The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – November 9 1985

The SmarK 24/7 Rant for World Championship Wrestling – November 9 1985

– Hosted by Tony & David.

– We start with de facto TV champion Arn Anderson, and they inform him that the belt is held up, despite him standing there holding it. Arn cries collusion and protests that possession is 9/10ths of the law. Tournament is pending.

– Manny Fernandez v. Vern Deaton. Manny dropkicks him and snapmares him into a kneedrop, and goes to work on the arm. Deaton gets all uppity, but Manny catches him with the Flying Burrito and goes up to finish with a flying knee at 2:32. Mildly notable for the refereeing debut of the one and only Teddy Long.

– Ole & Arn Anderson v. Keith Freeze & Jimmy Blackland. The Andersons quickly switch off on Blackland and Arn slams him into a kneedrop for two. He chokes Blackland out on the ropes and Ole comes in with a nasty stomp to the arm and adds his own choking. Over to Keith Freeze, who quickly gets turned into putty by Ole, and Arn adds the hammerlock slam. They mechanically destroy the arm and Arn hits him with the gourdbuster to finish at 2:53. Bit of a change from the usual armbar finish.

– Tully Blanchard, man of class, points out how low and evil Magnum TA is for treating Baby Doll like he did, and we get a replay of the clip from last week (David Crockett commenting “She likes it! She likes it!” like it was a wrestling match is particularly awesome).

– The Russians v. Jimmy Langston, Kent Glover & Larry Clark. Clark attacks Khrusher, but gets slammed for his troubles. Ivan elbows him down and Nikita adds one of his own. Clark escapes Ivan and Langston comes in, but puts his head down and gets pounded. The Russians switch off in the corner and beat the holy hell out of the poor jobber. Kent Glover comes in and throws punches at Nikita, but he just shrugs it off and swats him down, followed by the Russian Hammer from Ivan. Nikita just kills him with Sickle at 3:50 to finish. How can you not love Nikita?

– The Rock N Roll Express v. Jim & Mack Jeffers. This is a rather wrestling-heavy episode. Ricky catches Mack with an overhead armdrag off a criss-cross, and Robert gets a sunset flip for two. The RNR each grab headlocks on Mack, but he makes the ropes. Over to Ricky for a dropkick and Robert rolls him up for two, and Jim Jeffers gives it a try but immediately gets taken down by Ricky, who works on the arm. Over to Robert for a kneelift and Ricky comes off the top with a kneedrop, but Jeffers slugs away in the corner. Ricky fights back and comes off the top with another kneedrop, onto the arm this time, and Mack Jeffers comes in and eats a double elbow. Double dropkick finishes at 6:20. Rather extended squash for the RNR.

– Starrcade UPDATE! Bass v. Bart! Andersons v. Billy Jack & Wahoo for the National tag titles! The Russians v. The Rock N Roll for the World tag titles! Magnum v. Tully for the US title! Terry Taylor v. Buddy Landel for the National title! The Midnight Express v. Jimmy Valiant & Miss Atlanta Lively! Superstar Graham v. The Barbarian! And of course, Ric Flair v. Dusty Rhodes for the NWA World title!

– Billy Jack Haynes v. Thunderfoot. Haynes quickly presses Mr. Foot and sends him running out of the ring early on. Back in, Billy wins a test of strength and dropkicks him out again. Really, Thunderfoot is a one-trick pony — all he’s got is the loaded boot and it’s essentially a matter of surviving until he can kick the guy. Haynes overpowers him and takes him down with the armdrag, and he works on the arm with a hammerlock. An armbar takes forever and we take a break. Back with Haynes STILL holding that armbar. He gives Thunderfoot a clean break in the corner and pays for it with a cheapshot, and Dillon adds some choking on the apron to put Thunderfoot in control. Suplex gets two. He works on Haynes’ neck and holds him in a facelock, into a backdrop suplex for two. TF puts the head down, however, and Billy clubs him to come back, and he’s all fired up! He clotheslines him down and follows with an elbow off the second rope, but JJ distracts him to prevent the full-nelson. Thunderfoot loads up the thunder in his foot, but takes too long thanks to the distraction of Manny Fernandez, and Billy Jack rolls him up for the pin at 10:01. **3/4

– Manny offers a spot as his tag partner to Billy Jack, which is kind of a dick move when the guy is going on to the biggest show of the year to challenge for the National tag titles with a different partner.

– Next week: Ric Flair & The Andersons v. Terry Taylor, Ron Garvin & Pez Whatley.

– Dusty Rhodes is back, and he’s gonna put his specially made cowboy boot up Flair’s ass.

– Ron Garvin v. Paul Garner. Garvin grabs an armbar and slams Garner out of the corner, then switches into a surfboard. Hiptoss out of the corner and he goes to the chinlock, then takes him down with a german suplex for two. Garvin holds a wristlock, but Garner makes the ropes and slugs back, and that proves to be pretty stupid. Garvin fires back and hooks him with the abdominal stretch. He throws chops and pounds him in the corner, and back to the facelock. Garvin wrestles him to the mat with a hammerlock and drops an elbow for two, then hooks a crucifix for two. He cranks on the neck and knocks him out with the Hands of Stone to finish at 6:23. You’d think that if Garvin could win the match whenever he wanted by punching someone, he’d just do that.

– The Russians cut their usual promo about how Russia is #1 and Dusty Rhodes can suck it, beeyotch.

– Over to the syndicated show, as Jimmy Valiant and the rather grotesque Big Mama promise to strip the Midnights naked (?!). If you needed proof of the influence of drugs in wrestling, this angle was it.

– The Barbarian v. Gerald Finlay. Finlay, as usual, gets the initial advantage, but Barbarian swats him down and hits the big boot before stomping him to the apron. Another big boot and he drops the leg, but follows with headbutts instead of going for the pin. Finlay gets tossed and Barbarian brings him back in for a clothesline, into a powerslam and flying headbutt to finish at 3:51.

– The Andersons throw out a pre-emptive warning to the six-man team next week, and Ole offers a riddle: If they’d break Dusty’s leg for FREE, what are they gonna do when Flair actually pays them to protect his title at Starrcade? And so the seeds are sown.

– Tully Blanchard v. Joe Malcolm. Tully, having regained his composure after last week, takes Joe down with an armdrag and chokes him out on the ropes. A VICIOUS kneelift follows and he tosses Malcolm, then knees him on the way in. Slingshot suplex, goodbye at 1:25.

– Paul Jones rants about Superstar Graham, telling us nothing we don’t know already.

– Terry Taylor v. Amos Moses. Now THERE’S a jobber name. Taylor works the arm to start and takes him down with a wristlock, but Moses makes the ropes. He stays on the arm and gets a rollup for two, but Moses is in the ropes again. Back to the mat for more with the arm, but Taylor gets tired of this and hits him with the five-arm, setting up the superplex to finish at 3:12. Sweet fancy Moses, he’s done.

– And we wrap it up with the Rock N Roll Express. Ricky promises that they’ll walk out with the belts at Starrcade.

Kind of a dull show this week as we cruise into Starrcade and finish up all the storylines for a while.

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