In Hindsight: On The Lot – Episode 9

Adrianna “Costa” is dressed relatively conservatively this week, but what’s up with the empire waist? She’s doesn’t look pregnant, and she’s definitely not Jordin Sparks-sized.

Anyway, let’s head to the Rock StarOn the Lot mansion to see what the competitors thought of their films, and to see who gets the boot. What, we’re not even doing this live anymore? Sure enough, Adrianna and Gary show up, and leaving “The Lot” is David, who gets a standing ovation on the way out. We get Adrianna telling six directors what they already know – they’re making horror films.

Apparently, the viewers gave Will’s Nerve Endings the highest number of votes, which frankly doesn’t surprise me, seeing as Ghetta Rhoom scored highly as well. Obviously, the lesson is this: crass, one dimensional comedies sell. Ye gods.

This week, joining Carrie Fisher and the Dirty Old Man is Eli Roth, director of Hostel. Horror’s not my thing, so I’ve no idea who Roth is.

OK, time for the films.

First up is Kenny Luby, with The Malibu Myth, and he’s used to doing things himself in a gung-ho manner. He has conflicts with his DoP, and we’ll see how he does. He gives us zombies mixed with blogging and… Tatiana Ali? You know, I thought that was her in David’s short last week, and if it’s her again… well, at least she’s getting paid. Decent thriller, a little light on the gore, but I thought the payoff at the end was fun.

Carrie – That’s your most accessible film for me, unlike your ties. I thought that it was good. Compared to your other stuff this was Gone With the Wind.
Eli – I thought you did a great job. If there was one criticism I thought the buildup was better than the attack itself.
Gary – Your monsters were really good and I thought the tempo was really good. I think Adrianna should give you a hug.

Second competitor is Sam Friedlander, and his film is Anklebiters, and he’s working with animals, children and puppets – three things that are supposedly no-no’s in horror movies. The puppet looks sufficiently creepy, but when it moves, it’s a little fake. In that sense, it didn’t work for me, but then again, a lot of the film was spoiled by the intro, so blame goes more to the show producers than Sam here.

Carrie – The prologue was a whole other movie, but once it got to the horror it was good.
Eli – The attack is fantastic. The prologue gives away everything, but the tag was weak.
Gary – I love horror movies where the person’s alone. I thought really, that you scared me.

Next up is Andrew Hunt, showing Midnight Snack, and he’s trying to mix horror and comedy, but he still wants it to come off as scary. It doesn’t – it feels like a Sam Raimi “horror” more than true horror, but like Sam’s film, the intro goes a long way towards spoiling his “big moment”. Boo!

Carrie – I wasn’t horror so much as Rocky Horror. I liked it.
Eli – It’s very difficult to do comedy in a horror. It’s well shot, but it’s neither fish nor fowl.
Gary – I’m a sucker for comedy in anything. You did a good job filming it.

Next film belongs to Jason Epperson, and his movie is Eternal Waters, and he’s working with kids. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! It’s a cool visual with the kid in the water-filled casket. Jason’s film has a supernatural vibe to it, and like Andrew’s film, I wouldn’t really classify it as horror, but more like M. Night Shayalman-style crap.

Carrie – The first really scary movie so far for me. My favourite thing of yours so far.
Eli – I don’t think the kid was your problem – it’s the mother. It’s hard to take her seriously. The way you had her dressed was the problem.
Gary – Sensational. I think you’re gonna give everybody a nightmare.

Next up is Shira-Lee Shalit, with Open House. She’s calling her film a “chiller”. And it is, in a sense, but I think that the movie needed more time to really give you that spine-tingling feeling, and so I’d call it a good start in that respect.

Carrie – You got a good performance but it didn’t scare me. It’s hard to sell ghosts during the day.
Eli РI felt that you were forcing the music and that it was clich̩ ridden.
Gary – There was no conflict. I think you’re better suited to comedy, truthfully.

On the Lot gets bumped to Monday next week, as we get to watch baseball players compete in a meaningless game on Tuesday. Yay?

Wrapping up the films is Mateen Kemet, and he’s showing Profile which he calls a “new twist” on the horror genre. It’s a pretty brutal film, and yes, it’s not a traditional horror film, but honestly? It was the scariest film out of the six shown.

Carrie – I thought you got really good performances. I didn’t get what was going on. It didn’t really work for me.
Eli – I think the strength of the film is the performance of the lead actor. The problem is that you have so many shifting points of view we get disconnected and I think you could’ve done more with the subject matter.
Gary – It was more horrifying than horror. It was a very admirable and a very brave try.

Judges’ picks:
Carrie – Andrew
Eli – Kenny
Gary – Jason

Kevin’s favourite: Kenny

Eliminated: Shira-Lee

Sir Linksalot: On The Lot