You know the drill. Lets take a drive up in The Hills. Then, we’ll skake on over to see what’s going on in the Life of Ryan. We take a day off to relax, but then it’s off to the “Land Down Under” as The Real World in Sydney is nothing like your world. One more plane trip back to the states and back to California as we visit those crazy kids at Newport Harbor. I hear it’s prom season already. Finally, we watch a trainwreck to find out who is the next Celebrity Rap Superstar! That’s an action packed week, so join me for another wild ride on the “Mix Express” this week…
Alright, this is the “big” one. You saw the previews from the very beginning and now it’s time. Jason is back on The Hills. I will wait for you to stop jumping up and down for joy. Go ahead, I’ll wait. Okay, that should be enough time! You see, Jason is in rehab. He has been in a lot of trouble the past year. But now he is getting out and wants to “get together” to with Lauren to “catch up”.
Audrina seems to be over Justin right now, but she and Lauren have something in common. It seems that everytime they have thought they have “moved on” from the bad boys a.k.a. jerky ex-boyfriends of theirs, those guys call them or send them a text and all the old feelings come rushing back. That explains a lot right there. But if the feelings come back that quickly, then you must not really be over them. You should, but you just haven’t learned your lesson yet. Anyways Lauren and Audrina have a double date with their personal trainer and his friend. I don’t know if that is legal or not.
In other news, Heidi fights for a new job at her work. It’s a promotion and she has to catfight with some of her friends at work. That should be no problem for her. Heidi tells her boss that she wants to be considered for the job. He will think about it. And apparently he has brain damage, because Heidi got the job! WTF! She probably got it, because she is on a TV show. HA! Her friend at work can’t believe she got it over her and really can’t believe that Heidi would go after it knowing that she wanted it. Heidi really knows how to make and keep her friends, doesn’t she?
Lauren and Audrina meet up with Jarett and Derek for dinner. The best part of this date is, of course, Lauren’s facial expressions. She seems extremely bored by Derek. She tells Audrina that she wants to stab herself in the eye. The sad part is that Derek actually thinks she likes him. Way to blow it there, kid. Lauren tells Whitney about her date. She realizes that she has only been on one date with every guy she has went out with after Jason. Whitney please don’t think or even hint that Jason is Lauren’s “prince charming”. To add insult to injury, Audrina “randomly” opens up a love book that asks love questions. One question is how many times have you been swept off your feet and been completely in love, etc. Of course, Lauren says one and refers to Jason.
Time to get down to business. Lauren meets up with Jason for coffee. Audrina, of course, meets up with Justin. Silly girls. Before we get to the big dates, here is something to note. Lauren says there is no perfect man and likes imperfect guys. Imperfect doesn’t have to mean “jerk”, though. Audrina and Justin ride on his motorcycle. They are going to be “just friends” says Audrina. Jason says the breakup was hard. Lauren says that a clean break was needed. You see, you can be friends with your ex but not right away. Just so you realize that you are better off as “just friends”. We leave with Lauren saying that the breakup was hard to get over too. To be continued…
Life of Ryan
Ryan is off to Cleveland for a big competition and various other events. This includes waking up too early in the morning to fly on a plane. Then, sign a few autographs for a couple of hours before the event. Ryan thinks this is all a bad idea.
Of course, the thing that really throws him for a loop is the fact that his dad is coming to this competition. Apparently Ryan’s dad stopped coming when Ryan’s parents got divorced. Ryan is unsure of the entire thing. He is happy that his dad is going to be there, but wonders why he stopped coming in the first place.
Ryan went to talk to his dad, but his dad’s girlfriend wouldn’t leave them alone. That really upsets Ryan, especially after she weirded him out by saying that she loved him to. Ryan says that she doesn’t even know him. Ryan gets VERY emotional. He doesn’t want to talk to anyone about it really, except his brother and his friends. Ryan then attempts to “skate it off”, but he sucks at that as well and he breaks his board.
In Cleveland, Ryan has more drama with his dad before he arrives He tries not to think about while he prepares for the competition. When Ryan’s dad does actually arrive, Ryan realizes that he missed his dad being at the competitions. This makes him remember a Vince Lombardi quote that his dad told him and that motivates him to win this competition.
The Real World: Sydney
Dunbar gets pissed off and pisses everyone else home on this episode. Issac feels that Dunbar is a little sexually frustrated. Hence, why he gave him a magazine to “read”. Dunbar says that all the girls in the house say dumb things and it pisses him off. He could snap and kill someone one day. He even “jokes” with Parisa by calling her a “New York bitch”. Parisa can’t take the joke. Dunbar actually may be sad that Kelly Anne doesn’t care about him anymore. She has two other guys to worry about.
Kelly goes on a date with an Aussie guy. The funny thing about this is Cohutta’s reaction to him. He says “this guy is too cool for school” and asks “did he just come from a weddin’ or something”.
You see Cohutta is the other guy that Kelly likes at the moment. But it seems that she likes a different guy every week. So Cohutta and the Aussie guy, Carey, may just be flavors of the week. The next best line of the night comes from Issac talking to Cohutta about liking Kelly. Issac says “girls start getting crazy when you have sex with them”. HA! That’s an interesting way to look at things.
We end with more flirting between Kelly Anne and Cohutta. That’s an odd couple for sure. Issac sees Cohutta go into the same room as Kelly Anne. He warns him that a “storm is coming if you have sex with someone in this house”. It doesn’t seem that Cohutta is listening, though, as we see those two in bed together as the show ends.
Newport Beach: The Real Orange County
Apprently, there is a lot of talk of who is going to take who to the prom. It’s a jumbled up mess as usual. Lets sort it out, though. Chrissy’s best friend, Sasha, is going with Grant. Allie is going with Chase. Chrissy is going with Clay, of course. So basically that leaves Taylor out of the loop as far as the main cast of kids goes.
Clay and Grant come pick up Chrissy and Sasha. Chrissy’s dad has the “talk” with them. No shotguns needed. Just the usual “take care of my daughter” speech. Everyone is off to the prom. I do have one question, though. When did prom dresses get SO short? I don’t think that would be legal at my high school. Of course, I graduated 7 years ago so maybe that was just the “good ole days”.
After prom, it’s time to “party”. They all get into the limo and head to someone’s house for the afterparty. Are these kids actually drinking? They are drinking something in some cups, but that can’t be alcohol? Of course, they are acting a little drunkish to not be drinking alcohol. But we will just say it’s some soda pop.
Time for the drama to begin, just when I thought we were out of the woods. Taylor shows up at the afterparty. Chase is not happy. Apparently Taylor didn’t go to the prom at all. Allie’s friend, Samantha, asks Taylor if she is going out with Chase. Taylor says they are “on and off”. Eventually Chase tells his friend, Matt, to go tell Taylor to leave. He says that really Allie doesn’t want her here but Chase is the bad guy, of course. Now Allie gets pissed off that Chase may not be telling the truth about him and Taylor. She also sees Chase talking to Taylor on the phone, which causes her to leave as well. Meanwhile, Chrissy and Clay have literally been making out the entire episode! But the sex talk will have to wait for another episode.
Celebrity Rap Superstar
No really much to recap with this show. The remaining “celebrities” attempt to rap and mostly fail. Everyone laughs at him and the one that sucks the most gets voted off by the viewers. You really have to watch this trainwreck to believe it. But it is still a wreck, which means you can’t look away. So I will watch until the end. By the way, this week the celebs write their own rhymes and rap them, which can only mean very bad things. Here is a quick rundown of what happened on this episode:
– Countess Vaughn raps a song called “Break of Dawn”. Nothing really to say about this.
– Perez Hilton raps a song called “I’m the Queen”. He disses the other celebs.
– Shar Jackson raps a song called “No Time For Hatin'”. She airs out her issues.
– Jason Wahler raps a song called “Baller”. He sure dances like a white guy. He’s really not that cool at all. Too much rehab I guess.
– Kendra Wilkinson raps a song called “Hold Up, Pimps Down”. She shakes her ass the entire time and that’s all she really needs to do.
– Sebastian Bach and Efren Ramirez were in the bottom two. But who sucked the most? That would be Efren Ramirez! Later Pedro!
And that ends the 50th volume of the “MTV Mix”! If you have any questions, comments, suggestions, or feedback of any kind..send them my way!!
I’ll see you next time when we mix things up a bit!
Sir Linksalot: Reality Television
Tags: Life of Ryan, MTV, Newport Harbor, The Hills, The Real World