MTV – Volume 57

Features, Shows

Well we do lose one show that we just got last week. That’s interesting, but the quality of shows is still high as that show gets replaced by another episode of a much better show. Find out which show got the ax, along with all the drama you expect from MTV and the Mix…

SHOW REVIEWS

MONDAY


The Hills

Lauren and Whitney go to New York City to the Teen Vogue headquarters there. They think they are there for the “Young Hollywood” party. But the New York editor of the magazine, Amy Astley, has other ideas. Whitney handles the meeting with the “Young Hollywood” party, while Amy sends Lauren down to the Marc Jacobs Design Studio to meet with Kate Waters. Basically she is going to be another gopher for a photo shoot there.

Lauren’s and Whitney’s experiences in New York City were somewhat similar. Meaning they didn’t go very well. Whitney has to present the location of the party to everyone and she has to deal with Amy grilling her at every turn. It doesn’t turn out that well and they don’t like her ideas so much. Lauren does get to meet Marc Jacobs, but she has to work really hard at the photo shoot. But meeting Marc was worth it apparently.

Lauren and Whitney next go to a tasting for the “Young Hollywood” party. They get to taste food for the party. Lisa Love is there and she tells Whitney that her presentation went really well according to Amy. So surprise there. Lisa says that Whitney’s dress was quite formal, but obviously she didn’t see Lauren’s dress.

In other news, Spencer deals with him having a lack of friends. First, he runs into Frankie, Brody’s manager/friend. Frankie says that him and Brody tried to reach out to him on birthday. They want to be friends with him still, but they are going to be friends with Lauren as well so he will just have to deal with it.

Brody goes over to Lauren’s house and tells her, and us, that Spencer called him and he hasn’t called him back yet. He tells her that he doesn’t think they will ever be best friends and doesn’t want to make up with him. Lauren says she doesn’t want to be responsible for breaking up a friendship. Brody swears that he doesn’t want to talk to Spencer, because he doesn’t want to talk to him. Nothing to do with Lauren. They cuddle on the couch to end this episode. Awww…


Kaya

Here is the recap for this week’s episode, which is actually two episodes in one, of MTV’s “scripted” show:

Kaya lingers at her hotel room window, taking in the sun’s rays, when the doorbell rings. It’s Kaya’s friend Natalee, who tells Kaya that bloggers and tabloids are going berserk over her onstage antics that left her band, Crossing Coldwater, high and dry in front of a live audience. The rising rock star slumps down on the couch, feeling like the whole world is out to get her.

Over at Metro Sound, the record label fat cats meet with Kaya’s father/manager, trying to concoct an excuse the media will buy about why Kaya walked off stage. Dehydration? Exhaustion? Drugs? After deciding on a game plan, they blame her father for the fiasco, chastising him for his inability to keep Kaya under his thumb.

As Natalee rushes an extremely late Kaya to the recording studio, Kaya wonders where she stands with her bandmates Gunnar, Taylor and Manny. She’s fearful that they might throw in the towel. Meanwhile, in the studio, her bandmates are discussing the exact same thing. They’re afraid she’s going to walk out on them. When Kaya arrives, the tension is thick.

Flashback to a small garage, as a fledgling band argues over whether they should name themselves Genitalia. Yup, that’s the name Crossing Coldwater originally wanted to go with. Well, at least that’s the name Gunnar, Taylor and Manny picked out. But, after realizing it didn’t really sum up their vibe — and Taylor mentioned that it takes him an hour to cross over Coldwater Canyon to get home — they decided on Crossing Coldwater.

Now, that same band sits in the studio, facing a mountain of problems. Kaya apologizes, saying she didn’t think about how her actions would affect the rest of the band. Relieved, everyone decides it’s time to start over, and they begin to record a new song, “Kiss and Make Up.”

As Kaya builds into the chorus, the door opens. In rushes Rossi, an executive from Metro Sound. He stands there staring at Kaya, then says that the label won’t spend millions of dollars so that she can walk offstage because she’s upset about her dead sister. The room falls silent. Rossi has the sound engineers kill the studio lights, the recording session is over.

Night rolls around and the band is out on the town partying it up at their favorite bar. Kaya gets a text message from her father, saying they must talk about why she stormed offstage and how to make things right. The rest of the band brushes it aside, noticing a few cute ladies trying to get past the velvet ropes to meet them. When the guys go off hoping to score with the girlies, Kaya and Natalee chill. Natalee asks Kaya why she and Gunnar are no longer an item. Kaya admits to making a bad decision one night when she hooked up with another guy. While Kaya doesn’t think Gunnar cares about her anymore, Natalee disagrees.

Kaya reminisces about the past, going back to Crossing Coldwater’s days as an unknown garage band, before she and Gunnar started dating. When Gunnar first asked her out, she couldn’t believe her luck. Now, it seems like he couldn’t care less about her.

The next day Kaya realizes she’s in desperate need of an assistant. Despite conducting a bunch of interviews, Kaya can’t find a good match. When Natalee comes in, bearing gifts and food, Kaya gets an idea. Why not hire Natalee as her assistant? She caters to Kaya anyway, so why not pay her? The choice is made, and it seems like the perfect match.

When Kaya meets up with her father, he’s writing a $90,000 check to settle her walk-off. It seems that Kaya’s money is dwindling, and until she does what the record label wants her to do, including making the rounds with apologies, she isn’t allowed back in the studio. She looks at the speech they want her recite and refuses to give in to their demands. Her father is dumbfounded. Could Kaya really give up everything she’s worked for?

Flashback to Kaya’s childhood bedroom. Harsh words are heard down the hallway. The front door slams and a car peels out of the driveway. She flies down the stairs looking for her mother but finds her father with his head in his hands. She touches his shoulder, asking, “What happened?” He slowly pulls his head up and says he’s sorry.

Now, her father asks her how many people get to live out their dreams. Kaya storms out of his office, saying her dream is to record her music, her way. She’s getting fed up with people calling her a sellout and a liar. Her father looks her dead in the eye and reminds her she’s a rock star.

After giving it some thought, Kaya publicly apologizes for her onstage antics and does all the damage control the record label expects her to do, claiming she suffered from exhaustion the night of her public meltdown. Happy with her performance, Rossi thinks she’s bigger than ever and can’t wait to get her back in the studio. But she can barely look him in the eye.

Hitting the stage for a live performance, the band begins with the same song that caused Kaya’s headline-making meltdown. Once again, Kaya stops, saying she just can’t do it and leaves the stage. Everyone is shocked. She did it again! But just as her father and Rossi are about to strangle her, she rushes back onstage and shouts, “Just kidding!”

In her dressing room after the show, the mysterious girl that’s been haunting Kaya appears, but this time Kaya knows who the girl is — it’s her dead sister, who applauds Kaya for her acting skills. She points out that by doing everything the record company wants her to do, Kaya isn’t being true to herself. Right then, Kaya decides it’s time for her to embrace being a rock star, and she walks out into a sea of paparazzi.

Natalee wakes up Kaya, rattling off a huge to-do list. Kaya finds her friend-turned-new-assistant to be quite humorous in her serious approach to planning out the day. When room service arrives, Natalee asks why there are so many carts. Apparently, Kaya couldn’t decide what she wanted for breakfast so she got one of everything.

When Natalee says they’re going to the gym, Kaya says the only thing they’ll be exercising is her credit card. After purchasing a new BMW and buying a vintage Aerosmith shirt right off some girl’s back, Kaya’s checking account is rapidly running low.

In the recording studio, producer T. Davis hands Crossing Coldwater some sheet music, saying they will learn these songs for the album. When the band realizes that the songs were written by other artists, they refuse to play them. T insists that these songs must appear on the album, but the band stands their ground.

At a bar, bandmates Kaya, Gunnar, Taylor and Manny take a couple shots, trying to forget the absurdity of their day, when in walks Kaya’s father. As the band’s manager, he demands to know how many times they’re going to try to screw up their multi-million-dollar record deal. The band wonders what side he’s on, and Gunnar, Taylor and Manny decide that they either have to get a new producer or a new manager. Kaya keeps quiet, not siding with either her band or her father.

In the studio, T blames Kaya’s dad for the fact that he has to put up with Kaya’s fresh attitude. T quits, saying that the band is preventing him from producing an award-winning album. When Kaya’s father tells the band the news, they are ecstatic and can’t believe that things are finally going their way.

To celebrate, Kaya and her bandmates party hard, and Natalee reminds Kaya of her appearance on Carson Daly’s show the next day. But Kaya just jumps on a table and dances. Natalee looks away in disapproval, as does Gunnar. Could all the money and fame be going to Kaya’s head?

Backstage at Carson Daly’s show, Kaya throws up in the bathroom. Natalee stands by, watching over her in disbelief. The tension grows as Kaya yells at her friend, saying Natalee isn’t her mother. Once Kaya cleans herself up, she steps in front of the cameras to perform. All goes well ? at first. Then, her voice begins to fail because of all the hard partying the night before. The crowd’s applause turns to boos and Kaya ends up looking like a fool.

The next day, she apologizes to Natalee and offers her a gift, a brand-new BMW! Natalee is shocked. Now, with generosity running through her veins, Kaya thinks of a great way to upstage her horrible performance on Carson Daly’s show, which is now all over the Internet. Her high school had written her a letter, asking if she could give back to the school by performing at a dance. Sounds like the perfect plan!

The band busts through the gym doors and makes their way to the stage, giving a surprise performance. After the stellar set, Kaya asks her ex, Gunnar, to hang out. Looks like they have a date.

There’s a flashback to a gig the band had played years before at some lame party. Kaya told Gunnar that she missed her prom for this monstrosity, so he turned down the lights and said it wasn’t too late for her to have the time of her life. They danced, and sparks flew. Now, Kaya sadly watches Gunnar as he drives away. When someone asks if she’s OK, she says it’s nothing that a few drinks can’t cure.

TUESDAY

A Shot of Love with Tila Tequila

Tila puts the guys and girls through another contest. Something having to do with blow-up dolls. In the end, the girls win. They meets they get to go to “heaven” with Tila, while the guys get to go to “hell” with Tila. So that means the girls get rewarded, while the guys get punished by spanking and torture.

Here are the major and random events of this week. Tila enjoys her time with all of the remaining girls, except for Brandi, who accidentally steps on a lizard and kills it while carrying Tila away. Tila gets freaked out and doesn’t spend any alone time with Brandi as a result. Ashley liked getting spanked by Tila and that just made Tila mad. Ashley then comes on a little too strong and basically tells Tila that he loves her.

The next competition is a masseuse contest. One guy and one girl, who did the best, will receive alone time with Tila. This basically turns into a big “who can grope Tila the most legally on TV” contest. Every single person is jealous of all the others when they see them rubbing on Tila. Brandi and Ryan eventually win this competition, though. Alone time for them. Tila makes out with both of them in the hot tub as expected.

But now it’s time for two more people to go home this week. The “bottom four” are Dani, Bobby, Ashley, and Sara. The ones going home, though, are Ashley and Sara! Tila just didn’t have a connection with Sara, and Ashley is just crazy! Ashley then talks trash on the remaining guys. Ashley then goes after Bobby, because he was laughing at him. They scuffle, and Ashley gets kicked off the property as he shouts “TILA!” But who didn’t see that coming? At the end, though, Bobby has to go to the hospital to get checked out. Tila really doesn’t want to see Bobby get hurt and may have feelings for him. More fights to come as this thing turns into a complete cirus sooner rather than later!

WEDNESDAY

The Real World: Sydney

The roommates get to go on a trip for their work. So it’s a combination vacation/work assignment. They are going to Cairns, Australia. It’s the northern part of Australia and the Great Barrier Reef is there. The roommates minus one (see below) have a blast snorkeling the Great Barrier Reef and bungee jumping from 160 feet up.

Shauvon still has dumb boyfriend issues. Her ex-boyfriend doesn’t want her in Australia and flips out when she tells him about the “vacation”. This is just plain dumb and annoying. Let me break it down for you. Shauvon can’t live without David, but apparently she couldn’t give up the chance to go to Australia. Now she has second thoughts and is giving in to her retarded boyfriend. After all the teasing here it is. Yes, Shauvon is leaving Australia and The Real World! I really wanted Trisha to leave, but Shauvon was getting just as annoying so time for some new blood! How much you want to bet that Shauvon is not together with David right now?

Want another example of just a young girl who has no clue? Enter Kelly Anne, who is still talking to her ex-boyfriend. How many times do these girls have to get burned before they learn? The over/under is set at 3 from what I have seen. Cohutta says that until Kelly Anne can separate herself from her ex, there will be nothing between them.

Now it’s time for jealousy. Cohutta invites some other random girl to hang out with the guys. He does this in front of Kelly Anne. Kelly Anne proves her age once more by getting all dressed up and then flirts and dances with some random Aussie guy. Then Parisa comes in and steals Kelly Anne’s guy away from her. Good lord, that’s nothing to fight over, but they will probably.

Time for drunken confrontation argument time! Parisa flirts heavily and Kelly Anne calls her a slut. They argue, yada, yada. Cohutta has it right when he says that Kelly Anne is acting like a 12-year-old girl. Cohutta tries to put some sense into Kelly Anne and it seems to work. Kelly Anne decides to give Cohutta a chance. Love may be in the air. But next week we meet the new roommate. Her name is Ashli and she’s a young one. Great!

Pageant Place

Girls love to pretend that everything is good and smile in each other’s faces, when they really hate each other and hold grudges FOREVER! Rachel and Tara don’t like each other, neither does Rachel and Katie. Oh wait, neither does Katie and Tara. Seems like the only person who everyone gets along with is Riyo.

Rachel and Katie go work at the “Gay Men’s Health Crisis” kitchen. Rachel called Katie a “teeny bopper” last week, because Katie has never worked hard in her laugh. Rachel has actually worked and she continues to throw that in Katie’s face this episode. Katie just makes a fool out of herself. She tries to pretend that she has a clue about what she wants to do with her life, you know, after this Miss Teen USA thing. Acting and singing maybe, but she can’t sing or can she? I don’t think she even knows. Katie is 19, but why does it look like she is drinking wine? Oh, it’s a MTV show!

Katie and her boyfriend, Josh, only see each other every two weeks. So apparently that means they taped this show every two weeks, because he seems to be in every freakin’ episode. Maybe he’s just trying to get attention like Spencer from The Hills. Tara and Rachel work things out and talk about Katie.

Tara and Katie finally talk, which means lots of crying is involved. Basically it comes down to this. They want to be friends again and perhaps they have buried the hatchet. They are young girls, so more than likely that’s true. Katie then goes on some dresses and burps out loud. She gets yelled at by the pageant contest people. That’s not a lady-like thing to do.

Meanwhile, Riyo tries to learn ridiculous American phrases that make no sense but that we say every day. Riyo tells Katie to figure herself out before she does something she doesn’t want to do. Tara and Katie then go to lunch make fun of people and smile at the paparazzi.

Okay, I can’t do it anymore. This show is so mind-numbingly bad. This is the reason why I don’t review any of the other “pageant-related” shows. Basically, this show is just trying to create drama for the sake of drama. The girls are so immature, it’s just stupid. Kinda like The Real World, but there are no males on this show which makes it hard to stomach. I will stick with it until the end, though. I just won’t like it.

THURSDAY

Run’s House

Two main issues this week. Both having to do with younger and older siblings. Diggy is getting into girls and that leaves Russy out in the cold. Meanwhile, Vanessa is busy with her new job on the Guiding Light and Angela is stuck with nothing to do.

Diggy and Russy play video games, but every 5 seconds some girl is texting and calling Diggy. Diggy sets up some dates, while he kicks Russy out of his room. Russy reacts by wearing Diggy’s clothes. He just wants to be older. Run thinks that Russy wants to be into girls like Diggy.

Angela is sad that she has nothing to do, while Vanessa has this great job. Angela really wants to be in Los Angeles. Angela decides to run an idea past Rasheed Young, President of Run Athletics. That leads to her proposing a clothing line from her and Vanessa to Solomon Dabah, President of Vida Shoes International. Vanessa is a little mad that Angela did all of that without her, but she gets over it quickly.

Run takes Diggy out and gears him up to get the girls. Diggy and JoJo takes Russy to Ben & Jerry’s to get some ice cream and pick up some chicks. Russy won’t talk any of the girls, though. Russy just wants to have cool clothes. He wants nothing to do with girls. Diggy and Justine finally tell Russy to just be himself and have his own style. Run tries to bring up the girl subject to him, but he doesn’t want to talk about it at all.

Rev Run sits in his tub and writes. Good morning. How do you make a partnership work? Communication is the key that will open the door to success. Work with one another not against. Only then will a partnership reach its full potential. Remember to get to your dreams, you have to work as a team. God is love, Rev Run.

But we are not done. MTV decided to run another episode of Run’s House in place of Making Menudo that just made its debut last week. Apparently Making Menudo got moved to Sunday morning at 9:30 a.m. ET/PT. Okay, that timeslot is odd in some many ways. That show must be dead! Good luck finding that. Although, it might be back to this spot next week but consider it pretty much dead and buried. No way I’m covering the show on Sunday morning. Now on to the second episode of Run’s House this week.

This episode has two more issues. Angela thinks she will have a star on the “Hollywood Walk of Fame”. She wants to get a tattoo to represent her future star. The boys have no manners. Justine wants to teach them some manners and asks some help from a professional.

Diggy and Russy rat out Angela and her tattoo. Speaking of which, Run’s brother, Russell Simmons, comes over with his new girlfriend. Her name is Porschila and she has a tattoo of some cherries on her ass. Angela and Vanessa go to a tattoo shop and Angela decides to get a temporary tattoo that is airbrushed on. It lasts one week. It says “Pastry”, which is the name of the shoe line she is involved with.

Angela finally sucks it up and talks to her dad about the tattoo. Actually everyone else tells Run about the tattoo and he goes and talks to her. He finally agrees it seems and they head to the tattoo parlor again to get the real thing. Run plays deal maker. Angela agrees to get a small star on her foot instead of the word “pastry” on her wrist.

Justine hires Nancy a.k.a. “Miss Manners” to come to the house and teach the entire family some etiquette. She goes through greetings, napkin positioning, and even Hooters etiquette. Run and Angela finally arrive to etiquette class. Run is surprised to see some of the things she is teaching his family. But it all ends well.

Rev Run sits in his tub and writes. Good morning. Do you mind your P’s and Q’s? Sometimes we all need a refresher course in proper etiquette. If please and thank you are the magic words then cast your spell and let them be heard. Remember conduct yourself like an orchestra and keep your behavior in tune. God is love, Rev Run.

And that ends the 57th volume of the “MTV Mix”! If you have any questions, comments, suggestions, or feedback of any kind..send them my way!!

I’ll see you next time when we mix things up a bit!

Sir Linksalot: Reality Television

I'm not embarrassed to say that my favorite television show of all-time is The O.C. I live by the motto "you can't fight fate!" More importantly, I watch WAY too much television, but I do so for the benefit of everyone reading this now. So to my mom and my wife, I say thanks for reading! To everyone else that might stumble across this, remember TiVo should be your best friend!