Project Runway – Episode 5-9 Review

Terri starts us off this week with the celebration of Stella’s departure. (Hush, I miss her New Yawk attitude and leather) Sleepy Suede mumbles to Blayne about his dream where he had to make sweetheart necklines out of chiffon and Pop-Tarts, which the producers have probably now scurried away to develop into a challenge for next season. Kenley’s psyched because the girls have been kicking ass. You know what this means – early confidence earns a trip to the bottom.

The special guests this week are very familiar faces – the eliminated designers from this season of Project Runway! The designers will pair up with an eliminated designer to make an avant-garde look. In the workroom, Tim specifies that the look will be inspired by one of the designers’ astrological sign. Korto (Aquarius) is first and she gets Kelly, who’s a Cancer. Token Straight Guy Joe, an Aries, gets paired with Daniel, a Sagittarius. Libra Leanne gets Scorpio Emily. Blayne, who’s a Libra gets paired with Stellaaaaa, who’s a Scorpio. Terri gets hit with the bad karma stick, whining about how she doesn’t want to work with Keith. Guess who her partner is! (She’s a Sagittarius, Keith’s a Leo). Sagittarius Jerrell gets paired with Jennifer, who’s Taurus. Suede the Sagittarius will be working with Jerry the Libra. Being a Capricorn, I am sad that there are none here – I would love to see someone make an outfit inspired by a psycho goat-fish, lions and water are too damn easy, c’mon!

Blayne’s thrilled that Libra’s colors are ivory, pink, and blue – meaning a neon mess will go down the runway. Korto wants to go with Aquarius and design an outfit that flows like water. Team Suede and Jerry are going with Libra, since they want to move away from an animal look. The design is a blue halter jumpsuit. Terri basically says that Keith is a crappy designer, and doesn’t want him doing much of anything. Keith whines about how he’s “kinda fragile” because he was recently eliminated. Suck it up and get over it. Joe and Wesley are making a poofy, Aries-inspired dress. Kenley says that Aquarius is very strong and progressive. Apparently progressive means shoulders that look like Mickey Mouse’s ears covered in purple plaid. Leanne starts high school drama, saying out loud how Kenley is overconfident and talks too much.

Tim’s confused by Blayne explanation of his design, involving straps and color poofs. Jerrell’s Sagittarius inspired outfit involves a fluid top and a skirt that Tim Gunn says looks like he tried to take “a school marm’s old winter coat and make into a couture dress”. He says the design will wither win or fail miserably. Leanne’s using her trademark loopy shapes to make a Scorpio-like exoskeleton. Kenley’s design is a hectic mish-mosh of prints, which clearly jump the line into costume land. Terri’s making a golden dress with leather, and a big fur collar. Tim says Keith is innovative and they should have good synergy. You could hear a pin drop in the following silence.

A note awaits the designers on Day 2. Surprise! They are now going to be showing their designs at 8pm for a showcase at the Rose Center for Earth and Space at the American Museum of Natural History. Two designers will also be going home this week. Stella doesn’t give a crap about anyone losing, except Blayne. Terri’s being stubborn and refuses to let Keith help out at all, so Keith wanders off to the breakroom to tell Jerrell he “did not design for the Lion King”.

Guests waiting at the planetarium are designers from past seasons – Jay and Rob from Season 1, Daniel and Kara from Season 2, Alison from Season 3, and Carmen and (Fierce!)Christian from Season 4, who will be deciding the winner. Heidi criticizes Kenley’s design, saying her model’s boobs look off. Rob likes the strength of Terri’s Leo design, but Christian thinks the fur collar is too much. You better listen to Christian, or he’ll unleash Ferocha Coutura and spray you in the face with hairspray. Heidi thinks that the main color of Blayne’s outfit reminds her of granny panties. Daniel thinks that Jerrell showed a good use of trim. Once back in Parsons, Terri decides to remove the fur and add red poofy bits, while Keith goes and takes a nap. Kenley stuffs Germaine’s bra to give her boobs. Stella can’t resist hammering some grommets any chance she gets.

Nina finally decides to return to her judging chair, and our guest judge is Francisco Costa. Blayne’s outfit is first, and looks like bondage meets neon explosion. Kenley’s outfit just looks odd and nothing like Aquarius. Terri’s going to get the kiss of death, because her dress looks shiny and cheap. Korto’s dress is flowy and nice, except for the 10 pounds of fabric on the back. Compared to the other work, Joe’s copper dress looks classy. Jerrell’s look is interesting, but I don’t quite know if it says Sagittarius – other than the arrow in the girl’s hair. Leanne’s dress is definitely avant-garde, so she’ll be safe for sure. Suede’s outfit looks too simple. Korto, Jerrell, Leanne, and Joe are safe, and one is potentially the winner.

Nina calls Blayne’s outfit haphazard, and Michael brings out the infamous “pooping fabric” comment, calling it a fashion joke. Kors comments that Terri and Keith being Sagittarius and Leo should have been able to work well together, but both parties roll their eyes. Kors then says the model looks like a “voodoo princess in hell”. Kenley is extremely whiny and defensive, and is told it appears she ignored the challege. Kors says that Suede has self-deluded confidence, and that he didn’t push the envelope.

The Project Runway alumni deem Jerrell’s outfit the best. Leanne, Korto, and Joe are “in”. Whiny Kenley is allowed to leave the runway. In the end, Blayne is the first to be (finally) auf’d, with Terri to follow soon after.

Kiera Vallone hails from Long Island, NY. She is currently a junior-year journalism student at SUNY Purchase.

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