The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – October 12 1985
– Thankfully they finally jump ahead past the filler of fall, into the REAL good stuff. For those wondering, about the only thing of note we’re missing as a result is Terry Taylor ending Black Bart’s National title reign.
– Hosted by Tony & David
– And the shit is going DOWN right away this week, as the Russians attack Ric Flair in the aftermath of Flair’s defense against Nikita Koloff in a steel cage, but Dusty Rhodes makes the save.
– We begin with Tully & Arn, two years they became Tully & Arn, come out swinging against Dusty Rhodes, as Arn claims that he’s the new TV champion because Dusty can’t defend now, although we don’t know why yet.
– Jimmy Valiant v. Tony Zane. Usual goofy squash from Jimmy, as he beats on the jobber and tosses him, then sends him into the post. Back in, elbow and elbow finish at 1:01.
– Thunderfoot v. Brady Boone. I don’t really recall Thunderfoot ever being a single, but I’m assuming it’s still Joel Deaton. He slams Boone and catches him with a lariat out of the corner, then elbows him down into a butterfly suplex. Tony speculates that the boot might be loaded. Well, geez, his name is THUNDERFOOT, ya think? He tosses Boone, loads up the boot, and finishes with a kick at 1:55. Well, Boone would at least go on to some minor fame in the WWF.
– So back to the cage match, as Flair wins the match against Nikita and suffers a pretty hellacious beatdown as a result. Dusty saves, and we cut away again as Tony & David point out that Dusty has done nothing against Flair. Oh, stop teasing me!
– Ole Anderson v. Brody Chase. Ole quickly takes him down with an armbar and pounds on that arm. Hammerlock slam and elbowdrop get two, but Ole picks him up. Up top for the flying knee to the shoulder, and the armbar ends it at 2:02.
– Superstar Billy Graham v. Randy Barber. Graham is out of his ninja phase and into his tie-dye phase, where he would end his career. Graham overpowers Barber and stomps him down, then snapmares him into a neck vice. I think I preferred him when he was doing “martial arts” and wearing a gi. Inverted body vice finishes at 3:06.
– Wahoo McDaniel v. Gene Ligon. Wahoo takes him down with a headlock and works off that, then throws the chops to set up a backbreaker for two. He holds a chinlock, but Ligon fights back, so Wahoo chops him down and finishes at 3:29. Well, geez, good thing they pulled that from the other show to show us.
– OK, so back to the big story, as we pick things up with Dusty chasing the Russians out of the ring, but instead of taking Dusty’s hand, Flair calls the Andersons in for the sneak-attack, and he locks the door to allow Ole & Arn maximum damage. And just for fun, Flair comes off the top and breaks Dusty’s leg, and then puts him in the figure-four for good measure. It turns into a mob scene as all the faces try to break into the cage to save Dusty, and the Andersons keep fighting them off, and it turns into a gigantic brawl, with the Andersons & Flair finally escaping (and nearly getting killed by fans on the way to the back, apparently). Molten heat for this one, which sets up two big things: The main event of Starrcade 85, and the formal alignment of Ric Flair with the Andersons into the group that would become the Four Horsemen. David’s commentary during the medical attention is hilarious, as he’s shown on the video with a big bag of ice and he’s like “Well, with any injury, you’ve gotta go ahead and put ice on it.” Maybe THAT’S James Andrews’ secret! With no real medical attention forthcoming, the ring crew goes ahead with dismantling the cage and ring while Dusty is still trying to sell a broken leg.
– World Six-Man titles: The Russians v. Don Kernodle, Ron Garvin & Pez Whatley. Big brawl to start and the faces make the dirty Commies back off. Garvin gets powered into the corner, but sneaks out of the ring to escape. Khrushchev tries to slam him, but Pez dropkicks them over and Garvin gets two off it. Former sympathizer turned patriot Kernodle comes in and works a headlock on Khrusher, and Pez follows suit. Koloff comes in, but also gets faced with a series of headlocks as we take a break. We return and the match is over, with the Russians having apparently won. I guess the tape machines weren’t rolling after all.
– Jim Crockett announces that next week is Tully defending the US title against Ron Bass, but Ric Flair interrupts, looking for competition. Crockett confronts him about the video, but Flair just totally ignores him and goes on complaining.
– Tully Blanchard v. Mike Nichols. Tully wrestles him down and then throws forearms and a knee to stun him. Nichols fights back in the corner, but another kneelift ends that, and the slingshot suplex puts him out of his misery at 1:37.
– Magnum doesn’t find anything humorous about Dusty getting beaten to within an inch of his life. Well obviously he’s not trying hard enough.
– Back to Flair, as he’s still not answering any questions about the incident, and chooses to badmouth Tony and David instead. Really, he already answered the question in the last show: He told Dusty that he didn’t need help with the Russians, and thus not to interfere. David gets REALLY worked up and he’s all in Flair’s face, and Flair is all “This belt was bought and paid for by your family, so you work for me!” as he starts cutting a crazy Flair promo. We cut away to David Crockett, interviewing Dusty’s doctor, and he’s STILL on about the damn ice. “But do you think the ice helped the injury?” He’s like Chandler with the cranberry sauce. OK, you put ice on the damn ankle, shut up about it already. The doctor heartily endorses using ice and gives us a little speech about using ice instead of heat. Tonight’s sponsor: Ice. So back to Flair, who has zero sympathy for Dusty, because a man doesn’t cry when he’s down, and a REAL man doesn’t even fall down in the first place. And that’s why he’s got the $800 watch, jack. Tremendous stuff from Flair.
– Arn Anderson v. Mack Jeffers. Ah, the other half of the dreaded Jeffers duo. Arn stomps him down and drops a knee, and finishes with the gourdbuster at 1:29.
– Arn again reasserts his claim to the TV title (apparently, Dusty has the belt at home in the closet, along with himself. Oh, TAG) and has words for Wahoo, should he dare to return to the territory.
– Magnum TA v. Jerry Garmon. You know the drill here. Belly to belly in 0:18.
– Terry Taylor v. Paul Garner. Garner attacks to start, but Taylor snapmares him down and follows with a slam. Kneedrop and they head up, as Taylor brings him down with a superplex at 1:07.
– The Midnight Express v. Don Turner & Kent Glover. The message today is for Jimmy Valiant & Rocky King, who are barely above jobber level themselves. Bobby is all over Glover, getting the flying kneedrop before bringing Turner in for more abuse. Condrey slams Bobby onto him to finish at 1:07. This is quite the briskly paced show.
– And we finish with the Superstar, babbling as usual. I’m frankly shocked that they never had a debate between him and Dusty to see who could put more homespun wisdom into a 2 minute promo.
Well, obviously this one ruled, and we’re getting closer to the moment everyone is waiting for, so hopefully they skip a few more shows to get us there.
