Pulse Wrestling’s TNA Bound for Glory Live Report

PPVs

Hi all. Yes, it’s the Bright Side guy, working Sundays now. PK’s not available, and since I happened to be back home earlier than I expected, I decided to hop in.

Oh, by the way – after the ending of today’s Eagles game, you should expect significantly less positivity from me than normal.

Hey, the Fozzy song doesn’t suck. Well, color me surprised.

Impressive rundown of the card – not quite WWE Wrestlemania level, but not bad at all. I’m not sure hiring the guy who does voiceovers for movie previews was the best idea, but hey – whatever works for them.

Kevin Nash Open Invitation X-Division Gauntet Battle Royal: And no, I’m not typing that monstrosity again. And Nash is rocking the suit today – who does he think he is, Batista? And we get the added bonus of Nash joining the commentary booth – well, this should be fun.

We start off with Austin Starr (a “cocky son of a gun”, according to Mike Tenay) and Sonjay Dutt. Basic rules: a new competitor every minute (1 minute? wow, that’s going to get crowded), elimination over the top rope. Final two competitors decide it by pinfall or submission. We start with some nice flippy-floopy, including Starr pulling off a backelbow after jumping over the top rope (weird visual), and Dutt completely blowing an attempted hurricanrana (at least, that’s what I think he was trying). Next we get “Maverick Matt” – he and Starr do some double-teams on Dutt, finally counted with a second-rope double clothesline. Jay Lethal is next, and immediately goes to work on Starr. And then we start testing the limits of the defintion of “X-Division”, as A1 makes his way to the ring – and throws a HUGE spinebuster on Lethal. (Followed-up immediately by a “You can’t wrestle” chant – nice.) Curveball next with the announcement of the one-legged wonder, Zach Gowan. Good one-legged moonsault on Dutt, which he gets to celebrate for about 2 seconds before Star takes his head off with a lariat. Kazarian is next, and he gets the first elimination, after he and Matt throw Dutt out. Another surprise as Sirelda enters (the big amazon who was with Styles and Daniels for a couple of week), and is immediately bitch-slapped by Kazarian. Okay, that’s wrong – but really, really funny. She gets her revenge with a sideslam, but gets chopped by Starr. However, her return chop is pretty damn nasty – Starr sells it like a champ. She get a full-nelson, countered with a low blow. Wait – WHAT?!? Hell, even Tenay remarks that it shouldn’t have much effect – but we don’t have a lot of time to consider it, since A1 brutally clotheslines her over the top rope to the floor. Wow – he almost took himself out of the ring with his own momentum. Ah – so much for “almost” – Matt and Kazarian knock him out next. Shark Boy (Nash: “my odds-on favorite) enters next. Alex Shelly finally makes his way down – but wait, he’s not last? Okay, surprising. He spits water in Kazarian’s face, much to the delight of the crowd. Gowan is almost elimated (wait, since “both of the competitor’s feet have to hit the floor to be eliminated, shoudln’t that be technically impossible with Gowan?). And our final twist, with the entrance of D-Ray 3000. Okay – didn’t call that one either. Shark Boy and D-Ray have a touching reunion, and pull the Fro Ram (oh wow, that’s wrong too) on all of the standing competitors. Hey, Shark Boy and D-Ray toss Matt over the top! Good for them! Johnny Devine runs in, and eliminates Gowan (guess that answers my previous question). Another entrance? My God – is this match ever going to end? (Shelley is getting the loudest chants, btw.) Elix Skipper is next, and goes right after Lethal with a clotheslilne, then hits Devine with a moonsault (and follows that impressive sequence by falling off the turnbuckle – HA). Kazarian gets pushed off the top rope by Starr. Comedy spot alert – Short Sleeve Sampson (with encouragement from Slick Johnson) enters, and hits a headbutt to the groin on Starr. Somehow, Shark Boy is eliminated – and might actually be dead. Norman Smiley in da hizzie! (Somewhere, Eric S. is smiling.) And he’s wearing a Plymouth Whalers jersey – nice touch, Nor-MAN. Smiley pulls the Big Wiggle on Starr (whose facial expression is priceless), while Sampon does the same to Devine. Shelley picks up Sampson and tosses him over the top, right onto a recovering Shark Boy. Sampson chases Slick Johnson into the ring – so Johnson decides to take advantage of the “Open Invitation” part of the title, and tosses both Skipper and Smiley out. And, of course, he’s immediately elimated right after that by the newest, and last entrant, Petey Williams. Petey’s attempt at the Canadian Destroyer on Shelley is broken up by Devine, so Petey pulls it on Lethal instead. The crowd approves. It’s short-lived, however, as Williams is then tossed over the top by Shelley and Divine.

Final Four: Jay Lethal, Johhny Devine, Alex Shelley, and Austin Starr

That lasts for about 5 seconds before Devine is tossed by Starr. Shelley takes offense, but gets backdropped over the top by Starr soon after (damn, he was my pick in the roundtable). So we have our final two: Starr vs. Lethal. Lethal gets the first two-count, but gets knocked off the turnbuckle, and hit a truly vicious brain-buster, which gets the 1-2-3.

Winner: Austin Starr

Nash enters the ring to present the “big bowling trophy” to Starr, which brings about a rather jealous reaction from Shelley.

A quick recap of the issues between LAX and America’s Most Wanted, culminating with Hernandez hitting the Border Zone on Gail Kim. Impressive visual, but a bit sick, especially if the rumors of Kim actually being hurt by that. Borash interviews AMW backstage, who promise to get revenge.

Shane Douglas comes to the ring, and introduces The “newly franchised” Naturals, which brings us to our next match:

The Naturals vs. The James Gang vs. Team 3-D vs. America’s Most Wanted: BG does his schtick, AMW comes to the ring without incident, and Brother Ray is wearing a ridiculous looking bandana. Crowd starts up a “3-D” chant, which Ray changes to a “Tables” chant. The announcers spend the first two minutes of the match ignoring the action in the ring, and talking instead about Team 3-D. (Feeling better about that Roundtable pick already.) BG and Ray have some fun, pulling a double Flip-Flop-and-Fly on AMW, which the crowd enjoys. They then knock each other down with stereo punches, so Kip and D-Von run in and take each other out. Very cool looking quadruple power-bomb/superplex Tower of Doom out of the corner with The Naturals and AMW – “TNA!” Quick sequence of finishing- and near-finishing moves from every competitor, culminating with a 2-count from Stevens onto Ray. Team 3-D hits the Doomsday Device on Stevens, then the Wazzup on Douglas, while AMW and the James Gang fight on the floor. “D-Von – get the tables!” gets broken up by a double dropkick by Stevens. The Natural Disaster only gets a 2-count. Douglas hits high-knee to his own parter, and the 3-D wins it.

Winner: Team 3-D

Post-match, Shane Douglas yells at and slaps around The Naturals.

Backstage, Borash is standing outside Samoa Joe’s locker, when Jake Roberts sneaks up on him. Jake cuts a mostly imcomprehensive promo – he honestly might be drunk.

Video recap of The Monster’s Ball.

The Monster’s Ball – Abyss vs. Brother Runt vs. Raven vs. Samoa Joe: Looks like Runt has almost completely finished his transformation into Travis Bickle. Raven goes medieval on our ass, with some sort of metal cage wrapped around his head (how does he see in that thing?). Samoa Joe enters with tape covering the cut opened up by Angle on Impact. The three Grievous Bodily Harm (tm Eric) members gang up on Joe from the get-go. Runt is the first one to seek out weapons, tossing in a chair, which Raven drop-toe-holds Abyss into. Joe returns and cleans house on Raven, with an enzuiguri, and an attempted face-wash – interrupted by a chokeslam from Abyss. Abyss his a clothesline on Raven, and tosses Run about 14 feet into the air. Abyss tosses Runt into the crowd – but instead of crowd-surfing him, they toss him back over the railing. Joe hits a tope onto the other 3 outside the ring, and managed to land on his feet! Raven finally decides to use his mask as a weapon on Joe, as they head up the ramp. Joe falls off the ramp, through a table about 8 feet below. Meanwhile, Abyss tosses Runt off the scaffolding, and then drops an elbow onto him – killing him dead. Abyss carries Runt back to the ring, but the pin attempt is broken up by Raven. Joe finally makes his way back to the ring, and takes out the other two standing participants. Joe misses a running swanton, but stops a chairchot with a side kick to the groin. Joe hits a powerslam on Abyss onto the chair, but the pinfall is again broken up by Raven. Mitchell hands Abyss the bag of tacks, which Jake counters by carrying in Damien’s bag. Raven stops Jake from opening it, and Abyss finally pours out the tacks. Abyss goes for the Black Hole Slam, but Joe pulls down the middle rope and sends Raven to the floor. Joe hits a running senton on a kneeling Abyss – sending him FACE FIRST into the tacks. Oh, that was SICK. Joe gets the rear naked choke on Abyss, broken up by a chairshot from Raven. Joe shrugs it off, and reapplies the choke – so Raven hits him again. Raven goes for a third chairshot, stopped by Jake – who hits the DDT on Raven! (The crowd goes nuts.) Muscle Buster by Joe, 1-2-3.

Winner – Samoa Joe

Post-match, Jake lays Damien on Raven – who freaks out.

Eric Young is breathing into a paper bag backstage, who gets interviewed by Borash. Borash tries to gives Young some confidence, which is broken up by Zybysko, who calls Eric “insecure”.

Eric Young vs. Larry Zybysko – Loser Gets Fired: Eric has some run beforehand doing the “Yay! Boo!” routine with the crowd. A “Fire Larry!” chant gets started, which allows Zybysko to stall a bit. Man, Larry looks bad. Zybysko puts Young into the Abdominal Stretch, which Eric reverses – so Larry hits the ref in the eye. That backfires, as Young hits Zybysko with a low blow, then hits Larry with some sort of brass knucks. Ref recovers, and that’s the match. Short but harmless, and the crowd is happy.

Winner – Eric Young

Eric exits through the crowd, with a couple dozen fans marching behind him, doing the “Don’t Fire Eric” motions.

Video montage on Senshi, including a whole bunch of Mortal Kombat scenes. Ummm…. ok.

Jim Cornette comes down to the ring with a mic. And Jim’s voice is GONE – he’s “sick as a dog”, using his own words. Cornette announces that Samoa Joe will be removed from the TNA roster if he interferes in the title match tonight. This brings out Angle – btw, I love his new music, which is just a rif on “Lunatic Fringe”, which was featured in the greatest movie ever made about amatuer wrestling, Vision Quest. Angle: “TNA is the best! Screw the rest! You know who I’m talking about.” No, Kurt, really – who? Angle promises to call the TNA title match down the middle, and talks about how he “punked out” Joe. Of course, that starts up Joe’s music, who runs down to the ring. Security seperates them – the crowd is pissed.

Video montage for the X-Division Championship.

Senshi vs. Chris Sabin – X-Division Championship: The crowd reaction for “the hometown boy” Sabin is a bit less than I expected. Collar-and-elbow lockup goes around the ring, and ends in a draw. Senshi goes to the kicks, and badmouths Sabin. (Okay, is anyone able to imagine Senshi looking happy? I’m just trying to think about this guy telling a dirty joke – and it seems impossible.) Sabin counters with a roll-up for 2, and a low dropkick. Senshi lands on his feet out of a reversed German (nice), and takes out Sabin with a kick to the head. Good, stiff back-and-forth, with Senshi getting the majority of the chants. Chopping contest gets won by Sabin, much to my surprise. Senshi hits an impressive heel kick in the corner, but gets caught by a missile dropkick, gets tossed, and gets hit by a suicide dive on the floor. Sabin hits the hesitation dropkick, but only gets a 2. Senshi goes for a cartwheel kick, but Sabin catches him with a low dropkick into the ribs (don’t see that everyday). Tornado DDT gets 2. Sabin hits a 2nd rope hurricanrana, flipped over by Senshi, into The Warrior’s Way (with Sabin having his arms crossed on his chest). Only a 2-count. 2nd-rope roundhouse gets a 2-count. Senshi misses a blind charge, and Sabin catches him a viscious running kick to the mouth. Sabin hits the Cradle Shock… 1-2-kick out?? The crowd really thought that was it. Sabin attemps a 2nd rope Cradle Shock, but it’s countered with some stiff kicks. Senshi dropkicks him into the corner, and hits the most brutal Warrior’s Way I’ve seen. 1-2-.. foot on the rope! Sabin fights out of a submission move, gets a roll-up – 1-2-3!

Winner, and new X-Division Champion: Chris Sabin

Wow. The build-up was slow, but that was a helluva match. Post-match, Sabin is congratulated by Sonjay Dutt, Jay Lethal, and Jerry Lynn.

Borash hypes the 8 Mile Street File, but is interrupted by Christian Cage. Christian runs down Rhino, and the entire city of Detroit. He even insults Rhino’s Aunt’s cooking – now, that’s just uncalled for.

Christian Cage vs. Rhino – 8 Mile Street Fight: We start backstage, following Cage to the ring. Rhino enters through the crowd, soaking up the adulation, then… goes backstage? Oh, they’re going to start outside? Ah, I see – they’re inside a circle of cars. Hey, didn’t I see this in a Jean Claude Van Dam movie once? Christian gets tossed into a variety of immovable objects. finally getting thrown back inside. They fight in some poorly-lit areas, until Christian gets thrown on top of a Zamboni – which Rhino decides to drive into the area (and sets off the horn while climbing out of it – nice touch). Christian finally comes back with an eye gouge, but is countered trying to use one of the street lamps ringside (don’t ask), and gets nailed with it in return. Rhino goes looking for plunder (my favorite Dustyism), and just grabs some ringside seats that the fans hand him (okay, that was cool – very old-school ECW-esque). Rhino goes for the GOREGOREGORE, but takes a chairshot (anyone who didn’t see that one coming – just stop reading, ok?). Christian does some damage outside the ring but gets slammed into, and then thrown over, the railing. They fight into the crowd, then back ringside – where Rhino pulls out 2 tables. Christian gets a roll-up, then smacks Rhino with the “8 MILE ROAD” sign – then spits on it. Okay, that was clever. Christian throws a ladder into the ring, and lays some punches onto Rhino – who’s openned up a HUGE gash in his forehead. Christian goes for a shot with the ladder, but Rhino gets a drop-toe hold. Rhino lays Christian on the ladder, goes for a splash, but misses. Christian hits the Unprettier – but only a 2-count. Ladder shot to the head, and Christian goes outside – but seems to almost slide under the apron, and is doing… something down there. He pulls in a steel chair – and a straight-jacket? Well, that seems… I don’t think “contrived” is a strong enough word. Sure, neat concept – but Rhino has to fully participate in getting it on himself, which kinda ruins the moment. Eh. Christian sets up for the Con-chairto, but misses. Rhino (still in the straight-jacket), gets two kicks and a headbutt to the groin, then asks the ref to get him out of the straight-jacket – which the crowd.. boos? Well, hey – good for them. If he wanted to get out, he should have done it like Martin Riggs. Rhino gets the crowd back on his side by giving Christian a piledriver from the apron, through the table on the floor. Holy crap. Christian gets his foot on the ropes during the pinfall. Rhino goes for teh GOREGOREGORE through the table, but Christian counters. Only a 2-count. A second Unprettier, onto a chair, 1-2-…kick out? Oh man – even I thought that was the end. Christian piles everything he can find onto Rhino’s head, grabs a chair – and slams the living shit out of.. .well, mostly out of the ladder, to be honest. 1-2-3. Huh.

Winner – Christian Cage

Backstage, Borash interviews LAX. Konnan: “To live and die in LAX, it takes a nation of millions to hold us back, and a company full of racists to hold us down. But no longer!”

Video montage of the Styles and Daniels vs. LAX feud. Damn, but these guys have spilled some serious blood in the last couple of months.

The announce team delays while the cage is being built.

A.J. Styles & Christopher Daniels vs. LAX – NWA Tag Team Championships: Don West informs us that Styles and Daniels have, combined, held 19 titles in TNA. We start with Daniels vs. Homicide, and Styles vs. Hernandez. They go into a typical tag-team format from there, with one partner each outside the ropes – ummm, why? Aren’t there no-DQ’s in a cage? Styles hits a dropkick on Homicide that can probably be heard back in Orlando. Styles takes the first hit into the cage, diving after Homicide. Hernandez comes in, and tosses Styles between the ropes into the cage. Daniels comes in and take a nasty lariat from Hernandez. I should add that Joel Hebner is making no attempts to get anybody back outside the ropes – which maybe both tames should take note of. Hernandez hits an electric chair on Daniels, followed by a top-rope elbow by Homicide. Styles has been busted open. Konnan hands Homicide a fork through the cage, which is used on Daniels’ head to bust him open too. (Tenay makes an “Abdullah the Butcher” reference, which I appreciate.) Hernandez catches Daniels on a cross-body, and powerslams him first into the cage, and then to the mat. Styles breaks up the pin attempt. In a move I’ve never seen before, Homicide spits a mouthful of tequila onto Daniels – and then pours some of the bottle onto his head. They both climb to the top rope, where Daniels hits a big hip-toss. (“TNA!” chant.) Styles gets tagged in and hits a 2nd-rope inverted DDT on Homicide, then a top-rope flying forearm onto Hernandez. Daniels comes to, and hits a backdrop/clothesline combo on Homicide. Styles and Daniels then flapjack Hernandez into the cage face-first (Hernandez digs for his razor blade right on camera). Styles and Daniels hit the Hi/Lo on Homicide. They hit a high running knee and dropkick on Hernandez, then pull the cheese-grater on his head – but he never was able to blade before, so the visual isn’t near what it could have been. Daniels finds the fork, so he and Styles take turns using it on Homicide – until it’s broken up by Hernandez (still not bleeding – pussy). Whole bunch of big moves by each participant follows – ending with Styles hitting the Pele on Hernandez. Styles starts to climb out of the cage. They line up a Tower of Doom, with Styles over the top of the cage, Homicide grabbing him, Daniels getting a waistlock on Homcide, and Hernandez trying to powerbomb Daniels. 3 guys go through with it – Styles is still up-top, actually outside the cage. But he climbs back up, and hits a splash from the top of the cage onto Hernandez! 1-2-broken up by Homicide. Homicide hits a Diamond Cutter on Styles (and gives him the double middle finger), Daniels hits a Death Valley Driver on Homicide, and Hernandez hits the Crackerjack on Daniels. Hernandez climbs to the top of the cage, and misses a splash onto Daniels. Daniels sets up for the Angel’s Wings on Hernandez, but Konnan slips Homicide a wire coat hanger – which he uses to choke out Daniels. They yank him over to Konnan, who grabs ahold of the hanger outside the ring. Styles sets up for powerbomb, gets clotheslined by Hernandez, Homicide hits the Cop Killer – 1-2-3.

Winners, and new NWA World Tag Team Champions – LAX

Post-match, LAX continues to beat down both Styles and Daniels. I was expecting some sort of appearance from AMW here – but I guess not.

Video recap of the Sting/Jarrett fued.

Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett – Career vs. Title – NWA World Heavyweight Championship: with special ringside enforcer Kurt Angle. And Sting comes out with the old school Sting look – white, red and black face paint, just the tights, and no “The Crow” makeup. But, still carrying the baseball bat. Bit of stalling, and then some chain wrestling – which Jarrett gets the best of, multiple times. And the crowd really does not enjoy that. Sting actually seems to grow frustrated with his inability to gain an advantage. Well, I will admit, this is unexpected booking – the crowd isn’t really sure how to react. Jarrett actually spits on Sting, which finally turns the tide – Sting hits a powerbomb mid-ring, drops Jarrett on the turnbuckle, and clotheslines him over the top. Outside, JJ has a slight altercation with Angle, which gets the crowd fired up, but doesn’t actually go anywhere. Stings comes outside, and tosses Jarrett into the railing a couple of times. The ref comes out to lecture them – but Angle actually tosses him back into the ring, claiming that he’s in charge of that area. (Okay, has Angle A) really lost it, B) way too much into this character, or C) actually following a script? I vote for (B).) Angle stops Jarrett from using a chair, which allows Sting to get an advantage. Suplex by Sting on the ramp. Sting then grabs the chair, but that Angle stops that one too. Jarrett runs in and forearms the chair into Angle’s head, then gives Sting a DDT on the ramp. Back in the ring, Jarrett gets a sleeper (which the crowd boos, rightly so). Sting blows some sort of spot off the ropes, so they re-do it – both hit a cross-body block, and are down. The ref counts.. and gets up to 7 before he really gets my attention, He counts 8.. 9… te-… Angle runs in the ring, and gives the ref the Olympic Slam! Angle rolls the ref out of the ring, and screams “Let’s get it on!” (Nice UFC reference, Kurt.) Sting gets the advantage with some clotheslines, then hits a Stinger Splash on Jarrett’s back. Sting hits the Scorpion Death Drop, 1-2-kickout. Jarrett catches him, and hits the Stroke. 1-2-kickout. Jarrett goes for a piledriver, Sting reverses to a Tombstone, 1-2-kickout. Sting climbs the rope, Jarret hits him with a low blow, goes for a 2nd rope Stroke, but it’s countered. Jarrett locks in a figure-4 in the middle of the ring. Sting rolls it over, and Jarrett breaks but goes straight into the ankle lock – to much boos from the audience. (Nice facial expression from Angle, too.) Sting rolls through and sends Jarrett to the floor. Sting grabs the baseball bat, but Angle takes it away. Jarrett sneaks in with the guitar, and smashes it over Sting’s head… but Sting Hulks up! Punch, Scorpion Deathlok, sinks down into it… and Jarrett taps.

Winner, and new NWA Heavyweight Champion: Sting