Alright, now that Stargate SG-1 is over, it’s time for ECW on SciFi. That’s the sound of a thousand virgins changing the channel.
Tonight we’re dedicating the show to Mike Awesome, who hanged himself this week, which is a total shame. No jokes here about that. It’s a real shame.
We’re reminded that Lashley got himself DQ’d at No Way Out because he was way too EXTREME for a Smackdown! PPV.
Let the bodies/ratings hit the floor…
We start the show with the New Breed making their way to the ring and Elijah has the stick. HE says it wasn’t divine intervention that beat the ECW Originals last week, it was a bunch of qualities that he says the New Breed wrestlers have. Next is Striker who says that they’re going to teach the Originals a lesson. The lesson is that anyone of them can beat any Original. Tonight, it’s Kevin Thorn.
This draws out the ECW Originals of RVD, Sabu, Sandman and Dreamer. After “talking” it over, they decide it’s gonna be RVD.
Rob Van Dam over Kevin Thorn by Five Star Frog Splash
Unsurprisingly the fans are behind RVD, a local boy to SoCal. Everyone’s at ringside to watch this one. Thorn interrupts the “RVD” double thumbs which draws a nice “missed the VD part” comment from Taz. RVD attempts another double thumb, but Thorn interrupts again.
Thorn has control until RVD gets some kicks in and then clotheslines Thorn to the outside. Van Dam finally gets the double thumb and hits a plancha on Thorn outside the ring. Thorn gets into the ring, RVD gets hit by Burke on his way back into the ring, and that starts a brawl between the six wrestlers at ringside. That leads us to our first…
commercial break.
We’re back and Thorn has control and the ringside is clear for everyone except for Ariel. Both guys are tired and resorting to punches. RVD gets the better of the exchange and Thorn is out on his feet. A rolling thunder only gets a two. TWO! Thorn takes another standing kick followed by a leaping sidekick.
Then RVD hits a splash on Thorn from half way a across the ring. Impressive hang time on that one. That only gets a two as well. TWO! Thorn and RVD go back and forth with near falls until RVD hits the windmill kick followed by the frog splash and finally that gets a three count.
Post match Ariel pouts and RVD celebrates. There goes the theory that RVD was going to be distanced from this New Breed vs. ECW Originals feud.
We’re treated to another SNITSKY promo video, and if history is correct, that means that he’s on his way out during the next segment.
We’re given a short history lesson about the Money in the Bank Ladder Match because the qualifying match is next.
CM Punk over Johnny Nitro by Go to Sleep
Nitro and Melina are escorted by two paparazzi, I’m surprised they do the whole red carpet thing in ECW. Joey can’t shut the hell up about what the opportunity that MitB is. The match finally starts and CM Punk goes for a quick roll up from the opening lock up.
Back to the lockup, CM Punk gets a headlock takedown and he and Nitro go for a bit of mat wrestling. Punk gives Nitro an out while in an arm bar and Nitro goes to a headlock. Punk reverses into a dropkick. nitro throws punk to the corner and Nitro hits a springboard enziguiri.
Nitro has control and hits a few crossface forearms. Nitro only gets a two. Nitro hits a few chain moves on Punk followed by a spinning leg drop for a two. TWO! Big CM Punk chant from the crowd as Nitro still has control with a head vice. Punk battles out with some punches and misses with a kick, but Punk comes back and hits some punches and a stiff looking round kick followed by the rising knee in the corner followed by the bulldog and a double underhook back breaker. Nice. That only gets a two. TWO!
CM Punk goes for a shoulder block from the outside and gets met with Nitro’s knee, followed by another kick to the head, but that only gets a two. TWO! Nitro slaps Punk in the face while he’s down and misses a corkscrew moonsault. Punk lifts him up into a fireman’s carry position and drops him down face first on his knee and CM PUNK IS GOING TO MONEY IN THE BANK. What a surprise! That match was worth the price of admission for this one. Knee vs. face. Face rarely wins. The Go to Sleep finisher is KENTA Kobashi’s, who Punk has already modeled a lot of his offense after.
One year after being a “gangster” in Mania, CM Punk’s in an actual match.
Rebecca’s backstage with Mr. Kennedy. Kennedy is complaining that Hardcore Holly is also involved in the match. Don’t worry dude, you’re not the only one. This draws Holly who tells Kennedy that life’s not fair and ECW is Hardcore Holly’s world.
We managed to get through the match without any SNITSKY happening. And that’s… a good thing.
WHOA! La Resistance! Reunited! They’re fighting a team known as “Los Luchas”. Who?
La Resistance over Los Luchas
As Scott Keith would say… squash. DUD. Too bad for Victor Cabil and Will Flores, but those guys take-a-good bump.
Then…
SNITSKY happens all over Los Luchas. I suppose it’s better than him interrupting a match.
We get another “Lashley has no charisma” video, part three of our series. I kinda wish the guy could get his story across without needing other people to tell it for him. Its rare I’d say it, but I miss the JR sit down interviews.
I’d like to dedicate my CM Punk match results to Pulse Glazer, who is sitting on his ass this week because he’s got a vacation from teaching degenerate youth. Even though he’s not working this week, I’ll still give him a link.
It’s time for the Nitro Girls. It’s not a matter of what they’re doing, but who’s gonna interrupt them this week. I never understood the real point to cheerleaders, the Nitro Girls, the Knicks City Dancers or EXTREME Expose. I guess I’m just not into T&A on TV. They actually get to finish this week.
Joey segues to the Hall of Fame induction of Mr. Perfect for this year. His last run with WCW is ignored during this video, focusing less on Curt and more on “Mr. Perfect”.
From the Torch: Phoenix Star & Zokre of Los Luchas (who wrestle on the Southern California independent circuit) were already in the ring, but without their masks.
Bobby Lashley over Hardcore Holly & Mr. Kennedy by running powerslam on Mr. Kennedy
Lashley attacks Holly and Kennedy attacks Lashley. Kennedy and Holly fight over who’s gonna hit Lashley in the corner. That gives Lashley time to come back and hit some back elbows on the blondes. Lashley hits some shoulder blocks on Kennedy in the corner until Holly throws Lashley into the post shoulder first.
Kennedy and Lashley are locked up in the corner as Holly takes a breather, which includes the new WWE favorite move of the running boot to the face while the guy is lying down in the corner. Maybe the WWE is trying to take away the impressiveness of some of Joe’s offense? Nah, that’s just the paranoia in me talking.
Anyway, Lashley has control until bringing Kennedy outside, which gives Holly the opportunity to get some offense in while Kennedy is down and outside the ring. At 10:00 on the dot, Joey gives the rundown of the rules and the participants. Odd.
Lashley fights off both blondes including a gorilla press on Kennedy onto Holly followed by two hanging vertical suplexes. Holly drops Lashley throat first against the top rope and then gets a chair outside the ring. Holly kicks the chair into Lashley’s face and goes for the Alabama Slam and hits it. Kennedy pulls the ref out of the ring so he can’t count the three. This makes Holly PISSED like someone stole his NASCAR car. Kennedy goes for a chair shot on Lashley, but he ducks it and he hits Holly instead. Lashley hits a running powerslam on Kennedy and gets the three count.
Lashley celebrates and I yawn.
The Inside Pulse
CM Punk vs. Johnny Nitro was the best wrestling this show has seen in months. It’s a shame that there aren’t more matchups like this. This show moved stories along with some pretty good wrestling. It seems like ECW has a direction (finally) and I don’t mind it one bit.
- Rob Van Dam over Kevin Thorn by Five Star Frog Splash
- CM Punk over Johnny Nitro by Go to Sleep
- La Resistance over Los Luchas
- Bobby Lashley over Hardcore Holly & Mr. Kennedy by pinfall after a running powerslam on Mr. Kennedy
