping to meet with Kendall in the finals.
Team Ortiz Training
Tito says Kendall is very impressive, and over the past few weeks of training, he’s catapulted to a different level, and he’s a much more complete fighter.
Team Shamrock Training
Kalib says that there’s no reason he can’t win the fight.
Fight Day
Kendall thinks that Kalib doesn’t respect his skills and sees him as a stepping stone, and he resents that. Kalib says he doesn’t take anyone lightly.
Kendall wears his Hawaiian flag to the cage and says that Kalib is “just a man, he bleeds just like me.”
Kalib says he plans on leaving everything he has in the ring.
Tito says to Kendall, in the ring, “Like a f*ckin’ shark, you never stop moving.”
The semi final fights will be three five minute rounds.
The Fight!
They begin standing. Kalib looks really smooth and light on his feet. Kalib backs Kendall up to the fence, then lifts him and slams him down beautifully. Kalib pounds him with fists on the mat.
They stand up, and Kalib throws some knees. Kendall takes direction well and does everything Tito tells him to do. The fighters are boxing and smiling and being sportsmanlike. They both connect with solid punches and kicks. The side of Kendall’s nose starts bleeding, but it’s not too bad. Both guys connect nicely with high kicks, and as the round ends, Kendall is punching at Kalib furiously.
Round 2
They touch gloves. Kendall is scoring well with punches and kicks, and Kalib takes him down. Kalib is on top but not doing much, so the ref stands them up. After this, Kalib drops down as Kendall goes for a high kick and then Kalib takes him down. It was pretty cool to see. Kalib still can’t do much on the ground and he can’t get mount position. There’s a problem, as apparently Kalib keeps pulling Kendall’s shorts. The referee warns him. Near the end of this round, they’re striking again, but they’re exhausted, Kalib seemingly more so.
Round 3
In the corner, Tito tells Kendall to go for the body. In the other corner, Kalib says, “My f*cking rib is cracked.”
Kendall throws kicks to Kalib’s injured left side and knees him hard. Kalib stops and says “My rib is f*cked, it’s broken,” which is a verbal tapout, about 30 seconds into round 3.
Your winner, advancing to the finals, Kendall Grove.
Dana says the fight was excellent. I agree with Dana. This was easily the best fight of the season.
Ken says “I know that his rib wasn’t damaged to the point where he couldn’t fight anymore.”
Team Ortiz is very happy. Kendall says the win is “unbelievable. I want to cry right now but tears won’t come out.”
Kalib says he didn’t feel his cardio was up to where it could have been and that he’s used to a different kind of training. Ken says there’s no question that Kalib should’ve been in the finals, but he quit.
On paper, I thought there was no way Kalib would lose, but both of the fighters were pretty much even until Kalib couldn’t continue. In any case, it’s a victory for Team DAGGER, so who am I to complain? Kendall advances to the TUF Finale, where he will face either Rory or Ed. Rory vs. Ed happens next week, and from the preview, the show looks like a doozy of juvenile proportions.
The Fights
Middleweight Semi-Finals
Rory Singer vs. Ed Herman
Middleweight Finals
Kendall Grove vs. TBD
Light Heavyweight Semi-Finals
Josh Haynes vs. Jesse Forbes
Michael Bisping vs. Ross Pointon
Light Heavyweight Finals
TBD vs. TBD
IMPORTANT!
Remember, The Ultimate Fighter Finale is on Saturday, June 24, at 9:00 PM on Spike TV.
Remember also that next week (6/15), two new episodes of TUF are going to air (making my life that much more difficult) in succession, at 10:00 and 11:00, postponing TNA iMPACT! until Midnight.
