Last month WWE presented a pay-per-view that looked to be the sleeper event of the year, at least on paper, and convinced this former fan to take a look. It was an easy decision since I get all the WWE ppvs for free anyway while serving overseas (I’m in the USAF, stationed in the Republic of Korea). Unforgiven didn’t exactly live up to my expectations, but it did have a few things I enjoyed, and without watching any of the weekly episodes between the two ppvs, I decided to check out the follow-up last weekend.
TODAY’S ISSUE: A look at WWE No Mercy.
There are few better ways to open a WWE show for this MF’er than by bringing out Matt Hardy for a heavyweight singles title match, so they got off to a good start. Defending the ECW title against a 400-pound behemoth was a tall order for the Sensei of Mattitude, but Hardy was up to the task. When properly executed, the story of an athletic underdog versus a much larger monster is a pro wrestling classic. In fact, Shawn Michaels’ WWF title run in 1997 was practically defined by that dynamic. The champ’s attempts to endure punishment while hitting and running had me on the edge of my seat, and as an admitted Matt Hardy mark, I was hoping his title run wouldn’t be so short-lived that he would just drop the strap right back to Henry in the opening contest. Matt’s sudden delivery of the Twist of Fate for the win was reminiscent of DDP’s Diamond Cutter for the element of surprise, and caused me to pop. Considering this match’s inherent limitations (Mark Henry was in it), Hardy managed to make it an exciting opener, and No Mercy was off and running.
Following such an entertaining opener with a WWE Women’s Title match was kind of a downer, but I must admit that even while Candice Michelle’s offense is painfully slow and unexplosive, she did string together successions of moves that actually made sense in this contest, as if she was trying to work a real match. So while it looked like pro wrestling played back at less than full speed, at least it did resemble a match, which these “Divas†outtings rarely do. In addition to attempting to retell the same David and Goliath story Hardy and Henry did in the previous title match, they also maintained the subtle, growing tension between Marella and Phoenix when Santino pulled Phoenix out of the ring while Candice had her covered. Although Marella was only trying to help, Phoenix isn’t that type of champion, and she didn’t want any assistance. At some point their volatile relationship will cost Marella his Intercontinental Championship, likely a few weeks shy of him overtaking the Honky Tonk Man for longest IC title reign. Overall this wasn’t as horrible as I was expecting, surprised as I am to have just typed those words. Clearly Candice is trying, so you have to give her a few points for the effort.
Next up was perhaps the final battle in the uninspiring war between Kane and Rey Mysterio. The first three matches on the card told the big man/little man story; interesting, if unoriginal. That must have been the flavor of the month in meetings of the Creative Department. Mysterio has perfected this story, and there are few in the history of the business better at fighting from underneath. Of course Rey did a fantastic job of hanging on, absorbing damage from the Big Red Machine, and inflicting punishment when he could. Mysterio frustrated the supposedly ‘conflicted’ monster enough that Kane had to use a chair and get himself DQ’d, saving Rey’s mask, which was put on the line as a last-minute attempt to draw with this match that nobody was too excited to see. Watching the same basic match layout three times in a row was less than entertaining, but Rey dragged a quasi-watchable performance out of Kane, so high points to the luchador there.
*SIDE NOTE: Other than it being a phrase that Jim Ross used a while ago to describe Kane’s mental instability, I’m not sure what Michael Cole thinks Kane is conflicted about. I sensed no conflict in him whatsoever in his quest to batter, humiliate, and unmask Rey Mysterio. Perhaps they should come up with a new buzzword for Kane, like ‘maniacal’ or ‘dangerous’.
Then came a long sportz entertainment segment featuring a total of seven “superstarsâ€. MVP opened with a very good statement about being the one guy Vickie Guerrero should never leave on the bench, but Randy Orton made an appearance to explain that he truly is everything MVP claims to be, and the interplay between the two was starting to heat up when Rhodes, DiBiase, and Manu joined the fray. I have to admit, the slow burn on the relationship between these four princes of wrestling is actually far better than I expected. Normally WWE would tear through an angle like this in two weeks, but they’re still developing it slowly and steadily.
It was fun watching the braggadocios, loud-mouthed MVP get a comeuppance, and CM Punk’s chicanery was the highlight of the exchange, tricking MVP into taking a beat-down at the hands of the New Horsemen. This segment set up or continued a lot of future issues between different wrestlers, including Punk and Kofi versus MVP, the New Horsemen versus MVP, Punk and Kofi versus the New Horsemen, Randy Orton versus MVP, Randy Orton versus Punk and Kofi, and whatever’s going on between the New Horsemen and Orton. I hope Creative can keep track of all of it. This was a fun segment that fit nicely into the pay-per-view.
Just when WWE hit a high note, they instantly brought things back down and out came JBL to face Batista for the #1 contendership to the RAW world title. Make no mistake, I understand and appreciate the contributions John Layfield has made to the business, but when he retired and moved to the announce desk (where he performed exceptionally well) he should have remained there. His coming out of retirement has been one long, bad idea. He just doesn’t have it anymore between the ropes.
Batista has a great look, a cool attitude, and a large fan following, but once he steps into the ring he’s fairly useless. Thankfully this match was relatively short, and Batista’s victory was no surprise. He’s got history with both HBK and Y2J, so no matter who was to win the main event later in this show, Batista makes a good #1 contender. As soon as he was done stinking up the ring and grabbed a mic, JBL was golden once again. Please, Mr. Layfield. Just go back to the booth! I won’t bother commenting on the stupid Cryme Tyme segment that wrapped up the JBL promo. Next.
I can’t imagine who in Creative believes hooking up Big Show and Undertaker yet again is a good idea. The two slow, older, lumbering strikers together make for boring television. It was during the Show/’Taker match that I really appreciated the fact that I hadn’t paid money to see this ppv. Big Show’s attempt at a side Russian leg-sweep was ludicrous, and he ought to at least stick with his new “most dangerous right hand in the WWE†gimmick and leave the wrestling to those who can properly execute wrestling throws and holds while making them look something akin to offensive maneuvers. Tazz’s description of this match as “non stop action†was equally ridiculous.
The knockout/ref stoppage finish is an unusual one for WWE and was a nice twist, but unfortunately not nice enough to salvage the match. At this point, both Show and Undertaker should be paired with younger guys who can make their names by giving a good accounting of themselves against established veterans. Show and ‘Taker facing each other just maintains the status quo and does nothing for the future of WWE.
Up next was Triple H defending the WWE championship against perennial also-ran and self-destruction expert Jeff Hardy. Between the video package and JR’s hype, they actually made this title defense seem important. Kudos to WWE for that, since we all knew going in that Hardy had no chance of dethroning the Game, but they at least made me want to watch. Early on, Hardy’s strategy of wrestling and using takedowns and headlocks was quite surprising, and it reminded me of Joe/Punk I and II in ROH for just a moment. But that’s where THOSE comparisons end. Hardy tuned the match around and handed control back to the Game by taking an unnecessary risk, landing flat on his back on the floor after attempting a plancha. It’s frustrating to see him keep taking the obviously unnecessary risk match after match at this point in his career. Wouldn’t a guy with his immense experience have learned anything by now?
After an interesting start and a shot at being something different, this match degenerated right back into a common SmackDown affair. Some expert pro wrestling analysts might call this “perfectly acceptable wrestlingâ€, and it was by WWE television standards. It would have been pretty good for a TV match, in fact. However this is ppv, and you should expect a little bit more than “acceptable†when you pay $40 for a wrestling show. But it was nice to see Triple H win with a wrestling counter instead of the Pedigree for the 9,712th time.
The main event was another chapter in the epic saga between world heavyweight champion Chris Jericho and living legend Shawn Michaels in the infamous, ever dangerous ladder match. Jericho is quite accomplished in the role of the wicked heel champion, and Michaels is still fighting for retribution and to vanquish his hated foe. You knew going in that this was going to be good, so it was simply a matter of how good, and what crazy spots would these two innovators invent to add to the long history of ladder matches in WWE lore. With evil on his mind, Jericho came up with a couple of vicious new uses for the climbing apparatus to inflict pain and suffering on HBK, as he still believes he is in the shadow of Shawn Michaels.
It was an exciting battle, culminating in Lance Cade’s interference saving Jericho’s title, and the never before seen see-saw battle at the top of the ladder with both HBK and Y2J hanging onto opposite sides of the title belt before Jericho squeaked out the victory. THIS was a championship match worthy of main-eventing a pay-per-view.
As a whole, No Mercy was all over the map. A couple of decent matches, two crappy matches, and one very good ladder match resulted in a card that was less than all WWE can be. It almost feels as if they’re holding back, intentionally keeping certain shows at a level lower than their more famous counterparts like WrestleMania, SummerSlam, Royal Rumble and Survivor Series, but there’s no reason for that. Why wouldn’t WWE want to produce 12 excellent pay-per-views a year? Clearly they have the performers, storytelling ability, and production quality to recapture lost glory. I wonder if they’ll ever put it all together again and revisit the halcyon days of 8-10 years ago. If not, these hit-or-miss shows are about as good as WWE fans can hope for.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled reality.
p.s. – “Fire, water, and government know nothing of mercy.†– Albanian proverb
