The SmackDown Report

Reviews, Shows, TV Shows

What a crappy week. I get a toe infection, now because my course is over (though I’m trying for two diplomas next year); Centrelink tells me that in order to continue receiving money I need to hand in ten resumes every two weeks, even though I should be pretty much already in one of the courses. I suck at resumes. The temperature isn’t making this much of a good week either. Oh well. Can you believe Armageddon is only the weekend after this one? That went quick.

Tonight: Batista vs. Finlay!

Open up with Mr. Kennedy making his entrance. There is a Hearse at the entrance way. Kennedy says that Taker can’t throw him off of his game, as he happens to be the guy who has already beaten him twice – since no one else can lay claim to that. Kennedy says he is fully focused on defeating Kane tonight, and then will be fully focused on defeating the Undertaker at Armageddon. The Hearse starts up and the bells begin to toll. The Hearse drives to ringside and opens up to reveal The Undertaker. Kennedy leaves the ring and runs through the crowd, while Taker poses in the ring. Nice and quick way to start the show.


Up Next: John Cena Interview

Opening Contest: Brian Kendrick and Paul London w/ Ashley Massaro vs. Dave Taylor and William Regal
When did Taylor get the clear? Hm. London and Kendrick attack early, dropkicking the heels off of the apron. They send the Brits inside the ring and take them to the corner and whip the pair into each other. Stereo dropkicks to Taylor, and London gets a two count over Regal. Tag out to Kendrick, who comes in with a headlock to Regal’s Shoulder. Kendrick twists the arm and tags out to London, London in off the top rope to Regal’s shoulder. Elbow by London for a two count. Kendrick back in and the pair send Regal into the ropes and back into a double hip toss, splash by Kendrick for another two count. Taylor gets tagged in. Kendrick whips Taylor over. The pair lock up and Kendrick kicks Taylor down and twists the arm into a hammerlock, and takes Taylor into the corner. London in, and JBL calls Kendrick a hot little chick. I think?

Anyways Taylor gets the upper hand over London and tags Regal in, Regal in with knees and a snapmare. Regal with a headlock but London elbows him, Regal sends him into the ropes and London back with a crossbody for a two count. London almost skins the cat but Taylor attacks him and sends him back into the ring, Regal gets a pinfall attempt on London. Regal with a cobra clutch, London fan faves out of it but gets taken back down with a suplex throw by Regal. Taylor in for a two count. Taylor gets London in a full nelson, London almost fan faves out of it but Taylor throws him to the ropes and Regal gets a cheap shot. Taylor goes for the pinfall but it’s broken by Kendrick. Regal gets a two count over London. London gets a reverse dropkick to Regal, but Regal drops a knee to London’s neck. Taylor in with a dropkick, before he hooks London’s head and arm. Taylor releases the hold and clubs away at London and sends him into a high boot by Regal.

London goes for a sunset flip but Regal moves before London can grab him. Taylor in with an abdominal stretch, but London looks to get a small package but Taylor rolls through into an arm bar and Regal tagged in! Regal with elbows, but London looks to be about to fight back but Regal regains the upperhand and puts London in a headlock, but London tags out to Kendrick! Kendrick in with elbows, high heel kicks, and gets the Sliced Bread No. 2 on Taylor for almost a three count, broken by Regal! Regal stalks Massaro at ringside but London fights him off, she hugs London and Kendrick is all cut about it. Regal clotheslines the back of Kendrick’s leg whilst on the apron. Taylor gets the three count over Kendrick.
Winners: William Regal and Dave Taylor

Not exactly what I was hoping for, since the other matches between Kendrick / London and Regal have been higher than my expectations. But very well paced none the less and enjoyable. I hope their title match is better and longer, however. Five out of Ten.

John Cena interview. Cena talks about what Armageddon means before says he’ll get payback for every beat down Finlay has given him, and remembers that King Booker made him kiss his feet. They’ll find out why their opponents at Armageddon are the Champions.


Batista interview. He basically tells Finlay to bring it tonight.

This leads to Booker and Finlay arguing backstage. Booker says that Long is after Booker and therefore now after Finlay. Finlay says he talks too much, and that he’s going to out and knock Batista’s head off.


Second Contest: Batista vs. Finlay
Lock up and Batista takes Finlay to the ropes, Finlay shoves him and Batista slaps him a few times. Finlay goes behind but Batista takes him to the corner for an elbow and right hands, before he forces his knee into Finlay’s head. Test of strength is won by Batista, but Finlay twists the arm, Batista reverses it and gets Finlay in a hammerlock but Finlay gets to the ropes. Finlay gets Batista on his knees and rakes and elbows at the face. Uppercut and short arm clothesline by Finlay, knee drop for a pinfall attempt. Batista with elbows and irish whip to Finlay, and Finlay comes back into a bad clothesline. On the outside, Batista slams Finlay into the apron and goes to dart Finlay into the steel post but Finlay falls behind Batista, Finlay shoves Batista into the post but Batista stops himself and sends Finlay out into the audience.


We’re back and Batista goes for a suplex but Finlay turns it into a hammerlock. Finlay gets Batista in the shoulder claw and then elbows the shoulder, before he takes Batista to the apron and sends him into it, following up with an elbow. In the corner the two exchange shots with Finlay getting the upper hand after he takes a shot at Batista’s knee. Batista gets some low punches and looks to be getting the advantage but Finlay finger pokes the eyes and sends Batista outside. Finlay follows outside only to get sent into the apron by Batista! Batista rolls Finlay back into the ring and hits the suplex for a two count. Batista takes Finlay to the corner, hooks his arms with the ropes, and chokes him with his boot. I must admit, I like that move. Finlay off the ropes into a kick to the gut by Batista, and Batista knocks him down and applies a hammerlock. Back into the corner, Batista hooks Finlay’s arm in the ropes, Batista sends Finlay into the corner but runs into a big boot! Batista with a big boot to Finlay.

Finlay sends Batista shoulder first into the steel post. Finlay with knee drops to the shoulder, before he extends it by hooking it against the ropes and pulling. Finlay works the arm, sending Batista shoulder first into the turnbuckle, before he comes back down into an arm bar turned into the hammerlock. Batista picks Finlay up and nails the Samoan drop. Batista with shots to Finlay, clotheslines and slam by Batista. Spinebuster by Batista, but the Little Bastard jumps off the top rope! Batista throws him into Finlay, and goes to nail Finlay with the Batista Bomb but Booker comes out! Batista throws Booker outside and goes to Batista Bomb him through the announcer’s table, but Finlay attacks him from behind with the shillelagh!
Winner: Batista

Booker and Finlay continue their assault and send him shoulder first into the injured arm of Batista, before Booker attacks his shoulder with a steel chair! Finlay hits the arm with the shillelagh to boot! Match was watchable, but nothing more really. Three out of Ten.


Third Contest: Number One Contendership for Gregory Helms: Jimmy Wang Yang w/ Amy Zidian vs. Jamie Noble
Yang gets the entrance. Helms gets an entrance, he’s on commentating tonight. And yet Noble doesn’t. Go figure who’ll win. Yang gets a headlock and Noble takes him down using the leg. Yang off the ropes with a shoulder block, some gymnastics and Yang gets a hurricanrana on Noble. Yang goes for a ten count punch in the corner but Noble pushes him off and ends up with a knee to the head of Yang. Noble gets a short arm clothesline and leg drop for a one count. Yang off the ropes with what looks to be a headscissors but he turns into a school boy, Noble kicks out. Yang runs right into a high knee by Noble for a series of two counts. Scoop slam gets Noble another failed pinfall attempt. Noble gets Yang in a headlock, Noble goes for a back drop but Yang falls back on him for another pinfall attempt. Noble runs into an elbow by Yang, nice kick off of the second rope and Yang follows with clotheslines but Noble ducks the third and gets a powerslam. Noble runs into a high boot and Yang gets the moonsault for the three count.
Winner and Number One Contender: Jimmy Wang Yang

Didn’t really care much for this match, even if it has announced a match I wanted to see for Armageddon. Was a predictable result and, well, pretty much forgettable, they at least put some effort in I suppose. Two out of Ten. Man, I remember when I used to be a massive Noble fan.

Backstage, Benoit defends what he did on accident to Vickie Guerrero at Survivor Series. Guerrero yells at him and then slaps him. She storms off and runs into Chavo Guerrero.

Tonight: Kane vs. Mr. Kennedy!


MVP is backstage with Theodore Long, trying to convince him to scrap the match against Kane at Armageddon. MVP yells about his contract, but Long says that if he doesn’t wrestle then he’ll be fired. Long offers him a chance to soften up Kane a bit; and sets up, yet again, MVP and Kennedy vs. Kane and The Undertaker.

Sylvan is in the ring talking French. Chris Benoit interrupts. Enough said.

Fourth Contest: Chris Benoit vs. Sylvan
Benoit attacks right away and quickly gets the Triple Germans, and then gets another Triple Germans and locks on the Crossface for the victory.
Winner: Chris Benoit

Well … it’s a squash. Duh. -Five out of Ten.


Sixth Contest: Mike Mizanin vs. Scotty Too Hotty
Lock up and Mizanin gets Hotty in a headlock and sends Hotty into the ropes but Hotty comes back with a shoulder block. Mizanin sends Hotty into the ropes but Hotty catches himself between the middle and top, Mizanin takes a run but Hotty moves out of the way and Mizanin gets sent outside. Mizanin jumps over the top rope with a shoulder block to Hotty for a two count. Hotty comes off the ropes into an elbow by Mizanin. Mizanin runs into the turnbuckles and Hotty gets the face buster and sets up for the Worm, but Mizanin sends him throat first into the rope and pulls on the tights for the victory
Winner: Mike Mizanin

Post match, Mizanin attacks Scotty Too Hotty and goes for his own version of the Worm, but the Boogeyman comes on out! Mizanin turns around right into him and he clotheslines Mizanin down and just tosses Mizanin around ringside, before throwing him into the steel steps. Boogeyman puts the worms in his mouth but Mizanin escapes. Too short and meaningless for anything above, say, a two? One out of Ten. It’d be in the minus, but it not only served a purpose but also had some moves and didn’t drag.

Tonight, still: Mr. Kennedy vs. Kane


Video hype for MVP vs. Kane at Armageddon.

Backstage, Kane is in front of a Christmas tree and singing…. Right. Cole; “What do you make of that?” JBL; “I make that he’s in the Christmas Spirit. And a Monster.”

Run down of Armageddon’s Main Events.

Run down video of Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker feud, including what happened earlier in the show.


Main Event: Mr. Kennedy vs. Kane
Kennedy attacks right away while Kane is making his entrance, but comes off the ropes into a big boot. Kane takes it to Kennedy in the corner and then gets a scoop slam and elbow drop. Kennedy fights Kane off but gets thrown back into the corner by Kane, who continues his attack. Snapmare and leg drop by Kane for a two count. Kane runs into a high elbow but Kennedy then runs into a clothesline by Kane. On the outside, Kennedy looks to be getting the upperhand and removes the padding from the security rail, only to turn into a right hand by Kane. Short arm clothesline by Kane. Kennedy drags Kane outside and rakes the eyes before he dropkicks Kane into the exposed steel security rail, as the referee begins a ten count.

Kane rolls back into the ring but Kennedy is right at him with elbow drops and a DDT for a two count. Kane gets taken down by a Russian leg sweep, but kicks out at the two count. Kennedy gets Kane in a sleeper hold, Kane looks to be about to escape but Kennedy takes Kane to the corner for spears and some stomps. Kennedy runs right into a choke by Kane, but Kennedy goes for another DDT but Kane throws him across the ring. Kane with the rights and a shoulder body toss. Clotheslines in the corner to Kennedy by Kane, and Kennedy walks right into a sideslam. Kennedy comes off the ropes with a swinging neckbreaker and goes up top, but Kane sits up! Kennedy jumps off right into a right hand by Kane, and Kane goes up top! Kane comes of with the flying clothesline! MVP comes down and Kane gets him in the choke, Kennedy attacks from behind and MVP joins in, resulting in the DQ
Winner: Kane

The bells toll and Kane has vanished, and MVP is alone in the ring. Kennedy runs through the audience. Kane’s pyros explode from the ring posts and his music starts up again, as SmackDown fades to black. Yet another bland match tonight. Two out of Ten.

Hooliganz vs. Regal / Taylor: 5/10
Batista vs. Finlay: 3/10
Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Jamie Noble: 2/10
Chris Benoit vs. Sylvan: -5/10
Scotty Too Hotty vs. Mike Mizanin: 1/10
Mr. Kennedy vs. Kane: 2/10
SmackDown 08/12/06: 7/60

The Inside Pulse
An all around just boring and bland event just there to promote the next upcoming pay per view. Wasn’t a strong sell, a slightly interesting one, but it’s hard to be sold since we’ve seen the entire upper card several times over just under different circumstances. Just an all around passable show here, ladies and gents. Until next week!