Richly Deserved: Pirate Master Episode 1-3

Morning dawns. Louie is out for revenge. The division between Joe Don and the crew widens.

Jupiter decides to get the crew more into the spirit by doing a little face-painting. Laurel feels living in a van made her a good pirate (uh, o.k.). Alexis wasn’t having fun with the work.

The pirates come to the deck. Cameron gives them their next expedition. Jay opens it and there’s something about secret codes on rocks in blood. Captain Joe Don and officers Cheryl and Ben are on the black team. Louie is on the red team and he is motivated. Azmyth is also in red.

They row to shore (to Kendra’s obvious delight, I’m sure). The black boat had a rough spot and had to be pushed a ways. Though it seemed Alexis didn’t feel like pushing and walked toward shore away from the group.

The black crew had more legs through the path towards the sabotage point, well, all except Alexis who slowed the group down. The red team arrived at the sabotage point first.

Joe Don got through the tower of bamboo but then it crashed down, and though everyone got through, red built a big lead. From there, it was on to the river where they had to swim across to get to the next clue, dig below to get a skull with the key to the treasure, and a short run to a waterfall where Louie and Azmyth, along with the always-trying Nessa, fight the waterfall and get the treasure.

So it’s time for Joe Don and mates to give up their roles and rejoin the crew. The treasure of $35,000 is to be divided between a new captain, unanimously selected to be Azmyth, and officers Jupiter and Jay.

In the captain’s quarters, Azmyth puts his hat and coat on, and then puts on an English accent which was annoying to Jay, but was not as annoying as Ed Sanders on National Bingo Night.

Azmyth, unlike Joe Don, convinced his officers to share the loot equally with the crew. So starting with Nessa, they come in one by one for their Christmas bonus. Christa was also annoyed by the accent.

Time to give some black spots. The biggest argument came when Azmyth suggested Joe Don. Jay, still in JD’s back pocket, suggests Cheryl instead and Azmyth goes with it.

Louie clearly wants Cheryl out. Jay tries to make this happen even to the point of bribing Sean with $1000. Sean wanted Alexis out but with the money, he can’t go against Jay’s wishes, right? Joe Don also worked the group trying to get rid of Alexis to save Cheryl.

Time for Piratal Council (refer to last week’s column). Azmyth spoke in his accent to Cameron’s shock and a little laughter. Azmyth said Alexis has an attitude. Laurel, he thought, floated through expeditions. Cheryl, he said, didn’t interact with the crew. Jay said Cheryl distanced herself from the crew.

Alexis said she hasn’t put up any front and that what you see is what you get. Laurel said she wants to stay and loves the expeditions. Cheryl said this is about teamwork and said being an officer by surprise meant she couldn’t connect. Joe Don piped up and said he was responsible for Cheryl not mixing with the crew but that she was solid. Alexis and Joe Don got into a minor exchange. Azmyth said morale is way up.

It is … time to vote. The dagger gets stacked. Laurel is safe. The vote ends a 4-4 tie. Sean didn’t honor Jay’s request. So Cameron asks the captain to cast the deciding vote. He sends … Alexis! Cheryl managed to make her district attourney training work for her. Jay and Louie are in disbelief. Joe Don has a grin on his face. And so he should. Alexis floats away, proud of her time on the ship.

Next week, a twist. Mark Burnett? This is just the first season of the show! What do you need to put a twist out there for already?

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