08.20.07
Live from Fayetteville, NC.
We start out with Randy Orton in the ring. JR is ringside with Tazz this week, as Lawler is still recovering from last week. Orton says that tonight is the last time you’ll see him without the WWE Title. He then recaps his RKO on Cena on the chair from SNME. Orton says that he would understand if Cena doesn’t make it to SummerSlam, and rumor is that he isn’t even there tonight. Orton says that Cena should just come out and save himself the embarrassment, and forfeit the title tonight. Mr. McMahon’s music plays, and he makes his way down to the ring. McMahon announces that his child is male, and that one of the WWE Superstars is his son. He says that he hopes his son is not like Shane & Stephanie, who only care about the money. McMahon says that he hopes he son is more like Randy Orton, and not like John Cena. Just then, Cena walks into the arena, and asks a stagehand where Orton is, and is directed to the ring. Cena comes out and Orton backs down to the floor as Cena gets in the ring. Cena says that he hopes he isn’t McMahon’s son, because he would be ashamed of him. Cena then says that he will be at SummerSlam, and he will retain the WWE Title. McMahon tells him that he better show up, or else he would strip him of the WWE Title..and speaking of stripping…McMahon says that he spent a lot of time in the New England area, and may have done Cena’s stripper mom. Cena slaps the shit out of McMahon. When McMahon gets his composer back, he tells Cena that he’s up against the ‘undefeated’ Snistky.
Commercials.
William Regal comes out and announces a Tri-Branded Woman’s Battle Royal for the #1 Woman’s Title Contender.
Melina & Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James & Candice Michelle
Candice has new…awful, techno remix of her theme song, and I now hate her as much as I hate ‘Loving Life’ McCool. Heels jump faces, faces regain control, Candice with a weird folding roll up for the pin.
Winners – Candice & Mickie
After the bell, Mickie kicks Candice in the gut, and tosses Candice out of the ring. Melina & Beth then toss Mickie…they shake hands, and then Beth throws Melina over the top rope!
Commercials.
Recap of WWE Idol last week.
Santino wants William Regal to stop the Ron Simmons/Maria date from The Dating Game 2 weeks back. Regal & Santino then make fun of each other’s accents.
King Booker and Sharmell know that HHH is in the building tonight, and they invite him down to the ring tonight to witness the official crowning of the King Booker.
McMahon & Coach walking around backstage pondering who his son is. They come across Val Venis…and Coach says that a lot would be explained if that was the case. Daivari then runs in, and puts his headdress on McMahon, and hugging him. McMahon screams at him and tells him to get it off his head, complaining about his hair being messed up. Vince then says that his son would be a real competitor…just as they pass Mr. Kennedy…and they lock eyes for a few moments.
Commercials.
Shelton Benjamin (w/ Charlie Haas) vs. Cody Rhodes
Shelton dominates the beginning of the match, working on Cody’s neck. Cody fires hup, and nails a bulldog for 2. Cody off the ropes, but Shelton grabs him and drops Cody in a backbreaker. Shelton tries for a Boston Crab, but Cody twists his legs up and rolls Shelton in for a roll up victory.
Winner – Cody Rhodes
After the bell, Haas attacks Cody, and WGTT beats down Cody.
Commercials.
Recap of Shad from Cryme Tyme hitting Cade with a chair last week.
Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch vs. Paul London & Brian Kendrick
Kendrick & Cade start, and Cade tries to overpower to start, but Kendrick is way too fast. London/Kendrick toss Cade/Murdoch to the floor, and suicide dives both of them. Cryme Tyme come through the crowd and steal Murdoch’s hat. Shad on the mic, tries to get a buyer for Murdoch’s hat. In the ring, Kendrick rolls up Cade for the pin.
Winners – Kendrick/London
Cryme Tyme gets $2 for Murdoch’s hat.
Commercials.
We come back and Maria & Faarooq are on their date. Faarooq orders a bunch of stuff that rhymes with DAMN. Santino & his date, Jillian, show up. Maria invites them to sit down.
In the ring, King Booker is in the ring, and he begins to talk about his beat down of Lawler. He then welcomes out Triple H. A fake HHH comes out, and crowns Booker. He then sends ‘HHH’ off, and goes to the announce table. He calls out James Ross (asking ‘Tazzwell’ to let him past). He wants JR to kiss his ring, and all will be forgotten about what JR has said about the King the past few weeks. JR refuses, of course, but then Sharmell shoves JR’s head into Booker’s hand.
Commercials.
Back at the restaurant, Jillian is singing to a couple. Someone asks Santino for his autograph on a program, and he has a prepared speech that appears to be given to him earlier by Santino. Faarooq calls Santino a SHAM.
Carlito’s Cabana
Carlito gets right to the point, and introduces his guest, Umaga. Umaga gets in the ring, and is confused by the random fruit in the ring. Carlito then says that he wants to challenge Umaga for the IC Title at SummerSlam. This brings out Mr. Kennedy. Kennedy says that he has done something that even Umaga couldn’t do, take out Bobby Lashley. Kennedy says that the one who should face Umaga is MISTERRRRRRRRRRR KENNEDY…and on the second KENNEDY, Umaga kicks him in the mouth! Umaga flips out and tears the Cabana apart. Regal appears on the stage, and says that the only way to settle this is for Kennedy to face Carlito, with the winner to face Umaga at SummerSlam.
Commercials.
Carlito vs. Mr. Kennedy – IC Title Shot
We come back and the match as already started. This is a very quick, very even match. They fall to the outside, and Kennedy sits Carlito against the ringsteps, and then kicks his shoulder into the steps, just like he did to Lashley.
Commercials.
Kennedy is in complete control when we come back. Kennedy goes up for the Lambeau Leap on the 2nd rope, but Carlito slides off, gets back up the turnbuckle, and hits a SUPERPLEX. They wrap each other up, and we have a double pin.
No Contest.
Regal comes out and says that there will be a Triple Threat at SummerSlam. Shocking.
Commercials.
Back at the restaurant, Santino tells Faarooq that if he ever touches him like he did last week, Santino will beat him like a Christmas HAM. HAHA. Faarooq shoves the waiter into Santino, who dumped a tray of food on him.
JR & Tazz rundown the SummerSlam line-up:
Backstage, McMahon and Melina mend their fences from SNME. McMahon tells Melina where he is staying later tonight. Snitsky comes in and says that he never knew his family, but tonight, he will be McMahon’s son. He says that he will do something to Cena that fathers try to protect their sons from. Tonight, Cena’s pain will be Snitsky’s pleasure.
Commercials.
Recap of McMahon saying he could’ve done Cena’s mom.
Snitsky vs. John Cena
Snitsky with a quick big boot sends Cena into a daze. Snitsky is dominating now. Snitsky charges Cena in the corner, but gets his boot hung up in the turnbuckle, and Cena chopblocks Snitsky’s other leg. Cena goes up, and hits the top rope famasser, and then puts Snitsky up for a FU, but Orton gets in the ring, and gives Cena and RKO.
Winner via DQ – Cena
Orton gives Cena ANOTHER RKO, and then grabs Cena’s WWE Title, and stares at it.
Show Over.
~Pk
