10 Thoughts On Raw – 02.18.2008

WrestleMania 24 - Orton vs. Cena vs. HHH
1) While the opening interview doesn’t bother me, I’m going to take my first moments back to complain about the ongoing need to have Triple Threat matches for the world titles. I’ve never been a fan. The ONLY time I like them is when they’re the ECW-elimination style. The pacing of the matches is never good. It’s always one guy off in the corner while two other guys duke it out. It’s a silly format. It stinks and I don’t like it.

2) The saga of the individual Hardy Boys remains inexplicable to this day. Matt Hardy had a marketable gimmick, a huge push, stayed clean, and got fired because he had a problem with a d-bag stealing his girlfriend. He came back with a huge money feud on the table and proceeded to get buried. Jeff Hardy got fired for being a flake, went to the competition, came back, got no punishment at all, and is now a legit contender for the world title and the early favorite to win Money in the Bank. The lesson, as always, have no public opinion.

3) Line of the Night. Jerry Lawler: “Jeff Hardy just refused to lose last night.” He lost last night.

4) Normally, I’m not a fan of celebrity wrestling angles. They never work out and invariably make the wrestler look bad. That said, I’m fine with the Mayweather angle. It was well done last night even though Mayweather screwed up and broke Big Show’s nose. The nose break actually makes the angle look more legit. The difference between Mayweather and most other celebrity wrestling is as follows: 1) Mayweather is actually still relevant. It’s not taking Tyson three years past his relevance and presuming he’s going to sell tickets. 2) Mayweather is a legitimate fighting athlete. If Mayweather gets in a ring, it’s not as ridiculous as David Arquette or Lawrence Taylor. Mayweather’s job is knocking other human beings unconscious. 3) He punched the Big Show four times in one second, connecting with his nose hard enough to break it. We got a visual of bloody-toothed Big Show that goes in the annals of “awesome things that look way more awesome in HD. The Big Show flinching back from Mayweather’s punch tonight was not ridiculous because of the nose break. So far it’s being well done.

5) I’m glad to see that we’re now going on 10 years of Truth commercials and they’ve managed to do absolutely nothing but get more annoying. The most amusing part of this ad is the fact it’s taped in NYC’s Washington Square Park. As they were taping it, reminding how awful smoking is for everyone, they were likely within 500 feet of about 50 NYU bars, 350 joints/bowls/bongs, and no less than 24 drug deals. Never mind that, though… there’s SMOKING TO STOP.

6) For the record, the “who’s Mr. McMahon’s son” thing got me back watching for a while. Then the payoff was Hornswaggle and I didn’t watch another second of wrestling until the Royal Rumble. It took them delivering two top-to-bottom-solid PPVs to hook me back in. I mention this because I’m being treated to a 90-year-old vs. a midget in a steel cage… which turned into a creepy midget/BDSM/LGBT porn. Insert man-boobs reference.

7) JR drops into his serious voice to tell me that’s one of the most disturbing things he’s ever seen on RAW. I would have thought Vince McMahon’s ass was the most disturbing thing ever seen on RAW. I open up the comments for this. What’s the most disturbing thing you’ve ever seen on Raw?

8) And we go from the seriousness of midget abuse to “will Maria pose for Playboy.” No one segues like the WWE.

9) Maria’s Playboy contract stipulates that she can only pose for the magazine if she beats Beth Phoenix here tonight. I find it odd that Playboy would build a “you must beat Beth Phoenix” stipulation into their contract. That crazy Heff. The finish to this match was foolish. I know that WWE Women’s Championship doesn’t have the most storied and respected lineage but what would have been the problem with Candace or Ashley coming out and getting Beth Phoenix disqualified? That way, their World Champion doesn’t have to take a worthless pin.

10) The “Orton has never really beat Cena” angle that they brought up during the match is a good one. King mentioned it in passing, but it would actually be a good psychological angle to work into a future feud. I have no idea if it’s true or not, but it’s a good gimmick.

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