Irony can strike in strange places. Namely, it can appear in an injury angle where the only person who doesn’t get legitimately injured is the person who was supposed to be out with an injury.
Great-ing Gimmicks of the Past: Carlito finds Jesus – WWE, 2004
History
In 2004, John Cena was riding high on Smackdown. Unfortunately, toward the end of the year, he needed to come off TV so he could film “The Marine.â€
The story that was used was that Cena had been stabbed in the kidney during a fight in a nightclub. Things got even more suspicious when Carlito (who Cena had been feuding with) was revealed to have been in the nightclub that night as well. Carlito had actually defeated Cena to win the US title as well.
On the October 28th episode of Smackdown, Carlito had backup as Josh Mathews tried to get answers as to whether Carlito had been there for the stabbing or not. Carlito’s new bodyguard Jesus (pronounced the Spanish way – Hayzoos) shoved Mathews into the wall as Carlito revealed that he’d left the club when Cena had shown up. And because this was Carlito, he had Jesus hold Mathews still to give him a faceful of apple.
The next week, Carlito and Jesus were backstage when Kurt Angle came up. He had a problem. Angle was putting together a team to face a team captained by Eddie Guerrero at Survivor Series. Angle already had himself, Mark Jindrak, and Luther Reigns, but needed a fourth man. Carlito accepted the offer and joined Angle’s team.
A week later, Carlito and Jesus joined Michael Cole and Tazz at commentary for a match where Eddie Guerrero and Rob Van Dam faced off against Reigns and Jindrak. Carlito and Jesus interfered continuously throughout the match until Eddie threw a chair to Jesus and dropped to the mat. The referee spotted Jesus holding the chair and ejected Carlito and Jesus.
Eddie and Van Dam won the match and then Eddie announced his fourth man at Survivor Series. It would be Eddie, Van Dam, Big Show, and the returning John Cena. Needless to say, that sent Carlito backstage to complain to GM Teddy Long, who firmly told Carlito that the match was set.
The main event that night was Big Show against Kurt Angle. Eddie and Van Dam came out to even the odds at ringside, as Angle had been accompanied by his Survivor Series team. After taking out Eddie and Van Dam, Jindrak and Reigns hit the ring to save Angle from a chokeslam, which drew a DQ. After the match, the three of them continued their assault.
At Survivor Series, Carlito was the first man eliminated. Cena hit the ring and Carlito took off. Carlito and Jesus ran outside, hopped into a car, and took off, which resulted in a countout for Carlito. Although Angle would defeat Van Dam, he wound up on the wrong side of a 3 on 1 advantage and wound up losing the match.
Carlito, now suffering a shoulder injury, had a meeting with Teddy Long on Smackdown. Long had set up a rematch between Cena and Carlito for the title. Long refused to cancel the match and told Carlito he would be stripped of the belt if he didn’t defend it.
Carlito was quickly defeated after Cena neutralized Jesus. After the match, Jesus attacked Cena in the kidney area and stole Cena’s trademark chain, leaving Cena to be stretchered out.
The next week Carlito and Jesus were interviewed. Carlito awarded Jesus the chain, and Jesus told Cena if he wanted it back that he’d just received his wrestling license.
The next week saw Carlito setting up a match between Jesus and Charlie Haas. The match ended when Jesus popped Haas in the chest with the chain.
Afterward, Long came out and called them thugs. He then announced that Jesus would be facing Cena for the title at Armageddon.
Jesus faced Haas the next week in a street fight. Carlito was immediately ejected, and he replied by spitting apple in the referee’s face. Carlito dragged Dawn Marie out next, which distracted Haas long enough for Jesus to clock him with the chain. Afterward, Carlito and Jesus left as Dawn Marie and Jackie Gayda checked on Haas.
At Armageddon, Cena quickly demolished Jesus to not only retain his belt but also reclaim his chain. After the match, Cena cracked Carlito with the chain as well.
And that was that.
Analysis
It’s funny that the one guy in this angle who was supposed to be injured is the only one who really wasn’t. As mentioned at the start of the article, Cena was written out because he’d supposedly been stabbed during a nightclub fight. Carlito soon went down with a shoulder injury and had to drop the title back to Cena quickly. The day after the Armageddon match, Jesus went to the doctor and was immediately advised he needed surgery for a neck injury.
Although the idea of a bodyguard for Carlito was a sound one, the entire plan was derailed by injury. Jesus never returned to WWE programming and was soon released. Carlito wound up feuding with Teddy Long over “unfair†treatment.
In addition, the angle reportedly infuriated TNA wrestler Johnny Devine. The entire Cena injury angle had come about following news of Devine and Andy Douglas getting involved in a nightclub brawl in Nashville, Tennessee. Both were injured, with Devine getting stabbed in the stomach which resulted in him undergoing surgery that wound up removing his gall bladder. Devine was also reportedly upset because Cena’s lack of a scar had been explained away by him saying that the doctors had fixed him up, while Devine had a scar that ran all the way up his stomach.
Where are they now?
John Cena won the World title at Wrestlemania 21, and was drafted to Raw in June of 2005. Cena remains on Raw today and is scheduled to challenge Randy Orton and Triple H in a three-way match at Wrestlemania 24.
Carlito was also drafted to Raw in June of 2005. His first act was to defeat Shelton Benjamin and win the Intercontinental title, which he lost to Ric Flair at that year’s Unforgiven. Carlito requested his release from the WWE in late 2007, but was convinced to stay by Vince McMahon himself. Carlito remains with the WWE on Raw today.
As mentioned above, Jesus went through surgery shortly after the street fight with Cena, but was released from the WWE in April of 2005. Since then, Aaron Aguilera has returned to the indy scene. In late 2007, he and Kaos united as Los Pochos Guapos for MTV’s Wrestling Society X. Aguilera is also appearing for All-Japan Pro Wrestling as ZODIAC, a member of the Voodoo Murders faction.
