The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – October 26 1985

The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – October 26 1985

– Time to get back on the horse, as they say. I got an e-mail from a concerned fan who thought that I was needing to move on past Benoit and hopefully avoid hating wrestling forever or something, but fear not, I’m fine. If Owen Hart’s death couldn’t kill my love for our so-called sport, this won’t either.

– So once again we skip ahead a few weeks, missing the October 19 show and moving on here. I like that plan — gets things moving towards the Horsemen.

– Your hosts are Tony & David.

– We start out with Arn Anderson, who decides to go with the “Possession is 9/10ths of the law” theory and presents himself as the new World TV champion, despite only stealing the belt from Dusty. We watch a clip of Arn knocking Dusty off his crutches and taking the belt, and then come back to Arn chuckling at the image, which is a nice touch.

– Magnum TA v. Tony Zane. Magnum finishes with his usual 30 second belly to belly. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him wrestle a squash that lasted more than a minute. He joins us for a promo afterwards, and he’s really quite miffed at Tully and Arn.

– Ricky and Robert join us, having lost the tag titles to those godless commies from Minnesota, the Russians. If only there was some major wrestling event upcoming where they could get a rematch!

– Jimmy Valiant and Big Mama (who weighs like 100 pounds and has jugs the size of melons) have words for Jim Cornette and the Midnight Express. I question Jimmy’s backup here.

– Superstar Billy Graham v. Joe Jobber. Teddy Long is working as a ringboy here, oddly enough. I must once again say how eerily Graham resembles the future Hollywood Hogan here, as it’s obvious that Hulk got his heel act from watching these tapes. Graham pounds the unnamed jobber down and hits the chinlock for a while, then tosses him and grabs a facelock on the way in. Graham messes up the body vice on the first try and then gets it to finish at 3:15.

– The Midnight Express v. Rocky King & Carl Stiles. We’re joined in progress here for some reason. Condrey works on the arm of Stiles and chokes him out on the ropes. Eaton dropkicks him and the Express double-teams him in the corner and they toss Stiles in and out, just to be jerks. STO from Dennis and Bobby finishes with the Rocket Launcher. They’re in a really bad mood this week and continue beating on Stiles, then kick the crap out of Rocky King as well. Jimmy Valiant tries to make the save and he gets destroyed, but a very unattractive woman hits the ring and cold-cocks Bobby with one punch. Well, that’s gotta be Ron Garvin in his cross-dressing secret identity of Miss Atlanta Lively. Was that “her” first appearance?

– DUSTY UPDATE! His doctor wants him to maintain his strength and fitness (*cough*) and we get a montage of Dusty’s exercise equipment. David Crockett, interviewing Dusty and the doctor, sadly does not jump in with ice-related questions and opinions this time around.

– Buddy Landell v. Rick Dunn. Dunn tries a wristlock but Landell scams the ref into breaking for using the hair. Dunn keeps coming with a crossbody for two, but Landell gets a cheapshot and pounds him down, then hits the chinlock. He slugs away in the corner and gets a dropkick, which sets up the corkscrew elbow and figure-four to finish at 2:22. While perusing Wikipedia as I generally do while watching these shows, I came across Ron Garvin’s entry, which claims that Buddy was booked to win the NWA World title from Flair but got busted for drugs, which resulted in Garvin’s title reign. I’ve never heard THAT version before. Who would be dumb enough to put a World title on freakin’ Buddy Landell?

– More with Dusty, as Bill Apter interviews Ric Flair and we get a video cut-in with Dusty at home to offer his point of view. He’s in video clips! He’s at the doctor! He’s at home! HE’S EVERYWHERE! He notes that he might still have a thousand great matches left in him. Yeah, and I might win the lottery tomorrow, but I wouldn’t stake my life on it. Despite this being Flair’s segment, he can barely get a word in edgewise. When he does, he declares Dusty’s career OVER, and thus out of his hair for good. Dusty calls him a hasbeen and Flair gets all worked up and yells at the blank screen.

– Paul Jones informs us that Barbarian is off winning titles in Asia or something, so there’s no Superstation challenge match tonight against Wahoo. Luckily, Arn Anderson still has some space left on his body to win more gold (not counting his SWEET pimp hat), so he’s ready.

– Southern heavyweight title: Wahoo McDaniel v. Arn Anderson. Wahoo chops Arn out of the ring to start, and then wins a test of strength and takes him down with a headlock. Arn fights up, but Wahoo takes him down again with an armbar and works on that. We take a break and return with Arn holding a chinlock, but Wahoo slugs out and chops him down for two. Another chop off a slam gets two. Wahoo works the count, but Arn recovers enough to pound him down, but Wahoo gets another chop for two before Ole runs in for the DQ at 7:20. Not much to this one. *1/2 The Andersons beat him down and Arn decides to add the Southern title to his collection, but Magnum TA has had ENOUGH and steals the belt back for Wahoo. Wahoo would lose that title a couple of weeks after this to some green rookie named Lex something or other.

– Next week’s Championship Challenge match is a special non-title Championship Challenge between Superstar Graham and Abdullah the Butcher. No, I don’t know how that’s a championship match, either.

– The Rock N Roll Express v. Randy Barber & Kent Nelson. Robert hits Barber with a kneelift as David announces that the Express gets a rematch with the Russians at Starrcade 85. Double elbow from the RNR and Nelson comes in and quickly gets taken down in a hammerlock. Man, they shouldn’t piss this guy off too much or he’ll use the power of Dr. Fate on them. Robert boots him down and Ricky drops a leg. Robert with a rollup for two and he works on the arm, as does Ricky. Double dropkick finishes at 4:49.

– First appearance of Tully this week, as apparently Magnum TA has requested an I Quit match for the US title at Starrcade. Tully denies him, because his chance has come and gone. Too bad, might have been a good match. Oh well, we’ll never know, I guess.

– Ole Anderson v. Mike Nickol. Ole wrestles Nickol down to the mat and rides him, then pounds him on the ropes. He throws knees and chokes him out, then grabs a standing armbar, turning it into a chickenwing on the mat. More choking on the ropes and Arn yells at him to finish the guy off. Good call, this is a boring squash. Ole jumps on the shoulder and then goes up and drops the knee on the stunned jobber, and finishes with the armbar at 4:37.

– Sam Houston v. The Black Cat. Houston controls with armdrags and a dropkick, but the Cat comes back with a hammerlock slam on Sam’s bad arm. Houston takes him down with another armdrag and works on the arm, but Black Cat gets his own armbar. Houston slugs out and fires away in the corner, setting up a dropkick and bulldog to finish at 4:20. Nice touch with Houston selling the previously broken arm.

– Magnum again makes his case for the I Quit match, and if Tully’s got any guts, he’ll sign. Well, we know he doesn’t, so that’s hardly the best tactic.

– Tully Blanchard v. The Italian Stallion. Stallion gets a dropkick to send Tully into the corner, as he’s very distracted by TA at ringside. Tully comes back with a kneelift and fires away in the corner, then hits the chinlock and tosses him. Back in, they slug it out while Magnum yells at Tully, and Stallion gets a small package for two. Tully slugs him down again and goes to the chinlock, but Stallion elbows out of it again. Stallion tries a headlock, but Tully suplexes out of it and elbows him down again, then drops a knee to the back of the head for two. Stallion keeps fighting, but Baby Doll trips him and the slingshot suplex finishes at 5:14. Magnum goes over to teach Baby Doll about meddling, and that triggers a crazy brawl between Tully and Magnum as the credits roll over top. Oh man, what an ending.

– Until next time…

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