In Hindsight: American Idol – The Fantastic(?) Five

Shows

Since it’s Neil Diamond week, it was much guaranteed that we’d hear “America” and “Sweet Caroline”. But since Kristy Lee Cook is gone it was a mystery as to who would choose the most obvious of choices this week. Oh, and Paula does the equivalent of a wrestler audibly calling spots during a resthold. I’m sure it was an honest mistake that had nothing to do with the fact that Paula is seemingly on meds or is drunk…

1.David Cook – My hope is that voters take a good look at the singers and realize that Cook is trying to win this competition not only by singing, but by showing his versatility with performances and arrangements a la Blake Lewis. Then again, Blake didn’t win last year, did he?

2.Syesha Mercado – What would it take to get people to vote for Syesha? Nothing, it seems, since she’s Queen of the bottom two.

3.David Archuleta – Like I said last week, EXACTLY the same. Even worse, he proved he can’t do an up-tempo performance. David Archuleta is John Stevens with a better voice, people. I hope that you now see that this guy is exactly what we don’t need in pop music.

4.Jason Castro – Jason had a really poor week, saved from the bottom by virtue of the fact that Brooke was so uneven. But people aren’t gonna be talking about his singing. No, people are going to be talking about Paula’s “spontaneous” comments, no doubt pre-written during the dress rehearsals. The thing is, this isn’t THAT big a deal – you know that the judges are taking stock of every performance, whether practice or real. Still, this managed to “break the fourth wall”, as it were, and lends credence to those who champion that reality shows “aren’t really real”. Which unless you’re absolutely brainwashed you know anyways. So enjoy the faux-pas for what it was. And if you can’t get enough of it, here’s the link

5.Brooke White – As I said before, an uneven performance from Brooke, but she came through with her second song, and hopefully this pulls her out of the slump she’s been in. Of course, Carly pulled out of her slump, and look what happened.

Logically speaking, Brooke should probably be saying goodbye, but Syesha is always hanging around the B2, so it’s hard not to think that she’ll be gone. So I’m going with Syesha.

Kevin has been an Insider since 2003, writing on a variety of topics ranging from The Amazing Race to Mixed Martial Arts. His current hobbies include Fantasy Football, Sporcle, travelling, making liberal use of his DVR and wondering what the heck he's gonna do when his two daughters are old enough to date. You can follow Kevin on Twitter (@starvenger).