In Hindsight: On The Lot – Episode 8

I don’t really have anything to say about Chris Benoit – everything else that needs to be said, the Pulse Wrestling folks have said. You’re here to read about On the Lot, so here we go.

Last week, Marty got the boot because he didn’t seem to get that they were making movies, not movie trailers. This week, someone else goes home, and if it’s not the Jessica the tree horror movie girl, I’ll be very surprised.

This week, the second round of eliminations begin, and six finalists will show their films. Adrianna “Costa” is wearing a short purple… thing. Guess she didn’t want to showcase her boobs this week?

Over the last five days, the directors have shot comedies around L.A. using a show-supplied pool of actors. But instead of making all five of last weeks’ directors shoot films, Adrianna and Gary go to the Rock StarOn the Lot mansion and give Jessica the boot.

Now here are the resident judges Carrie Fisher and Gary Marshall, and the guest judge is Mark Waters, director of Mean Girls.

OK, time for the films.

First to go is Shalini Kantayya, debuting Dr. In-Law, about an antagonistic man, his son-in-law, and a language barrier with the doctor. And it proves the adage about anal probes being funny – as long as it’s not being done to you.

Carrie – I think you did an (sic) really, really good job.
Mark – I got some really good laughs out of that. I was missing a first act.
Gary – I love relative humour. I didn’t think it was quite complete at the end.

Next up is Adam Stein, and his film is Discovering the Wheels, about cavemen finding a Mustang, and Adam is doing special effects for the first time. Why cavemen are on a perfectly manicured lawn is beyond me, but the fx are nice, and the story is easy to follow despite having no dialogue. With only two minutes of film time available, it felt rushed, but there was a beginning, middle and end, and I felt that it was well done.

Carrie – I thought it was really, really ambitious. I thought it was good.
Mark – Really good job. You didn’t really nail the tag, so work on figuring out a great ending.
Gary – I thought it was a nice film, and very ambitious. It held my attention, but so did this blonde behind me. Good job, Zach.

Third to go is Will Bigham, showing Nerve Endings, a dark comedy. Like Shalini, it’s a medical comedy. Unlike Shalini, it’s not funny. I found the film somewhat disturbing actually, someong playing with your brain. I dunno, it’s just not my kind of thing.

Carrie – Only you could make blood and an exposed brain adorable to me. I thought it was adorable and I always like your stuff.
Mark – I thought this was kind of a misfire.
Gary – This movie scared me a little bit. I thought it was funny.

Hilary Graham is next, and her movie is Under the Gun. It’s an action comedy about two women robbing a sperm bank. The writing and the pace are spot on, and I think after her last two misfires, Hilary has gotten back on track.

Carrie – You redeemed yourself!
Mark – Totally fun to watch. I was hoping a little better ending. Kudos to you.
Gary – It was very good, and Thelma and Louise rob a sperm back got you back in the competition.

Fifth this week is David May, with the romantic comedy How to Have a Girl. The premise has the guy wanting a boy, and the gal wanting a girl. And they go about doing everything they can to ensure that they get their way. The tussling around is fun, and the movie is enjoyable, but I didn’t think that it was truly funny – merely “cute”.

Carrie – It was a little confusing to me. I didn’t think it was a success.
Mark – It was delicious comic conceit and it didn’t deliver on the promise. It didn’t really work for me.
Gary – Sex is nice, and it was a better bedroom wrestling scene than in Borat.

The final competitor this week is Zach Lipovsky, and he’s showing Die Hardly Working that has no visual effects at all. It really relies on the actors to mimic props, and they do a bang-on job of it. Excellent work from them, and yet another winner from Zach.

Carrie – Your film is fantastic.
Mark – I was really impressed by this. Everything you did – really good choices.
Gary – You made fighting and killing look silly, the way it should be.

Judges’ picks:
Carrie – Zach
Mark – Zach
Gary – Hilary

Kevin’s favourite: Zach.

Eliminated: David

Sir Linksalot: On The Lot

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