DON’T QUESTION THE FIRE THAT BURNS INSIDE!
The Douches start the show and attempt to quiet down the crowd. Miz starts by saying that the crowd isn’t used to seeing A-Listers unless they are boarding up windows after a hurricane blows through the city. That’s kinda harsh, dude. Morrison knows the ladies would rather have their bodies then their words. Morrison launches into his self introduction, the Miz calls himself the Grand Mizard of Lust and they both debut their new catch phrase of “Be Jealous”. They ask for someone to please step up. They’re interrupted by Finlay, who has a microphone. Finlay apologizes for stopping the words of wisdom and doesn’t think anyone came here tonight to listen to the Douches run their mouths. Instead, he thinks people came to see people shut their mouths. Morrison throws some insults around about Hornswoggle as Finlay approaches. From behind, Hornswoggle starts to spray the Douches with his Super Soaker, knocking down the tag team champions of the world. The Douches chase Hornswoggle around the ring and Finlay stops them short with the shalaylee, segment over.
Finlay vs. The Miz
We come back and the match is already underway. Finlay has control when we come back. Miz coms back slowly, but Finlay hits him with a boot, an inverted atomic drop, a snap mare, an elbow and a headlock cover for a two. TWO!
Finlay goes to throw the Miz’ head into the corner, but instead Miz reverses it. Finlay goes outside and Miz attempts a baseball slide. Finlay pulls the apron out and throws some haymakers at Finlay. Morrison distracts the ref and the Miz throws a boot to Finlay’s head. Miz gets Finlay in an arm bar and Finlay fights out slowly. Miz hits a single arm DDT and slaps another arm bar on. Finlay fights out again with a hip toss. Miz throws Finlay down for another two. TWO!
Miz throws some boots to a downed Finlay and throws on another arm submission. Finlay fights out, Miz throws him down again. Another arm submission and this time Finlay hits a jawbreaker. Miz goes back to the arm and Finlay has to fight out for what seems like the millionth time. this time it’s a back drop and a few clotheslines and a reverse atomic drop. Finlay sells some pain on a clothesline and he can only get a two. TWO!
Miz rolls Finlay up for a two. Finlay’s thrown to the corner and the Miz hits his jumping clothesline. Finlay goes for the shalaylee, but Morrison pulls it away. Hornswoggle hops on the apron and delivers a running kick to Morrison. The Miz grabs Hornswoggle and tosses him around in the ring. The Miz goes after Hornswoggle, but runs into a Celtic Cross for the three.
Backstage Teddy Long is with Tiffany, but is interrupted by Armando Estrada. Armando wants his job back. HOLY SHIT IT’S CHRIS HARRIS!!! I mean, Braden Walker.
Isn’t it odd how guys without contracts walk around backstage at WWE shows?
Braden Walker over Armando Estrada by top rope body block
Walker starts with a fireman’s carry, follows with a hip toss. Both moves are high impact. Walker’s got a black singlet with white knee and elbow pads. Armando throws a few forearms and charges Walker to the corner. Walker turns it around on Armando and throws some punches to the gut. Walker throws Armando to the corner, Armando comes out and hits a clothesline for a one. Uno! Armando puts a half camel clutch, but Walker fights out quick. Walker runs to the ropes and hits a sunset flip for a two. TWO!
Armando throws some boots and the crowd is dead for this. I wonder if it’s the introduction of an unfamiliar face to them or if it’s Armando stinking up the joint as usual? Armando goes for a bear hug on a guy that’s bigger than he is and Walkerfights out, but has his hair pulled back and thrown to the floor. Armando hits Walker’s spine with his knee and goes for another bear hug. Walker stands up and turns around into a headlock and throws Armando in a suplex. Armando swhips Walker to the corner, misses a splash and is hit by a flying clothesline, inverted atomic drop and big clothesline. Walker hits Armando with a full nelson slam for a two. TWO!
Walker approaches Armando in the corner and is drop toe holded into the turnbuckle. Armando gets Wlker in a standing dragon sleeper but can’t get him over. Walker’s whipped to the corner, goes up top and hits a top rope body block on Armando. The crowd was lukewarm for the debuting Chris Harris/Braden Walker, but they still popped a bit.
Backstage, Tony Atlas is with Teddy Long. Atlas was in town and decided to drop by and Teddy Long is going to announce him later. Back in his day, Atlas benched 650, but Henry scoffs at that feat. Atlas extends a hand but Henry walks away.
Backstage, Lena Yada is with Atlas “Ricky” Ortiz. He’s happy that he won last week and that makes him undefeated. I wish Shelton Benjamin was around to kick this guys face in. We get a MAtt Hardy video package before going backstage once more and Tony Atlas is with Tommy Dreamer and Colin Delaney. Tommy recounts some old stories back when he was starting out when Atlas helped him out before we fade out.
Evan Bourne over Nunzio by Shooting Star Press
ECW has debuted three new guys in less than a month. I really have to say that the creative team really has gone out of their way to make new ECW stars and I appreciate it. Both guys go back and forth with hammerlocks and arm bars, until it breaks down to elbows and kicks. Bourne hits a nice twisting ‘rana and a spinning heel kick for two. TWO!
I mean, what am I really doing trying to do a play by play with a Nunzio match? You know what the conclusion is going to be before the match started. I saw Nunzio in the ring and knew it was going to be a loss for the Little Guido. Bourne has some nice kicks in his arsenal and can hit an extremely fast head scissors seemingly at any time. The crowd starts a “Let’s Go Bourne” chant. Bourne ends it with his very very pretty shooting star press.
Mark Henry pokes some fun at Tony Atlas saying that he’s always just looking for a payday. If he needs a payday, he can carry his bags after the show. that’s a low blow for Tony Atlas. I think we all remember the MTV special however many years ago.
Tony Atlas is introduced as the ring announcer. He botches “World’s Strongest Man” line, but he corrects himself and here comes Mark Henry. Next up, Tommy Dreamer gets his intro as the “heart and soul of ECW”. For a special announcer, Atlas does a pretty good job considering he’s not using and cue cards like most guest announcers do.
Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer goes to a double count out
Dreamer starts with punches, but they do little damage. His rally is cut short with a headbutt, a few forearms and a body block. Henry twists Tommy’s arm on the ground. Tommy fights up and gets knocked back down. Henry hits an elbow on Dreamer and stares down at him. Henry runs tot the ropes and Colin grabs his ankle. Henry pops out of the ring to taunts Colin, but Tony Atlas steps in to stop him and protect Colin, but ATLAS THROWS COLIN INTO THE ANNOUNCE TABLE! Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam outside the ring and I assume this thing ends in a double count out.
Atlas and Henry come into the ring and Atlas announces Henry as the winner. Maybe Henry now has a mouthpiece, which I think is a great idea. We’ll see how this plays out next week.
