Announcers are Joey Styles & Tazz
By: John Cavanagh
Here we are again for another ECW show. No time is wasted with Styles welcoming us to the show and just like last week we open up with a match. Sabu gets half an entrance with Roadkill already in the ring.
Sabu vs. Roadkill
Sabu is curtain jerker again? He’s been busy non stop since the return of ECW and still no main event match? That’s just cold. He quickly gets tha Camel Clutch locked in but Roadkill gets to the ropes. Sabu whips him in to the corner and hits a tornado DDT off the ropes. Goes to the outside to get a chair and sets up the triple jump moonsault. Roadkill grabs his lag while he’s running sending Sabu face first in to the chair. Goes for the cover and gets a two. He hits Sabu with the Barn Burner, and again gets a two count. Roadkill goes to the outside to get a table while Sabu sets the chair up against the rope for a jump to the outside that ends in him falling head first on the mats. Roadkill gets him back in the ring and sets up an elbow drop in the corner and gets another two after Sabu gets his hand on the ropes. Roadkill has Sabu setup on the table in the ring and climbs up on the ring post but Sabu hits him with the chair and then lands a hurricanranna off the top rope. Roadkill now dazed leaning over the table with Sabu hitting the atomic Arabian face buster with the steel chair. Sabu locks in the camel clutch but Roadkill still won’t tap. Sabu gets up and grabs the chair and sets it up on Roadkill’s back again locking in the Camel Clutch with Roadkill tapping.
Winner: Sabu
Styles and Tazz tell us the main event tonight will be RVD vs. Kurt Angle
Commercials.
Another Vampire sighting outside the arena. Where’s the Monster Squad when you need them?
Tommy Dreamer is in the ring saying that he has a lot more respect for the Big Show after last week’s beating. So all he has to say is, “Thank you sir, may I have another.” He waits in the ring for Show to come down to the ring. Doesn’t take long for Show to make his way out and when he gets in to the ring Tommy charges right at him but Show pushes him down to the canvas. Show hits three headbutts on Dreamer but Tommy still fights back. Show then brings Dreamer to the middle of the ring and hits three body slams. Big Show locks in and hits his new back breaker finisher then tosses Dreamer across the ring.
We cut to the back and see Mike Knox, the guy who interrupted Kelly last week, talking to Kelly. He says he loves to watch her dance but only when it’s just him, he tells her if she wants to be in public so bad she can be in his corner tonight. She accepts and they walk away.
Commercials.
We’re back and Kurt Angle introduces himself for the two people who may not know who he is. He tells us that tonight he faces Rob Van Dam and if he beats him that he earns the right to compete for the WWE championship at Saturday Night Main Event. Kurt says that every day since April 2nd has been a failure because that was the last day he held a championship belt. That it eats at him because he KNOWS that he’s a champion and the best that this business has seen. He tells us that if he has to put RVD through agonizing pain to get back to that top spot then so be it. Failure is not an option, not when your name is Kurt Angle.
Mike Knox w/ Kelly vs. Danny Doring
The match starts with Knox overpowering Doring. Know hits a sit down spine buster for a two. We see Kelly on the outside and she begins interacting with a fan. She offers the fan to unhook her bra but Knox runs to the outside and knocks the fan down. Knox covers her up and puts her back in the corner and gets back in the ring. Doring takes advantage of the situation but quickly gets a boot to the face. Knox hits his finisher and gets the pin fall.
Winner: Mike Knox
Knox looks for Kelly but she’s managed to find her way back to the stripper platform near the entrance.
Commercials.
Test promo again. Hurray for wasted space?
Tazz and Styles recap the match but only cover all of the things surrounding Kelly.
Which segues in to the “Kelly’s Expose” routine. Kelly seems to be having trouble doing the dance routine and strip teasing at the same time. She goes for the bra and Knox gives her a towel, but she throws it back at him and continues dancing. Knox pushes for the towel again and forces her to the back.
Out comes what looks like the fat male stripper from the RAW episode a few weeks back, dressed in Ric Flair’s robe. He’s on the mic telling the audience to lock up their wives. Styles says that he’d love to run for his life and his sanity, Tazz says he saw the same guy leaving Michael Coles’ hotel room. The guy begins dancing in the ring. Sandman’s music hits and our squash match of the night is under way.
Sandman gets to the ring relatively fast but actually allows the dancer to dance and gets a kick out of it. Until he takes Sandman’s beer and wastes it by pouring it on himself. Not the best move. Sandman canes him in the crotch, the head then in the ass to the outside through the bottom rope. Sandman celebrates his… win… in the ring. And he appears to be getting in better shape each and every week we see him.
Heyman’s in the back giving RVD a pep talk, telling him that if Angle wins tonight that the main event at SNME will become a four way between Rob, Kurt, Cena and Edge. RVD tells him that he understands and then we cut the Edge walking through the audience at takes two front row seats for himself and Lita.
Commercials.
Tazz is interviewing Edge on the outside of the barricade and tells him he has no right being here and demands to know what he plans to do. Edge tells him he’s the Rated R Superstar and can do whatever he wants whenever he wants. He makes fun of Tazz’s height and says he knows how to choke people out too. Then tells the audience that he’s the whole f’n show.
Rob Van Dam vs. Kurt Angle
Angle quickly begins to do his new mat wrestling style on RVD but Van Dam manages to slid out of every move Angle tries to apply. The two get in to the corner and Angle begins hitting Van Dam with a few upper cuts. RVD gets a boost and hits his monkey flip launching Angle across the ring. Angle locks in a few holds while a very large, very audible “We Want Cena” chant starts. Van Dam hits the windmill kick and then tries to capitalize by going to the top rope, but Kurt pushes him to the outside.
Commercials.
We’re back and Angle has Vand Dam in another rest hold in the ring. RVD begins to fight through it and gets a jawbreaker on Kurt breaking the hold. Both men are up and Angle hits a mean belly to belly suplex. Kurt lands a back breaker on Rob and gets a two count. Kurt has Van Dan on the ground and tries to get a half nelson on Rob. RVD gets out yet again, but before he can pick up any steam Angle hits a German suplex and then applies a modified camel clutch. RVD again gets in to a vertical position and breaks the hold. The two men trade a few forearms and Rob still has trouble getting the upper hand in the match. Angle hits a high cradle suplex right on the RVD’s neck but still cant get a three. Both men are up and Kurt flips Van Dam in mid air with a belly to back suplex, again only getting a two. Kurt goes for the ankle lock but Rob rolls out of it followed by a kick to Angle’s jaw with Van Dam attempting a pin but only getting a two.
Van Dam goes up top for the frog splash but Kurt is up so he switches to a side kick but Angle grabs him mid air locking in the ankle lock! RVD gets to the ropes but Kurt isn’t letting go, dragging him back to the middle of the ring. Rob lunges for the ropes with his momentum launching Angle to the outside through the middle rope. Van Dam goes outside and rolls him back in to the ring, hitting a leg drop over the top rope and goes for a pin but comes up short. Angle goes for the inside cradle but again can’t get a three. Van Dam goes for rolling thunder but Kurt gets out of the way and again tries to applies the ankle lock on RVD. Rob gets out of it with a few kicks to the side of Kurt’s head. RVD tries to capitalize again with a split legged moonsault out of nowhere but still only gets a two. Rob tries to get the Five Star again but Kurt runs up and hits a suplex off the top rope and still cant get the pin. Kurt goes for the Olympic slam but Van Dam counters it in to a DDT, he goes for the top rope again finally hitting the Five Star Frog Splash and pulls out the victory.
Winner: Rob Van Dam
We see Edge begin to walk away clapping for RVD but then he storms the ring connecting the spear on Van Dam. Edge celebrates in the ring while Rob is left motionless in the middle of the ring.
Show Over.
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