ARMAGEDDON!
TONIGHT IS THREE HOURS
LIVE AT O’BRIENS’ TAVERN
T H E
M O N D A Y
N I G H T
R A B B L E
Now before I begin – let me first tell a tiny story. There is this startling rumor on the forum boards that I look like the Grinch. It was started by one of my fellow Moderators, Paulie. Now, I’m not going to get really into it, but I feel I’d be doing the Rabble a disservice by not posting this really funny bit, given to us by Insyder GrinchStoleServers aka AFacelessName.
So without further adieu:
..smartass.. But it can’t be said I’m not fair and impartial even at my own expense. Somewhere in that thread is also a picture of my chinchilla (or one that looks close enough to mine) with antlers on it… they really were having a good time.
Now onto the Rabble.
So not only is it a three hour Raw – we walked into the bar and there sat a dozen or so fisherman all coming back from the boat. We’ve been told they’ll be leaving shortly, so that means we’ll get into all of the Raw-Madness as time goes on.
Also, since it’s three hours, God only knows when people are going to be showing up. I’ll add names to the list as they appear. So let’s get to it…
Tonight’s Rabbleites are!
JEFFREY – The Bartender with Sole
BILL – The Silver Fish.. I mean Silver Rage artist!
DANIELLE – She’s my own lovely blowfish. Ha, get it.
HERNANDEZ – El Pesce Grande!
JENNA – El Pesce Grande Con Queso?
MIKE – The Puffiest Puffer Fish That Ever Did Puff…
..and The Insyders – Inside Pulse’s Forumers of the Pond.
And tonight – Sylvester Stallone is going to be at the show!??!?!? He will have to face Thunderlips.. I KNOW IT!
“UH yo, maybe I’ll fight Apollo and maybe I won’t.” – Insyder Charlie_Manson
Also the largest battle royal ever on television? I’ll be the judge of that. The winner gets to face John Cena at the end of the night.
See – the show is starting, and just Bill & Dani are here… I warned you all.
Starting in the ring already is a whole shitload of wrestlers…. including the Brooklyn Brawler?! We’re here just in time though for Shawn Michaels intro. Before his entrance ends, we are joined by Hernandez, Eric, and Jenna appear.
“I think if you get your entrance your chance of winning goes up astronomically.” – Insyder GrinchStoleServers
Now here comes Carlito!
“Hey Bill?” – Me
“HEY! Hey Eric” – Bill
“Hi” – Eric
Yep – it’s Randy Orton.
“So how many people are in it?” – Dani
“I don’t know..” – Me
“So there are going to be a ring full of people all moshing around?” – Dani
“Yep.” – Me
“Because that’s funny.” – Dani
Now it’s time for the Game! The minute he gets in there, the bell rings and it’s melee action! Edge still hasn’t even gotten in the ring… and Masters heads out with Carlito and Edge SPEARS him.
So Carlito gets thrown in to the ring – and over the top by Masters. So Lawler is punching Brawler.. and Brawler gets tossed over the top.
“Now run to the back and put on the Kim Chee outfit” – Hernandez
Shelton crawls his way back in from the top rope – as Hacksaw is tossed out – and Viscera throws out Sgt Slaughter. I really can’t give you all of the action going on.. there’s a lot of it. We’ll just do our best to tell you who gets tossed out.
Ron Simmons is elbowing Eugene in the corner and Ric is throwing RKO out… but doesn’t happen obviously. In the corner Hunter is trying his best to throw Edge over, with his head between his legs.
“Lita’s favorite position.” – Hernandez
Val Venis trying to throw out Charlie Haas. Snitsky choking out Lawler in the corner.
“Snitsky’s alive?” – Jenna
“It’s not his fault” – Hernandez
Charlie Haas keeps trying to throw people over.. finally trying to throw Hunter out – but Shawn comes back to bite on his face…. Hunter slips back in.
Viscera pushing HUnter into Masters – and this is a squishy moment… finally ending with Visc trying to throw out one of Cryme Tyme out – but it’s not happening. Lawler stops it and he and the Highlanders beat down on the big white sheet that is Viscera.
Hunter actually hits Visc with the big knee – and he and Michaels JUST get him over the top! DX has eliminated Viscera.
“Didn’t it take like 45 people to get Viscera out during other shows?” – Eric
COMMERCIAL ONE – 8:10
“Why is there no Stallone yet? Damnit I want Rocky! Balboa or Maivia, either way at this point.” – Insyder Charlie_Manson
“Dennis… Eugene IS already in the ring.” – Insyder GrinchStoleServers
We’re back after a three minute commercial break!? So during the break – we don’t know what happened.. but now that we’re back Ron Simmons has eliminated Val and.. someone, but then Cryme Tyme has dropped Ron! Wow, nice lil spot. They give Ron the mic so we can all hear it…. ‘DAMN!’
I blink and the shorter Cryme Tyme guy gets eliminated… The Worlds Greatest Tag Team drops the TALL guy from Cryme Tyme, then DX drops Haas.
Masters drops Lawler! Crazy and Jeff Hardy eliminate each other with a rana-ish bit, yet somehow Murdoch remains!? Eugene is working on Shawn Michaels.. and Shawn seems to almost be relaxing on the corner.
“He should eliminate Shawn.. that would be awesome” – Dani
We’re slowing down now. Snitsky trying to press slam Hunter over the top – Hunter fights it out – kick to the gut and a DDT and then Hunter goes and THROWS Kenny to the second row.. except that Kenny holds on and slides back in. Nice spot for Kenny.
Hunter and Shawn point out to the crowd for Eugene….. annnnnnd out he goes. Cute bit. Snitsky goes to big boot Masters – but Masters drops the top rope and out goes Snitsky. Flair throws Murdoch out. We’re thinning out.
We have Masters, Randy, Edge, Shawn, Hunter, Nitro, Flair, Cade, and Kenny.
Flair tries to throw out Kenny.. but the bad guys throw out BOTH OF EM! To a chorus of boos.. this leaves Bad guys versus… DX. Oy.
COMMERCIAL TWO – 8:20
We’re back with Nitro beating on Shawn and Cade on Hunter with the other baddies waiting in the wings. Ordge runs in and stops SHawn now – Hunter goes and stops Edge while Orton goes and chokes out Shawn. Masters pulls back Hunter’s arms while Nitro and Cade take turns punching on Hunter.
In the other corner, Michaels is holding onto the corner while Ordge goes after him. Hunter catches a gorgeous boot on Cade shooting out his gum.
“PERFECT SPOT!” – Hernandez
Hunter catches the high knee on Cade – the facebuster on Masters – Clothesline and Masters out!! Then turns all the bad guys and HUNTER IS OUT!
“DX: Hey Master, look, a syringe chock fulla steroids!
Masters: where?!? where!?! *gets eliminated*” – Insyder GrinchStoleServers
They surround Shawn.
“Praying to God.. praying to God” – Me
Shawn runs and charges in beating on every single one of them. Nice launching spot. He throws Nitro to the ropes – bends down and gets kicked in the face. Nitro charges him and gets tossed over the top. Nitro gone. Edge comes after him and he eats the flying forearms of Shawn! Nip up and he atomic drops Orton!
“MICHAELS WITH THE FLYING BURRITO TO EDGE!” – Insyder CaptainKringle
Shawn heads to the top now with Orton in the middle – he HITS the elbow! Edge has disappeared… just so you know.
J E S U S – C H R- There’s Edge… getting superkicked out. Cade clubs Shawn in the back of the head and now Orton throws out Cade. Technically Edge seems to STILL be in the match. Not sure on that – but Orton is now sitting in the ring with Shawn.
He drops to his knees and starts staring at Shawn.
“MIND BULLETS!” – Hernandez
“That’s telekenisis Kyle.” – Dani
“Randy.. Chin lock.” – Bill
Randy is waiting for Shawn to get up. He gets up.. RKO.. NO! Shawn pushes Randy out and lands face first.. Ow.
“He didn’t hit his face – there was some in game clipping” – Eric
So Shawn is sitting against the ropes – Orton charges up… CLOTHESLLLIII-NO! Shawn drops and Orton is out!
Shawn is standing against the ropes and out of nowhere EDGE! Drops Shawn – Edge wins!
WINNER: EDGE
COMMERCIAL THREE – 8:31
We’re back and JR is pimping up Tribute of the Troops.
“Shut up, you just are happy you don’t have to work on Christmas” – Eric
In the back – Todd is there to talk to Edge. Edge’s thoughts on facing Cena? He’s expecting to face his newly gained world championship against Umaga. Orton goes to celebrate with him to ask about the Tag Team belts.. Edge has bigger plans and Orton has a smirk that says ‘TURN?!’
“Or it says RKO on a car.” – Bill
Last week – Masters put TOrrie’s breasts in the Masterlock.
“There has never been a sexier Masterlock” – Bill
“Did he ever put it on Maria?” – Me
“No.” – Hernandez
In the back – Maria…………….
Wow……..
SCREENSHOTS!
SHE’S WEARING LACY THINGS!
FUCK!
She introduces Masters tentatively. Worried about being put in the Masterlock. Masters explained that he’s not the bad guy.
“To be the bad guy you need to stop shaving your chest.” – Hernandez
“And get a toothpick” – Me
Masters oils himself up to a fine sheen, and we’re done here.
“There’s something frightening about Masters oiling himself pre-interview.” Outsyder CashKerouac
They show the Mercury Nose Ah’Splode spot about a half a dozen times…. EL KABONG!
COMMERCIAL FOUR – 8:41
In the arena. Todd introduces Vladimir Kozlov. Mombo King? MMA guy?
“Everything he heets… he deestroys!” – Me
Vlad starts screaming in a foreign language.
“That’s just Ludvig Borga with darker hair!” – Me
“Ah, the good ol’ days when the Ruskies were the bad guys. Bring back the cold war!” – Insyder Santa_Maria
Hey – here comes Chris Masters.
“Lawler just likened him to Rocky… oh wait.. POWDERED TOAAAAAST MAAAAN” – Bill
“And though it was supposed to last for eight nights, Chris Masters used all of the oil in only one night, and ever since we have celebrated the Miracle of Chanukah.” – Outsyder CashKerouac
So before he even gets down to the ring, out runs Carlito! He rolls Masters down the ramp and into the ring. Masters takes a running leap off the steps and double axe handle. Carlito beats him on the railing for the audience, but gets pushed into the camera.
“AFRO CAM!” – Jeffrey
Masters now clotheslines him over the railing and they fight on the outside in the audience. Carlito gets the upper hand and comes back to ringside and he is busted open.. somewhere.. he spits some blood and gets pissed off.
Well… there was your match.
COMMERCIAL FIVE – 8:50
It’s Nitro-Time as here comes the red carpet.
“Hey! Where’s Mercury? His nose is in the front row!” – Me
JOHNNY NITRO & THE WORLD’S GREATEST TAG TEAM vs. THE HARDYS
“There’s something about TWGTT’s entrance pose that screams…Ambiguously Gay Duo.” – Insyder BSUVincent
So as the Hardy’s come on down Jeff is limping, not a good way to start the match. Ok so it seems it’s a handicapped match.
“Jeffy Hardy Need dayglo paint badly!” – Insyder GrinchStoleServers
Shelty starts with Matt and some nice chain wrestling. Ends with both on their feet at first. Shelty brings Matt into the corner and then starts slamming his arm against the corner turnbuckle. Finally Matt spins around SHelton in a front headlock. Tag to Jeff and Shelty throws Jeff to the corner front first and a tag to Charlie.
Shelton hits the reverse DDT and leaves the ring with Charlie stomping and punching down on Jeff.
“We’re in a tag team Charrrlieeee” – Me
“I’m going to pin him with a bridge!” – Bill
Charlie continues to beat the hell out of Jeff and finally gets a blind tag from Nitro who starts his own beatdown on Jeff.
“One punch for each stitch!” – Me
Back on their feet – Jeff spins Nitro around – gets his own beatings and throws Nitro to the ropes – climbs to the top and hits the Whispering In The Wind. Jr called it the Twist of Fate.
“If Cole saw that he would have called it the JUMPING Twist of Fate” – Eric
A tag to Charlie and Jeff finally gets a tag to Matt in – and they hit the launching side leg on Charlie and in run all the heels. Shelty and Haas get thrown over the top rope. Jeff hits the top rope and crashing into the TWGTT. Nitro runs in to grab Jeff, annnnnd MOONSAULT FROM MATT!
COMMERCIAL SIX – 9:02
In the ring – Jeff leaps behind Charlie Haas, an obvious reversal of an atomic drop… He gets clubbed by Shelton and a tag in turn to Shelty.
Shelt now works on the limpy leg of Jeff Hardy. Shelt hits the single leg crab and we’re in our hold spot. Jeff goes for the Matt tag – but Shelt drops Jeffa nd goes for a shoulder to Matt. Matt comes in and of course the ref distraction bit while everyone beats on Jeff. When it’s all over Charlie’s left wrapping up Jeff’s leg with Shelton holding onto his arms for electricity!
Tag to Nitro – more beatings. Melina even gets some shots in.
“Hot tag….. anytime now….” – Me
“They’ll be going to a commercial break any second now..” – Hernandez (at 9:10)
FINALLY THE HOT TAG!
Matt drops Shelton a few times. Charlie! Shelty to the corner and clothesline. Bulldog and a clothesline to Haas. Side Effect to all three… pin to Shelton stopped by Haas.
“He gives that to Nitro because Mercury takes it like shit.” – Mike
“But he takes a ladder like a champ.” – Me
Nitro pushes Hardy to the ropes where Haas chokes him against the ropes and Shelton rolls Matt up out of nowhere. That’s that!? We waited this whole time for that!?!?
WINNER: TWGTT & NITRO
Now the post match beatings with Nitro on Jeff. Nitro lifts him up for a SLOWWW sit down facebomb… thingie. I’m sure one of you motherf*ckers will tell me what it’s really called.
In the back now… Umaga with Armando discussing New Years Revolution. Armando doesn’t care WHO they face, but they hope it’s John Cena…
“HRNNNNNGGGGGGG! GARBANZOOOO!” – Hernandez as Umaga
“UNAGGGIIIIIII!” – Me
COMMERCIAL SEVEN 9:17
In the back.. Kevin Federline. I have little to say.
“It’s good that K-Fed has such a range of emotion.” – Dani
Hey – a Rocky commercial!
“RUNNING UP STUFF! THE MOVIE!” – Bill
“A montaaage” – Me
“Montage!” – Mike
Stallone isn’t even THERE… he’s on a feed… f*ck that noise.
“Where’s Tango?” – Me
“Where’s Cobra… Cobra kicked ass” – Mike
“What does he do with the shells?” – Jeffrey
“Demolition Man?” – Mike
So they talk.. I’m not discussing it. Cena in the back. Nothing.
COMMERCIAL EIGHT – 9:26
Ric Flair time!
“Bill?” – Me
“..woo” – Bill
“Lazy.” – Hernandez
Here comes Kenny Dykstra…
“When did he get a last name?!” – Hernandez
“When they put the ‘D’ on his tights.” – Mike
RIC vs. KENNY
Woo…
Kenny pushes Ric to the corner… but the exchange of chops Ric comes out on top. He chops Kenny in the corner. Then throws him to some ropes – leapfrogs Ric and Kenny hits a crossbody. Flair bails to the outside and Kenny follows him outside.
Suplex on the outside…. Throws Ric back in the ring. Pin for two. Elbows and kicks from Kenny, and finally chokes him against the second rope. Big elbow to Flair’s face and a pin for one. Ric hits the low shot – but Kenny follows up with more fisties and an elbow drop. Chinlock spot!
Ric gets to his feet and Kenny pushes him to the corner for two punches of doom before Ric pushes him out and hits the atomic drop. Chops him down. Ric heads up to the top and he gets slammed down.
“So who would you rather be chopped from.. Benoit or Flair?” – Mike
“Flair” – Me and Hernandez
“Wha?! Why?” – Mike
“Muscle.” – Me
Kenny goes for the leg drop – and misses! Now Flair with the chops all over the place. Kenny hurls Kenny to the corner. Reversal. Kenny goes for the knee! Ric moves out of the way! Ric now goes for a figure-four….. ROLL UP! KENNY WINS IT!
“SELL THE KNEE SELL THE KNEE!” – Mike
He doesn’t.
“YOU SUCK!” – Mike
Ric then offers him a hand. A hand of friendship. Annnnd….
No.
“Ric, pull out a shotgun.” – Eric
“I’d mark.” – Mike
COMMERCIAL NINE – 9:38
We’re back and here comes Edge.
“Our Ten O Clock Spot?” – Eric
They show us the bit how Edge won the battle royal.
“It was a horrible ending.” – Hernandez
“Using a move perfected by Jake The Snake Roberts” – Me
And now here comes Cena.
“Using the Sam Raimi Cam.” – Hernandez
EDGE vs. CENA
WORLD TITLE MATCHORZ OMGROFLCOPTOR!
Bell rings. Cena hits a belly to back. Pin for two. Side-headlock.
“Ten seconds in.. hold spot.. geezus.” – Me
“..woo..” – Hernandez
Cena throws Edge to the ropes and hits the boot.
“GLANCING BLOW!” – Hernandez
Pin for two. Cena now throws Edge to the corner and HE eats a boot. Now Edge throws him to the outside. Edge follows out and horrible head to the steps. Edge rolls in – Cena is on his way in and he gets flipped in. Front facelock from Edge annnnd another holdspot.
COMMERCIAL TEN – 9:50
Hey we’re back in A DIFFERENT hold spot!!?! The entire Rabble has gone on to play bar games.
“The bar is slow enough that I can watch.. and I don’t want to…” – Jeffrey
“You could go wash the glasses and come back and they’d be in the same spot.” – Me
“I did.” – Jeffrey
After a long thirty minutes, John breaks out of it. Hits the ropes – neckbreaker. Boos from the crowd. Clotheslines from Cena. Blue Thunder. Five Knuckle Shuffle. HE MISSES!
“Oh my God! HE moved!” – Hernandez
Edge hits the Spear! ONE.. TWO…. Umm.. was there a foot on the rope, because that’s why the ref stopped it, but nobody saw it. Oh, it was Cena’s hand on the rope… cute.
So Edge brings Cena to the corner. Superplex set up and Cena throws him out. Cena hits a top rope Fame-asser…. ONE… TW.. NOPE! Nice bit actually. Who knew Cena knew how to do that.
Cena throws Edge to the ropes – kick to the face. Throws Cena to the ropes – eats a top rope neck choke. Hits the Blue Thunder. Hits the Five Knuckle. F U tiiimmmmmmm – Edge rolls out of it, but Cena hits a reverse DDT and a pin? TWO!
Cena throws Edge to the ropes – and Cena runs in and Edge leaps up and he’s caught in the FU! Edge’s feet hit the ref! In runs Orton! RKO TO CENA! IN runs DX.. PEDIGREE TO EDGE! Ref is still dead.
Cena goes for the pin… after a long wait spot! ONE – TWO – THREE!??!?!
Remember kids, the Pedigree knocks you out for roughly three hours. This is only stopped if you are hit with another move. The paralyzing effects of the Pedigree can be countered by even a simple punch – but if you only pin a man within that three hour period.. there is no defense. Kind of like the Crane Kick from Karate Kid. Except lamer.
So Cena goes up the ramp and thanks DX…. Note: Trips and him shook hands, as if to say — nevermind, that won’t matter in two weeks. In the ring, Orton is holding onto Edge.
“Hold me close Randy… shit in my bag… call me daddy..” – Bill
COMMERCIAL ELEVEN – 10:04
Oh so they announced the main event tonight… Ordge & Umaga vs. Cena & DX.. that makes no sense.
Anyway – Cryme Time is out… Yo yo yo yo yo. The crowd responds. With? Yo.
Cryme Time have heard things – they’ve heard what Haas and Benjamin. They refer to DC as Chocolate City.. that’s not Chocolate City.
“Yeah, that’s Hershey Pennsylvania..” – Eric
So they brought down the .. umm… the President? So here come the jobber indy guys and a President imitators.
“Is that CM Punk?” – Me
“That’s the same guy who did the Hulk Hogan impression.” – Bill
“If they jump the President, will they get arrested?” – Mike
So the Faux-President makes black jokes… the crowd responds… WHAT?
We respond… WHA?!??!!?!?!
Finally, Cryme Time threatens the President.. he responds with — My bad.
This ends with Cryme Time stealing the President’s wallet.
“Mission Accomplished… WHAT?” – Bill
“I’d rather punch myself in the testicles than watch that again.” – Insyder Abominable_Snow_Titan
So the President dances when Cryme Time’s music comes on.
“Is that Scottie 2 Hotty?” – Bill
“I vote that Vince wrote that skit…” – Eric
The Secret Service guys talk to each other.
“So… when’s your match on Heat?”
“I don’t know.. they put me back to OVW…”
“Aww dude that sucks” – Me
So the President flipped everyone off at the end… good christ. Look, I’m a pretty left thinking guy, but good f’n christ that was almost offensive to ME… And I voted for Cthulu.
COMMERCIAL TWELVE – 10:16
Hey – she ain’t the lady to mess with… Here comes Victoria.
Now here comes Mickey James… now I guess this match is non-title since the one at New Years Revolution is for the belt. God only knows anymore.
VICTORIA vs. MICKEY JAMES
Umm… okie
So Victoria throws Mickey to the ropes – MNickey slides under Vick’s legs and Victoria grabs her and throws her to the corner. Superplex set-up and HITS IT! Pin for two.
“I could wath Mickie James arch all night long.” – Jeffrey
Victoria wraps Mickie’s arms around Vicky’s throat. Mickie fights out of it and hits a roll up for two. A backslide for two. Now Victoria kicks her in the gut.
“This match is so much better than the Cena Edge match.” – Jeffrey
Victoria grabs Mickey for the front plant – Mickie rolls up underneath for a pin for two. Vicky then hits the drop toe hold so Mickey hits her head to the bottom rope. THrows Mickey’s breasts into the corner turnbuckle and then a clubbing blow to the back of the head. Victoria tries to charge in and Mickey moves. Now Mickey hits the ropes and ducks a clothesline to hit two of her own.
“AND NOW MANTIS CLAW!” – Bill
Vickie throws Mickie to the corner and hits a back elbow, then a rana and a pin for two.
Victoria wraps up Mickie and picks her up for the sidewalk slam set-up – but Mickie reverses it out into a flying head scissors. She then picks up Victoria for the Mickie-Faction – but gets gutted on the top rope.
“That’s not fair, they can watch the titantron and see when the other is coming.” – Mike
“I’d like to watch the Titantron to see when they are coming.” – Me
*rimshot*
Victoria goes for the Widows Peak… HITS IT!
WINNER: VICTORIA!
So Mickie is out cold from a knee bump somehow… but Victoria checks off Mickie’s name and leaves it on her very large breasts.
COMMERCIAL THIRTEEN – 10:28
Actually they are doing the Tribute For the Troops commercial, but we don’t care. Thank God they squeezed one last song out of Creed.
“Nothing says Christmas like gathering the family in front of the TV to watch the WWE exploit the troops for ratings.” – Insyder Santa_Maria
We’re back – and JR is in the ring discussing Kevin Federline.
“Shlurpy Shlurp Shlurp” – Hernandez
He then invites him to the ring.
“This week in wrestling history… ratings plummeted” – Hernandez
“December, 18 2006… a day that live in ignorance..” – Me
So Kevin Federline talks. Kevin Federline says ‘K-Fed is Dead’… let’s just leave this on that note. He throws the mic at the end.
“DON’T THROW THAT! They are sensitive and expensive!” – Hernandez
“$500 fine!” – Hernandez
He probably said something that somebody gave a shit about. I don’t.
“Hey I was in the back making food, and missed it, thank God.” – Jeffrey
“When you are changing your brand on WWE.. you are going nowhere.” – Me
COMMERCIAL FOURTEEN – 10:41
“This is Edge’s third match tonight…” – Mike
“HEY! You think you know me?” – Bill
“…Damnit. The same Edge/Orton theme that sounds like it was thought up and cut by a three year old.” – BSUVincent
“Leave Hatton alone.” – Insyder Santa_Maria
“ZING!” – Insyder GrinchStoleServers
ORDGE & UMAGA vs. DX & CENA
..because we care..
COMMERCIAL FOURTEEN – 10:46
Ok – so the commercial break was 5 minutes – and they are STILL playing Umaga’s music… wow.
Cena music time. Meaning – DX > CENA.
“Meaning – Hunter still sleeping with Stephanie” – Eric
Match starts at … 10:56.
Orton in the ring with Cena.
“I predict Shawn is the face in peril in five minutes.” – Me
“Less.” – Mike
Beaties start between Orton and Cena. Cena throws Randy to the corner – kicks him to the gut. Fisherman suplex. Pin for two. Tag to Shawn.
“He’s in! The clock starts” – Bill
Shawn throws Randy corner to corner with closed fists and explains to him spots. Randy reverses it – drags him to Edge, tag in… and now Edge and Shawn are fighting it out in the corner. Shawn chops down Edge. Throws Edge to the ropes and Edge gets the boot to the face.
“That’s the third time tonight you’ve missed that spot.” – Eric
“That’s like the millionth time..” – Mike
“I meant tonight” – Eric
So a tag to Orton and Shawn hits the crossbody. Nip up and Umaga hits a clothesline in the corner… and now hey – Shawn’s in peril at 10:58… Mike was right.
Umaga tagged in and now the beatings begin. Hell he chases the ref out of the ring! Headbutts and beaties and such. Tag to Edge. Beatings. Finally Shawn hits a belly to back out of nowhere… hot tag time yet? I predict no.
Edge gets Umaga in there…. WAIT.. YES.. HOT TAG.. I was wrong!
Hunter in the ring with Umaga. Ducks all of Umaga’s punches. Throws Umaga to the ropes – reversed, hits the facebuster. Umaga remains standing. Two clotheslines has him wobbling. Hunter finally drops Umaga – hits the atomic drop on Orton. Kick – Wham – Pedi– Nope! Edge runs in and gets thrown out. He goes for it again but Umaga clocks Hunter. In runs Cena and he eats the spike to the throat.
Umaga hits the flying samoan drop to Shawn and Cena flies into Umaga. They fight up the ramp – then off the ramp – then through some glass..
“HARDCORE HOLLY SPOT!” – Hernandez
“Shane / Angle spot!” – Me
“No, then he would have had to go through it like three times” – Hernandez
So Orton and Hunter fight outside until Orton throws Hunter to the crowd and in the ring after a chair shot. While Hunter is hurt, they go and hit Shawn with a double RKO in the middle of the ring.
So now Hunter tries to go get the sledgehammer but he gets a baseball slide and Hunter is bleedy bleedy. They then give him some Conchairto on the announcers table. They hit him a good few times… hey Shawn’s bleeding too!
“Geez, that’s the table of Turrin” – Bill
He gets some conchairto too! Wait – lots of officials are here!
“Where’s Dean Malenko! THERE HE IS!” – Mike
So the bad guys leave.
And umm…. it’s over?
“The WCW ending!” – Hernandez
“You think that was bad.. look at Mercury” – Mike
So what did we think of that?
“The last fifteen minutes were crap.” – Bill
“I like darts.” – Jenna
“COuld have easily been a two hour show” – Hernandez
“Waaaay too long.” – Eric
“I thought too much today.. I had exams……… it sucked.” – Laura
“Cryme Time was the worst. The handicapped match sucks. More on this tomorrow night on the Rabblecast.” – Mike
“I’m impressed with how much blood they had in the show. Cena and Edge – Never again.” – Jeffrey
And my final thoughts – yeah – too long. Waaaaay too long. Did we need the battle royal for Edge to get it? Give it to Eugene or at least someone we didn’t expect. For f*ck sake.
OK that’s the show – and remember kids, if you want to be one of the Insyders, head off to THE FORUMS! BE AN INSYDER! DO IT!
We are taking a week off for Christmassy Goodness, so from the Rabble to all of our faithful and devoted idiots – Thanks and have a Merry Whateverthef*ck.
G’night all.
