The SmackDown Report

Reviews, Shows, TV Shows

We’ve got an updated video clip to open, with Kane now joining the ranks, albeit Bobby Lashley is still involved. Tonight: Street Fight, Kane vs. MVP! Also, Bobby Lashley and Batista vs. King Booker and Finlay!

Opening Contest: Handicap Match: The Boogeyman vs. Mike Mizanin and Kristal Marshall
JBL continues to be confused how Boogeyman gets through customs, and if he walks around the UK eating worms. Mizanin and Boogeyman start off. Mizanin gets in a kick to the gut and some rights and sends Boogeyman head first into the top turnbuckle, but Boogeyman grabs him by the throat. Mizanin tries to fight him off but Boogeyman continues to choke him out, and Marshall attacks Boogeyman from behind! Boogeyman slams her down and Mizanin attacks Boogeyman from behind. Mizanin comes off the ropes with a clothesline and puts the boots to him, but runs into a fist full of worms! Boogeyman grabs Marshall by the ankle and drops the worms on her! Mizanin stays outside while Marshall does the petrified act; Boogeyman leaves the ring and his… music hits? Err, okay.
Winner: No Contest

Well that was weird. Marshall totally goes all B grade horror movie on us, but then again the Boogeyman is like a D grade horror movie villain so I suppose that all works out evenly. -Five out of Ten.

Sharmell and Booker are backstage doing the ‘All Hail’ schtick, but Finlay tells her to shut up. Finlay says that they’re tag partners tonight, but Booker says he isn’t simply his partner but rather the champion etc etc, and tells Finlay to keep his eye on Bobby Lashley while he’ll take care of Batista. Sharmell resumes her ‘All Hail’ chant.

Update on Rey Mysterio is next.

Commercials.

Recap of Guerrero destroying Mysterio’s knee. The video can be pretty graphic, we see a bit of blood and bone being worked on, so those who aren’t that good with graphic content may not want to watch it. Also, Mysterio wears the mask out of surgery; it’s silly but nice to see they’re still taking the mask seriously.

Second Contest: Chris Benoit vs. Tatanka
Can you believe Survivor Series is only a week or so away? It’s gone so quick, hasn’t it? Lock up and Tatanka forces Benoit into the corner and gets kicks to the gut and Benoit gets some chops in, sending Tatanka to the opposite corner. Benoit whips Tatanka into the other corner for more chops and Tatanka rakes the face and gets a short arm clothesline for a two. Tatanka locks on a sleeper hold, Benoit fan favorites out of it and hits a German and looks to go for the triple germans but Tatanka grabs the referee and then grabs the ropes. Tatanka puts the boots to Benoit and chokes him out, before throwing him to the outside and sends him into the steel steps. Back in the ring Tatanka gets a rib breaker and follows with the mounted punches. Benoit trips Tatanka and tries for the Sharpshooter but Tatanka kicks him off, and Tatanka locks on the boston crab but Benoit gets to the ropes! Benoit falls behind a scoop slam and hits the triple germans! Benoit with the chops to Tatanka and follows with knees to the head, but Tatanka sends him into the corner – Benoit back with elbows and trips Tatanka and locks on the Sharpshooter! Tatanka taps!
Winner: Chris Benoit

Post match, the obvious happens as Chavo Guerrero attacks Benoit from behind, sending him shoulder first into the steel pole and attacks Benoit with a steel chair before referees have to pull Guerrero off of Benoit. Tatanka didn’t look terrible out there, and we’ve certainly seen worse from him, but when you’re in a match against Benoit its hard not to have expectations. Two out of Ten.

Commercials.

Backstage, Long is walking around and runs into Kane. Long totally rambles on before he walks off.

JBL and Michael Cole talk about Mr. Kennedy and his feud with the Undertaker, and we get a video package of what happened last week between him and the Undertaker. Fantastic video as far as I’m concerned, if not a tad melodramatic. But that’s the WWE for you.

Mr. Kennedy is backstage and says that this time last year sports entertainment had no direction or future, but he has saved SmackDown and the future of sports entertainment. Kennedy says that when Taker arrived, no one had seen the package that he is and that he has no been surpassed… by Mr. Kennedy. It is Kennedy’s yard now, and he shows us the bloodied microphone, and hypes up their First Blood match.

Commercials.

Third Contest: Paul London w/ Ashley Massaro vs. William Regal
No Kendrick tonight, which blows and sucks. Regal’s pop isn’t apparently as loud as it was supposed to be. Lock up and Regal works the arm of London but London reverses it with some flips. Regal works the arm still and London gets in a headscissors but Regal slams him down, still hooking the arm. London flips over but Regal keeps the arm hooked and sends London outside, positioning his head against the steel pole and kicking it. Regal with knees to the head of London, and elbows in the corner. Regal sends London into the corner and continues with knees to the head, but London gets some shots to Regal’s midsection but Regal flips London over with a full nelson suplex for a two. Regal hooks on the full nelson and throws London into the ropes, and Regal nails a FANTASTIC reverse capture suplex. London with a dropkick to the chest of Regal and London with an enziguri and side kick, getting London a two count. London with elbows and goes for an irish whip but Regal reverses it; London slides out of the ring and knocks down Ashley! London with a shoulder body toss to Regal and Kendrick comes out to check on Ashley. Regal with a snapmare off of the second rope and a running knee to the head of London for the three count.
Winner: William Regal

Hm, do I smell a possible Hooliganz break up? Ashley seems more focused on London’s safety rather than Kendrick’s attention. Wasn’t the horrid combination that it could’ve been, so I’d like to see more between these guys (and throwing in Finlay until Taylor returns full time certainly wouldn’t hurt). Six out of Ten. Too short to really be anything more.

Recap of ECW this week, which hasn’t even been aired in Australia yet so effectively spoiling it for all of us… even though we’ve read the results anyways. Pretty much just recaps Lashley signing the contract for the ECW title match.

Lashley enters Long’s office. Long congratulates him and says he’ll be great in ECW, and Long says that he can already see him with the belt. Lashley thanks Long for being on SmackDown, and Lashley says he’ll be the next ECW Champion. Long wishes him nothing but success in ECW and the door is always welcome for him to return. Aw.

Up next: Street Fight! Kane vs. MVP

Commercials.

WrestleMania 23 is already only just around the corner! How time flies, eh?

Fourth Contest: Street Fight: Kane vs. MVP
MVP has new tights too, which are still horrid. Kane gets a big boot early on in the match and follows up with a shoulder body toss. MVP drops Kane throat first on the top rope and goes to hit Kane with a steel chair but Kane kicks it out of his hand. On the outside Kane sends MVP into the security rail as well as a street fight that is up near the entrance way as well as the phone booth. MVP traps Kane in the phone booth but Kane smashes the door right into his face and breaks some of the glass along with it. That’s pretty damned cool. Kane sets MVP up in the phone booth and pushes it over! Kane carries MVP back into the ring, but MVP uses the steel chair from before to fight Kane off. MVP is also bloodied too, and gets sent into the steel steps by Kane. Kane slams MVP off of the announcer’s table and then throws him into JBL. Kane slams MVP into the steel pole… man, apart from the phone booth bit, this is pretty damn boring. Kane looks to tombstone MVP on the steel chair but MVP turns it into a DDT on the steel chair for a two count.

Commercials.

We’re back and MVP… somehow… looks to have the upperhand, and big boots Kane in the corner. MVP with knees to the head of Kane, kicks the leg a few times and takes Kane down with a clothesline. MVP gets the ring bell but Kane sets up for a clothesline! MVP hits Kane in the arm with the bell and knocks it off of his head, and it dings! Cool. Kane sits right up and Kane throws MVP into the corner for punches and MVP walks out into a big boot. Running clotheslines to MVP in the corner are followed with a side slam. Kane comes off the top rope with the flying clothesline and signals for the clothesline… but leaves the ring and grabs the top half of the steel steps! Kane throws them into the ring but Kennedy attacks Kane from behind! Kane sets Kennedy up for a chokeslam but MVP with a low blow! Kennedy and MVP send the steel steps directly into the face of Kane for the victory!
Winner: MVP

Post match, the Undertaker makes his way out and chases off Kennedy and MVP! Kennedy sends MVP into the ring! Taker and Kane take it to MVP with right hands, and the two finish him off with a double team chokeslam! Kennedy makes his way back down to the ring but turns and walks backstage. Well, you put this in fast forward and you might have had something good, but as it was it’s watchable only for a cool spot or two. One out of Ten.

Commercials.

Fifth Contest: Matt Hardy vs. Gregory Helms
Helms starts off with a nicely done missile dropkick followed by mounted punches. Helms puts the boots to Hardy before he chokes him with his boot. Helms with spears in the corner and arm drag followed by knee drop. Helms chokes Hardy using the bottom rope. Helms looks to have locked on an inverted full nelson. Hardy with the clothesline bulldog combo for a two count. Helms with a school boy for a two count. Helms with another school boy, this time using the ropes, but the referee notices the use of the ropes just before the three. Helms turns the Twist of Fate into the Nightmare on Helms Street for another two count. Helms goes for the shining wizard but Hardy ducks and hits the side effect! Twist of Fate! Three count! wait, that was quick.
Winner: Matt Hardy

Very quick match and I feel like that will sadly mirror Helms’ involvement in the Survivor Series Match. Five out of Ten. This match was fun for what it was, and a hell of a lot better than their dragging series of matches.

Long checks in on MVP in the medic’s room. Long says that since he’ll be fine, next week he’s booking him against Kane. This time… it’s a Steel Cage Match. Joy.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell put on their own British romantic movie, and Batista comes up from behind them. Booker is so shocked his crown falls off. Nice. Booker says Batista gets the glory even though Booker is the champion of champions, but it doesn’t matter because over and over etc etc he has defeated Batista. And whether they’re in Manchester or at Survivor Series, King Booker is the victor. Batista simply says that tonight he’s going to beat him up, and take his title back at Survivor Series.

Up next: Bobby Lashley and Batista vs. King Booker and Finlay!

Commercials.

Survivor Series card run down compiled with King Booker’s entrance. Finlay then makes his entrance.

Commercials.

Main Event: King Booker and Finlay w/ Queen Sharmell vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Batista
Booker and Batista have a stare down to start, as do Lashley and Finlay. Batista and Finlay start. Lock up and Batista throws down Finlay, just like last week. Finlay gets a headlock on Batista but gets sent into the ropes and back into a shoulder block by Batista. Finlay walks right into an atomic drop, Batista trips Finlay and slingshots him into the ropes and back into his knees. Spears in the corner to Finlay by Batista, but Batista runs into a high boot and then Finlay walks right into a back drop for a two. Tag out to Booker. Lock up and Booker gets a knee to Batista and takes Batista to the corner for chops and right hands. Booker sends Batista into the corner but Batista comes back with a clothesline. Suplex to Booker by Batista for a two count. Tag out to Lashley. The two send Booker off the ropes and back into dual shoulder block. Booker with an eye poke and tag out to Finlay. Lashley gets Finlay in a military press and sends him into Booker. Batista comes in for the two to nail Finlay with a delayed vertical suplex, before they both clothesline Finlay outside.

Commercials.

Lashley with a baseball slide attempt to Finlay but Finlay pulls up the apron and takes the fight to Lashley, but Batista warns Finlay off. Finlay with a short arm clothesline to Lashley, and takes a shot to Batista on the apron before he sends Lashley shoulder first into the steel pole. Lashley off the ropes into a high kick by Booker, who apparently got tagged in. Lashley up into a sidekick by Booker for a two count. Booker locks Lashley in a sleeper hold, but Lashley escapes and the two share right hands. Lashley gets the better and gets Booker in a headlock but gets sent into the ropes and (what looks like shoddy editing, since they’ve flipped sides of the ring I think) comes back with a shoulder block. Lashley on the outside gets attacked by the Little Bastard! JBL says that there was a gaggle of Leprechauns in his hotel while the referee begins the ring out ten count. Lashley back in to stomps from Booker, who then continues the attack with mounted punches. Tag out to Finlay. Finlay with a kick to the ribs of Lashley, he continues the attack on Lashley with uppercuts but Lashley gets a scoop slam and elbow drop! Finlay with a leg drop to a kneeling Lashley, stopping him from tagging out to Batista.

Finlay with a sleeper hold on Lashley, but Lashley escapes with shots to the face of Finlay only to run right into a clothesline. Booker tagged in. Lashley gets sent into the ropes and back into an elbow by Booker. Booker helps Lashley up and Booker nails him with a dropkick for a two count. Booker with knees to the forehead of Lashley but Lashley sends him into the corner, Booker jumps up into a running powerslam attempt but Booker slides down and Lashley comes off the ropes with a spear! Batista in! Batista gives Booker and Finlay right hands and clotheslines. Finlay walks into a shoulder body toss before being clotheslined outside. Booker with an eye poke to Batista, Batista ducks a clothesline and hits the spear! Batista Bomb set up but Finlay clotheslines Batista down! Lashley spears Finlay and Lashley taken down by a side kick by Booker! Booker sets Batista at the ropes and distracts the referee, allowing Sharmell to hit Batista over the head with her staff! Booker runs into the spinebuster for the victory!
Winners: Bobby Lashley and Batista

The usual stuff between Batista / Lashley and Booker / Finlay, but with a bit more clear direction this time. Finley’s doing most of the work to make Batista look dominant, while Lashley makes Booker look dominant. At least it’s sensible booking, apart from having Batista pin Booker. I suppose the optimist’s view on this match is that they’re trying to keep the storyline simple and it could actually be pretty decent, but the pessimist’s view is that the matches will suck. Better than some of their other matches. Four out of Ten.

So, tonight’s episode ends up like this;
Boogeyman vs. Mizanin / Marshall: -5/10
Chris Benoit vs. Tatanka: 2/10
Paul London vs. William Regal: 6/10
MVP vs. Kane: 1/10
Gregory Helms vs. Matt Hardy: 5/10
Booker / Finlay vs. Lashley / Batista: 4/10
SmackDown 17/11/06: 13/60

The Inside Pulse
Another passable SmackDown this week. Unless you just NEED to see yet another Helms / Hardy match, or Kane / MVP, or even Booker and Finlay / Batista and Lashley match. With another Kane and MVP match scheduled for next week, and probably yet another Helms and Hardy match, and there just has to be yet another combination between the four guys in the tag match. The entire show can be summed up with a yawn, and that probably will include next week’s as well sadly. Laters, everyone!