Last night, we had a Pay-Per-View. It was a great show too. We have my live coverage, Scott Keithâ€™s Rumble Rant, and Brad Curranâ€™s view from the bar…all for your reading pleasure. By the way, John Cena is back and he won the Royal Rumble last night!
No video, instead we get the one and only John Cena kicking off the show as promised tonight! Those arenâ€™t boos as we are live from the city of Brotherly Love, Philiadelphia. He has the mic and now we get some boos mixed in with the cheers. He goes monotone as he is here to answer the question that is on everyoneâ€™s mind. How is this possible? He reminds us that the doctor said he was going to be out for an entire year. He says that he has risked his career and his health for a chance at main event Wrestlemania. He says that he is back and he is going to Wrestlemania! He then says that maybe Wrestlemania should come tonight. He calls out Randy Orton for the WWE Championship TONIGHT!
And out comes Randy Orton! Itâ€™s noticed that we are having some issues with the audio tonight, but we will wing it anyways. Randy Orton has an answer, but not one that Cena wants to hear. He runs down his prior challengers during Cenaâ€™s absence. Cena agrees with Randy that he beat them all. He calls Randy a smart champion and he will take the match tonight. Cena shows off his scar and he says that Orton has never beaten Cena and he needs any advantage he can get. Orton responds that he has become a very big deal since Cena was out. He wonâ€™t defend the championship until the people open their wallets and pay to see it. He will however defend the championship at No Way Out unless Cena wants to wait until Wrestlemania. Cena is okay with waiting until No Way Out, but that still leaves tonight. As for tonight, Cena wants to get some action. He will get him some tonight!
We are back and Ashley makes her way to the ring for a divas tag team match! Her partner should be in Playboy as well, Mickie James! Last week, Mickie lost in her hometown. Their opponents, the loudmouth Jillian Hall and the powerhouse Beth Phoenix. Lillian Garcia is INTIMIDATED at the presence of the Glamazon, messing her introduction up.
Mickie James & Ashley v. Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall
Divas Tag Team Match
Mickie and Jillian lock up and they do some nice acrobatic moves, but Mickie gets a near fall. In comes Beth Phoenix and Mickie goes to town on Beth after she mocks her! Mickie connects with the ring post and Beth takes control, with a slight assistance from Jillian. Spinning side slam connects and Jillian comes in and drops the elbow for two! Mickie nails the Mickie-curana from the corner and Jillian tags in Beth. Mickie gets a backslide for one. Wraparound neckbreaker connects for two! The Screaming DDT is blocked as Jillian stops that. Beth nails the Fishermanâ€™s Suplex for the three. Jillian prevents Ashley from breaking up the fall.
Winners: Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall
Backstage, Vince McMahon makes Cena/Orton official for No Way Out. He asks who would face the champion at Wrestlemania. Regal references the barbaric match he mentioned earlier and Vince thinks it is a great idea. He allows Regal to make the announcement.
William Regal makes his entrance. He announces that the winner of the Orton/Cena will face the winner of the Elimination Chamber, also to take place at No Way Out. We get the super-cool video highlighting the barbaric match. He explains the rules to those that have no idea. The participants include Umaga, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jeff Hardy, & Triple H. He leaves.
Mike Adamle is live from ringside and he pimps our two main events. First, Umaga & Snitsky takes on Triple H and a partner of his choosing and Chris Jericho & Jeff Hardy takes on Randy Orton and John Bradshaw Layfield. Boy, Mike Adamle is surely excited that he canâ€™t express it well enough!
Last night, Santino graces us with Big Dick Johnson.
Carlito makes his way to the ring, followed by Santino Marella and Maria. King gets horny at the site of seeing Maria naked. Cody Rhodes comes out with Hardcore Holly and this match should be interesting.
Cody Rhodes v. Carlito
They circle the ring and Carlito takes the early control. Carlito misses a charge and Rhodes arm drags him and applies a wrist lock. Carlito gets back up and he corners Rhodes. He nails some chops and Rhodes counters. Carlito eats post and nearly gets pinned. Rhodes goes back to the wrist, but is forced to let go. Rhodes is on the advantage, focusing on Carlitoâ€™s wrist. Carlito nearly sleeps too long, and he gets out of it. Carlito beats some sense in Rhodes, but Rhodes fights back. Turnbuckle clothesline sends Carlito out of the ring. Rhodes exits the ring and he tosses Carlito back inside. Marella distracts Rhodes for one second and Rhodes eats a Backcracker for three!
Backstage, Triple H talks to Shawn Michaels about No Way Out. Itâ€™s three weeks away and tonight is the return of DX once again. That match is next apparently.
Candice Michelle is on the set for this yearâ€™s GoDaddy.com Super Bowl shoot. However, this one isnâ€™t a shootâ€¦Are you ready? DX in HD! Triple H has the microphone and he says that they were banned, but as it happensâ€¦Anytime, Any place, Anywhere. He calls out Michael Buffer for gimmick infringement! HAHA!
DX v. Snitsky & Umaga
Tag Team Match
Nice to see DX being handed some fresh competition tonight. We enter the RAW Zone â€¦time to put the kiddies to bed. This will be ugly.
The bell rings and Triple H locks up with Snitsky. He backs away and Triple H asks for some Tic-Tacs to counter Snitskyâ€™s bad breath. â€œBrush Your Teethâ€ chants as Snitsky starts off strong, but Triple H wonâ€™t be denied. Michaels is tagged in and he works on Snitskyâ€™s arm, then tags back out. Triple H is the aggressor, bur Snitsky gets a scoop slam. Michaels is in and he nails the stinging chops. Flying forearm connects and Umaga gets a punch. Michaels goes up top and Umaga superkicks him out to the floor. Snitsky goes outside and he tosses Michaels back in. Snitsky gets a bearhug applied and Michaels punches his way out of it. Bearhug try again and Shawn looks up to the heavens. He beats his way out again, but eats a clothesline! To the heel corner Michaels goes and Umaga gets an illegal double team. Snitsky gets the stinky boot to Michaelâ€™s throat before tagging in Umaga. Umaga gets a modified bearhug on Michaels as we go to break.
We are back and Shawn Michaels is stuck in a Tree of Woe. Diving Headbutt connects as the referee frees Michaels. Cover gets two for Umaga as he nails a vicious headbutt. Snitsky is back in and he applies the borehug, I meanâ€¦bearhug. Michaels gets out of it and nearly tags in Triple H, but doesnâ€™t get it. Michaels is laid out in the corner and Umaga MISSES the Rear End Collision. Michaels fights for a tag, but opts for a tornado DDT instead and both men are down! Snitsky is in, Triple H is in! Triple H hits the high knee and he has a helping of Umaga. Umaga misses the charge and Triple H levels Umaga with a clothesline! Knee Smash connects, but Umaga nails a Samoan Drop! Michaels in with SWEET CHIN MUSIC and a PLANCHA! Snitsky misses the big boot, but Triple H hits the Spinebuster. PEDIGREE CONNECTS! Game, set, match.
Backstage, JBL and Randy Orton have a heart to heart, so to speak. They want to face each other at Wrestlemania, but tonight they have to get along. If Cena shows up, both of them will take care of him.
Todd Grishman is with Jeff Hardy. He was too close in becoming the WWE Champion. He says that he will go to Wrestlemania after he wins at No Way Out. Nice quick interview.
Back to Vince McMahon who is pissed off at Hornswoggle for letting him down. He calls him a loser and he is ashamed of him. He kicks him out and we take a break.
WWE Rewind: Ric Flair beats MVP and his career still rides on!
Coming to the ring, from Green Bay, Wisconsin, Mr. Kennedyâ€¦Kennedy! His opponent, somebody who is just around because his tag team partner is injured.
Mr. Kennedy v. Brian Kendrick
Kennedy attacks Kendrick from the get go and he doesnâ€™t let up. Kendrick avoids the kick from Kennedy, and Kendrick scores some offense of his own for a moment. Kennedy tosses Kendrick back in the ring after destroying the arm and he continues the torture. Kendrick fights back, nailing the dropkick! He goes up top and he crashes and burns. Mic Check! One! Two! Three!
Winner: Mr. Kennedy
Kennedy calls for his microphone and he says that he went to William Regal. He asked to not be included in the Elimination Chamber because there is someone more important â€“ Ric Flair. He says that he is going to waste him.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Here he is! Ric Flair is smiling wide tonight. He has two things to say to Mr. Kennedy: Good luck and WOOOOOOOOOO!
WOOOOOOO! Sorry, couldnâ€™t help myself. Melina makes her way to the ring for a singles match against Maria! Santino makes certain to be with Maria, however.
Maria v. Melina
They lock up and Melina takes Maria down and locks up her leg. Maria fights back, sending Melina to the corner. BRONCO BUSTER connects on Melina, but Maria posts Maria. She clubs the middle of her back and Melina is in control. Melina has a headlock hooked on, but Melina nails the neckbreaker! Maria fights back, but Melina sends her to the ropesâ€¦HEADSCISSORS by Maria! Maria nails a belly buster (as called by J.R.) for two ! Maria misses a splash in the corner. Melina looks for a sunset flip, but she pulls off Mariaâ€™s pants! WOOOOOOOO! Maria gets the three count! \
Santino bitches afterwards about Mariaâ€™s underwear. He says that even J.R. has a boner! He vows that no one will neverâ€¦EVER see his Maria in Playboy.
Todd Grisham is with Chris Jericho, who is sporting a bandage on his forehead. A new side of Chris Jericho, who would had thought of it? We have the happy-go-lucky Jericho and the sadistic Jericho. He vows to make JBLâ€™s life a living hell from now until Orlando!
Mike Adamle recaps us of what will be happening at No Way Out in three weeks from tonight.
WWE Championship: John Cena v. Randy Orton
#1 Contenderâ€™s Match â€“ Shawn Michaels v. Triple H v. Umaga v. JBL v. Chris Jericho v. Jeff Hardy
Not Announced, but seemingly will be: Mr. Kennedy v. Ric Flair
Jeff Hardy makes his way to the ring as we are ready for our main event! Heâ€™s followed by Chris Jericho as J.R. is liking this. All we need in all this is more cowbell.
Chris Jericho & Jeff Hardy v. John Bradshaw Layfield & Randy Orton
The bell rings and Orton starts off with Jericho. They circle the ring and they lock up. No dice. Another lock up and Jericho has the side headlock. Jericho gets the chops, followed by a clothesline. Vertical Suplex hits and Jericho stares at JBL. Stiff kicks by Jericho and he catches Orton in the corner. Orton gains an opening, but Jericho nails the Codebreaker and J.R. forgets the move! Hardy is in and he nails the Swanton Bomb for a close two as JBL pulls Orton out of the ring!
We are back as Randy Orton picks his stomp spots on Hardy. Hardy gets a forearm for a near fall. Orton is back on the offense and he tags in JBL. JBL works over Hardy and he sends him to the ropes. He misses the elbow, but Hardy connects with the kick! Double legdrop connects and JBL sends him to the ropes. Big Boot connects for two! Orton is back in and he covers Hardy for two! He has on a shoulder lock, but hardy is close to Jericho. Both men are back up and Hardy tries to fight out, but Orton uses the hair! JBL tags back in and he nails some punches! Orton is back in and Hardy is in trouble. Hardy is sent to the ropes, but Hardy gets the wraparound clothesline! JBL gets tagged in, Hardy does as well! Jericho opens up a can on JBL! Liontamer try and Orton trys to interfere! Springboard dropkick connects as Orton is now a non-factor! Lionsault connects on JBL for TWO! Chaos ensues as Hardy tries to hit the Whisper in the Wind, but he crashes into a security guard! Jericho has the Liontamer on JBL, but Orton nails the RKO! JBL covers and this one is over!
Winners: JBL & Randy Orton
John Cena is out and both Orton and JBL are ready for him! JBL wishes Orton luck and he backs off! Cena nails the FU on Orton! Cena stands tall!
We see a replay of the events and I have one wordâ€¦HA! Cena is at the top of the key as this show is over!
See you sooner than you all think!
The Inside Pulse
The RAW Report Card
Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall d. Mickie James & Ashley – D+
Carlito d. Cody Rhodes – C+
DX d. Snitsky & Umaga – B
Mr. Kennedy d. Brian Kendrick – D-
Maria d. Melina – C+
JBL & Randy Orton d. Chris Jericho & Jeff Hardy – B+
The Final Grade for RAW 1/28/2008: C