WWE RAW IS WAR! I’M TOM PANDICH! I’M WAR!
Shawn is in the back stretching! John Cena is in the back! Stair down! Cena wishes Shawn good luck against Randy tonight. Shawn wishes Cena good luck against Edge tonight. Dueling Cena and Shawn chants. Cena is afraid that Shawn will turn on him eventually. Shawn says maybe things are different, maybe things aren’t… Cena is not put at ease by this. The feed dies and we go to commercial?
Oh, okay. We’re back.
Shawn Michaels vs Randy Orton
Randy comes out with Edge and then charges the ring. Punches to Shawn and Orton gets dropped by a reverse neck breaker. Michaels runs Orton over the top with a clothesline and Orton hits the announce table. Shawn flips Orton back in and Irish whips him into a corner. Sadly, Michaels runs into a boot and Orton follows this up with a few European uppercuts. Michaels puts a stop to this and Orton trades blows with Shawn. Orton is sick of trading though and he rakes the eyes. That doesn’t stop Shawn though as Michaels hits a knee lift, but then gets tossed outside. Okay, time for a real commercial break.
Sign guy has a commercial now. We’re back and Orton has Michaels in a Boston Crab! Good for Randy. It’s not exactly the toughest move to do, but Randy doing anything different is nice. Michaels reaches the ropes and manages to slap a sleeper on Randy. Randy tries for a side suplex but Shawn counters it into a pin for two. Michaels hits the ropes and misses the baseball slide at Edge. He gets caught coming in by Orton though and gets destroyed by a hanging DDT off the second rope. Orton tosses Shawn into the corner and hits a standing drop kick for two.
Randy slaps a side headlock on Michaels which Michaels powers out of. Michaels and Orton exchange shots, but Orton misses the clothesline and gets dropped by a side suplex. Shawn kips up and hits the moves of doom. Super kick gets caught, RKO is blocked, ref is bumped and Shawn is decapitated by a clothesline. Edge runs to get the belt but the ref was just playing possum! He catches the belt before the shot and Orton is rolled up.
Winner: Shawn Michaels
Orton is pissed and it’s a chairshot to Michaels. Poor Shawn. Cena runs to make the save. Heels bail and Cena tends to Shawn. Aww.
We’re back and Foley is pimping the book again. Last Tuesday, Lashley killed everyone. That cage spot was insanely cool. In the back, McMahon is worried. Umaga will squish a Hardy like a grape tonight. Vince says the Board of Directors will kiss the Chairman of the Board’s ass. Vince wanted the guest ref to be Shane McMahon.
Intercontinental Championship Match: Jeff Hardy vs Umaga
You almost feel bad for Jeff. Almost. Umaga pulls off the outside padding. Poor Jeffy. Jeff gets tossed into the corner but gets away. Hardy runs around Umaga and hits him and runs. Umaga no sells most of it though. Umaga hits a clothesline, and Hardy is d-e-d. Boring offense follows. Jeff gets his offense shrugged off followed by a squishing. Thumb of doom finishes it.
Winner: Umaga
Bad commentary by JR and King about Umaga follows. We get a Bobby Lashley video package.
Uh oh. Mark Cuban trash talks the Donald. Tonight, falls count anywhere for the Women’s Championship.
In the back, it’s Ric and Carlito with Todd. Tonight, they go one on one for spot #8 in the Money in the Bank ladder match. Flair is winning tonight! No wait, Carlito is winning tonight! I’m hoping Flair wins because it’s fun seeing him in a spotfest match (even though Carlito could do some madness).
Vince can’t get reception calling Shane (so he’s switching to Cingular!). Shane’s at the airport. He’s coming to the arena tonight. Vince makes another bald joke at the Coach’s lack of hair.
[i][b]Ah hell. Family emergency guys. Raw’s on TIVO. I’ll update the rest of the show later tonight.[/b][/i]
The Inside Pulse
Cena and Shawn as the page turns.
