The SmackDown Report

Edge opens us up by telling us tonight he will be celebrating the career of The Undertaker through videos, the irony being that it will be his final appearance on SmackDown albeit his first appearance on The Cutting Edge.

Batista opens us up to hype his match against Shawn Michaels this weekend; at One Night Stand he is going to hurt Shawn Michaels. Batista says that the winner of the TLC Match should look out, but Vickie Guerrero interrupts to MASSIVE heat from the crowd. Vickie says it’s great that Batista is looking to the future, but there’s no guarantee that he’ll be here and has no right to challenge the World Heavy Weight Champion. Vickie says if Batista loses to Shawn Michaels at One Night Stand, than not only he looks bad but SmackDown will look bad and Vickie Guerrero in turn will look bad. Batista tells Vickie that this situation has nothing to do with her. Batista tells her to worry about Edge being drafted or the beating he’ll get at One Night Stand. Hawkins steps up and tells Batista to treat her with respect and keep his mouth shut, so Batista challenges him – Hawkins and Ryder begin storming down to the ring. Vickie stops them, has another go at Batista before booking Hawkins and Ryder vs. Batista and anyone who wants to volunteer to be his partner.

Recap of The Undertaker’s debut at Survivor Series 1990. I cannot wait to see this Survivor Series anthology set, or the SummerSlam anthology set.

Matt Hardy is walking backstage!

Commercials.

Matt Hardy vs. Elijah Bourke
Lock up and Bourke goes after the arm but Hardy gets a hammerlock in return. Hardy rams Bourke head first into the turnbuckle, clothesline gets a one count over Bourke. Bourke with a “four up” to Hardy. Bourke with elbows to Hardy, following up with a sleeper hold. Hardy runs into a high elbow from Bourke. Bourke up onto the second turnbuckle, Hardy knocks him onto the apron but Bourke drops Hardy throat first on the top rope. Bourke with a second turnbuckle first drop for a two count over Hardy. Bourke with a snap mare following up with a sleeper hold. Hardy escapes the sleeper hold via back drop. Hardy with the second turnbuckle elbow to Bourke. Bourke blocks the Side Effect, but Hardy nails it moments later for a two count. Bourke gets hit with a clothesline and Hardy goes for the bulldog, Bourke blocks it but gets hit with the Twist of Fate for the three count.
Winner: Matt Hardy

Was just there, not the match I was hoping for between these two. I’ll have forgotten about it in about ten minutes. Two out of Ten. I’d like to see Elijah Bourke taken off SmackDown in the draft, where to though I’m not too sure.

MVP is backstage with Eve and the pair are badly synced. Porter says he’s still the most talented on the roster and isn’t being utilized. Jamie Noble interrupts saying that Porter is making excuses, Porter stops Noble and calls him half a man. Noble isn’t happy about Porter’s reaction, so the pair get all up in each other’s grill and Noble challenges Porter to a match.

Finlay vs. Chuck Palumbo
I miss the first few seconds, but Palumbo kicks Finlay into the corner and nails the cool belly to belly. Finlay sends Palumbo shoulder first into the steel post before getting in an arm bar. Palumbo sends Finlay outside, where Finlay drop toe holds Palumbo shoulder first into the steel steps. Back in the ring, Finlay dropkicks the shoulder for a one count pinfall. Palumbo with a shoulder block to Finlay in the corner, a second attempt misses. Finlay off the ropes into a big boot for a two count. Palumbo with a shoulder breaker on Finlay for a two count. Palumbo off the second rope with a leg drop, but Finlay moves out of the way for a simple yet effective moment. On the outside, Palumbo whips Finlay into the ring apron – Hornswoggle distracts Palumbo and Finlay tries to regain the advantage, but that proves futile. Hornswoggle returns to under the ring, Palumbo pulls a steel chain off of his bike and nails Finlay with it!
Winner: Finlay

A good match. I like the idea of these two being in the ring together, but I don’t really care about Hornswoggle’s involvement anymore. Four out of Ten.

Hawkins and Ryder are contemplating the possibility of Batista having a partner tonight, but Vickie is adamant that it’ll be a handicap match. Noble walks in and says that Porter insulted him, so Vickie books the match. In a cute touch, Noble resumes trying to convince Vickie to book the match even though she’s already booked it.

Footage of The Undertaker vs. Mankind, Hell In A Cell. Undertaker is Edge’s guest on The Cutting Edge, tonight.

Commercials.

John Morrison w/ The Miz vs. CM Punk
Man, I seriously hope that Morrison and Miz go back to SmackDown on the draft. This match is going to be very alluring, for me at least. Miz gets sent backstage before the match even begins. Punk gets a one count school boy right away. Morrison off the ropes into a knee from Punk. Punk blocks a kick and nails an elbow and kick of his own. Morrison drops Punk neck first on the top rope. Morrison with a jawbreaker. Morrison with mounted forearms to Punk for a one count. Morrison with a full nelson on Punk, Punk turns it into a Go To Sleep attempt but Morrison blocks. Punk with the high knee bulldog combo for a two count pinfall. Morrison ducks a clothesline and comes off the ropes into a power slam. Foley distracts me by saying that Morrison told him that his abs can cut cheese. Punk falls behind a clothesline and turns it into the Go To Sleep for the three count.
Winner: CM Punk

Well, it was energetic and gave me the image of Morrison grating cheese with his abs. On the other hand, it went for just a few minutes. Certainly not the free TV awesomeness of their pre-WrestleMania match. Three out of Ten.

Up next: Hawkins and Ryder vs. Batista and ???

Commercials.

Batista makes his entrance and reveals that he does not need a partner. Curt Hawkins, Zach Ryder and Vickie Guerrero make their way on out. Guerrero declares that the match will be a handicap match, but Batista says he doesn’t need a partner – doesn’t mean he doesn’t have one. The Big Show comes on out and wheels Guerrero backstage.

Curt Hawkins and Zach Ryder vs. Batista and The Big Show
Hawkins and Batista begin. Hawkins with a headlock, off the ropes into a shoulder block. Batista spinebusters Hawkins into the corner and nails Show’s trademark chest slap. Show tags in and shows Batista how the hell it’s done. Ryder in via Show dragging him in. Chest slap to Ryder. Batista tagged in. Hawkins gets a super secret tag, and attacks Batista from behind. Ryder back in with offence, but Batista regains control. Batista with a scoop slam, knocks Hawkins, and nails a Spinebuster to Ryder. Hawkins off the top into a Showstopper Chokeslam while Batista nails Ryder with a Batista Bomb! Batista covers for the three count.
Winners: Batista and The Big Show

Why haven’t they had these two feud yet? Honestly? So which one’s getting traded then? More likely Batista. Three out of Ten. Fun destruction of Hawkins and Ryder.

Still to come: Cutting Edge with Undertaker.

Video footage of Undertaker winning the 2007 Royal Rumble. Might watch that tonight.

Commercials.

Cherry has a black eye in the trainer’s room. Maryse comes in, saying her ankle hurts because of how hard she kicked Cherry’s face … Cherry does not approve.

Cole and Foley run down the One Night Stand Match bar Phoenix vs. Melina. Really looking forward to this card; hopefully they give everything enough time.

Montel Vontavious Porter is walking backstage!

Commercials.

Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Jamie Noble
I miss Nidia. Lock up and Porter forces Noble into the corner. Noble with a drop toe hold to Porter and we … cut to Porter kneeing Noble in the gut? Ugh, CLIPPING! I HATE incomplete matches. Porter covers for a two count. Porter whips Noble chest first into the turnbuckles. Porter hooks arms to keep Noble up, and uses his other arm to elbow Noble in the gut. Porter with an abdominal stretch. Porter with a fireman’s drop. Porter off the ropes into a dropkick to the knee from Noble! Noble with an awesome senton in the corner. Noble goes up top and nails a knee drop to Porter for a two count pinfall. Porter hangs Noble on the rope guts first and boots Noble down for the three count.
Winner: Montel Vontavious Porter

I liked it for what it was. Four out of Ten.

Recap of Undertaker vs. Batista at WrestleMania 23. Might watch that tonight too, actually.

Still to come: The Cutting Edge.

Commercials.

Next week: Cousin Sal vs. Santino Marella. Course, a RAW feud on SmackDown!

Shannon Moore vs. Vladimir Koslov
Koslov military presses Moore onto the top rope. Koslov with a nice belly to belly. Koslov wins with the reverse DDT.
Winner: Vladimir Koslov

-Five out of Ten. PLEASE send Koslov to RAW or ECW or back to dark match status,

Mick Foley: “Do you know how many flannels you could buy with a million dollars?”.

Commercials.

Michelle McCool vs. Maryse w/ Deuce and Domino
Lock up and Mc nails a nice takedown to start. Lock up and Mc with a fireman’s carry. CLIP to Mc kicking Maryse in the face. Maryse with elbows to the face of Mc. Maryse foot chokes Mc in the corner. Maryse off the ropes into a big boot by Maryse. Domino distracts Mc and Maryse clotheslines Mc’s knee from behind. Maryse gets in a single legged boston crab, but Cherry makes her way on out – and Mc reverses the boston crab into the heel hook for the submission victory.
Winner: Michelle McCool

I like the idea of Mc getting a submission finisher, but she should have something different like the Texas Cloverleaf. Two out of Ten. SmackDown Diva Standards.

Recap of Edge defeat The Undertaker post Cage match last year.

Commercials.

And it’s Cutting Edge time, with the ring set up ala TLC and the belt hanging above the ring. Edge has had a spectre hanging over his head since his came to SmackDown last year, and that spectre is the Undertaker. Edge says for one long year they’ve battled for the World Heavy Weight Championship, and that this weekend it comes to an end. Edge makes clear that if Undertaker loses, he won’t be drafted to another show – he will be fully banished from WWE. Edge says Undertaker’s career has been phenomenal, and he introduces a video of the pair in TLC Matches … oh, wait, Undertaker hasn’t gotten any TLC Highlights. Touche. Edge says he has cemented his legacy in TLC Matches, and he has defined TLC matches before rolling his Rated R Video Clip complete with awesome Indiana Jonesish introductions. Got to love the Edge highlight videos. Edge introduces The Undertaker. Edge says it must be tough for The Undertaker, being his final appearance on SmackDown – so Edge says he’s brought something which might make him feel a little more comfortable, cue La Familia bringing out a Casket. Undertaker chases Edge out of the ring and takes the fight right to La Familia, the numbers game looks to have him beat but Edge attacks Undertaker from behind with a Steel Chair. La Familia continue the assault before rolling him into the casket. Edge symbolically climbs the ladder in the ring, but the bell gongs and the lights go out – when they return, Undertaker is next to Edge on the ladder! Awesome visual as the pair face off. Undertaker tosses Edge into Chavo and Neely, fights off The Edge Heads and goes to ChokeSlam Edge through the table – but Zach Ryder attacks Undertaker from behind, only to suffer a Last Ride through the table! Mucho awesome closing segment.

Matt Hardy defeats Elijah Bourke: 2/10
Finlay defeats Chuck Palumbo: 4/10
CM Punk defeats John Morrison: 3/10
Batista and The Big Show defeat Curt Hawkins and Zach Ryder: 3/10
Montel Vontavious Porter defeats Jamie Noble: 4/10
Vladimir Koslov defeats Shannon Moore: -5/10
Michelle McCool defeats Maryse: 2/10
SmackDown 30/05/08: 11/70

With exception of Undertaker / Edge, this show just seemed to be put on to pass the time. Some of these matches (Hardy / Bourke, Finlay / Palumbo, Porter / Noble) showed off the midcard and upper midcard in very nice fashion. I am genuinely looking forward to One Night Stand and should buy it, I think most of the matches have the potential to be quite good. The series between Edge and Taker has been good so far, as has HHH / Orton (their previous Last Man Standing match was good too) so we should be able to rest assured that those matches are going to be good. Until next week, have a good one!

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