Rasslin’ Roundtable: WWE Vengeance

Eugene vs. Umaga

PK: What can really be said about this match?
Winner – UUUUUUUUUUUUmaga

Widro: I loathe Eugene
Winner – Umaga

Matthew Michaels: The Rock’s cousin vs. Eric Bischoff’s nephew — a dream match! Maybe Umaga can beat some smarts into him… They can’t be planning on breaking Jamal’s streak with DINSMORE can they?
Winner – Umaga

Vinny Truncellito: Continue the streak; kill the retard.
Winner – Umaga

Blatt: You know, I think Umaga’s best suited in ECW. Not because I really want to see him there, but I believe that Heyman might be the only guy I can think of who might be able to book him so I’d have any interest. I see these two on a PPV match and I think “Man, I’m certainly going to have to go to the bathroom at some point during this three hour show. I think Gene’s getting squashed here.
Winner – Umaga

Michaelangelo McCullar: I feel bad for Eric S. On the one hand, Eugene’s getting a guaranteed beating. On the other hand, it’s from Umaga. That’s the kind of shit that causes sleepless nights.
Winner – Umaga

Kane vs. Imposter Kane

PK: In order for this to continue (unfortunately), the Fake Kane has to win. And, seriously, how can there be a real pay off in this bullshit storyline? Unless the Imposter ends up being Lex Luger or Randy Savage, or someone else really big, the unmasking will be a huge let down.
Winner – Imposter Kane

Widro: I wish they got Leslie Nielsen to hunt down more clues
Winner – Fake Kane

Matthew Michaels: So, do they job Retro-Kane out and unmask him here, or make him the proverbial force to be reckoned with? My head hurts, and Smackdown needs Kane BADLY, so who knows? Maybe we’ll find out Glen Jacobs has been impersonating Kane since the de-masking, and this is the REAL brother of The Undertaker…
Winner – FaK(eK)ane

Vinny Truncellito: Ugh. This is the exact type of stupidity that makes me hate RAW, and WWE in general.
Winner – Retro-Kane, whoever the Hell he might be

Blatt: What a weird angle. It used to be that Kane’s move set, movements and demeanor was a rip-off of the Undertaker. Now, years later after Kane has developed his own style (to a certain degree) we get an old, re-hashed Undertaker story line? We’ve seen so many “fake” angles that this one doesn’t phase me. I just wanna know who else has Kane’s build?
Winner – Retro-Kane

Michaelangelo McCullar: What the f*ck did Glen Jacobs do to deserve this? Oh, yeah, he made See No Evil. I’ve got no sympathy for his ass.
Winner – Kane

Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

PK: See, the thing that we are forgetting here, is that Angle was under WWE Rules for the past 6 years…so how does this really give Orton the advantage?
Winner – Angle

Widro: I have a feeling Orton is going to job for a bit
Winner – Angle

Matthew Michaels: Randy was just suspended, and it’s hard for me to believe they’d job multi-time ECW World Champ Justin Credible to Angle in like a minute, but would even consider giving Randy a win here. Even though it’s “WWE Rules.” Kurt needs to keep ECW strong, especially with Cena and Edge favorites at this particular PPV.
Winner – Kurt Angle

Vinny Truncellito: If the intention is to help get Orton back on track, then he should get his duke back, although nefarious means are expected. Angle’s been over huge lately, and a loss via cheating would only strengthen his face heat in ECW.
Winner – Randy Orton

Blatt: Angle is the man. Period. We should see him lay waste to Orton like he’s done in the past. Although it seems like the WWE is using ECW to sell RAW instead of the other way around.
Winner – Angle

Michaelangelo McCullar: Hmm, this is a bit perplexing. On the one hand, you’d think Kurt should be the clear cut favorite here. On the other hand, he’s repping ECW now, and I’m still of the firm opinion that Vince will do for ECW what he did for WCW. Kill that f*cker dead.
Winner – Randy Orton

Sabu vs. John Cena – Extreme Lumberjack Match

PK: Can’t have Cena job cleanly, can you?
Winner – Sabu

Widro: I think Sabu wins as Cena continues to try to gain hardcore cred
Winner – Sabu

Matthew Michaels: So are there ECW lumberjacks, WWE lumberjacks, Spirit-jacks or what? My guess is the ECW and WWE lockerrooms will battle on the outside, evening things out, and that … SABU will get the win (although a “cheap” one) over the former 2-time WWE Champ.
Winner – The Genie

Vinny Truncellito: I doubt they’ll let Cena look anything but strong here. He’ll defy the odds, beat back the entire ECW roster (such as it is) and score one for the home team.
Winner – John Cena

Blatt: So Sabu’s lost a match to Cena already and had a no-contest with Rey? This doesn’t bode well for John Cena. Although I’m not too sure what the deal with Heyman cuddling with Sabu was all about, I think Sabu takes this one and we see John Cena start a slide downhill that will last a while.
Winner – Sabu

Michaelangelo McCullar: Cena’s still Vince’s golden boy, and I don’t see him losing to a pure ECW product.
Winner – Cena

D-Generation X vs. The Spirit Squad – 5 on 2 Handicap Match

PK: Is it wrong that I want X-Pac and the New Age Outlaws to show up and turn on DX?
Winners – DX

Widro: Ha!
Winner – DX

Matthew Michaels: Only question here is if the titles will be on the line, and here I am hoping they are…
Winners – Michaels and Helmsley

Vinny Truncellito: It seems obvious that DX should go over big time in this one, but the SS might sneak out with a cheap fluke victory, in order to give DX plenty of motivation to crank things up in the next few weeks. DX can get the big victory at SummerSlam.
Winner – The Spirit Squad

Blatt: come on.
Winner – DX

Michaelangelo McCullar: Yeah, like they’re gonna reform DX and have them lose their first match. Next.
Winner – DX Redux

Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley – 2 out of 3 Falls

PK: It’s really nice that they pulled the trigger on this feud 2 years after we cared. Who gains anything out of this? Both men have all the credibility and respect they need & deserve.
Winner – Flair

Widro: I think this will be surprisingly good
Winner – Flair

Matthew Michaels: Mick promised the worst match of his career, so I’m interested now: will he tank it “on purpose” or is he just lowering expectations. Either way, they’re in Flair Country, and the heat will be off the charts. A far cry from Foley/Carlito fer sure. My money’s on Foley winning the first fall, Flair the second two. But this is far from over.
Winner – Ric Flair

Vinny Truncellito: Can’t imagine where they plan to go from here. Wedding present for the Nature Boy, perhaps?
Winner – Ric Flair

Blatt: Man, I would have killed someone to see this match… if it was at Wrestlemania. Or Summerslam. Or the Survivor Series. Or the Royal Rumble. But Vengeance? And going immediately to two of three falls out of nowhere? Come on guys, I know that you’re old and can’t wrestle across country anymore, but you could at least put some effort in here and stretch this thing out before going to a non-traditional match. These are two guys that are LEGENDARY on the mic and they are only given two weeks of build-up here. Not only that, but Flair is the one who made the negative remarks on Foley’s career here and he’s the face in this situation. It’s very upsetting to me, I just don’t want to talk about it anymore.
Winner – No contest

Michaelangelo McCullar: Probably the best match on the card, as these two have real antipathy towards each other. Personally, I’m a bit surprised that they’re doing a two out of three falls match here, as this could have easily been milked until SummerSlam, but in the end I can’t see the part-timer (Ric Flair) losing to the even part-timer (Mick Foley).
Winner – Ric Flair

Shelton Benjamin (c) vs. Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito – Intercontinental Title

PK: How the hell did Nitro get an IC title shot? Shelton has had the belt since February, which means it’s time for his Summer Job to Carlito (just like last June, remember?)
Winner – Carlito

Widro: All three have looked good lately, including Nitro
Winner – Shelton

Matthew Michaels: I’d love for them to put the belt on Nitro here (three-way matches are always a great way to transition from heel to heel or face to face, without having to have two people the fans like/hate equally face off), but it simply wouldn’t make sense. Money’s on Carlito to take it, feud with Nitro, and Benjy to somehow end up back with Haas in one way, shape or form.
Winner – Carlito

Vinny Truncellito: As much as I’d love to see Nitro kick off a nice run here, I think Carlito will emerge victorious on this night.
Winner – Carlito

Blatt: It’s time to get a fresh face on the IC title. It’s also time for a “Your partner was a screw up and we had to move you to another show so here’s the IC title.”
Winner – Johnny Nitro

Michaelangelo McCullar: Shelton’s already had a couple nice reigns with the belt, but he’s not quite over enough yet to be able to function without it, as has been shown to be the case whenever he loses it and immediately plummets to curtain jerker. On the other hand, Carlito’s just about in the position where it’s about time for him to get a run with the belt. Tough one to call, but with SummerSlam around the corner…
Winner – Shelton Benjamin

Rob Van Dam (c) vs. Edge – WWE Championship

PK: RVD has had his day (or 2 weeks) in the sun. Sure, he’ll lose the WWE title, but he will still be the reigning ECW Champ.
Winner – Edge

Widro: I see some kind of disputed finish allowing Edge to win and RVD to continue to claim to be ECW champion
Winner – Edge

Matthew Michaels: I think I know the result, but how will they do it? You can’t have Edge a tainted WWE Champ, and you can’t have RVD a meaningless ECW Champ if you want both ‘brands’ to succeed. Well, actually you CAN have Edge’s title tainted, since he’s a heel and all… Whatever the means, at the end, we’ll see RVD with one less belt, but not title-less. Perhaps both an ECW and RAW ref get involved and things go that way. (Personally they should have just made this a ladder match with both belts hanging above the ring, and do things that way, but whatev.) Let’s see how creative they can be here.
Winner – Edge wins WWE Title; RVD retains ECW Title… somehow

Vinny Truncellito: Since they didn’t actually “rechristen” the WWE title as the ECW title (they simply added the ECW title to RVD’s other shoulder), RVD can drop the spinner belt back to RAW and still be the ECW World Heavyweight Champion with a quick promo explanation on SciFi two nights later. Plus, RVD pinned Edge following a 5-Star Frog Splash on Tuesday night, so according to Pro Wrestling 101, Edge gets the duke and the bling-belt.
Winner – Edge

Blatt: Ugh. I’m not looking forward to having RVD lose this title to Edge. Or anyone for that matter. I think he’s gonna lose it to end this inter-promotional stuff that’s been going on and perhaps letting ECW be ECW and not RAW Jr.
Winner – Edge

Michaelangelo McCullar: You knew Rob was only going to have the belt for so long before he dropped it. I think it’s a bit surprising it’s Edge and not Cena, but consider it a makeup for his ridiculously short reign back in January.
Winner – Edge