[JunkNewsflash!] Transcript of RVD/Sabu/John Laurinaitis Meeting!

Insidepulse has obtained the chat transcript from the meeting held on Monday afternoon between Head of WWE Talent Relations John Laurinaitis, RVD and Sabu after last night’s drug citation.

John: Hey Rob! Hi Sabu!

Sabu: Johnny! WAZZUP?

Rob: Shut up! Hi John. First of all…

John: Hey, I see you’re still carrying both title belts.

Rob: Yeah, look…

John: I hope you’re getting a lot of pictures taken today of you holding both title belts. Hell, get individual photos taken also.

Rob: I know what has to happen, but in my defense…

Sabu: WAZZUP? You remember that from the beer commercial? WAZZUP?

John: That’s hilarious! You should definitely incorporate that into your character on TNA or ROH or where ever you wind up.

Sabu: I’ll tell them you say so. Man, I am so high right now.

Rob: SHUT UP SABU! Look, we have difficult decisions to make, I know you’re not in the easiest position…

John: John Cena, ECW champion. I think it has a nice ring to it. And he can feud with The Big Show!

Rob: But then…

John: Oh! I didn’t realize you had something to add! Please, please, add something to what I just said.

Silence. Sabu is heard laughing.

Sabu: Yo, my favorite part of the John Cena theme song is when he says he brushes your mouth like Colgate. Colgate doesn’t brush you mouth! You put Colgate on a toothbrush and then you brush your own mouth.

John: I’m not a big rap fan myself. There’s one song I love though! “Rob was gonna be the champ, but then he got high. Rob was gonna make a million bucks a year, but then he got high. Now Rob’s selling comics every day, and I know why!”

Sabu: Why?

John: “Because Rob got high, because Rob got high, because Rob got high!”

Rob: John, please…

Sabu: That was awesome! How about we all blow each other?

John: I’m down. Rob?

Crying is heard, followed by slurping.

Insidepulse will have more on this story as RVD’s life is ripped apart by a small bag of weed.