The Monday Night Rabble

Y 2 J


Last night we saw ECW relaunch – and aside from a set of mixed reviews around the world, the Rabble had a blast. Let’s address that really quick – if you were sitting with friends – enjoying the show – and not trying to put it into some realm of responsible booking. It was a riot. Cena played the heel like a trooper. Show is their new monster. Rey Rey jarred his spine. Funk bled from every pore in his body. And we have a new Champion!

Now before we get to the show – let’s talk about syndication locations:
Inside Pulse – Home of the Rabble, 10,000,000 served.
NWS Superstars – Land of the Rabble, Independent Wrestling served.
Monday Night Rabble – Watermark of the Rabble, growing archive of Rabble-like objects!

Now before we get to the show – let’s get to the Rabble-ites:
ERIC – He goes first because he’s sitting to my right.
BILL – He goes next because he’s sitting next to Eric.
DANI – She goes next because she’s right behind me (aww yeahhhh)
JENNA – She brought the beer!
HERNANDEZ – Because he’s our spanish guy.
CHRIS – Because he’s sitting to my left.

See how easy that was?

Now let’s get to Raw, shall we?

Tonight – in loving memory of John Tenta – The Earthquake.

Hey now – it’s Heyman!
“Good evening ladies and gentleman.. my name is Paul Heyman..”
“And I didn’t iron my sign” – Eric
“Are they in his Mom’s basement?” – Hernandez

Heyman discusses that the match went through 3 refs, and Heyman called the pin even as he was not an official. It was though, under ECW rules, so anything goes. So our champion is, in fact, Rob Van Dam.

Tomorrow night though – the WWE title will be retitled as the ECW championship. ECW recognizes Edge as the #1 Contender, and will face RVD at Vengeance and they invite Edge and Lita to show up tomorrow night.

Now though – RVD! Who is getting booed to hell! He says hi and that’s about it.

Tonight – Cena & Edge
Tonight – Trips & The Spirit Squad

Now – Randy Orton.
“..HEY!…… umm… HEY!” – Bill (to Randy’s music)
“..pardon me, any of you ladies have a pocketbook – I had mexican earlier.” – Me

..Welcome back Randy..
“Welcome back to a match with no real ending..” – Eric

Orton bails from Kane for awhile – then a slap gets no sell. Kane swings and ducked by Orton – but then reversed and he throws Orton into the corner. Kane eats a back elbow and then is thrown to his own corner and kicked down. Throws Kane to the ropes – a nice standing dropkick from Orton.

Sit-up spot from Kane and a big boot that.. err.. kind of misses. Throws Orton to the corner and now the beatings begin. Kane sends him corner to corner for the short clotheslines – then the side slam.
“..So when does Kane job?” – Chris
“Wait for it..” – Bill

Kane goes up top and Orton runs up and fights to the top for dominance – Kane gets a headbutt to drop Orton and then the top rope clothesline. Chokeslam locked, but Orton holds onto the ropes to block it.
“This IS a wrestling match at the beginning.” – Bill
“A fine point Bill.” – Me

Orton bails and Kane follows as they head up to the ramp… get ready for the fake Kane. There are girls screaming all happy to see Randy Orton.
“I’M happy to see Randy Orton” – Chris

So they fight all the way to the top of the key and get the double countout.
“Wha?!” – Chris
“A spot not seen since Wrestlemania 4..” – Me

So Randy gets ahead of the game and goes for the RKO – denied and Kane THROWS him down back first – hot lil spot and here comes Kane^2.
“ROBOKANE!” – Bill

They go fist to fist and a double chokeslam set up on the edge of the platform. Faux Kane breaks the chokeslam set-up and pushes him right off the edge with a sickening thud… see – no ending.


COMMERCIAL (One – 9:11)

Hey Charlie ‘Ladykiller’ Haas is here!
“Hear that pop?” – Hernandez

So they give us a replay to the Lillian bump – and it’s now officially a bit.

Charlie’s got the mic.

“Sometimes you make mistakes. Ya’ll saw the mistake last week. Because of my carelessness somebody got hurt last week. I’d like to invite Lillian into the ring.”
“Don’t do it Lillian.. it’s a trap” – Bill

“Lillian – I’m horribly sorry about what I did last week. When I knocked you down last week, it was careless, but you have to believe that it was a terrible accident on my part.”
“She forgives him, and the bit ends..” – Bill

Hey and Viscera is here… thank god… yes… I’m kidding.

So Big Visc is in the ring…
Audience Member Of The Night: “EAT HIM VISC!”

“That was very sweet… she may accept your apology… but I don’t.” – Viscera
“I’ve had sweeter” – Hernandez

So Visc clotheslines him – hurls him to the corner HARD – big charge & squash. Lillian asking Viscera to not do this as the big man hits the ropes and the belly drop.
“..HEY YOU… get your daaamn haaands off her….” – Me
“So now Lillian has to apologize to Charlie..” – Eric
“Then the week after Viscera has to apologize to Cloacus..” – Me

So we get a refresher on Trips with the kiss my ass club from last week. It seems so long ago really.
“What’s the point of drugging Trips’ water anyway.. he’s just going to spit it out” – Bill
“Shane’s nipples… shane’s nipples.. YES! SPOT OF THE NIGHT!” – Me

Eric makes a point to notice that there are green lights behind Triple H.

Tonight though is going to be Vince’s State Of The WWE address. Coach is in the back trying to make sure the spot is all set.
“..yes.. the money shot.” – Chris

COMMERCIAL (Two – 9:23)

So a flash to last night of Lawler getting Tazzed out and Eugene getting beaten by Sandman..
“Yay, I’m watching the retard getting caned!” – Hernandez

In the back, Eugene has a bruise and is worried for Hacksaw Jim Duggan. Jim Duggan wants to know of ‘Babe Ruth was worried when he fought Godzilla on the top of the Empire State Building’ …. umm.. right. No he just chanted USA USA..
“…network.” – Bill

“Meanwhile, back at the kennel…” – Bill
Torrie heading to the ring for a wet clothing thing.

Now though, Coach introduces –
“A wax copy of Vince McMahon – Bill
“With moving eyebrows” – Eric

“The WWE is a juggernaut..” – Vince
“Bitch” – Hernandez
“We’ve relaunched a 3rd brand of ECW on Sci-Fi tomorrow night. Paul Heyman has made it clear that we have a new WWE champion named Rob Van Dam. Not withstanding the recreation of this 3rd brand, there are other things that have happened. It’s one thing for me to establish a ‘Kiss My Ass Club’ – it’s another for someone to kick me in the gut, bend me over, and slam me down to the canvas – exposing my derrier to the world.”
“Is he claiming rape?” – Me

Vince then goes onto explain that after Shawn Michaels – he used the Spirit Squad to stop the HBK – and HBK is no longer around. Now Triple H will also have to face the same Spirit Squad in a gauntlet match.
“Red Triple H is about to die…” – Me
“Triple H is about to die…” – Eric

So Vince claims that he is going to reunite Triple H with Shawn Michaels on the ‘Highway To Hell’.

COMMERCIAL (Three – 9:32)

So now is the ‘Wet & Wild Water Contest’
“And Lillian who can’t believe she introduced this…” – Bill

So now here comes Torrie in a white tank top and panties set-up.
“Where’s the slip and slide down to the ring?” – Hernandez
“Her puppy is wearing a bathing suit..” – Me
“The fact that the King just admitted he was wet… and that bothers me…” – Eric

Candice Michelle wearing all white – a tank – silver belt – pink see through thingie.. so far Candice beating out Torrie – although the Rabble disagrees with me.
“Where’s Maria?!?!” – Me

So the match starts and they grab the Super Soakers.
“Torrie knows how to pump things” – Bill

So after that fails they move onto water balloons. Candice grabs Torrie and a belly to back sends Torrie right to the pile of waterballoons.
“And apparently it’s cold..” – Dani

Candice hits a backbreaker. Then loads Torrie with some balloons – gets to the top turnbuckle and a splash for two. Now Candice grabs a bucket of water and hits the REF with the water.
“Why?!?!” – Dani
“Because she wanted to get three…” – Me

Candice does the spin and an elbow misses. Torrie gets up and throws Candice to the corner – and Torrie follows up with a clothesline. Torrie then coats HERSELF in water and butt rides Candice…
“Vince has ruined wet t-shirt contests for me.” – Dani
“Were you ok with wet t-shirt contests before?” – Me

So back in the ring – Torrie grabs Candice and while Candice tries to grab a bucket of water… Torrie gets it – hits the facebuster and gets the pin. Weak.


So Torrie throws some balloons to the crowd and then at JR for a bit.
“He’s dodging them pretty good” – Hernandez
“And he can only see half of them…” – Me

We then get the Canadian Walk of Fame – hosted by Trish Stratus. Kinda neat too… she does a song and dance number… she has a peck of a kiss with Pamela Anderson
“Trish now has Hepatitus” – Bill

COMMERCIAL (Four – 9:45)

So now we get a flash to the win of RVD last night. Some match spots. The controversy of who counted the pin. All of this discussed more later in the show, I’m sure.

In the back – the Spirit Squad are going to do what Vince told them to. They are going to destroy Triple H.
“…and Frank Drebin” – Me

COMMERCIAL (Five – 9:52)
As a note – the Rabble all agrees – the ECW commercials are kinda hot.

Hey! Everyone! It’s time to play the game!!
“It’s all about my nipples…” – Me
“It’s all about DX… we’ll be at Vengeance.” – Bill

Gauntlet Match!

Hey! Here comes Vince with the microphone.
“Hey look! It’s Triple H, the King of Kings, the Game – look at him.”
“A spectacal! Now, the bearded woman!” – Bill

Vince now asks the ref to leave the ring. He then shows him what he did to Shawn Michaels… PAL!
“Bucko!” – Me

Vince feels that was way to quick…
“Let’s show it again” – Hernandez


In runs Mikey and EATS a clothesline hard! Back to his feet – Mikey throws fists in the corner. Mikey is just a short lil guy as he gets reversed into the corner and short arm clotheslined. He eats a suplex – a DX chop – and a knee drop.

Trips throws Mikey into the ropes – a boot to his gut – but Trips doesn’t sell hard…. and in runs Kenny now!


Kenny gets tossed to the corner – and as Trips is setting Mikey up for the pedigree – Kenny charges in and now there is a doubleteam attack on Trips in the corner. They throw Hunter into the ropes – double elbow drops him. Kenny sets up Mikey for the standing moonsault. Mikey gets thrown into the corner – then hits Kenny with a neckdrop. Hunter in the corner – and Mikey charges and takes the hard way over the top corner HARD!

Hunter runs in for a hard spinebuster on Kenny – and now in run…


So after a brief moment of assault from Trips – all four kick him down and there is a clusterf*** all over Trips.

The Spirit Squad now ram Trips around the steps. Grab some wire and choke him out with some cable wire. The crowd chanting for HBK as the SS bring him in and do the four corner lift and drop.
“And BOOM goes the dynamite” – Hernandez

Kenny runs in with a steel chair and they set-up the chair on his knee – and Vince says he wants it on Trips neck.
“We called for a live murder tonight!” – Chris
“And then an in ring sex celebration..” – Bill

So Vince asks for Mitch to come out to finish up – but Mitch gets THROWN out – and here comes Shawn Michaels to throw down – a superkick to Mitch’s chest and down runs Shawn. They fight back to back.
“Classic” – Chris
“So is this the foreshadowing of DX?” – Dani
“No, this is the obvious tonguing of the asshole..” – Me

They empty the ring and there they are face to face… Shawn hits a superkick. He gives the double pointer to Hunter and the ring is cleared!

They go head to head… DOUBLE HIGH FIVE! DOUBLE DX CHOP!
“Served to you on a big neon green platter” – Bill

Hunter hits the top turnbuckle – MOONS McMahon and Shawn double points it… DX Chops all over the ring… Hunter does the big bicep – Shawn does the kneeling spot…


COMMERCIAL (Six – 10:10)

In the back Spirit Squad are complaining how close they were. DX vs. Spirit Squad at Vengeance!
“That’s lame” – Dani
“Not when DX wins the tag titles…” – Me

Hey.. now to bring the show up… Hacksaw Jim Duggan…
“Maybe he’ll hit Eugene with the 2×4 like Sandman?” – Bill


Okay – so I missed the entire match because I was talking to my sister on the phone. She’s in this hospital with food poisoning. Get better Nikki.

Garbanzo won.


So after the match – Amalgam ties Eugene in the ropes – Armando makes him watch as he ass-slams Hacksaw…

Oh and sometime in that 30 seconds of crap Garbanzo broke the 2×4 over his own head.

COMMERCIAL (Seven – 10:20)

So we get some SEE NO EVIL.. and then back in the ring.. Mick Foley!
“Yes, that’s what See No Evil was.. a car crash.” – Bill

Mick’s supporting a beaten in eye.
“Man have I got some great news for all of you. It seems that the blurry vision I got from trying to extinguish ECW is going to heal up in a week or so. All for my WWE fans. The old Mick Foley is back… the cuddly guy. The human muppet. Here at the University of Pennsylvania. What I’m trying to understand is —–” – Mick

Hey wait, he just got ‘Woo’d! Ric is here!
“..these two at Vengeance..” – Hernandez
“In a blood letting competition?” – Eric
“A 2 second match.” – Bill
“No no.. who can lose more first.” – Eric

Flair grabs the mic – “Woo!”
“What he said.” – Bill

“What the hell are you doing in my ring?” – Mick
“I don’t care about last night, One Night Stand.. I’ve been trying to talk to you for three years. I don’t care about anything you did last night including lighting yourself on fire. Bleeding means nothing to me.”
“I do that every morning shaving” – Bill

“I want to talk about you and me. It occurs to me that you have made innuendos about what I’ve said about your wrestling career.. and god knows I’ve wanted to say it for three years. You realize my name is Ric Flair. This whole scenario where you stood up for the WWE is a bunch of crap. You wanted to bring back that ECW stunt show because you are just that.. a glorified stuntman. For ten years, guys like the Natcha Boy, Triple H, The Rock, Stone Cold, Kurt Angle – have walked out of that curtain and wrestled to greatness. Wherever I go, people go ‘Ric, you know what’s the coolest thing I ever saw… Me winning my 16th title? No… Mick going off the hell in a cell’ And that pisses me off. You fell off a cage and you are great. That’s bullshit!”

Mick now – “That’s not what this is all about. Not whether or not I was a great wrestler. It gets under your skin. I know all about you. These people don’t care about you and Harley Race at Starrcade. They don’t remember you and Steamboat in New Orleans. They don’t remember you and Terry Funk in I Quit… They don’t remember that. They are MY WWE fans… you will never be in the same league – with your 10,000 dollar suits – in the same league with the guy in the ripped flannel, the Santa’s Village t-shirt who tried to save a few bucks at the Econolodge… woo… What’s really gnawing you is that you can do NOTHING about it, because the glorified stuntman could rip you apart.. LIKE THAT.”
“The Aristocrats!” – Bill

Flair then elbows nothing!

Ric wants him to hit him… “I could take you.. just not now.” And Mick bails.

Ric – “What do I gotta do – throw some thumbtacks in the ring? Get a ladder? Get a table? I want you in the ring now… FOLEY FOLEY – YOUR ASS – HERE – NOW!”

Mick – “You don’t get my ass or any other bodypart now. I got a challenge for you. You don’t have to use thumbtacks or a ladder or a table. I’m going to out wrestle you, at Vengeance. Your hometown of Charlotte, North Carolina – and to make sure that I did it your way – two out of three falls.”

Ric – “I’ll see you in Charlotte. We’re not screwing around. This is not ECW. This is WWE. You got it.”

Mick – “I’ll embarrass you in front of your own fans. The legend of Ric Flair will be done.”

Ric – “Do you hear that Lord?? WOOOOOOOOO — WOOOOOOOOO”

An incredible promo.. how frigging fantastic was that?

COMMERCIAL (Eight – 10:38)

Joining them down in the commentating position is Shelton – but here comes Johnny Nitro and Melina.. and I have to say Melina is looking quite nice tonight. Her boots are shiny.

Just announced – Carlito / Nitro / Shelton – Triple Threat for Vengeance.

Apples and Cameras

Lock up to start – Nitro pushes Carlito to the ropes – shouldercheck drops Nitro – and a set of hiptosses between both – then a faceslam sends Nitro down.

Melina steals Carlito’s apple and he drops Nitro to just go after her. Nitro though charges and hits him into the barricade – throws in Carlito and hits the top rope to get back in. Nitro slams down Carlito and Melina leglocks him and gets only two.

Front facelock from Nitro. Carlito stands up out of it, and tries to flip Nitro – but he lands on his feet. Carlito drops to his knees and gets a solid chop on Nitro. Hits a second rope back elbow. Then a leg drop. A knee lift. Carlito all sorts of solid tonight. THIS time he hits the back bodydrop to Nitro.. he goes after the man and gets tripped and thrown out.

Shelton gets up and moves to outside the ring. Nitro tries to superplex him in. Carlito spins out of it to land on his feet behind Nitro. Melina distracts the ref as Shelton trips up Nitro so he lands flat on his back when he tries to go for the BackCracker… Nitro rolls up Carlito for the win!


In the back – Todd Grisham – talking to Mickie James!

She explains that Ashley called her psycho and broke her leg.
Then Trish Stratus popped her shoulder during her rematch for the belt.
Now Beth Phoenix has to eat food through a straw.

One thing that will always leave Mickie and always love her. The title.

Showing up .. Randy Orton? Mickie bails.
“Randy told her to beat it, or I’ll shit in your purse” – Inside Pulse’s Shawn Norton

Now Randy’s not the guy who whines and complains…. Randy wants us to know that the championship .. is his destiny.
“Orton Champ” – Me
“He’s got five words to go with.. good he picked one” – Bill

COMMERCIAL (Nine – 10:49)

Hey the Highlanders.
Insert ‘Be Only One’ joke here.
Insert ‘FREEEEEDOMMMM’ joke here.
Insert ‘Cheap Scottish Bastard’ joke here.
Insert ‘Sheep f*cker’ joke here.
Insert ‘Dead Tag Team Division’ joke here.


…Lita takes the mic away from her…
“WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO US?” – Bill & Me (Who made it capital letters)

She introduces Edge. Edge explains that he changed the scope of wrestling last night. At Vengeance he’ll beat RVD for the title too. Edge then says that he wants to answer Paul’s personal invitation and they should go to ECW tomorrow night.

Edge still knows how to work a mic. I’m a fan.

Who is in the audience? It seems it’s Stevie… Justin Credible.. and Balls Mahoney. They have tickets too.

COMMERCIAL (Ten – 10:57)


Edge comes down. Lita not looking bad… I can admit when she does it for me.

Cena time!
“And cut to black” – Hernandez

Cena runs in – pounds on Edge. Edge thumbs him in the eye and bails. Cena charges him and throws him into the stairs – tosses Edge to the ring. Kicks him down in the corner – and in runs Lita and leaps on his back.

Edge bails to the ECW side of the ring – and runs through the audience. Justin Credible decks Cena and now Cena grabs him and flips him in… Takes out Justin with a chair. Takes out Stevie with a chair. Balls with a chair. Hot stuff – and in the ring with a mic.

“At One Night Stand – I got an awakening as how ECW does business. According to them, hell, anybody can show up. When they get there, they can do whatever the hell they want. Well you know what I think? I think I like it. As for now, I think I really like it. Because tomorrow night is the television debut of ECW… and I’m gonna show up. When I do I’m gonna do whatever the hell I wanna do. So thank you Paul Heyman for throwing this party, I guarantee you John Cena will have an EXTREMELY good time…”

Can I tell you how much I’m loving Cena these days?

But let’s find out what the Rabble thought of tonight’s show:
ERIC – “Relatively solid. DX.”
BILL – “Carlito / Nitro – Damn good.”
JENNA – “DX reveal was a little bit of a letdown.. the ECW stuff at the end made up for it. They all got in on one ticket.”
HERNANDEZ – “Pretty good. I liked it and am enjoying the difference between production values.”
CHRIS – “Usual predictability.. check.”
ME – “Two words.. In Green… Crotch Chops… Oh that’s right. R U READY?”

So now – you thought the Rabble was over? Well you are kinda right – the main portion of the Rabble is done. NOW THE BONUS MATERIAL!

What to see at INSIDE PULSE?

Travis Leamons tells us why we should watch Entourage!
Michaelangelo McCuller continues his reviews of the Top 50 movies ever!
Iain Burnside breaks down comics like only a drunk Brit can.
Gregory Wind tells us if Sonic Youth is aging well.
Bebito Jackson begins a five part journey of the Sega Saturn.

And now – wait – there’s more! Penny, who didn’t get a chance to see Raw tonight – gives her commentary on ECW: ONE NIGHT STAND!


I won’t be home tonight for the live Raw, so here’s a commentary.



ECW fans really ARE idiots. At least the ones the in ballroom last night were. In their blind Smark hatred of Cena they made all true ECW fans look like hypocrites to the casual viewer, and here’s why.

Sandman. Can’t wrestle for shit, never could. Massive over because he drinks, smokes, hits people with sticks and can take a good beating.

Mikey Whipwreck. Never could do anything BUT take a good beating. Fans love him. Still, CANNOT wrestle.

Balls Mahoney. Hardcore chair swinging freak. (Dammit Vince, if you’re too cheap to spring for playback rights to “Enter Sandman at LEAST get “Big Balls” for Balls. F*ck man! You sprung for “War Machine” for Taz!) Hardcore, can take a good beating, STILL CANNOT WRESTLE, loved by fans.

Why am I pointing this out?

Because if the Hammerstein ECW fans were the TRUE hardcore ECW fans they claim to be, Cena should have won them over.

He showed no fear.

He took a good pounding and kept getting up.

KNOWING fans might punch him he STILL had the balls to follow RVD into the crowd.

When they chanted “you can’t wrestle” he broke out a wrestling move. When they chanted “Same old shit” he pulled out a few things he hadn’t used since he was The Prototype.

If Cena was ANYONE BUT John Cena, the fans would have been chanting his name by even halfway through the match purely for the balls he showed.

So the Smarks have now proven themselves petty hypocrites whose opinions mean nothing and given Vince even MORE reason to just ignore the whiny bitches, and here’s why.

When Cena was the Prototype in OVW, and actually wrestled, more than competantly I might add, the Smarks couldn’t suck his cock fast enough. He was the Smarks’ Golden Boy. They screamed and begged for him to get the call-up. He did. He was now just John Cena, generic face. The Smarks bitched, figuring he’d get buried. And if he weren’t so damned good on the stick, he would have been. But he found his footing, he found what worked.
And while casual fans booed him, the Smarks LOVED his wigger routine. They ejaculated every time he burned someone with a good freestyle, especially when they showed how smart he is. I know the Smarks loved it when he called Benoit a “:Dynamite Rip-off”.

Then a funny thing happened. Cena’s drive, energy, talent and showmanship got him over with the marks, and the Smarks got cranky. He stopped using a lot of pure wrestling moves because in the limits of the *gag* “WWE Style”, he worked best as a brawler. The Smarks got pissy. Then young hot women started getting moist for him, while little kids with no clue what wrestling really is started hero-worshipping him. The Smark’s Predicability Scale went into overdrive, and suddenly “Cena’s a punk, he can’t wrestle, they’re pushing him down our throats, they need to get him off my TV”.


Cena stopped “wrestling” because he’s a team player and does his job as he is told to. And he’s done so well he was allowed to slip a few wrestling moves back into his repetoire. His matches are always fluid, he almost NEVER misses a spot. Smarks tune this out, pretend either it doesn’t happen or it’s only because his opponent is carrying him. Cena works the style he’s ordered to work. He does his job. Imagine the nerve of that guy, doing what he’s paid TO do. How dare he?

Last night, regardless of being billed as John Cena, we got The Prototype. He let loose, he played the fans perfectly, going heel like he knew he had to. He used moves WWE doesn’t like him to. He showed more balls than HHH ever would have. And yet even to the end the Smarks pissed on him to show how smart they are.

Funny thing about that “Same Old Shit” chant. Every match last night, to be fair and honest, was the same old shit. It was better than average, but it was everything these guys usually do when let loose. But the crowd loved it. Cena did NOT do the “same old shit” and was still vilified.

Fuck you Smarks. ONS was a damn good show and proved that WWECW can work. It was different than what WWE offers and it entertained me, something wrestling hasn’t done consistantly for me for years. If the new ECW fails, it will be because of YOU. Yes YOU. ECW will fail because NOTHING pleases you. Because your shallow hypocritical bitches who have nothing better to do than gripe. So f*ck you Smarks. Stop watching wrestling if it pisses you off so much. I watch Cena because he ENTERTAINS ME. I will watch ECW because IT WILL ENTERTAIN me. You? You’ll watch to find some small stupid thing to whine about.

Sorry my rant got long winded but I’ve just had enough of the Smarks. Yeah I may be a “Smart fan” because I know the behind the scenes shit like the Smarks do. Difference I only criticize when something is clearly stupid and could drive away fans, like Vince VS God, or Katie Vick, or the exceedingly stupid Kane VS Feaux Kane. But aside of that? I let wrestling try to entertain me. I give everything a fair chance. I suspend my disbelief. The Smarks wouldn’t know how to enjoy themselves if Angelina Jolie was spreading her cheeks for them begging to be pegged. They’d probably sit there going “Why couldn’t you sell that punch in Tomb Raider better? You no-sold like Hogan!”.

Smarks can lick me where and when I bleed.

Until next time I’m Penny, ironicly the monetary amount a Smark’s opinion is worth.