Primeval – Review

Credit: www.impawards.com

Director:

Michael Katleman

Cast:

Dominic Purcell .Tim Manfrey
Brooke Langton .Aviva Masters
Orlando Jones .Steven Johnson
Jurgen Prochnow .Jacob Krieg
Gideon Emery .Matthew Collins
Gabriel Malema .Jojo

Hollywood Pictures presents Primeval. Written by John Brancato & Michael Ferris. Rated R (for strong graphic violence, brutality, terror and language). Running time: 93 minutes.

To believe the advertising for Primeval is to believe that it is inspired by true events. This is partly true. Ads proclaim the movie to be about a serial killer who has murdered three thousand people, and has never been captured. The killer is cunning, but he is not human. So it’s, um, a non-human serial killer? Um, okay.

It turns out the killer is a crocodile. A crocodile. Why go to the trouble of marketing a monster movie as film about a serial killer in the first place? Sure, each week teenagers are looking for a quick fix of mindless entertainment. Lowbrow comedies are typically box office gold as are DTMs (Dead Teenager Movies). But, come on, it’s about a killer crocodile. Why that almost sells itself.

Unfortunately, this 20-foot long crocodile fails to go for the jugular.

The action unfolds in Burundi, and it is this location where the creature, named Gustave by the locals, hunts his prey. Of course, the rest of the world could care less. Until a white woman is mauled by the croc. Well, this tragic incident has one news agency chomping at the bit (pun intended) at wanting to cover the story. The crew is led by reluctant reporter Tim Manfrey (Prison Break‘s Dominic Purcell, who is no stranger to running away when being chased) and his cameraman-sidekick, Steven (Orlando Jones). The two venture deep into the wilds of the African nation with Aviva (Brooke Langdon), a female reporter who is trying for serious journalism; Matthew (Gideon Emery), a poor excuse for a crocodile expert; and Jacob Krieg (Jurgen Prochnow), their guide and the only one who would rather kill Gustave than capture him.

While a straight-up killer crocodile movie would be serviceable in itself, the script is sporadic with scenes involving the scaly creature. He is hidden for most of the picture. That may be a good thing, because when the computer-generated killer is revealed, you’ll laugh at how bad it comes across. If that wasn’t enough, the crocodile isn’t the only one worth booing. Murderous Hutu rebels also make their presence known. Poor Steven made the mistake of capturing one of their malicious executions on camera. And now he and the rest of the crew have two threats, no easy solutions being gorged by bloodstained molars or shot to death. It is a shame a 20-foot crocodile has to contend with rebels for screen time. He should be the supreme villain. Although, there are moments where we, as an audience, want to root for this badly executed computer-generated creature. He could kill all the rebels and the news crew and go on about his business.

As cruel as that may be, it’s not as cruel as a film not having a tangible story; the screenwriters didn’t have a clear idea of what story they wanted to tell. Genocide and how Westerners (Americans) could care less about the atrocities in Africa is exploited. Why a B-grade monster movie (which is marketed as a serial killer film) needs such a message is infuriating. It serves no purpose when supposedly a giant croc is the main attraction.

Then there’s the excuse of giving Primeval an “inspired by true events” label. Like that is supposed to put everything into perspective. The filmmakers should have scrapped the genocide message and realized a giant crocodile movie full of B-grade action; don’t-care-if-they-live-or-die characters and tasteless banter should equal mindless fun, if executed properly. Sadly, what should have been a direct-to-DVD release, or something shown on SCI-FI, somehow manages to get a multi-million dollar marketing campaign and thousands of prints in theaters. Which, to be truthful, is more unbelievable than a 20-foot long crocodile named Gustave.