D2 Review: Dancing with the Stars – Beauty before Rhythm

Last week, we saw the first elimination with Paulina Porizkova Ocasek. It was somewhat shocking, but since she hasn’t done a whole hell of a lot since Members Only jackets were in style, she didn’t have a current fanbase. I mean, come on, Paulina, the public hasn’t seen your beautiful mug since the 80’s when you were the face of Estee Lauder. And your husband hasn’t done ANYTHING since the 80’s. The Cars are on classic rock stations, for crying out loud. Here’s an idea, maybe you should go on a husband-wife reality show called “One of us aged better than the other”. You’d definitely win that one.

And Shandie, who are you? Does anyone other than Donald Trump watch the Miss America Pageants? If nobody knows anything about you, Sha Na Na, chances are you’re not going to last very long. It’s hard to hang in there week after week when nobody knows your name. Shannon, you’ve got the body of one of the professional dancers on the show, so maybe there was some confusion and everyone thought you were the DANCER. I don’t know.

Heather Mills hangs in there again and I think she’ll be around for quite a while with the publicity she’s been getting. And there’s some sort of sympathy vote for her like there was last year for Jerry Springer. Billy Ray might also hang on with the younger “Hanna Montana’s dad” vote. Talk about achy-breaky comebacks! And Cheryl Burke has another good shot at taking the disco ball with Ian Ziering, but I think it’ll be Joey and Leila in the finals. I got Cliff Clavin leaving next week. But what the hell do I know. Sanjaya’s not on Dancing.

Sir Linksalot: Dancing with the Stars

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