I'm Just Sayin'…#20

Pop Quiz: How do you define “Bwah-Ha-Haaaa”?

AMBUSH BUG: YEAR NONE. Couldn’t recommend it enough, brothers n’ sisters! Those of you who already know who Ambush Bug is, I’d just be preaching to the converted. But for the unitiated, know this: Keith Giffen is the undisputed authority on comic absurdity. Get you some of this, comic book heads…

A fellow comedian named Josh Alves wrote me recently, and asked me to check out his entry at ZUDA Comics, called THE ARAKNID KID and I have to say, I liked what I saw…

As described by Josh: Set in the old west, the title character is the hero that triumphs over the villains of Obie City. Using spider-like abilities, quick thinking and unique “Trapeze-Bar Web-Shooters”, our hero manages to find a way around any obstacle that presents itself. Araknid Kid does not “speak” but uses a series of picto-grams (hybrid rebus puzzles) to communicate. It’s like “Comics” meets “Cranium” meets “Saturday Morning Cartoons.”

I can dig it, brother Josh. So those of you with Zuda accounts, give ARAKNID KID a look – and while you’re at it, check out a little Araknid extra on Josh’s personal website right here.

So, is anybody else thinking the same thing as I am?

I STILL don't understand this move...

Spider-Man needed to be single for this...WHY?

What a waste of a great name...

Coming Soon...

…where’d all these villain sex changes come from, all of a sudden? Is there some kind of competition amongst the current Marvel braintrust to see which transgendered supervillain can become the most popular? Your guess is as good as mine folks, but I’ll tell ya – every one of these revamps are going to have their work cut out for them, because at present count…

The Best of the Bunch

…here’s your reigning champion, courtesy of J. Michael Straczynski. Just sayin’, is all…

Now, on to some news from SAN DIEGO COMIC-CON 2008I was following along courtesy of Newsarama.com, and once again, there’s at least one fan at the Marvel panels who want some sort of explanation with regards to our much-maligned, friendly neighborhood wall-crawler. Newsarama had this to report of the moment when the topic of ONE MORE DAY/BRAND NEW DAY came up at the Marvel: Your Universe panel:

The first official “One More Day” complaint of Comic-Con International 2008 (well, in a Marvel panel anyway) was logged – the ol’ “Peter Parker would never make a deal with the devil” line. Buckley stepped in, and said that Mephisto wasn’t the devil, he’s a Marvel supervillain, with no religious connotations.

Quesada also stepped in, noting that it wasn’t actually Peter Parker that made the deal, it was Mary Jane. He explained (again) that he thought “One More Day” was necessary to get Spider-Man where the character needed to be.

The “ol’ Peter would never make a deal with the devil line”? I can almost hear an exasperated sigh coming from the author of the article itself. As if any reader who has a problem with the current Spider-quo should just get over it, already. Well, I’ve just got one thing to say to that: DON’T YOU DARE.

Even if it’s just one of you who raises the issue at each panel at each convention Marvel makes its presence known, I say this to you, convention-goers: don’t let up. All this continues to prove is that Marvel had NO GOOD REASON to do what they did. Until someone at the House of (usually good) Ideas can give a plausible and legitimate argument for using demon-magic to alter a huge portion of Peter Parker’s history that doesn’t sound like a loose aggregate of hems, haws and clumsy-ass deflections, do not let up on them. I’d even encourage you to get a chant going. Shoot, start making banners, and the minute Joe Quesada appears onstage, raise those suckers high: NO GOOD REASON for ONE MORE DAY! NO GOOD REASON for ONE MORE DAY!

*Ahem* okay…I see Manolis shooting me dirty looks, so! Moving right along… 😉

BET unveiled a preview for their upcoming BLACK PANTHER animated series and…you know, when I first heard that John Romita Jr.’s artwork was going to be used for this series, I thought to myself: “well alright, now – that’s gonna work in its favor!” But then I saw the trailer, and…uhm…you know what, you be the judge.

But my favorite bit of news to come out of San Diego this past weekend came from the DC camp. It wasn’t Geoff Johns announcing the upcoming FLASH: REBIRTH I’m sorry Geoff, I know you love’im, but I’m just one of those guys who didn’t care about Barry Allen or Hal Jordan, and was perfectly fine with them remaining these legendary goals for Wally West and Kyle Rayner to aspire towards – nor was it the announcement of Neil Gaiman and Andy Kubert teaming up for a run on BATMAN. No, my absolute favorite announcement? THE MILESTONE CHARACTERS ARE COMING BACK!!!

I could not begin to tell you how much I’ve missed these characters! Dakota City will become another city in the DC Universe, which I’m sure, what with all the recent talk of the interdimensional bleed, that this is going to somehow be facilitated by the events of FINAL CRISIS in some way, but I don’t even care – Heck, I don’t even mind that Static’s gonna look like this:

I’M JUST SO GLAD THEY’RE BACK!!!

But speaking of being finicky about costumes…I’m going to make a recommendation of a comic book miniseries that I’m probably not going to buy – FANTASTIC FOUR – TRUE STORY:

Written by PAUL CORNELL Penciled by HORACIO DOMINGUEZ Cover by NIKO HENRICHON
A threat to the minds of the whole human race sends the FF somewhere they’ve never been before: into the realm of fiction itself! Where Ben finds himself clobbering a demonic army to save the cast of Sense and Sensibility. No, really. And it gets weirder from there. Dante (not the one from Clerks)! Willie Lumpkin! Behold, the Fictocraft! And it’s actually kind of smart and serious too. You’re at least going to flip open the first page in your comic store, right?

I love this concept – it’s an heretofore untapped frontier for the Fantastic Four – even if FUTURAMA got there first – and it has all the potential to be a great read. But I’m probably not going to get it, because of one tiny, stupid little thing. I mean, really – how bad is it of me that I just wish they weren’t wearing the MillarHitched versions of their uniforms?

Such a waste of a fine script...

I mean, fingerless gloves…they’re just so…nineties.

Just sayin’, is all…

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