Up and (Smack)Down”¦
Plus, check out the IP staffers’ results from the No Mercy
Rasslin Roundtable!
Yin and yang. Good and bad. Ups and downs. One step forward, two steps back. The theme of WWE’s Friday Night SmackDown! lately has been a little positive, followed by a little negative, over and over again.
TODAY’S ISSUE: The Ups and Downs of SmackDown!
I’ve have a hard time enjoying any given episode of SmackDown! recently, because the show consistently slips back and forth between exciting, entertaining stuff and total garbage. Here are a few examples:
Good: Tag Team Title Scene. Three tag teams have stolen the spotlight as of late. The WWF tag team champions The Hooliganz, The Pit Bulls, and newcomers KC James and Idol Stevens have brought back some excitement to the tag title picture. It’s unfortunate that David “Kid Kash” Cash was released, as I would have thought combinations of these three teams could have successfully feuded over the tag straps at least through to the Royal Rumble in January of 2007.
Michelle McCool’s new tandem met The Hooliganz at the No Mercy ppv on October 9th, and it seems this feud is just getting heated up. Hopefully we’ll see a lot more of this battle before it’s all said and done.
Bad: Montel Vontavious Porter. Attention, WWE Creative Department: you can’t just CREATE a hot free agent because you want to. Kurt Angle was a hot free agent, my friends. Christian’s jump to TNA was another example of a hot free agent jumping to the opposition. Goldberg, Chris Jericho, and The Rock are hot free agents on the market right now. The casual fan had never even heard of MVP when he started demanding a huge contract for his wrestling services. As DX would say, I’ve got just two words for MVP: get bent.
Good: Hardy/Helms Feud. These two OMEGA originals have great chemistry, and have been entertaining to the extreme. Hopefully they’ll continue to provide us with solid wrestling matches for weeks to come, as I could stand a 15-minute performance from these two every week, whether in singles or tag team affairs. I’m sure Helms will be seeking revenge for the loss he suffered in his hometown at No Mercy this Friday night.
Bad: Vito’s dress. If the Vito character enjoys wearing a dress, I say good for him. I have no opinion about that as far as personal taste is concerned. The problem I have is with him wearing it IN THE RING! I can’t understand why he wears a dress to wrestle. I hate when a wrestler infuses far more of his character’s personality into his ring gear than is logical.
Do you remember the “Real Man’s Man” William Regal wearing flannel and a hard-hat to the ring while carrying an axe, or Isaac Yankem in his stupid dental scrubs? What’s wrong with wearing regular wrestling gear to the ring, and leaving your gimmick-driven attire for the promos? I love to wear slacks and a dress shirt to a restaurant or the movies, but I never dress like that when I play softball. Why? It’s simply not practical. Neither is wearing a dress to wrestle. Once again, “Mr. Subtlety” himself Vince McMahon has missed the mark. They should have Vito wear the dress in backstage vignettes, and wear wrestling attire to the ring. His opponents will still be freaked out enough to respond to the gimmick if it’s all played properly.
Good: Mysterio vs. Guererro. Unlike the “Who’s Your Papi?” feud between Rey and Chavo’s late uncle Eddie, this war feels more “real”, more intense, and is easier for me to sink my teeth into. I’m enjoying the fire Rey’s shown lately, and it actually makes me care about his character far more than his weak “underdog champion” shtick from earlier in the year. This is another feud I could stand more of. I saw the 2-for-1 ppv hard sell tag match between Rey and Matt Hardy against Chavo and Gregory Helms coming from a mile away, but it served it’s purpose storyline-wise and, equally as important, was a solid in-ring effort to boot.
Bad: Jimmy Wang Yang. Here’s another stupid character with a rich heritage. See, there have been loads of dumb ideas in WWF/E over the years, and Jimmy Yang’s new Asian/Redneck character is just the next in that long line. It’s ill conceived, silly and NOT as clever, witty, ironic or funny as Vinnie Mac must think. Looks like an Asian, talks and dresses like a redneck? Comedy GOLD!
Good: King Booker has stepped up his game. The King actually dragged a reasonably watchable match out of the Undertaker a few weeks ago, which is a miracle considering Undertaker’s best days are long behind him. Booker’s camp performances as royalty are so far over the top that they come back around again to entertaining. I’m so pleased to see Booker rewarded with the world title in what might turn out to be his last run at the top of the card. All Hail King Booker!
Bad: Crystal, Ashley, etc. and their little attitudes. Rarely has a segment of a two-hour show been more wasted than when Crystal Marshall is venting her angst about not winning the Diva Search. There aren’t big enough capital letters to express my lack of interest in Crystal’s feelings when I type: WHO CARES?! Ashley is not entertaining in my book, and since she’s already bared it all in Playboy, the idea of seeing her in skimpy clothes or lingerie does nothing for me. Learn to work in the ring like Trish Stratus, or get off my television screen.
Good: Speaking of the King, his Court is simply excellent. Anything involving Sir Finlay and/or Sir William is sure to be entertaining. Simply put, these veterans don’t wrestle bad matches at this stage in their careers, and their respective “British bruiser” and “Irish tough guy” characters are straightforward and effective. Regal and Finlay play their parts to perfection. Notice when Finlay asked Regal about challenging the King in the “Pick Your Poison” match last week. Regal looked at his watch and fled the scene so as not to have to show any sign of disobedience or disloyalty to His Majesty. Perfectly acted. Solid in-ring performance + well-defined, well-performed characters = great wrestling television, folks.
I think the following sums up the current state of the union on Friday Nights: SmackDown! is a show where a hot, young, up-and-coming stud like Mr. Kennedy has to act terrified when the big, slow, clumsy Undertaker hobbles to the ring on his bad knees, his best years far behind him. At this point, the Undertaker should use his fading celebrity to “make” Kennedy. Instead, he only loses at No Mercy due to shenanigans, then gets to obliterate both Kennedy and referee Charles “Lil’ Naitch” Robinson, just to show everybody he’s still the big dog in the yard.
See? One step forward, two steps back. Even now, the Undertaker’s ego is one of the most important things to consider when booking a SmackDown! program, rather than the good of the company or the future stars ‘Taker could create if he were so inclined. I’m sure you recall how well the youngest world champ in WWE history, Randy Orton, fared in HIS feud with the Undertaker.
Speaking of No Mercy, how did our very own Inside Pulse staffers fare with their predictions? First, check out The Rasslin Roundtable. Next, compare our picks to the actual show. Finally, look below for the “box scores” plus our overall standings since SummerSlam.
IP Staff Rasslin Roundtable Results
CJ Ambrosia
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 4-3 TIE for first.
Total: 4-3
Jeremy Lambert
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 4-3 TIE for first.
Total: 8-6
Danny Wallace
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 4-3 TIE for first.
Total: 15-10
Vinny Truncellito
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 4-3 TIE for first.
Total: 17-11
PK
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 3-4
Total: 7-7
Iain Burnside
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 3-4
Total: 9-13
Troy Hepple
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 3-4
Total: 7-7
Mark Neeley
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 3-4
Total: 6-8
Matthew Michaels
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 3-4
Total: 17-11
Eric Szulczewski
SmackDown No Mercy (8 Oct 06): 1-6
Total: 13-15
We now return you to your regularly scheduled reality.
p.s. — Thought to ponder: life is sexually transmitted.
