NEW WARRIORS 5
Writer: Kevin Grevioux
Artist: Paco Medina
Inker: Juan Vlasco
So, I’m been out of the comics world for about 10 years. Anything interesting happen to the New Warriors recently? I’m sorry, Civil what? Oh. Well, certainly somebody level-headed like Captain America could fix– hmm? He did? Oh. Oh my. Well, that’s not good.
Quick recap: the all-new Zodiac attack members and trainees of the Initiative in NYC, and kick some serious government sponsored hero butt. The New Warriors swoop in, do some beating of their own, but then find themselves in trouble. And things get really bad (like, as bad as it gets) for Tattoo, who has one of the most gruesome death scenes I’ve ever witnessed.
The waitress formerly known as Wind Dancer makes the big save (but pays pretty dearly), there’s a mysterious guy in the shadows, Tony Stark gets reamed out over the phone, there’s a scene with Storm and Black Panther being investigated, and two reporters make a bet over lunch. The phrase “all over the place” doesn’t even come close describing this book. There’s even a near-death scene, complete with actual angel wings (on a woman who is still in her waitress outfit) and an appearance from a dead Mom, which appears to be the very epitome of the phrase “unneccessary page filler”.
But, even with all of that, my biggest gripe is with the dialogue: it is one cliche after another. Seriously, if Tony Stark was a real person, could you actually imagine hearing him spout a line like “I didn’t become a billionaire industrialist by being a fool” in a non-ironic manner? Oh, and I usually let this kind of issue go with superhero comics, but seriously – some of the outfits on the females in this book were just ridiculous. Maybe the 13-year-old boys appreciate them, but they are really pushing the bounds of good taste.
The highlight comes at the very end of the issue, with a proclamation by Night Thrasher that seems, shall we say “pre-mature” in the fifth issue of a series. I’m not sure where the writer is going with the multitude of sub-plots here, and there s some promise here, but I hope there’s a bit of streamlining soon (as well as finding out what real people talk like).
Rating: 3.5 out of 10