The SmarK DVD Rant for the Best of RAW Volumes 1 & 2 (Part Two)

Reviews, Wrestling DVDs

The SmarK DVD Rant for the Best of RAW Volumes 1 & 2

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Volume Two / Disc Two

– Hosted by The Coach, early in 2000.

– So we start in November 1998, as the Rock is now WWF champion for the first time, and Steve Austin gets his “last shot ever” at the title the next night. Sadly, Undertaker screws him over by hitting him with a shovel, and then tries to have him embalmed while still alive. And crucifies him. Yeah, it’s a tale as old as time. This bit is basically the promo video for IYH: Rock Bottom to build up the god-awful Buried Alive match between Austin and Undertaker.

– From December of 1998: Mankind beats the Rock to win the World title. We’ve discussed this one to death lately.

– From January 11 1999: Vince organizes the Corporate Rumble to determine who gets #30 in the real match. We start with Shamrock and Billy Gunn, as they immediately brawl on the floor after Shamrock eliminates himself by leaping over the top rope, and Ken beats on him until Big Bossman comes in at #3. Bossman picks up where Shamrock left off, hammering Gunn down, but walking into a flying forearm. He comes back and chokes Gunn out on the ropes, until Test is in at #4 despite Road Dogg’s music playing. So they double-team Billy and Test gets the big boot, but they can’t power him out of the ring. X-Pac is in at #5 to save, but quickly gets stomped down again. Test hiptosses Billy out after a series of reversals and then hits X-Pac with a powerbomb, and now Road Dogg is in at #6. He’s all red, which I guess is from a bloodbath and not, say, a suicide attempt. Everyone slugs it out, and Kane is #7. He immediately kicks Dogg’s ass and clotheslines him out with ease, leaving X-Pac to represent D-X alone again. The Corporation tees off on him, but HHH is #8 and he’s pretty fired up. He pounds on Test and tricks Test into accidentally clotheslining Kane, who gets pissed and dumps Test as a result. Then D-X teams up and gets rid of Kane, who takes out X-Pac on his way down, leaving us with HHH v. Bossman. We’ve seemingly run out of Corporation members, but Vince McMahon himself is #9, all greased up and ready to go. HHH gets distracted and Bossman starts to put him out, but Vince puts both of them out to win the match. But wait! There’s one more member of D-X left…Chyna at #10. The pop for that is UNHOLY. The Stooges don’t want her in the match, so she beats them up and Steve Austin joins the fun as well, leaving Chyna to oss Vince for the win and #30 spot at 10:45. That was actually a really good segment that, I daresay, was better than the real Rumble match ended up being. ***

– More classic stuff, as Shane-O-Mac and his pops train for the Rumble. Vince doing situps with a barbell weight while screaming “I HATE AUSTIN!” is great stuff.

– And indeed, Vince wins the Royal Rumble in one of those moments you’d like to forget. So let’s do just that.

– Speaking of stuff you want to forget, we move onto the Mark Henry-Chyna romance. This was actually pretty charming to start, but once it got to the transvestite involvement…look out below.

– Sadly, we skip over the pretty good ladder match that saw Rock regaining the World title, cut down to video package form instead.

– And now, time to leave your logic at the door, because it’s the Corporation v. Ministry feud. Undertaker burns a teddy bear! Stephanie McMahon debuts on camera! Burning crosses! WHERE TO, STEPHANIE~! The unholy wedding! The Corporate Ministry! It’s just in video package form, which is surprising because I didn’t think you could cram 3500 pounds of bullshit into 5 minutes like that. This was nearing the low point for the burned out Vince Russo, and it showed.

– From May 3 1999: Vince, beaten up by the Corporate Ministry, nonetheless soldiers on for a match against Shane. What a hero. Shane immediately beats him down in the corner and follows with a broncobuster, but Vince clotheslines him and finishes with McStunner at 1:45.

– And then another video package documents The Greater/Higher Power bullshit, which then led to the Magic Briefcase nonsense as Russo’s writing spiralled downwards faster and faster.

– And now it’s back to March 22 for an actual highlight, the Beer Bath segment.

– I suspect that they lifted some of this directly from this DVD for the new one, because we get the video package building up Rock v. Austin for the Smoking Skull belt, followed by Rock’s “funeral” for Austin and the monster truck invasion by Austin to make his return.

– From July 26 1999: HHH gives the interview that would, surprisingly enough, change the business forever, declaring that it was “his time” and that he was “The Game”, which launched him into the main event and put him there until this very day. He also debuted the short tights that redefined his look and gave him the look of a main event guy.

– From August 1999: HHH challenges Mankind for the WWF title the night after Summerslam. Rock is hilarious on commentary (“You spilled soda on the Rock’s shoes? These are $600!” and his protests that HHH whines so much that he should be challenging for the Women’s title). We’re joined in progress with HHH beating on Mankind outside the ring and getting a rollup for two in the ring, then hitting the high knee to cut off a comeback. Kneedrop gets two. He slugs away in the corner, but Mankind fights back and blocks a blind charge with a boot out of the corner. He follows with a clothesline for two. They brawl out after a Cactus clothesline and second ref Shane McMahon puts Mankind out with a chair, and HHH shuts up the Rock with a chair as well. They toss the first ref, and KICK WHAM PEDIGREE gives HHH the World title to begin the reign of terror. It wasn’t until his second title reign that he launched into the stratosphere and “carried the ball” so to speak.

– From August 1999 as well, yet another historic moment, as the Millennium Countdown brings us into the Chris Jericho era. This is one that I can watch a million times and not get sick of seeing, especially since this version has no blurring or funky editing and crowd shots when people say “World Wrestling Federation”.

– Showing that we’re running low on material, we move onto Chyna v. Chris Jericho in a feud that very nearly killed Jericho right out of the gates.

– On my 24th birthday, Rock and Mankind team up for the first time as The Rock N Sock Connection and win the tag titles from Big Show and Undertaker. This of course leads into This Is Your Life, Rock. Thankfully clipped down to 5 minutes here.

– October 1999: D-X reunites, albeit this time as more of a Four Horsemen-like backup of cronies for HHH rather than the fun-loving crew they started as.

– And we wrap up with Austin’s vehicular manslaughter hijinx and leave off with the beginning of the McMahon-Helmsley Era, when things FINALLY got good again.

Extras

– From January 11 1999: X-Pac & HHH v. Kane & Shane McMahon. Winner of the fall gets the European title. HHH attacks Kane to start and slugs away in the corner, but gets clotheslined from behind. Shane comes in and immediately runs away and tags Kane back in again. D-X double-teams him with Total Elimination and X-Pac gets two off that, but Kane sends him to the floor on the kick out. X-Pac runs after Shane, but gets caught by Chyna, and Kane presses him back into the ring. Shane comes in legally and pounds on X-Pac for two. Over to Kane, but HHH comes in with a high knee and chops his crotch. Kane uses that time to go up and get the flying clothesline, and it’s over to Shane, which gives D-X the chance to take over. X-Pac gets rid of Chyna and goes for the broncobuster, but Kane catches him with a chokeslam in a slick spot. This triggers a brawl and HHH fights with Kane back to the dressing room, leaving Shane to knock X-Pac out with the belt and pin him to win it at 4:20. There was so much wrong with this result and the “payoff” at Wrestlemania that I don’t even know where to start with it, but that’s Russo for you. Couple of decent spots, but it was hardly even a match. *1/4

– From January 18 1999: Chyna v. Patterson & Brisco. Brisco takes her down with a waistlock to start, but Chyna reverses and Brisco has to make the ropes. Patterson laughs at his partner and comes in with a finger in Chyna’s face, so she tries to break it off. He picks her up with an airplane spin, but gets too dizzy and drops her, so Brisco comes in to try again. Chyna gives him an atomic drop and runs his nuts into Brisco’s head, but Patterson tries to go low on her. That does nothing, and Chyna responds with the testicular claw and steps aside to let them settle it amongst themselves. Patterson dumps her and tosses her back in, and Brisco adds a Stooge’s Elbow for two, but they fight over the pin and it turns into an ugly brawl. Stress on ugly. Chyna recovers, but Brisco throws powder in her face and they play with her boobs in a spot you don’t see often, but she’s had enough and kicks their asses before DDTing them and pinning both at 6:00. This was really interesting, actually, as Chyna had HUGE appeal to the female segment of the audience with this kind of empowerment comedy stuff, before they started shoving her down our throats as a legitimate threat. As comedy matches go, I’ve seen worse. Many involving Patterson and Brisco, in fact. *1/2

– From January 25 1999: WWF champion The Rock v. HHH in an I Quit match. They slug it out and HHH wins that battle, hammering Rock in the corner and tossing him. They fight up the ramp and HHH clotheslines him by the entrance and asks for the submission, but no go. Back to ringside, as Rock comes back and sends HHH into the ringbell, but no quitting yet. HHH sends Rock into the crowd and they brawl out there, as HHH chokes him out with a TV cable, then back to ringside as Rock gets to meet the stairs. Back into the ring, HHH brings the bell in, but gets DDTd and Rock almost gets the spot of the century by putting the bell on his face and hitting a People’s Elbow with the hammer. However, since the bell didn’t go “ding!”, it’s disqualified from the race. HHH still won’t quit, and in fact comes back with the Pedigree, but he’s not done. He tosses Rock and adds another one on the floor…but he’s still not done. So it’s up to the table to finish, but now the Corporation comes out and holds Chyna hostage until HHH says “I Quit” at 9:09 to allow Rock to retain. And then his night gets worse as Chyna turns on him to reveal that she was with the Corporation all along. You know it’s Vince Russo because someone was always with someone else all along. And that pretty much killed the cool vibe they had going with Chyna, turning her from cult hero to young girls into just another femme fatale. And then she went crazy, but that’s another story. **1/2

– From February 22 1999: Hardcore champion Bob Holly v. Bart Gunn. Holly smashes a pitcher of water on Bart’s head to really set the tone, then follows with a sick chairshot on the floor. They slug it out and Bart get his own cool, refreshing drink to use as a weapon, followed by the old fashioned ringbell. They head into the crowd and Bart drops him on the railing, but Holly sprays him with the fire extinguisher and hits him with a tray of ice. Wouldn’t it do more damage to just hit the guy with the fire extinguisher? But I guess that’s the least of the logic leaps here. They fight for a suplex on the ramp and Bart gets it for two, then adds a DDT and whips him into the stairs. He gets his revenge with the CO2 OF DEATH, but Holly pulls him up to the entrance by using the magic power of hairpulling, which compels the victim to go wherever directed. Bart comes back with a handy watermelon (?!) and hits him with a pipe, but Holly punches him in the junk and hits him with a crate of bananas. You know, I just don’t get enough opportunities to type sentences like that, so thanks guys. Trash can to the head follows and they slug it out, but Bart uses a bag of flour to gain the advantage. Then, in one of those bizarre angles that went absolutely nowhere, Steve “Dr. Death” Williams runs out and tosses Gunn through a table, presumably in retribution for the Brawl for All, to give Holly the pin to retain at 8:15. I say “bizarre” because he was dressed like a ninja and wearing what appeared to be a Kabuki mask. I can’t even guess where they were going with that one, but thankfully they never got there. Super fun match, teetering on the edge of stupidity but luckily never quite going there. ***1/2 That’s the best mixture.

– From March 13 1999: The British Bulldog v. Test in a cage match. Huh? Bulldog wasn’t in the WWF again until after Summerslam and Test would still have been a heel at this point. I think they’ve got their dates screwed up here. Test slugs away and gets a sideslam, but Bulldog pounds him down and follows with a delayed suplex, and they clothesline each other. Bulldog recovers first with a powerslam and climbs, but Test shoves him down and goes to the top, hitting an elbow from the top of the cage. The Mean Street Posse charges in and attacks, which definitely puts this after Summerslam and the retarded amnesia angle, but Shane McMahon comes in and saves with a crossbody off the top of the cage. Bulldog walks out to win, I guess, at 3:45 while everyone is busy beating up on Shane. Pretty worthless. 1/2* What’s funny is that Test nearly killed himself doing the elbow, but all the replays were of Shane’s dive.

– From March 22 1999: Kane v. Goldust. This is not actually a match, but rather an awesome angle, as “Goldust” reveals himself to be HHH armed with a flame-thrower. Only the nose gives him away, otherwise he nails the entrance dead to rights.

– From June 7 1999: WWF World champion Undertaker v. Big Show. Taker slugs on Show to start, but gets hit with an elbowdrop for two. Show whips him into the corner and they slug it out, but Show wins that and stomps him in the corner. Headbutt follows, but Taker comes back with the choke but not the slam. Taker stomps him to the floor and they brawl out there, but Show gets sent into the post as a result. Back in, Taker comes off with a flying clothesline, but Show catches him with the chokeslam…and puts him right through the ring. Oh YEAH, forgot about that one. No contest at 6:50. **

– From July 5 1999: WWF World tag champions The Acolytes v. The Hardy Boyz. The Hardyz were little more than jobbers being mentored by Michael Hayes at this point. The Hardyz attack with a pair of dives to the floor to start, but Jeff gets sent into the post by Bradshaw and beat down on the floor. In the ring, Matt gets a neckbreaker on Faarooq and the Hardyz team up with a stereo flying splash for two. Matt walks into the spinebuster and Jeff eats a powerslam, and the Acolytes double-team Jeff in the corner. Over to Matt, but he gets booted around by Bradshaw and the Acs double-team Jeff with a clothesline. Faarooq gets two and tries the Dominator, but Jeff reverses out into a DDT for two. Bradshaw pounds on Jeff in the corner and tries a piledriver, but Matt sneaks in and boots him in the head to break it up, playing off his “head injury” at the hands of Kane. He comes back with the Clothesline From Hell for two and looks to finish with a superplex, but Jeff distracts him and Matt hits a tornado DDT to give the Hardyz their first tag titles at 4:25. This was booked pretty evenly for what it was, actually. *1/2

– From August 9 1999: WWF World tag champions The Acolytes v. Kane & X-Pac. Big brawl to start and Kane pounds on Bradshaw in the corner and gets a clothesline for two. Acolytes come back and double-team him, but Kane boots Faarooq and X-Pac comes in with a spinkick before walking into a spinebuster. Bradshaw wallops on him in the corner and pounds the ribs, then blocks a spinkick with a powerbomb for two. Faarooq with a nasty backbreaker for two. Bradshaw with the bearhug and then he follows with the big boot as this is just crazy stiff for some reason. X-Pac comes back with the enzuigiri and makes the hot tag, as Kane comes in with the flying clothesline but runs into a double-team. X-Pac comes in to help and gets beat on, but reverses the Dominator into the X-Factor for the pin and tag titles at 4:37. This should have been a no-brain concept for quite a while, with the little guy getting beat on and the big guy making the comeback, but it just never went anywhere interesting aside from the standard breakup feud. Of note here: Kane speaks for the first time, and says “Suck it.” Aww, how cute. **1/4 for all the wicked stiff shots.

– From September 6 1999: WWF World tag champions The Rock N Sock Connection v. Kane & HHH. This isn’t particularly notable for the match, but rather for the Rock’s hilarious opening monologue where he mocks Kane’s voice box gimmick. Rock N Sock were in the middle of their epic week-long tag title reign at this point. It’s funny that a team with so little real impact in the ring left such a lasting impression. Mankind’s promo is pretty funny, too, as he sends out get-well wishes to his buddy Brian (Hildebrand — sorry, no happy ending there) and then confuses Hartford with Harvard. HHH is subbing for X-Pac here, as X-Pac is showing tough love and leaving Kane alone. Rock gets a legsweep for two to start and Mankind hammers Kane down in the corner, but he no-sells it and clotheslines him. HHH wants in, but Kane doesn’t trust him, and instead gets piledriven by Mankind. Rock comes in and faceplants Kane, but walks into a clothesline and HHH finally tags himself in. Kane quickly turns on him and puts him on the floor, so HHH turns right back on Kane and hits him with the sledgehammer, into Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow to finish quickly at 4:21. *1/2

And finally…

– From October 5 1999: The “New Brood” (Hardy Boyz) v. Edge & Christian. Edge gets a rana on Matt to start and E&C get the double flapjack for two. Jeff comes in and walks into a backdrop, and gets double-suplexed for two. Matt trips up Edge and pulls him out, and Jeff follows with a baseball slide. Back in, the Hardyz with a double faceplant for two. Matt drops Edge on the top rope for two while the announcers fawn all over Terri at ringside, and Jeff gets the swanton bomb for two off Matt’s Twist of Fate. That of course would increase in devastation along with their star power. Matt comes in with a springboard moonsault, but hits the knees and it’s hot tag to Christian. Jeff quickly cradles him for two, however. He goes up and gets caught by Edge with a spear, and it’s over at 4:15. Their PPV ladder match would of course be far superior and make all four into stars. **1/2 Dead crowd really hurt this one, but this was like, I dunno, The Edgeheads v. Kendrick & London of 1999 as far as their spots on the ladder went at the time, so it’s not surprising. Today you do that match and it’s probably an automatic ****1/2 off-the-charts main event.

Final Thoughts

I think this is a really solid companion to the RAW 15 collection because sure, the documentary portion covers all the same shit that the new DVD did from 97-99, but the extras give you all kinds of crazy matches that you just don’t ever see on collections these days. The Hardyz over the Acolytes is something of a rarity now, as is the chokeslam through the ring and the forgotten I Quit match, and it’s kinda cool not to be assaulted with the same stuff we’ve seen a million times before. This was back when the WWF’s DVD library was still the untamed wilderness, so to speak, and they were taking chances and putting out new and cool stuff because they were learning how to do it instead of giving us by-the-numbers three-disc “ultimate” releases every year updated with the latest “classic” matches that happened to have taken place since the last DVD came out. So if you want to play it safe and boring, buy RAW 15, but if you want to get all the stuff people CARED about, get this one. Your call.