The SmarK 24/7 Rant for Boston Garden

The SmarK 24/7 Rant for Boston Garden Show – March 18 1989

– Taped from Boston, MA

– Your hosts are Tony Schiavone & Lord Alfred Hayes. Now there’s a combo you didn’t hear much of.

The Conquistadors v. The Young Stallions

Funny faux pas from Mel Phillips here, as he accidentally introduces "Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty" before the Conquistadors angrily correct him and the disappointed crowd gets Paul Roma and Jim Powers instead. Conquistador #1 attacks Powers from behind after some stalling, but Powers dropkicks him to the floor. #2 switches in as a result, but the ref actually catches it and forces them back out. And then he turns around and they just switch right back off again. No matter, as Powers controls with armdrags and Hayes speculates that maybe we just won’t see Paul Roma in the ring at all. We should be so lucky. And indeed, Roma tags in and continues working the arm, and the Stallions do some cheating of their own. Remember kids: Two wrongs make a right. I understand that’s also a very effective legal defense strategy. The Stallions double-team #1 for two and Powers holds an armbar, but #2 comes in with a cheapshot on Powers to break it up. The Stallions get a double-team elbow on #1 for two, and Roma goes back to the arm again. They switch off and work on that for a while, but the Conquistadors switch off and drop Roma on the top turnbuckle to take over. #1 pounds away in the corner and they double-whip Roma into the corner for two. #2 goes up with a forearm to the back, and #1 switches in behind the ref’s back and does the same. #1 holds him down with the Vulcan nerve hold, but Roma elbows out of it and comes back with a sunset flip for two. #2 backdrops him for two and they go back to the nerve hold. Roma gets a cross body for two, but Powers gets sucked in and the heels switch off again, leading to a knee in the corner and a fistdrop from #1 that gets two. Roma fights back with a clothesline and it’s the double KO, which leads to the hot tag for Powers. He rams #1 into the turnbuckles for the 10 count, then it’s the same for #2. Double noggin knocker gets rid of #1, and the Stallions double-team #2 into a missile dropkick from Roma to finish at 14:00. Good formula tag opener. **1/2 The replay shows that their celebratory high-five was, in fact, a missed spot.

Rockin’ Robin v. Judy Martin

This is non-title because Martin hasn’t yet earned a shot at the ultra-prestigious Women’s title. Martin powers her down and tosses her, but Robin runs around the ring and then comes back in to slug Martin down. She whiffs on a dropkick and then runs into a boot in the corner, and Martin gets two. Criss-cross and they clothesline each other, but Robin recovers first and drops an elbow for two. Martin grabs a headlock, but Martin plays "got your nose" and starts working on the arm. Bulldog gets two, as the foot is on the ropes. Martin boots her down and drops a knee, and that gets two. Suplex gets two. Avalanche works well, but a second one misses and Robin rolls her up at 7:45 to finish. Slow and dull. *1/2

Mr. Perfect v. Rugged Ronnie Garvin

Now this could be interesting. Perfect gives him the trashtalk and gets slugged to the floor as a result. Back in, Perfect is all "You want boxing, huh?" and then promptly gets made into a buffoon before running away again. Who’s dumb enough to challenge Ron Garvin to a boxing match? So he tries wrestling instead and slaps Garvin off the lockup, then starts throwing chops. Garvin returns that and hits him with a right that Perfect sells with a trademark dive over the top rope. A hard-hitting face and overselling heel like Perfect is a really good combination. Garvin pounds away on Perfect and headbutts him to the floor again. Back in, Perfect gets a cheapshot and fires some forearms, then adds a shot to the gut to put him down. Perfect grabs a headlock and holds that for a while, and Garvin tries to reverse into a top wristlock before a hairpull turns the tide again for Perfect. Garvin fights up and they get into a slugfest, which Perfect loses badly. Perfect tries a sunset flip, but Garvin pounds him to block it, and drops an elbow for two. Garvin keeps coming with a sleeper, and the Garvin Stomp follows. Piledriver is reversed by Perfect, but Garvin rolls through with a sunset flip for two. Hands of Stone gets two. If it was the NWA, Hennig would be DEAD. Hennig tries a high kick, but Garvin catches the leg and turns it into an atomic drop, sending Perfect into the corner for two. He picks him up by the nose and cradles for two. They collide hard for the double KO and Garvin retreats to the apron, but Perfect pounds him from the inside. Garvin fights in and necksnaps him, then goes up with a high cross, rolled through to finish Perfectly at 14:24. Indeed, this was interesting and fun. ***

Leaping Lanny Poffo comes out and reads an AWESOME anti-Hogan, pro-Savage poem, foreshadowing his repackage as the Genius. He gets some great heel heat here, totally catching the crowd off-guard with his tirade.

The Brainbusters v. The Rockers

Aw yeah. Tully evades Shawn and does some strutting to start, but so does Shawn. Tully takes him down with an armdrag and give us another strut, but Shawn armdrags him right back and slugs away in the corner. Tully does a Flair Flip to the floor. Back in, he tries going for Shawn’s leg, but gets nowhere and thus throws a snit back on the floor again. He tries tagging Arn from the floor, but the ref is having none of it and makes them tag legally. So it’s over to Arn, who powers Shawn down and then mocks him for being a pretty boy. He tries working the arm, but Shawn keeps kipping up, so he tries a sunset flip, which Shawn blocks and slugs away. Shawn fires away in the corner, and Arn takes him down with an atomic drop, but Shawn blocks it and it’s BONZO GONZO right away, as the Rockers double-dropkick the Busters out of the ring. Back in, Shawn catches Arn with a rollup for two, and then whips him into the corner, where Marty adds a clothesline, and Shawn gets two from that. They head to the floor and Arn takes a swing, hitting the post instead. Shawn goes back to the arm as a result, and Marty comes in for the first time with a splash on the arm before going to the armbar. Arn reverses, but Marty goes the Owen Hart reversal and elbows him down, back into an armbar again. Nice sequence there. Arn takes him down by the hair, but Marty kips up and prevents the tag, allowing the Rockers to switch off illegally. Then another nice spot, as the Rockers each grab an arm and jump over the top rope while holding it. Arn and Tully have problems organizing their tag, but Tully comes in and promptly misses a blind charge. He injures the shoulder and Marty goes to work on that arm with a hammerlock. Tully takes him down and tries a kneedrop, but Marty catches the leg and takes him down for a figure-four. And Shawn comes in for the old double figure-four spot, as I see we’re just lifting the Horsemen v. RNR formula verbatim. Not a complaint, just an observation. And indeed, Marty goes for a flying headscissors, and Arn grabs him from the apron and clotheslines him on the top rope, just like Ricky Morton used to do.

And so Arn comes in and stomps away on Marty’s head, then uses the Hangman’s Neckbreaker submission for a bit before bringing Tully back in for a forearm off the top. Tully drops Marty on the top rope and Arn uses the tag rope for nefarious purposes, which gets two for Tully. Catapult under the ropes gets two, and Arn comes back in for the slugfest, then catches Marty with his head down and gets two. This leads to the knucklelock sequence that Arn does in every match, but he reverses Marty’s bodyscissors into a catapult, and Tully punches him from the apron for good measure. Tully comes in and fires away with knees, then cuts off a tag attempt and slugs him but good in the corner. Arn comes in with the abdominal stretch and of course they cheat. Marty fights out and makes a crazy charge at Arn, but misses and takes a truly spectacular bump over the top turnbuckle and to the floor. Now there’s a guy who truly gives a crap about his art. Shawn helps him back in and Marty fights his way in with a high cross for two, but Arn brings in Tully and cuts off any potential tag. Marty gets the sunset flip out of the corner for two, but the Brainbusters corral him back into their corner again, thus preventing a tag. Now that’s some great tag wrestling. Arn puts his head down and Marty rams him into the mat, but Arn recovers and tries the gourdbuster, which Marty reverses to a suplex. However, Tully already got the blind tag, and cuts off the tag again, which draws Shawn in. And Arn casually dumps Marty over the top rope behind the ref’s back. Admittedly that spot is less awesome in an area without the top rope DQ, but still, these guys are running like Quartz timepieces here. Marty misses a charge and Tully goes up, but Marty catches him with a shot coming down. Arn cuts him off again, but Marty finally just slugs back and collapses back into the hot tag to a huge pop. Shawn dropkicks everyone and rolls up Tully for two, and it’s breaking loose in Tulsa! Marty rolls up Tully for two in the confusion and then superkicks him while Shawn rams Arn into the post, and the Rockers hit a Rocker Launcher for two…but Arn pulls out the referee to draw a DQ at 22:34. AARRRGH. I was just marking out like nuts for this thing and they went with that crappy finish? This was crazy great, extended Rock N Roll Express formula. Get it and put in on a compilation DVD, man. ****1/2

The Red Rooster v. The Brooklyn Brawler

Brawler attacks to start, but gets dropkicked. Jawbreaker and pump splash get two for the Rooster, and he evades a bulldog attempt. Brawler heads to the floor and walks out, but then changes his mind and comes in again. Darn. Cheapshot allows him to take over, and he adds a slam and stomps away. He chokes him down for two and hits the chinlock, and that goes on forever. Rooster fights up after several attempts, but Brawler clotheslines him to the floor. Sunset flip back in gets two, but Brawler clotheslines him down again. Rollup gets two and Brawler puts him down, but yet another Rooster rollup gets two. Brawler stomps him down again and uses the dreaded rope burn, then catches Rooster with a boot out of the corner. Another Rooster rollup gets two. Brawler uses the Three Stooges eyepoke, but walks into a neckbreaker. Rooster makes the comeback, putting him down with forearms, and a hooking clothesline. Backslide finishes at 12:01. Well after all those cheap rollups you had to figure one of them would work. **

Bad News Brown v. Hercules

Bad News charges and misses, allowing Herc to slug him down. Herc follows with a backdrop, but Brown bails and pulls him out, ramming him into the announce table and adding a shot to the gut with the ringbell. Herc retreats, so Brown hits him with a chair as well. Hercules makes it to the apron, but Brown keeps hitting him in the abs. He throws headbutts in the corner, but Herc fights back and slugs him down. Kneelift puts Brown down again and he adds a clothesline, but they tumble to the floor for the lame-o double countout at 6:02. C’mon, it’s a house show, put someone over. *

The Rougeau Brothers & Dino Bravo v. The Sheepwhackers & Hacksaw Duggan

Now really, shouldn’t Duggan be opposed to proud New Zealanders like the Bushwackers? We get stalling out the wazoo to start, and finally Ray attacks Butch to start us out and gets a rollup for two. Luke breaks it up by biting him on the ass, and the faces clean house. And then it’s stall, stall, stall as we play "switch off to get the right combination" until it’s Duggan v. Bravo. They fight for the shoulderblock and Duggan clotheslines him, sending Bravo to the floor. Jacques comes in and gets sent into the post by the Bushwackers, which has Frenchie complaining about the lack of sportsmanship to waste yet more time. Finally the Rougeaus jump Luke from behind and stomp him down, then we get the Quebec triple-team in the corner. They work Luke over and Bravo clotheslines him for two, then drops knees on the ribs. Bravo with the abdominal stretch and Ray adds the side kick, and then goes to the Boston crab. Luke fights out and makes the hot tag to Duggan, and the three point stance clothesline gets two on Ray. Everyone brawls and Duggan hits Ray with the 2×4 for the pin at 11:40. Yeah, whatever. *

Cage match: Hulk Hogan v. Big Bossman

Hulk attacks and goes for the escape right away, but Bossman beats him down, so Hulk pokes the eyes and fires away. He tries to climb again, but Bossman slams him and then climbs himself, which draws Hulk over for the slugfest on the top rope. Hogan wins that one, but walks into a spinebuster back on the mat and rather than leave Bossman gets a rope from Slick. Bossman chokes away, but Hulk slugs back and rams him into the cage. They do a silly spot where the ref counts both guys down, but Hulk makes a try for the door until Bossman cuts him off. Hulk fights back with a suplex and finds Bossman’s chain, which results in a pretty decent gusher from Bossman. He runs Bossman into consecutive cage walls and then drops the leg, and climbs. Slick comes in to stop, but Hogan crotches Bossman and handcuffs him to the top rope, then beats up poor 100 pound Slick and climbs out to win at 9:00. Not exactly the SNME match for quality or anything, but the crowd was into it like nuts and Bossman had some good color going. **

A fun show overall, and the Rockers-Brainbusters classic makes it a must see. Have I mentioned how awesome this channel is?

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