The Impact Short Form, 12.21.06

Columns, Reviews, Shows, TV Shows

Oh, it’s time to play catch-up. Thanks to a twenty-eight hour working day, I’m running quite far behind right now. So, I’ll hit Impact prior to going to work, then Smackdown and that promised Joe Barbera obit afterward (sleep between optional at this point), then try to knock out the DVD review that I owe the site (the book review that I owe them can actually wait a couple of weeks thanks to appropriate timing). Thank God Fleabag woke me up with a well-timed phone call. I would have never got up at all, frankly. Over a day straight driving all over Chicagoland in a f*cking pouring rainstorm on the two busiest travel days of the year…yeah, pleasant.

And my knee’s been killing me for over a week now. I have GOT to get a doctor out here, although all he’s going to do is give me more Vicodin, and I still have a good supply of that. Preexisting condition clauses tend to screw me here.

Well, let me just get this done so I can get out, grab the paperwork that I need to get so I can submit it, then “enjoy” the holiday “weekend” (“enjoy” placed in quotes because I have to deal with my mother on Saturday, and “weekend” placed in quotes because I have to be back at work at 3:30 on Tuesday morning instead of Tuesday night as I’d be if I had a full three days off; life truly does blow)…

Match Results:

Sting over Frankie Kazarian (Pinfall, Scorpion Death Drop): The match was too short to be anything. Besides, no one cared about the match. We just wanted to see the beating by Raven afterward.

Frankie flies. Sting’s not impressed.

The ex-Buh Buh Ray Dudley and the ex-D-Von Dudley over Chase Stevens and Andy Douglas, Tables Match (Douglas put through table): Well, it’s said that TNA’s grown very cold on the Naturals, citing a lack of work ethic among other things. To tell the truth, if you’ve been treated like the Naturals have lately, would you have any work ethic left? And as for their inability to get over, how about giving them an actual opportunity to get over instead of the hot-cold approach that’s been used on them for the last year and a half? The reason Douglas took the table shot here is because TNA supposedly has a worse opinion of him than of Stevens. In fact, they’re so down on the Naturals that Shane Douglas was separated from them to restore his reputation. That’s saying a lot, isn’t it?

Look behind you

A. J. Fuckin’ Styles and and Samoa Fuckin’ Joe over Kurt Fuckin’ Angle and Rhinyo…how do I append “Fuckin'” as a cognomen of quality to someone with one name? (Pinfall, Styles pins Rhiyno, rollup): I was looking forward to this match. Then when it began, I noticed the time indicator on my video player which noted that there was only five minutes left in the show. That kinda killed the mood right there. I wouldn’t have bitched if it was ten minutes or so. Fifteen would have been really nice. But a match with this kind of firepower given only five minutes? That throws it straight into PPV Pimp territory, and you know what that means.

It’s Rhiyno’s expression that really makes this screen cap

Angle Developments:

A pogo stick contest, Sheremetyevo beating up Santa Spike, anti-smoking pimps…really, there’s nothing I want to discuss regarding this show.

Okay, I have to get to work. More from me after I get back.