The Chrononaut Chronicles – WWE 24/7: NWA Championship Wrestling from Florida – Saturday, March 14, 1987
– I’m going to try to do recaps each month for this show (CWF), NWA World Championship Wrestling, and WWF Prime Time Wrestling as they appear on WWE 24/7 since they all have a lot of squash matches, so they’ll be fairly quick and easy to write. You couldn’t pay me to recap the AWA shows they offer from the ’70s though. Well actually, if you paid me I would, but I don’t see that happening.
– Mike Graham introduces the show for WWE 24/7 from a speedboat on a beautiful lake somewhere in Florida as he says that this is one of the reasons wrestling stars from around the world wanted to work in Florida. Lucky prick.
– After the funky opening, Gordon Solie & Buddy Colt welcome us to the show and run down this week’s lineup before being joined by JJ Dillon, Lex Luger, Arn Anderson, & Tully Blanchard at the desk. Lex explains his decision to expand nationwide from Florida and join the Four Horsemen, Arn puts over Jim Crockett Promotions and the Horsemen’s dedication to the business, and Tully shows off his NWA TV Title belt as he talks about the Horsemen being an elite unit and they all join hands in a sign of solidarity. Luger looks kinda lost out there, but what else is new.
– To complete the Horsemen theme, we get a special videotape message from NWA World Champion Ric Flair, who basically puts over Florida as the hottest territory in the NWA as he lists off names like Eddie & Mike Graham, Dusty Rhodes, Barry Windham, Mike Rotundo, Scott Hall, & Kevin Sullivan. Just in case we forgot which company won the wrestling wars, the WWE 24/7 “Terri-stories” popup informs us that Flair would go on to win the “WWE” Championship at the ’92 Rumble as the Nature Boy brags about being the best wrestler in the world, making the most money, and wrestling the most times because promoters know his name on the marquee means asses in seats. Flair rips the guys he put over earlier as he challenges any of them to shut his mouth and notes that “Diamonds are forever, and so is Ric Flair.” Ah, so true.
– Mike Rotundo vs. Sean Royal
This is Rotundo’s debut/return to Florida since I believe he was still teaming with Danny Spivey in the WWF early in ’87. Royal is one-half of the New Breed with a “futuristic” haircut (a mullet with some lines shaved into it) and snazzy tights as they claimed to be from the future, although that backstory isn’t touched on here and I’m not overly familiar with it anyway. Competitive little squash that sees Rotundo pin Royal after the dreaded airplane spin. Afterwards, Rotundo joins Gordon & Buddy at the desk to cut a quick promo promising to win the Florida Heavyweight Title from Big Ed Gantner tomorrow night in Daytona. Solie notes that would be a steppingstone to a shot at the NWA World Title.
– After a commercial break, Kevin Sullivan is at the desk to promo his Thunderdome match against Badnews Allen and accuses Solie of “wining and dining” with Badnews, which leads to a video of Gordon interviewing Allen over lunch at a restaurant. Sullivan has a point; isn’t that blurring the lines of objectivity just a bit, Gordo? Badnews talks about being a man of honor and not needing to sign a contract to keep his word as we see a series of clips chronicling Allen’s recent babyface turn: after Allen & Sullivan did a job for Sir Oliver Humperdink, the Dinkster splits the money by giving $24,000 to Kevin and $500 to Badnews as Kevin notes that “his type” go crazy for $500 and walks off with Sir Oliver. In the next clip, Allen gets his hands on Humperdink but Sullivan & Kareem Mohammed (a big fat black guy in camouflage) bust Allen open and beat him down. The next clip features Solie giving Allen an envelope of money from Sullivan, but Allen wonders if this is “the new math” since it’s nothing close to what he’s owed and heads down to the ring to brawl with Sullivan. Another clip shows Allen & Sullivan brawling out into the street in broad daylight and then we see footage of a match pitting Allen against Humperdink, who is bleeding heavily as the ref gets bumped and Sullivan interferes to give Hump the pinfall. Back to the luncheon interview, Badnews explains the Thunderdome concept (a cage with a dome, pretty simple really) and states that two men enter, but only one man leaves. Finally we go back to the desk with Sullivan, who warns Allen that to become a king you have to kill a king. Great segment to recap the storyline, since I knew nothing about it before. Badnews plays a great “my word is my bond” face too, which is surprising if you’re only familiar with his WWF work as Bad News Brown like I am.
– Arn Anderson & Lex Luger vs. The Sterling Brothers
JJ Dillon & Tully Blanchard are in their fellow Horsemen’s corner for this total squash, during which both Sterling Brothers are referred to as simply “Mr. Sterling”. JJ joins Solie & Colt on commentary for a bit to do the old “I hate you but I respect you” bullshit as he credits Dusty Rhodes’ return for causing the biggest traffic jam in Orlando history, but notes that the Horsemen were there too. What kind of heel is that? Shouldn’t he have taken all the credit and said Dusty was lucky to be there too? Eh, what do I know. In the end, Anderson covers one Sterling after the spinebuster while Luger press-slams the smaller barefoot Sterling.
– Gordon & Buddy welcome Florida State Tag Team Champions Tracey Smothers & Steve Armstrong to the desk and they promo their title defense against the Mod Squad tomorrow night in Daytona Beach. Steve invites all the rednecks to get their pitbulls in the back of their pickup trucks and come on down to support the Southern Boys. I couldn’t be any less Southern, but I have a soft spot for this kind of stuff.
– Badnews Allen vs. Chris Champion
Champion is the other half of the New Breed and would go on to a brief WCW run as Yoshi Kwan in ’93, but his sneak attack to start this match is shrugged off by Badnews while the announcers hype tomorrow night’s Thunderdome match and put over Allen’s legit judo background. After dishing out some punishment to send a message to Sullivan, Allen finishes off Champion with a running powerslam. Afterwards, Badnews joins Gordon & Buddy at the desk and promises “no mercy” for Sullivan in the Thunderdome.
– Kevin Sullivan and his army are shown chanting “Two men enter, one man leaves” over and over as we go to commercial.
– At the desk, Gordon welcomes Ed Gantner & Oliver Humperdink, who claims that he is the Florida Champion but he’s letting Big Ed carry the belt. Sir Oliver puts himself over as the “King of Florida” and promos Big Ed’s match against Mike Rotundo tomorrow night before talking about the “dream date” contest where a lucky lady will win a date with Gantner. Humperdink cuts a solid heel promo, which makes me wonder why the WWF used him as a face manager. A great character for him would have been an annoying radio DJ type personality.
– We are treated to a brief video of Gantner working out and talking about the great feeling he gets from the cold steel when he pumps iron.
– Ed Gantner vs. Bob Cook
Ah, good ol’ Bob Cook was one of the better “enhancement talents” used by the NWA/WCW. Total squash here while Solie explains that Humperdink actually is the Florida Champion and won it from Badnews Allen under dubious circumstances in that clip we saw earlier. Gantner suplexes Cook into the ring from the apron for the 1-2-3. Afterwards, Gantner & Humperdink stomp Cook until Mike Rotundo makes the save. I’d never heard of him before, but Gantner is a big guy with a rather bland look.
– Back to 2006 as Mike Graham interjects from his boat in Florida to kiss Dusty Rhodes’ ass before we go back to 1987 again.
– Gordon welcomes Dusty Rhodes, who talks about the Thunderdome match and his big return to the Sunshine State. The American Dream touches on the great wrestlers in Florida and Ric Flair’s comments from earlier as he recalls that he defeated the Nature Boy for one of his NWA World Titles and repeats the Southern Boys’ invitation to all the rednecks. After Dusty leaves, Solie notes that Dusty has more charisma in his little finger than most people have in their entire body.
– Barry Windham vs. Chick Donovan
Barry is one-half of the NWA United States Tag Team Champions with Ronnie Garvin and Chick is another classic enhancement talent frequently used by the NWA and later WCW. After a competitive little match-up, Windham puts Donovan away with a flying lariat off the ropes. Afterwards, Kendall Windham (with a broken leg) comes out to congratulate his brother and Buddy Colt appears at ringside to interview them, but Humperdink & Gantner interrupt and Gantner attacks Kendall’s broken leg before Barry can chase them off. Those bastards!
– Nikita Koloff vs. Jack Towers
Nikita is the NWA United States Champion and I guess he’s a babyface since Uncle Ivan isn’t with him and there are no “USA” chants as Koloff squashes Towers in 30 seconds with the Russian Sickle, which is actually just called a “clothesline” here so he must be face.
– We get a special music video featuring “Boogie Woogie Man” Jimmy Valiant acting all Boogie Woogie at the beach and in his garage, along with random ass shots of chicks in bikinis. These are especially unsettling if you’ve heard the rumors about Jimmy’s penchant for Cleveland Steamers.
– Stan Lane & Scott Hall vs. The Barbarian & “Superstar” Bill Dundee
This is our feature match with five minutes remaining in the program. What is this, TNA? Of course, Scott Hall is the future Razor Ramon and founding member of the nWo complete with massive roided-up physique and thick porn ‘stache. He should have grown that back at some point during the nWo run and dyed it black too. Dundee lovingly removes Barbarian’s bondage gear before the bell and Lane armdrags the big man prior to ducking a big boot and landing a superkick. Lane decks Barbarian with a flying forearm off the ropes and twists his arm as the fans chant “Go Stan Go”, but Barbarian clubs away and knocks Lane through the ropes with a big boot. Dundee tries to bulldog Lane on the floor, but Sweet Stan pushes him off into the ringpost while Barbarian slugs it out with Hall and drops him with a big boot. I’m noticing a pattern with the Barbarian. Lane mauls a bleeding Dundee at ringside until Barbarian comes out to post Stan and throw him over a wooden barrier while Hall unloads on Dundee in the ring. Barbarian blindsides Hall and the heels pound Big Scott until Lane makes the save with a wooden chair that surprisingly doesn’t break. Lane takes Dundee out of the ring while Hall punches away on Barbarian until he bails out and all four men brawl around ringside. Hall pastes Barbarian with a metal chair to bust him open and REFEREE BILL ALFONSO makes an appearance to help stop the chaos, but he gets thrown around while Lane pounds Dundee in the ring. Solie signs off and the brawl continues as the credits roll.
– Mike Graham is glad we could all be here for another classic hour of Championship Wrestling from Florida and uses Solie’s “So long from the Sunshine State” line before speeding off in his boat. Fuck you, it’s freezing out here.
Afterthoughts: A pretty good star-studded show although I’m unfamiliar with a lot of the storylines and some of the lesser-known guys since CWF has only been on WWE 24/7 for a couple of months. I’m looking forward to following the show though as I really enjoyed the Badnews Allen segment recapping his face turn and you can see some similarities to Stone Cold Steve Austin during his original face turn. It’s great to see NWA guys like the Horsemen, Dusty, Windham, & Rotundo and I really dig the territory system with everyone vying for the Florida Heavyweight Title since it means a crack at the NWA World Title. See you next time, and so long from the Sunshine State!
