[JunkNewsflash!] Transcript of RVD/Sabu/John Laurinaitis Meeting!

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Insidepulse has obtained the chat transcript from the meeting held on Monday afternoon between Head of WWE Talent Relations John Laurinaitis, RVD and Sabu after last night’s drug citation.

John: Hey Rob! Hi Sabu!

Sabu: Johnny! WAZZUP?

Rob: Shut up! Hi John. First of all…

John: Hey, I see you’re still carrying both title belts.

Rob: Yeah, look…

John: I hope you’re getting a lot of pictures taken today of you holding both title belts. Hell, get individual photos taken also.

Rob: I know what has to happen, but in my defense…

Sabu: WAZZUP? You remember that from the beer commercial? WAZZUP?

John: That’s hilarious! You should definitely incorporate that into your character on TNA or ROH or where ever you wind up.

Sabu: I’ll tell them you say so. Man, I am so high right now.

Rob: SHUT UP SABU! Look, we have difficult decisions to make, I know you’re not in the easiest position…

John: John Cena, ECW champion. I think it has a nice ring to it. And he can feud with The Big Show!

Rob: But then…

John: Oh! I didn’t realize you had something to add! Please, please, add something to what I just said.

Silence. Sabu is heard laughing.

Sabu: Yo, my favorite part of the John Cena theme song is when he says he brushes your mouth like Colgate. Colgate doesn’t brush you mouth! You put Colgate on a toothbrush and then you brush your own mouth.

John: I’m not a big rap fan myself. There’s one song I love though! “Rob was gonna be the champ, but then he got high. Rob was gonna make a million bucks a year, but then he got high. Now Rob’s selling comics every day, and I know why!”

Sabu: Why?

John: “Because Rob got high, because Rob got high, because Rob got high!”

Rob: John, please…

Sabu: That was awesome! How about we all blow each other?

John: I’m down. Rob?

Crying is heard, followed by slurping.

Insidepulse will have more on this story as RVD’s life is ripped apart by a small bag of weed.