Great-ing Gimmicks of the Past: Meat

Great-ing Gimmicks of the Past: Meat – WWF, 1999

History

On the April 18, 1999 episode of Heat, Tiger Ali Singh was up to his old tricks again. Singh, who was reliving the old Million Dollar Man gimmick, was offering five hundred dollars in cash to any woman who would rub his feet. The Pretty Mean Sisters (Jacqueline (now known as TNA’s Jackie Moore) and Terri (Runnells) came out to take the money. They squabbled when Singh changed the deal to give them $250 each, but finally agreed. Suddenly a new face jumped the rail and dismantled Singh while Jacqueline and Terri held his legs. The three then left together.

On the May 6 Heat, they made their return. The newcomer was now named Meat, and he was facing off against Droz (Darren Drosdov). Meat had the advantage as Prince Albert (A-Train) started stalking Terri. Jacqueline attacked as Meat got the win. Afterward, A-Train hit the ring and pitched Meat.

Meat made his Raw debut on May 19 as he faced off against Test. He was accompanied to the ring by PMS, which had now added Ryan Shamrock to their ranks. Just as Test gained the advantage, Jacqueline attacked to draw a DQ. As she argued with the referee, Meat attacked Test again. After the match, Tori came out and attacked PMS.

A week later on Heat Meat took on Brian Christopher. Thanks to interference by PMS, Meat hit his finisher and got the win. Too Much got attacked by the Hardys afterward.

The next Heat saw Meat tagging with Jacqueline against the team of Test and Tori. Tori wound up with the win. Afterward, PMS attacked Tori while Meat kept Test occupied on the outside.

Meat took on Ken Shamrock on the next episode. Shamrock wound up winning with the ankle lock. Afterward, Jeff Jarrett showed up to attack Shamrock. After that, Steve Austin attacked Jarrett.

The night after King of the Ring, Meat took on Chaz, fresh off his run as Beaver Cleavage. Meat wound up getting pinned after being distracted by a fight between Marianna and Terri.

Meat took on Billy Gunn the next week. Billy took an easy win and PMS hit the ring to yell at Meat for losing. Chyna grabbed Jacqueline and DDT’d her while Billy did the same to Meat. Afterward, Chyna and Billy spraypainted Jackie and Meat with the DX letters.

Meat took on the Godfather the night of Fully Loaded. Meat seemed very out-of-sorts during this Heat match. Meat seemed extremely weak and the Godfather easily defeated him. After the match Terri dumped a pitcher of ice water down the front of his tights.

The next week Meat faced off against Edge. Meat seemed more into the match this week, but his mind was still somewhere else. Despite this, Meat held his own until Edge reversed his finisher and put Meat away with a spear and then the Downward Spiral. Afterward, Terri forced Meat to kiss her foot while a disgusted Jacqueline just walked away.

On the next episode of Heat, we got a glimpse of Terri and Meat backstage. Meat looked exhausted as Terri handed him a drink she’d just spiked.

Meat faced off against the Big Bossman later in the night, and the front of his tights showed exactly how happy he was to be out there. Yes, Terri had spiked the drink with Viagra. As Meat awkwardly walked into the ring, the Bossman first complained to the referee about Meat’s condition, then attacked and got a quick win.

Meat had Jeff Jarrett on the next Heat. Meat missed a splash and Jarrett took control. After Terri and Debra got into an argument on the outside, Meat was able to take advantage of the distraction and get the win. Afterward Jarrett yelled at Debra until D’Lo Brown ran in to save her.

The night after Summerslam Jeff Jarrett set up a match between Mark Henry and Meat. Suddenly we saw D’Lo destroying Meat in the back before coming out to take his place.

On the September 5th Heat, Meat had made a change. He took on Chaz with Marianna in his corner. After Marianna interfered and got Meat disqualified, Terri came out and a catfight erupted.

The next night, Michael Cole was interviewing Meat, who was talking about his father – former WWF champion Stan Stasiak. The interview ended abruptly as he was jumped by the Mean Street Posse.

The Posse took on Test, Gerald Brisco, and Pat Patterson later in the night. Test took firm control inside the ring as Meat ran down to help keep things in order on the outside. Test got an easy win.

And that was the end of the angle. Terri joined forces with the Posse, and Marianna soon disappeared completely after trying to make it look like Chaz was abusing her.

Analysis

Well, this was certainly an original idea. While it didn’t help to put Meat over as a contender, and the writers didn’t seem to have any idea where it was going, he definitely stood out on the roster.

The idea was interesting – while for years we’d had male wrestlers with scantily-dressed valets, now we had the valets taking charge. Also add in the fact that each woman involved in PMS had just split from a male wrestler, and it worked perfectly. Again, however, the writers had no idea what do with Meat after his association with PMS ended and, coupled with backstage problems, he was gone by the end of the year.

Where are they now?

Meat (Shawn Stasiak) was released from the WWF in late 1999 after being caught recording private conversations between wrestlers while backstage and traveling. He soon made his way to WCW, where he joined the New Blood and feuded with Curt Hennig while calling himself the Perfect One and PerfectShawn. A year later he had allied himself with Miss Hancock (Stacy Keibler). When the WWF purchased WCW, his contract was picked up and he soon found himself as part of the Alliance. Stasiak was injured in late 2001 and was sent to Heartland Wrestling the following February. He returned to WWF television in April on the Raw brand. Now he claimed to be from Planet Stasiak and talked to himself. Predictably, it did not get over and Stasiak was fired again in September.

After his release, Stasiak returned to school. In April of 2006 Stasiak received his doctorate in chiropractic medicine, and he now works as a chiropractor. Still, Stasiak does make occasional indy wrestling appearances.

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