From the UK: WWF Backlash 2000

I’ve been meaning to do this one for ages but I decided against it for a long time due to the fact it features a certain child killing piece of shite. However, it’s been a year so let’s get at her because this show is damn good.

We’re in Washington DC

Your hosts are Jim “Bah God, Pet Coon, No Good Bastard, Barbecue Sauce, Don’t Draft me to Smackdown Please” Ross and Jerry “Look at the Puppies J.R, Please Don’t make me work with Michael Cole again” Lawler

WWF Tag Team Championships
Champion – Edge and Christian
Vs
Road Dogg and X-Pac w/ Tori

Debra is here to do guest ring intros and she’s certainly had a few too many tequilas on the plane ride over. Edge, Christian and Road Dogg were sort to tweeners here where as X-Pac was hated by all from kids, to adults to tribes people in Africa who’ve never even seen a picture of a pot of jam. Case in point, a big “X-Pac Sucks” chants begins immediately. Edge and Mr. Waltman start us out with some chain wrestling that serves the purpose of establishing E & C as the faces for tonight. X-Pac spits in Edge’s face, God knows what STD you’d get from that, and tags in Road Dogg. Christian maintains the advantage on Road Dogg but a cheap shot allows an X-Pac tag. Christian gets a power slam and stupidly goes up for a 10 punch in the corner allowing Road Dogg to drop his neck on the top rope for the cut off. Christian goes spine first into the steps on the outside.

Road Dogg gets the front facelock leading to the ever popular false tag spot. Tori gets her two cents in by choking Christian in the corner and miraculously does it without messing up. Must be less peroxide in her hair tonight, those fumes are mother grabbers. Christian attempts to fight back but Shake, Rattle and Roll puts a stop to that. Both Christian and Road Dogg double cross body each other for the double down. X- Pac tries to stop the tag but while the ref is getting him out, Edge sneaks in with a diving head butt. Christian gets two from that and makes the tag shortly after. Edge is in and he’s a House En Fuego. Sit Out Powerbomb gets Edge two. X-Pac hits Tori by accident allowing an Edge roll up for two. X-Pac gets the X-Factor in the ring but the ref is distracted tending to Tori allowing Christian to get a shot with the ring bell to retain.

WINNERS – EDGE AND CHRISTIAN
Time – 9:23
**1/2 – Energetic opener that got the crowd going.

Meanwhile, The Rock arrives in a limo

WWF Light-Heavyweight Championship
Champion – Dean Malenko
Vs
Scotty 2 Hotty

Malenko screwed Scotty out of the belt and this here’s the rematch. It’s a slugfest to start that goes Scotty’s way. Scotty gets a back suplex but stupidly stops to Moon Walk allowing Malenko to jump him. Scotty fights back but eats a clothesline on a bulldog attempt. Malenko takes Scotty outside for some punishment and brings him back in for some slugging in the corner. Scotty tries fighting back but Malenko dropkicks the leg to stop him in his tracks. Malenko goes to town on the leg, giving it a vicious beating in his clinical Ice Man fashion. Crowd stays with Scotty though which was a testament to his overness at the time. Scotty gets a desperation enzuiguri but Malenko soon cuts him off again. Malenko keeps on the leg.

Scotty gets a roll up out of nowhere for two but Malenko is again quickly back in control. Scotty and Malenko take a double tumble to the outside. Scotty gains the advantage but goes up top like a fool allowing Malenko to SuperPlex him for the double down. Backslide gets two for Scotty. Malenko goes for the Cloverleaf but Scotty counters with another roll up for two. Scotty makes the big comeback and gets the worm but angers me by hopping on the injured the leg. Malenko tries using the ropes for an illegal pin but the ref spots him. Tiger Driver only finds two for Malenko, as does a Powerslam. Malenko guillotines Scotty on the top rope and heads up but Scotty fights him off and goes for a SuperPlex but Malenko counters in Mid Air with a DDT to retain

WINNER – DEAN MALENKO
Time – 12:59
***3/4 – One of the best matches in the belts history.

The McMahon’s are backstage plotting an evil scheme to bring down the Justice League. Oh yeah and Triple H wants to retain his title or something.

Bull Buchanan and Big Boss Man
Vs
The Acolytes

Bradshaw wastes no time smashing some mouths with his unique smash mouth style, including a top rope shoulder block on Bull for two. Bull shows some nice agility to flip out of a back body drop but Bradshaw doesn’t take kindly to people getting over in his matches and Bull is soon getting destroyed in the corner. Boss Man comes in to get pummelled by the smash mouthing style of Faarooq. Bradshaw adds some extra Smash Mouthage on the outside. Boss Man continues getting worked over but Faarooq misses a charge in the corner making him former angry militant black man in peril. Bull and Boss Man go through the usual punching and rest holds but the fans don’t care. The match pretty much falls apart now with everyone not just on different pages but in different libraries. Bull gets two from a SuperPlex on Bradshaw. Bradshaw nearly kills Bull with the Clothesline from Smash Mouth, but Boss Man saves. Boss Man hits Bradshaw with the nightstick allowing Bull to hit the Scissors Kick for the win.

WINNERS – BULL AND BOSS MAN
Time – 7:41
* – Meh

The Hardys are backstage and agree they’ll be no friends tonight. Ditto for The Holly’s

WWF Hardcore Championship
Champion – Crash Holly
Vs
Matt Hardy
Vs
Jeff Hardy
Vs
Tazz
Vs
Perry Saturn
Vs
Hardcore Holly

Crash was getting dangerously over here with the whole 24/7 thing. Tazz was still semi-bad arse here before his disastrous heel turn and feud with Jerry Lawler. The rules here are that the challengers can only pin Crash to win where as Crash just has to pin one of his challengers. Crash immediately attempts to bail, as he runs down the ramp and climbs the stage. That ends badly for him as he’s thrown off By Matt. Matt then fills his quota of insane move of the night by diving on everyone. They all no sell it and are up fighting 2 seconds later but I appreciate the thought. Everyone comes back to ring where everyone hits everyone with everything.

Everyone fights over pinning Crash and the action gets pretty hard to call. Crowd is pretty quiet here. They really should have done the whole diving off the stage thing at the end of the match because there’s no way they could follow it with the stuff they’re doing here. Jeff gets a ladder from under the ring and that finally wakes the crowd up. Everyone takes a beating from the ladder. Jeff Swanton’s Crash from the top of the ladder but The Hardy’s fight over the pin. Tazz gets the Tazzmission to a big pop but Saturn nails him with a stop sign. Everyone crashes and burns allowing Crash to drape a hand over Tazz for the win.

WINNER – CRASH HOLLY
Time – 12:20
** – Pretty lacklustre aside from the big spots. This stands as a testament to how they wasted Tazz though, he was really over in this match.

Coach is with Shane McMahon. He’s going to play it fair as ref tonight apparently.

Kurt Angle
Vs
Big Show

This was during Big Show’s “I want to have fun” period where he was dressing as Rikishi and Fat Bastard. He ups the ante here by coming out dressed as Hulk Hogan and calling himself “The Showster”. He cuts an hilarious promo doing a perfect Hogan impression. Angle jumps Show to start, with show doing the old no sell (called so by J.R). Big boot and Leg Drop only get two for Showster, who does he think he is? Sid Justice? Angle channels Mongo McMichael with the chop block and goes to work on Showster’s leg. This pisses Showster off turning him back into Big Show again. Show Stopper ends it soon after.

WINNER – BIG SHOW
Time – 2:57
*1/2 – The match barely lasted more than a couple of minutes but it was top quality entertainment

Trish Stratus and T & A are backstage. Trish taunts Bubba Ray about not being able to out her through a table. D-Von is with Bubba and tells him to be a man and get down to business.

The Dudley Boyz
Vs
T & A w/ Trish Stratus

The storyline here is that Bubba wants to put Trish through a table but she always kisses him before he can perform the deed. Sounds silly but it was a pretty effective storyline. Dudleyz jump start the match and Bubba chases Trish only to get clotheslined by Test. Albert and D-Von go at it in the ring with the action going D-Vons way. Bubba comes in and pounds away. Dudleyz were on the cusp of being the top Babyface team in the company here while T & A were pretty much established as heels after an horrendous start as faces.

Dudleyz continue working over Albert and get the wassup head butt before the wassup. Albert gets the bicycle kick on D-Von to pretty much make him face in peril, even though he’s not really a face yet. T & A actually have some good double teams. If only Test had followed Albert’s lead and gone to Japan to hone his craft, that and not gotten veins in his arms bigger than cucumbers. D-Von gets a spinning neckbreaker on Test but ref doesn’t see him tag out. Yeah the Dudleyz are pretty much faces now, the fans are chanting for tables and everything.

D-Von gets a nice top rope sunset flip for two but Albert stays in control. Albert heads up to the second rope but stops to yell at Bubba and ends up getting SuperPlexed. That’s like the 5th time someone has used that move on this show. Bubba gets the tag and he’s an inbred on fire! It all breaks loose with the Dudleyz getting the upper hand but before they can get the 3-D, Trish causes a distraction allowing a Test big boot for the win.

WINNERS – T & A
Time – 11:04
**1/4 – Solid match, but it’s not the match that matters now as the Dudleyz clean house and grab Trish. She tries to kiss her way out of danger again but this time it doesn’t work and she tastes wood. This is an important moment as it officially turned the Dudleyz face and led to them becoming the top team in the WWF.

Meanwhile, Eddie Guerrero and Chyna show up in their Chevie after getting back from a party just in time for the next match. Fancy that.

WWF European Championship
Champion – Eddie Guerrero w/ Chyna
Vs
Essa Rios w/ Lita

This was just after Chyna became Eddie’s mama cita. Eddie is going to have to wrestle in suit pants tonight and a bow tie. He’s my hero. Eddie starts things off with a dropkick but Rios counters a tilt a whirl by flipping out in an awesome spot and gets one of his own. Rios sends Eddie outside but Eddie dodges a body press sending Rios to the floor. Eddie sends Rios back in where he gets the springboard senton. Rios gets sent outside where Chyna gets a few cheap shots before sending him back in. Rios fights back with a dropkick and heads up with a missile one for two. Rios counters a Powerbomb with a lucha arm drag and nearly kills Eddie with a monkey flip. Eddie sends Rios outside again where Chyna gets some more cheap shots.

Eddie follows Rios out with a plancha as the pace is starting to pick up. Eddie goes for a Powerbmb on the floor but Rios back drops him out. Lita tries to dive onto Eddie but Chyna shoves her off the top to the outside. Rios gets an Asai Moonsault onto Eddie similar to Shawn and Flair at Mania this year. Not just content with that, Rios dives onto Eddie again for a big pop. Chyna makes her presence known again by crotching Rios on the top allowing Eddie to get the 77th SuperPlex of the night for two. Eddie gets a Brainbuster and heads up but Rios recovers in time to leap up with an arm drag. He attempts the Moonsault but Eddie gets his knees up and follows that with a Spinning Splash Mountain Bomb for the win.

WINNER – EDDIE GUERRERO
Time – 8:43
***1/4 – Started slow but got really good at the end. Lita strips Chyna of her evening gown post match but no one really minds that much.

Triple H and Stephanie are backstage. They’re very confident. Vince McMahon is there too and suggests that Steve Austin might not be here tonight.

WWF Intercontinental Championship
Champion – Chris Benoit
Vs
Chris Jericho

And so my Benoit avoidance ends after a year. Lock up leads to both men tenaciously fighting over it to the outside. Back inside we come for the chop fest and that goes Benoits way. Jericho decides to fight back with fists. Benoit fires back with the Multiple Germans but Jericho is able to grab the ropes to stop the third one so Benoit just back drops him over the top rope to the outside. Benoit attempts a tope but misses and his heads bounces off the floor sending shivers down my spine. The fight continues on the outside as Benoit dropkicks the steps into Jericho’s knees. Back inside, Benoit takes over targeting Jericho’s midsection. Jericho is taking a monster of a beating here.

Benoit uses the abdominal stretch which isn’t usually part of his arsenal. Jericho fights out and gets a running elbow followed by the Lionsault but his midsection hurts too much to capitalise. He finally gets a two from it but Benoit is soon up and bringing the pain again with some vicious chops. Jericho gets two from a bulldog and delivers some chops of his own but Benoit keeps fighting. Jericho drops Benoit ribs first on the top rope but gets swatted away on a second rope dropkick. They end on top with Jericho going for a Super Back Drop but Benoit shifts his weight to fall on top for two.

Jericho counters a backslide with the Double Powerbomb. I wish he’d bring that move back actually it was really cool. Jericho goes for the cover but Benoit counters with the crossface as I suddenly get very uncomfortable. Jericho makes the ropes but Benoit drags him back to the middle to lock it in again but Jericho fights out and locks in the Lion Tamer. Benoit makes the ropes to stop that. Ref gets bumped allowing Benoit to nail Jericho with the belt for two. Benoit snap suplexes Jericho on the belt and heads up for the Swandive but Jericho holds the belt up hitting Benoit in the face with it for the DQ.

WINNER – CHRIS BENOIT BY DQ
Time – 15:08
****1/4

The Rock is backstage and cuts his usual awesome promo ahead of the main event tonight. I was so pumped for this back in the day

WWF Championship
Guest Referee – Shane McMahon
Champion – Triple H w/ Vince McMahon and Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley
Vs
The Rock w/ Steve Austin

The story here was that Vince McMahon screwed The Rock at Wrestlemania and stacked the deck here to make sure he wouldn’t win. Linda McMahon stepped in and put Austin in Rock’s corner to even the odds. However, Austin hasn’t arrived yet. Going in to this show Rock was one of my favourite wrestlers and I just hated Triple H so I was really rooting for Rock here. I don’t know whether it’s my TV but HHH is so orange that he looks like the bald dude from the old tango adverts. Crowd wants Austin but he isn’t there. Slugfest to start and that goes Rock’s way. HHH goes for the Pedigree early but Rock back body drops out. Shane causes a distraction allowing HHH to get a neckbreaker.

Rock fights back with a back suplex but HHH sends him over the top to the outside. You see that why HHH was such an effective heel, he could cheat and break the rules but he was still good enough to do things on his own and that gave him credibility. Heels don’t always have to be weak, it’s the afces job to keep fighting. Anyway Vince McMahon makes a nuisance of himself by sending Rock into the post and allowing HHH to take over. It’s Sleeper time for Rocky, and this allows HHH a perfect chance to cheat by using the ropes. Rock fights out of the Sleeper but gets immediately clotheslined allowing HHH to talk some smack. Rock counters a 10 punch with a stun gun and fires back with some punches but it’s a double clothesline for the double down. Shane counts both men but also tries to revive HHH slyly in a funny spot.

While Shane is accidentally-on-purpose distracted, Vince nails Rock with the title belt for two. Rock keeps fighting and sends HHH to the outside. He follows him out where he slams his face onto the announcers table. Back inside, Rock gets a DDT but Shane refuses to count so Rock decks him. HHH knocks Rock outside and sends him shoulder first into the steps. HHH sets Rock up for a Pedigree on the Spanish table but Rock fights back and end sup Rock Bottoming both Shane and HHH through the table for a massive pop. Vince’s look of shock is awesome. Rock throws HHH back in the ring but now it’s Vince’s turn to get involved and he quickly regrets it as Rock grabs him. HHH saves with a low blow and gets the Pedigree but there’s no ref so Patterson and Brisco run out in ref shirts.

Rock kicks out at two so Brisco and Patterson help put the boots to him. Vince grabs a chair and splatters Rock with it. Just when it seems like all is lost, Austin shows up with a chair and beats the living piss and vinegar out of anything that moves as the crowd goes insane. Now it’s time for Linda McMahon to come out with fired ref Earl Hebner. Stephanie gets shoved down to take her out of the equation. Rock delivers the People’s Elbow to finally end HHH’s title reign and the crowd go fucking mental.

WINNER – THE ROCK
Time – 19:24
****1/2 – This is still one of my favourite all time matches. HHH would win it back next month but this was important as it finally gave something back to the fans after months of HHH winning all the time. I was marking out like crazy back in the day and it’s still an awesome moment.

What more do you want? It’s Backlash 2000! It’s probably the best non-Big Four pay per view the WWF did during this period. A must have without question.

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