The Hot Seat: J. R. Fernandez

Jeffrey R. Fernandez has been an Inside Pulse stalwart from day 1, and now heads up the offbeat Machine Gun Funk music zone. His MGF colleague Mike Eagle didn’t fair so well a few weeks ago, but JRF is confident and collected. Have you ever wondered what would happen if someone tried to SWINDLE the Hot Seat?

1) As you know, we always start out with geometry – how many sides does a Pentadecagon have?

JRF: Being a student of Latin (and a former mathlete), I know that penta is five and deca is 10. Ergo, five and ten is fifteen.

Hot Seat Judges: Excellent work and bonus points for not googling it. Although you still only get the 1 point. 1 out of 1

2)In your flagship column the Swindle Sheet, you always start out with an Opening Shot. Come up with a caption for this picture of Broken Dial’s Shawn M Smith and CM Punk:

JRF: Shawn M. Smith of Broken Dial recently got a chance to sit down and interview ECW’s CM Punk. Needless to say, the exchange turned sour after a mere thirty seconds, after it was unfortunately revealed that CM Punk is a fan of Kevin Federline. Shawn is still walking with a limp.

Hot Seat Judges: Always points for descriptions of additional injuries to SMS 2 out of 2

3) With WWE heading into the draft this Monday on Raw, there could be a lot of change on all three brands. While there was no official WWE-wide draft in 2006, there was a mini draft with Paul Heyman allowed to draft one wrestler each from Raw and Smackdown to join the new ECW. Which 2 wrestlers did Heyman draft to ECW?

JRF: I stopped watching WWE professionally after the botched Invasion angle, but I still catch the occasional show here and there. That said, I’m not certain, but I’m going to guess The Big Show and Kurt Angle, because they were both pretty much with the ECW brand from its re-inception and were not ECW originals.

Hot Seat Judges: Half right – Angle was indeed drafted from Smackdown but Heyman drated RVD from Raw. Interestingly WWE.com lists RVD but not Angle in their draft history article. 2 out of 3

4) With major candies coming out with alternate and limited edition varieties every month (check out Candy For Dinner to see them pictured), put the following alternate candy bar coatings in order of appropriateness, from most to least appropriate: a) dark chocolate b) white chocolate c) peanut butter coating d) milk chocolate e) Cherry Chocolate

JRF: What the hell is cherry chocolate? Cherry flavored chocolate, or chocolate with pieces of cherry in it? Either way, it sounds like too much of a mess to work on a large scale. Milk chocolate is a classic and has shown it has staying power, so it’s first. Dark chocolate also has a steady fanbase, so it’s second. White chocolate, while not nearly as popular as the other two, has long been a delicacy and is showing that it can hold its own among supermarket candy brands, so it would be third, followed by peanut butter and that cherry chocolate abomination.

Hot Seat Judges: A well put together list. We might have switched dark and white chocolate, but only a minor infraction 3 out of 4

5) And finally, speaking of George Michael, what are your 3 favorite Wham! songs?

JRF: How do you figure out whether or not I get the point based on this? It’s a matter of opinion, Widro. First you steal Dana Suzanne from me and now this. I see how it is. This is the question that ensures that no one gets a perfect five, because it’s subjective. That’s it, folks… the game is fixed! You heard it here first! But I digress, and I am going with three hits in (1) “Everything She Wants”, (2) “Careless Whisper”, (3) “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”

Hot Seat Judges: Down deep, everyone’s favorite Wham! song is Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. So do you get the point for this question? no-no 3 out of 5

Jeffrey R Fernandez sat down on the Hot Seat with confidence and creativity, and held up strong with 3 out of 5, notwithstanding his questioning of the very core of Hot Seat judging in question 5. You can catch JRF many times weekly in Machine Gun Funk.

Next week we have Rob Blatt making his return, in the meantime check out how Blatt did Last time in the Hot Seat

2007 Hot Seat Results
Friday June 8 – Jeffrey R Fernandez – 3 out of 5
Friday June 1 – Gregory Wind – 3 out of 5
Friday May 25 – Mike Eagle – 2 out of 5
Friday May 18 – Eric S – 4 out of 5
Friday May 11 – Steve Murray – 2 out of 5
Friday May 4 – Danny Cox – 2 out of 5
Friday March 2 – Kevin Wong – 0 out of 5
Friday February 23 – Scott “Kubryk” Sawitz – 3 out of 5
Friday February 16 – Gordi Whitelaw – 3 out of 5
Friday February 2 – Shawn M Smith – 1 out of 5

Jonathan Widro is the owner and founder of Inside Pulse. Over a decade ago he burst onto the scene with a pro-WCW reporting style that earned him the nickname WCWidro. Check him out on Twitter for mostly inane non sequiturs

Jeffrey R. Fernandez has been an Inside Pulse stalwart from day 1, and now heads up the offbeat Machine Gun Funk music zone. His MGF colleague Mike Eagle didn’t fair so well a few weeks ago, but JRF is confident and collected. Have you ever wondered what would happen if someone tried to SWINDLE the Hot Seat?

1) As you know, we always start out with geometry – how many sides does a Pentadecagon have?

JRF: Being a student of Latin (and a former mathlete), I know that penta is five and deca is 10. Ergo, five and ten is fifteen.

Hot Seat Judges: Excellent work and bonus points for not googling it. Although you still only get the 1 point. 1 out of 1

2)In your flagship column the Swindle Sheet, you always start out with an Opening Shot. Come up with a caption for this picture of Broken Dial’s Shawn M Smith and CM Punk:

JRF: Shawn M. Smith of Broken Dial recently got a chance to sit down and interview ECW’s CM Punk. Needless to say, the exchange turned sour after a mere thirty seconds, after it was unfortunately revealed that CM Punk is a fan of Kevin Federline. Shawn is still walking with a limp.

Hot Seat Judges: Always points for descriptions of additional injuries to SMS 2 out of 2

3) With WWE heading into the draft this Monday on Raw, there could be a lot of change on all three brands. While there was no official WWE-wide draft in 2006, there was a mini draft with Paul Heyman allowed to draft one wrestler each from Raw and Smackdown to join the new ECW. Which 2 wrestlers did Heyman draft to ECW?

JRF: I stopped watching WWE professionally after the botched Invasion angle, but I still catch the occasional show here and there. That said, I’m not certain, but I’m going to guess The Big Show and Kurt Angle, because they were both pretty much with the ECW brand from its re-inception and were not ECW originals.

Hot Seat Judges: Half right – Angle was indeed drafted from Smackdown but Heyman drated RVD from Raw. Interestingly WWE.com lists RVD but not Angle in their draft history article. 2 out of 3

4) With major candies coming out with alternate and limited edition varieties every month (check out Candy For Dinner to see them pictured), put the following alternate candy bar coatings in order of appropriateness, from most to least appropriate: a) dark chocolate b) white chocolate c) peanut butter coating d) milk chocolate e) Cherry Chocolate

JRF: What the hell is cherry chocolate? Cherry flavored chocolate, or chocolate with pieces of cherry in it? Either way, it sounds like too much of a mess to work on a large scale. Milk chocolate is a classic and has shown it has staying power, so it’s first. Dark chocolate also has a steady fanbase, so it’s second. White chocolate, while not nearly as popular as the other two, has long been a delicacy and is showing that it can hold its own among supermarket candy brands, so it would be third, followed by peanut butter and that cherry chocolate abomination.

Hot Seat Judges: A well put together list. We might have switched dark and white chocolate, but only a minor infraction 3 out of 4

5) And finally, speaking of George Michael, what are your 3 favorite Wham! songs?

JRF: How do you figure out whether or not I get the point based on this? It’s a matter of opinion, Widro. First you steal Dana Suzanne from me and now this. I see how it is. This is the question that ensures that no one gets a perfect five, because it’s subjective. That’s it, folks… the game is fixed! You heard it here first! But I digress, and I am going with three hits in (1) “Everything She Wants”, (2) “Careless Whisper”, (3) “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”

Hot Seat Judges: Down deep, everyone’s favorite Wham! song is Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. So do you get the point for this question? no-no 3 out of 5

Jeffrey R Fernandez sat down on the Hot Seat with confidence and creativity, and held up strong with 3 out of 5, notwithstanding his questioning of the very core of Hot Seat judging in question 5. You can catch JRF many times weekly in Machine Gun Funk.

Next week we have Rob Blatt making his return, in the meantime check out how Blatt did Last time in the Hot Seat

2007 Hot Seat Results
Friday June 8 – Jeffrey R Fernandez – 3 out of 5
Friday June 1 – Gregory Wind – 3 out of 5
Friday May 25 – Mike Eagle – 2 out of 5
Friday May 18 – Eric S – 4 out of 5
Friday May 11 – Steve Murray – 2 out of 5
Friday May 4 – Danny Cox – 2 out of 5
Friday March 2 – Kevin Wong – 0 out of 5
Friday February 23 – Scott “Kubryk” Sawitz – 3 out of 5
Friday February 16 – Gordi Whitelaw – 3 out of 5
Friday February 2 – Shawn M Smith – 1 out of 5

Jonathan Widro is the owner and founder of Inside Pulse. Over a decade ago he burst onto the scene with a pro-WCW reporting style that earned him the nickname WCWidro. Check him out on Twitter for mostly inane non sequiturs