I consider myself Inside Pulse’s resident Broadway expert for two reasons: 1) I like musicals and 2) I’m the only one here who ever writes about them. As such, I volunteered to cover the new NBC reality show Grease: You’re The One That I Want. The difficulty here is three-fold, for me. One, I don’t like Grease (and not in a trendy, “I hate everything popular” kind of way. I just dislike the music and Olivia Newton-John). Two, I hate blatant rip-offs (Broadway Idol). And three, I’m working on being a Broadway Snob (may or may not be a problem). This show is a blatant rip-off, taking shooting, hosting, and judging all directly from American Idol. In it’s defense, it really doesn’t pretend to be anything otherwise. But, while American Idol gives the winner a million dollar recording contract, Grease promises the winner one of the two lead roles in the Broadway revival of Grease, opening August 16, 2007 on Broadway. The question: can Broadway be won over as easily as 13-year old girls?
The Format
If you’ve seen Idol, you’ve seen this show. Hopefuls sing in front of three judges. The judges pass the good singers on to Day Two. On day two, the average to great singers must prove they are semi-competent dancers. Those who can sing and dance go on to Hollywood, Dawg “Grease Academy”. After Grease Academy, twelve (crazy!) performers will move on to the “Live Performance” round where America will vote on who will get the lead roles of Danny and Sandy on Broadway’s latest Grease revival.
I’m sure the New York Times Broadway Snobs will just love this.
The Judges
The show’s three judges make a bit more sense than Idol’s. All of them are connected to the show somehow and two of the three will have their butts on the line if the show fails.
Jim Jacobs: The guy who wrote the original show’s book, music, and lyrics. According to IBDB (yes, there’s an IBDB) Jacobs is a Broadway One-shot whose only success came with this show. If you got to have a one-shot, it may as well be one of the biggest shows of all time. Jacobs is the man who originally visualized the characters (loosely based on folks he went to high school with) and he’s there to provide that input. Presuming the writing and music credit on Grease is for real, he’s probably there to provide voice input as well.
Kathleen Marshall: Filling the role of token chick judge is Kathleen Marshall, director of the final product. Her Broadway credits include choreography for Little Shop Of Horrors, 1776, and Kiss Me Kate‘s revival and director of Wonderful Town and The Pajama Game. The Pajama Game was famous for casting Harry Connick Jr. and not much else.
David Ian: Rounding out the judges and filling the standard role of “Snarky British Judge” is the man whom, according to the show, mortgaged himself to the hilt to fund the original London showing of Grease. His only Broadway credit is two month run of the musicalized version of Saturday Night Fever but, according to his Wikipedia page, he is “the most powerful man in UK theatre”. He will be putting up the money for the production.
The judges will add an interesting dynamic to this show. In American Idol, the only person who, originally, had anything on the line was Simon. Paula and Randy were added for actually, I have no idea what they were added for. In this show, the judges all have input into the final show. The writer knows the character better than anyone, the director who has to manage these messes, and the producer who is, supposedly, staking ten million dollars and his reputation. Whereas Paula, Randy, and Simon really have no stake in what happens to the contestants on American Idol, the viewer is led to believe all of the judges on Grease have something to lose. It’s an interesting dynamic and one that will likely lead to conflict later on.
The Hosts
To differentiate itself from Idol, Grease has taken the bold step of having TWO hosts. Hold on to your burritos, folks.
Billy Bush: The Ryan Seacrest knockoff. Much like Ryan, I have no idea what this guy is going to bring to the table.
Denise Van Outen: Apparently employed to interact with the contestants, Van Outen was a former musical theater actress who was passed over for a part in Grease by David Ian. Good times.
In the first show, the two hosts filled the role of “people who described the tough times the contestants had to get to the audition.” They also were able to record “thrill of victory” and “agony of defeat.”
The Show
More or less sticking with the theme of blatantly copying American Idol, the special “90-Minute Premiere” Episode shows the first auditions in Los Angeles and Chicago (the birthplace of Grease). The first part is familiar; lines of people wait outside for a chance to perform in front of the judges. After passing muster with their voice, they pass on to the dance audition the next day. The choreographer puts together an easy routine that the contestants are asked to learn in an hour and then asked to perform in front of the judges. The judges then decide who goes on to Grease Academy. Grease Academy will probably be the show’s heavy drama as people try to learn to dance while singing in key. This is probably where we’ll get the most tears and the “this was my dream and I can’t handle it” tantrums. I also appreciate the shameless attempt to create a catchphrase for this show, with the Snarky British Judge dismissing people with “You Are Not Danny” or “You Are Not Sandy” depending on who gets dismissed or “You’re the one that we want” if they pass to the next round.
Should the show make it to the live performance part, I’m interested to see the format. I also can’t wait to see Broadway Critics roll out their finest smug to crucify this show, regardless of quality.
The Bad
I was going to attempt to get through this without making my hatred for Grease an issue, but it’s relevant. Since at least half of the people trying out for the show know how to go to an audition, most of them prepare songs from the show itself. This lends itself to repetitiveness as most of the women seem to go for There Are Worse Things I Could Do. On Idol, the people who know what they’re doing pick a song that’s best for them and sing it. On this show, the people who know what they’re doing do the same thing, except if they really know what they’re doing, they choose one of the songs from the musical.
And, this problem is only going to get worse. No matter how the live part of this show gets formatted, the contestants are going to have to perform numbers from the musical. If they force them to ALL perform the same numbers in the same night, it’s going to be a nightmare of boring. If they all perform different numbers on different nights, you won’t get fair voting. If they perform numbers from other musicals (the all-important “song choice” from American Idol) they likely won’t get the practice they need to open the show on Broadway by August.
Secondly, I can see where the dancing audition will be incredibly boring for the home audience. In fairness, the show itself apparently realized this as the dancing auditions are glossed over. They’re mentioned in passing as “this is something the contestants are going to need to learn how to do to win” while being shown in a five-minute montage. Really, the dancing is going to come across a distant third after their look and their pipes. If they’re remotely competent, they’ll get passed through. It’s easier to teach dance than singing in tune.
Thirdly, look is going to be more important in this show than Idol. We know a few things about the final twelve already. If the girl is overweight or old, she’s not going to get cast as a hot high school student. This was proven even on the first show, as the girl who was the best singer and spent time as a dancer was passed over. Why? Because she’s brunette, overweight, and 30. She isn’t Sandy. The guy who played Danny in his high school musical got passed over because he’s skinny and not tough looking, evne though he knows the part cold. There’s not going to be the element of “anyone can win” because you’re not going to see an overweight black dude or a salt-and-pepper haired guy win. We know what the character is supposed to look like, so we know what the top twelve are going to look like. There’s no underdog.
Finally, the people who go to the Manhattan audition next week are going to probably define the show. This is not meant to be standard New York City smug, it’s just that this city is LOADED with musical theater majors looking for their big break. We call them waiters. If there was any notice at all about this show anywhere, the Manhattan audition is going to be packed with musical theater majors trying to get any exposure and resume building they can get their mustard-stained hands on. The musical theater majors, honestly, will likely blow away the “regular joes” who go out for this show, regardless of if they come out of Chicago, Atlanta, Las Vegas, Toronto, or anywhere else with a Broadway. The people who already know how to sing in key while bouncing around are always going to beat out people who don’t. This is another separation from Idol. Musical Theatre is not singing. Not everyone can walk in off the street and do it.
The Summary
Regardless of the four problems I foresee, I saw enough in the first episode that I’ll be back next week. I like the concept, even if I dislike the musical. I understand the selection, as it’s an easily identified musical with a movie everyone has seen. It’s also a low-risk investment for the people putting up the money. Frankly, a Grease revival is going to do just fine regardless of how they cast the roles. This show is just nationwide advertising. As much as I hate the musical, I’m tremendously interested in the process.
Whether or not it appeals to non-musical fans is the question. I’m skeptical, but I’ll be with it for the season.
