I trust everyone’s been following along all week?
If you haven’t, then take a look to the right side of your screen and catch up. We’re not taking anything too seriously here”¦just some educated guesses on who will end up where. With a side of snark in a to-go bag”¦
Part Four!
Trot Nixon – RF: He’s another graduate from “Intensity University” who majored in “gritty”. Earlier this decade, Nixon had the résumé to back up the claims of how good a player he once was. Now, after several injury-littered seasons, his future is a question mark. For the right price, I can’t see him anywhere else but Boston, but Little Boy Epstein might want to invest in a right-handed hitting caddy for old man Nixon. (Prediction: Re-signs with Boston Red Sox, 1 year/$4.5M)
Juan D’Vaughn Pierre – CF: I just found out that this was Pierre’s full name and I won’t ever refer to him any other way. How did a brutha from Alabama get stuck with a Mexican-Afro-French name? I mean, was there anyone in North America that didn’t own his ancestors? Anyways”¦there are already talks that Pierre will return to the Cubs next year. He wants to test the market, but unless Dusty Baker lands a job somewhere and can’t find the remains of Tom Goodwin, I’m thinking that Pierre ain’t going nowhere. (Prediction: Re-signs with Chicago Cubs, 3 years/$15.5M)
Jay Payton – LF: A swing-at-everything corner outfielder with minimal power and no on-base skills to speak of”¦yet, Payton continues to find teams willing to give him 150 starts/year. The fact that Payton attacked and, essentially quit on the one manager (Terry Francona) who realized that he’s nothing more than a 4th outfielder should be all you need to know about the guy. He remains a good enough glove man and his 1980s National League skill set should serve him well with a team that doesn’t know any better. (Prediction: Signs with Atlanta Braves, 1 year/$4.5M)
Rich Aurilia – IF: Sooooo”¦in 2001, Aurilia slugs .572 with 37 home runs. After that, his offensive skills fall right off the map and by 2004, he’s barely hanging on to a bench job. Then, magically, in 2006, at 34 years of age, he slugs .500+ for the first time in five years. Do they sell this “flaxseed oil” in stores and, if so, what took Richie so long to re-stock his supply? Hopefully, no one’s dumb enough to hand over an armored truck to this guy. He was in the right place at the right time with Cincy last year and lightning won’t strike twice. (Prediction: Re-signs with Cincinnati Reds, 1 year/$4.5M)
Aaron Boone – 3B: According to Baseball-Reference, Boone’s best comp is former Marge Schott mascot, Chris Sabo. By the time “Spuds” was Boone’s age, he was pretty much done as an everyday major leaguer. Besides, even if you take the knee injury that ended Boone’s brief Yankees career into consideration, these things always have a way of working themselves out in the end. After all, Boone got a multi-year deal from the Indians, while the Yankees got Alex Rodriguez. Win-win. (Prediction: Signs with San Diego Padres, Minor League Contract)
Doug Mientkiewicz – 1B: Ryan Shealy will get Dougie’s job in KC, which leaves our old friend “eye chart” on the unemployment line. Since the Devil Rays actually gave Travis Lee 343 at bats last year, the thought here is that they’ll do anything to improve that production. Even if it means stitching Doug’s name on the back of one of their ugly jerseys. (Prediction: Signs with Tampa Bay Devil Rays, 1 year/$2M)
Sean Casey – 1B: The Mayor is falling dangerously close to that Hal Morris territory where no-power-hitting first basemen go to die. The fact that he was pretty much playing on one leg during the World Series will likely make the Tigers forget that his OPS was an anemic .724 in 2006. Expect ownership to do everything they can to milk the goodwill that an American League pennant produces. Seriously, this has the makings of one of the worst free-agent signings of the offseason. (Prediction: Re-signs with Detroit Tigers, 2 year/$10M)
Shannon Stewart – LF: Foot injuries limited Stewart to just 44 games in 2006, but he could be nice little signing for a team looking for help at the top of the order. In looking up some info on him, I found that he shares his name with a nude centerfold model. She has an “official site” and membership is only $16.95/month. That Shannon recently had a daughter, so I can’t imagine I’ll be visiting her site too many more times. (Prediction: Signs with Toronto Blue Jays, 1 year/$5M)
Craig Biggio – 2B: The future Hall of Famer needs just 70 hits to pass the 3,000 mark. He’s not going anywhere. Hard to believe that a case can be made for Biggio as the second best second baseman of this generation. Throughout his career, he was pretty much the player that everyone thinks David Eckstein is. (Prediction: Re-signs with Houston Astros, 1 year/$4M)
Andy Pettitte – LHP: I can’t imagine that the Astros were all that happy with the return on investing three years in this guy. He was hurt ’04, pitched great in ’05, and then was about league average in ’06. I read a report that had the Yankees going after him, but that ain’t happening. Pettitte will either finish his career in Houston or it’s already finished. With the right signings, Houston should be good enough to contend in 2007, but they’ll need Pettitte to get there. (Prediction: Re-signs with Houston Astros, 1 year/$10M)
