Spaulding's Best Of 2006

Features

2006 what a year of ups and downs for the theatrical business eh? Ok, I know I’m not a movie reviewer for theatrical releases, but I just don’t have the time to get out there as often as I’d like. But being a DVD reviewer, I still catch all the top, and worst, films of the year. And I do mean “all” as my collection of 1200 DVD’s continues to grow. Now I do have a soft spot for the horror world so it was a generally good year for terror with Hostel and The Hills Have Eyes; yet there were many films from each genre that deserve to be recognized for their greatness.

Some films are meaningful but one can’t quite classify them on a list for some reason. Guilty pleasures, emotional wrenches and films that are warranting special mention deserve special recognition in any film awards ceremony. Major Film Festivals give films that deserve attention but didn’t qualify for any rewards a “Jury Prize,” and as such these are the films that deserve one for 2006.

Jackass Number Two

I have always found the humor of the guys from Jackass absolutely fantastic, but only when they are all together. Sure Bam’s show and Steve-O and Pontius going off on their own were humorous, but nowhere near the hilarity that the entire crew could produce. I had my doubts after a six year layoff, but they truly gave a quality performance, just not one that constituted a movie with an enjoyable storyline since this was just skits. Still to see Dunn brand a penis onto Bam’s ass is one I could never forget.

Cars

Really had no desire to see this movie for the longest time no matter how much of a Disney fanatic I am. The two reasons that made that season so are because I hate NASCAR and absolutely despise Larry The Cable Guy, even just his voice. Through no desire of my own, I ended up watching it and found out three more things. The movie really has virtually nothing to do with NASCAR, Larry is not in it enough to piss me off, and the movie is just outright funny.

Candy

Not many people saw this movie, nor even heard of it, but I found it to be a good look into the life of a crackhead. If something bad happens in a film and I really end up feeling sorry for the character, then the actors did a good job of pulling me into the story. Heath Ledger and Abbie Cornish sincerely made me feel so bad for them and the things they had to go through just to score some drugs that I almost wanted to hold an intervention for them.

Some films are great movies but were just not great enough to be one of the best films of the year. Recognizing that there were more than just 10 films to see in 2006, these are the films that were great but just not quite great enough to warrant inclusion on the absolute best films of the year.

16 Blocks

Any movie that can keep me on the edge of my seat is something that I’m going to enjoy no matter what the plot may be. I say that simply do to the lack of creativity seen in the film world the past decade so Bruce Willis managed to keep me antsy and fidgety as he tried to get Mos Def just down the damn street, and I liked that. There wasn’t much to the story. Simple and easy to follow yet kept me interested and I don’t see that very often anymore.

Little Miss Sunshine

This film honestly is as good as everyone raving about it says it is. It has some great tender moments of sensitivity and touching family times. It has some hilarious scenes and fantastic one-liners from Steve Carell. And I’m just going to say it as dysfunctional as the family is, I can’t help but watch them and think of my own and know we are just as close in weird sorts of ways. Problem is, it was just really missing something and I felt unfulfilled when it was all over, but not sure why.

Lucky Number Slevin

Here we go with another simple movie. I know what you’re going to say is that it was more complicated then anything released this year, but not to me. A man who is the subject of mistaken identity and everyone is gunning for him, so what does he do? He tries to get them before they do him in. I love it. Almost like an old fashioned who-dunnit murder mystery of who is going to get busted next and we just don’t see enough of that anymore. My only real beef is that I was reminded of Sin City repeatedly while watching and it just didn’t sit right with me, so that knocked it out of the Top 10.

Slither

Slither did what no other horror film has done in a long time and that’s brought me back to a time when horror and comedy mixed together very well, ala Nightmare On Elm Street 4. Sure the movies weren’t the best in the world and they weren’t exceedingly frightening, but they had their moments and threw in a nice mixture of cheesy laughs.

The Descent

Alright, the movie was not really the best in the world, but it brought to me a story that I truly enjoyed. I like just about anything that takes place in dark caverns except of course for The Cave. I love the echoes, the darkness, and the fact that in every scene everything is wet. I know I’m weird, but that’s been obvious. Throw in friends who are turning on one another instead of banding together against horrible creatures and its controversy all over the place. And Lord knows I love controversy, so The Descent could have been done so much better, but it amused me for a little while.

Clerks II

Like Jackass, I was wondering just how good this film would be after such a long layoff. But again like Jackass, I was pleasantly surprised and happy with the final result. Kevin Smith did the best thing any write/director can do when it comes to making a sequel getting back all the original actors to play the characters from the first. This just couldn’t be called Clerks if Dante and Randal were played by anyone but Brian O’Halloran and Jeff Anderson. Veering from Smith’s other films; this one not only had sick humor and stupid scenes but a very touching story thrown into the mix of drug usage and beastiality.

Silent Hill

A fan of the game series and also being yet another horror movie, I was looking forward to this one. I will say that as a fan of the game I was very impressed with happy with what was presented. The way the story was presented and how well done the villains (enemies) from the game were designed really made this an enjoyable film to sit through. While not a horror movie to be categorized as a “classic,” it is one I can and will watch over and over again.

The Da Vinci Code

One of the movies I anticipated the most this year ended up being, I won’t say disappointing but just wasn’t what I was hoping for. 99% of the time a novel is going to be better then its movie counterpart, and that again holds true here. I was just so excited to finally see Robert Langdon and all the cool secrets come to life before my eyes, but so much had to be cut from the book in order to make it a feasible length that all I could do was nitpick. I hated doing that too because it really is a good movie, but here is where literacy took

Greatness always comes in limited quantities, and in any cinematic year narrowing it down to just 10 films is nearly impossible. After much debate and changes over the last 365 days, here are the best films of 2006.

10.)


Hostel

I was excited for this film from the moment I saw the first trailer on the internet. Eli Roth was teaming with the master himself, Quentin Tarentino, to bring forth a movie of nothing but gruesome, horrific, stomach turning, beautiful scenes of torture. Then the film started out with twenty minutes of softcore porn. And then the camera would cut away right when a toe was to be clipped off. Those are only a few complaints, but they are what make the film so low on the Top 10 ladder. Still the film gave lots of great shots and some armrest clenching moments that I will never forget.

9.)


The Hills Have Eyes

Did we really need another remake? Again, did we really need another remake that was almost exactly the same as original? Even close to being word for word? The answer to all of those after viewing the new version of The Hills Have Eyes is a resounding “yes!” I had forgotten just how creepy and grotesque this film really was until seeing this new incarnation of it in theatres. Not many movies make me feel incredibly uncomfortable and just downright uneasy like some of the scenes did, especially the one in the RV after the mother is killed. You all know which one I’m talking about.

8.)


Lady In The Water

M. Night Shyamalan made this film as a jab at those who rejected his scripts, those who ripped on The Village, and all those who said he couldn’t ever again make a film that comes close to his masterful The Sixth Sense. If he wasn’t going for his best work, then he succeeded; but I still enjoyed the hell out of it. Shyamalan kept the creepiness of his movies alive in this film and kept it creative. Sure there wasn’t much realistic at all in Lady but it’s a movie. It’s not supposed to be realistic, and that is what his biggest critics said about it. I like that it is a fairytale come to life with some danger and eeriness thrown into it. I was able to believe for a little while that all the stories we hear as children could one day possibly in front of our eyes.

7.)


Saw III

We know the twists. We know the premise of the entire movie. We know that there is going to be blood and scenes that make us cover both eyes but still peek between our fingers. Then why the hell do the movies continue to entertain me? Because they work. The third movie (so far) and they have continued to not get better, but stay consistent. Sure it’s generally the same idea that we’ve seen twice before, but the gadgets that Jigsaw keeps coming up with to kill people intrigues the hell out of me. Anything that goes around someone’s neck is going to make me squirm. Amanda does a great job as Jigsaw’s apprentice and it’s so much better now seeing her actually enjoy her work instead of disguising it as she did in part II.

6.)


Winter Passing

It seems that a subplot to this year would have to be dysfunctional families, but I’ll bet here is another film that many of you may have never heard of. Bet you also didn’t know that Will Ferrell is in it, but that’s because he actually acts like a calm human being here and kind of just blends in without taking center stage. Ed Harris plays a great drunk who just doesn’t give a single damn about himself and that is blatantly obvious. The characters here are all incredibly depressing and bring nothing but a downer to almost the entire movie, but you can tell that there is a deeper story they are working towards and that’s what makes this movie special. The ability to show a family can not only be dysfunctional but also extremely distant and still somehow find a way to work towards being quasi-normal again.

5.)


Brick

As someone who is almost ten years out of high school now, I can very clearly recall what everyday of all four years was like. There was every clique imaginable ranging from the potheads all the way up to the jocks and then to the smart kids to student council and so on. I had always wondered what it would be like to experience each and every one and see what they were like and if I was in the right group of peers. Joseph Gordon-Levitt really plays the part of the loner teen detective phenomenally well and shows that it’s possible to figure out anything you could want to as long as you try and put your entire self into it.

4.)


United 93

I originally had no intention of watching this film or World Trade Center or When The Levees Broke because I really did not want to relive tragedies that I had seen news footage of for countless hours, but I cracked. I got United 93 and I decided to give it a shot one night as I was in bed and figured I’d fall asleep halfway through. Almost two hours later I was still awake, sitting up in my bed, and staring in awe as the credits rolled. An extremely frightening film that was created in a very respectful and eerily real way, United 93 delivered exactly what I didn’t expect it too and that makes the film very well done.

3.)


Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

Finally a little bit of fun and cheeriness to this list eh? There is nothing that can be said about Pirates 2 other then it was phenomenal. Johnny Depp brought the role of Captain Jack Sparrow to an even higher level of hilarity and just plain enjoyment. And as I’ve said before, Disney did the best thing for a sequel in getting all the actors back to play the same parts from the first. A movie that fits well into the middle of this almost completed trilogy, but could stand just as well all by itself, it was quite possibly one of my most enjoyable experiences in a theatre all year.

2.)


Hard Candy

Thinking about hooking up with someone you meet online? Take a look at this film before you do and you may just think twice about it. Here we have a young girl who is portrayed as being fourteen years old and meeting up with an older man she talked to over the internet. Things then really take a turn for the worse as the whole movie I could not tell who was actually in the wrong or who to feel sorry for. I love to be kept guessing and that is exactly what I get from Hard Candy, but hell if I didn’t also get some moments where I was mentally and physically uncomfortable. To all the males out there just be forewarned, it’s not pretty. That’s all I’m gonna say.

1.)


Superman Returns

I am a huge Superman fanatic. It’s no secret and the fact that I own the Superman DVD collections (4-disc and 14-disc), Superman Returns 2-disc set, and all three seasons of Superman: The Animated Series is merely a small amount of proof how much I am obsessed with the big guy in red and blue. I mean I won’t even count the nine shirts, two hats, and Supes dogtag I wear at all times…BUT my bias is not the only reason he landed at number one. It’s because I really think the movie was that good. Brandon Routh made me feel as if I was watching the late, great Christopher Reeve on screen again; especially when he was Clark Kent. Kevin Spacey almost sold me as Lex Luthor more then Gene Hackman did and that’s saying a lot. Then there was Parker Posey as Miss Kitty adding some great one-liners and humor that was needed to break up all the seriousness.

I love the story, I loved the way the characters were portrayed, and even though there were some history/story inconsistencies it’s a movie, there’s bound to be some of that in any film. It just was fantastic from start to finish and kept me intrigued all the way in between. Superman did indeed fly again in 2006 and he did it in the best film of the year.