Celebrity Championship Wrestling TV Report (Week 2)

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Week 1

Hulk Hogan’s Celebrity Championship Wrestling
Week 2: Talkin’ Trash Sports

We begin with the remaining nine celebrities in the lounge.  They are sharing their “collective pain and ailments” with each others.  It breaks down to trash talking each other and it seems that the egos have begun to build among the celebrities.  Enter the judges and they stop the ego building.  Danny makes Erin cry and she tries to sell it and fails.  It’s time to get serious and to see how fearless everyone is.  We go to the warehouse.

“It’s Gut Check Time”

We’re in the warehouse and our celebrities are going to suicide dive about thirty feet in the air.  One by one, they jump.  Trishelle hesitates a bit, thinking she’ll hit the pavement.

After a break, Trishelle finally takes the plunge.  Everyone else on Team Beefcake finish the plunge and it’s Team Nasty’s turn.  Everyone plunges except Frank Stallone.  That’s why he’s the “other Stallone”.  Stallone’s wondering where his stuntman is at.  The jokes on Stallone right now.

Eric Bischoff discusses the exercise and finds out if anyone learned anything.  Bischoff talks about Stallone not taking the jumped.  Frank says that he didn’t come here to be a trapeze artist.  They get three more moves: Headlock takedown, School boy, and Shoulder tackle.

The Locker Rooms

Beefcake says that Danny is “mysteriously missing from the equation” due to his radio show gig.  The rest of the team are worried.

The Training Exercises

After a break, we get to watch the celebs learn the moves.  Erin is worried about hurting her neck.  In the other gym, we learn the school boy.  Everyone is worried about grabbing the crotch.  After the moves being taught, it’s time to determine the faces and heels.  Butterbean takes a farting lesson and Beefcake is choking to death in the ring.  Needless to say, that session is over.  Nasty wanted to train Dennis Rodman a top rope move and Dennis lands on his shoulder hard.  He’s out to see the doctor.

Once the fart smell was aired out, Danny Bonaduce returns to the action and he quickly learns the moves.  In the other room, Dennis Rodman sprained his rotator cuff so he’s moved to manager.  Frank has to rise to the occasion.

Before the main event, Hogan shows up and gives a pep talk to the celebs

The Main Event

It’s time for some wrestling!  Bubba the Love Sponge is on commentary!  The ring announcer welcomes the legends and judges to their position.

Trishelle Cannatella & Danny Bonaduce v. Todd Bridges & Butterbean
Team Beefcake

Butterbean and Bonaduce start things off and Bonaduce runs into a couple tackles.  Bonaduce begs off and he tags in Trishelle.  SHe gets in his face and he says that he won’t fight her.  She jumps on Butterbean’s back and he squashes her in the corner.  Bridges comes in as does Bonaduce.  Bridges eats a boot and Bonaduce takes control.  Bridges heats Bonaduce’s head to the corner and he hits the headlock takedown.  Bonaduce counters to a headscissors.  Hogan comments that he needs to slow down.  Trishelle sneaks in and tries a double axe handle, but Bridges is too smart and she seeks Bonaduce.  They botch the shoulder tackle move, but Bonaduce assumes control at the corner.  Butterbean tries to get invoved.  Trishelle comes in and misses a corner charge and in comes Butterbean.  Bonaduce still can’t take Butterbean down.  Trishelle comes in and she kicks Butterbean into a Bonaduce school boy for the win.

Winners: Danny Bonaduce & Trishelle Cannatella

Post match, Butterbean tosses Bonaduce out like yesterday’s garbage.

Erin Murphy & Dustin Diamond v. Nikki Ziering & Frank Stallone (w/ Dennis Rodman)
Team Nasty

Nikki takes and she kicks Diamond.  We go pillar to post and she beats Diamond’s head off ten times.  School boy attempt gets two for Nikki.  Nikki hits the headlock takedown and it comes Stallone.  Knifeedge chop connects and Stallone gets two with a school boy of his own.  The headlock is coutered and Diamond sends Stallone outside.  Rodman inserts himself to the match while Stallone gets taken care off.  Diamond says it’s done, but Stallone moves out of the way.  Nikki shakes her ass a bit before getting the tag.  The ladies are in and Nikki kicks Erin down.  Erin gets sent pillar to post and Diamond gets taken care of.  The men are back in and Stallone hits a clothesline for two.  Rodman intervenes again and that helps Erin Murphy when she drops an elbow on Stallone’s back and Diamond gets the pity three count.

Winners: Erin Murphy & Dustin Diamond

Post match, Dennis Rodman threatens the referee and Dustin takes care of him.

I wasn’t able to follow Team Nasty’s match that well because Rodman seemed not to know that his role as manager cost his team the win.  Team Beefcake did more with their match and Danny Bonaduce is a star in his own right.  I’m almost certain the final four will contain Bonaduce and possibly Rodman, but it’s only week 2.  Team Beefcake was better overall this week.

We’re back and Hogan congratulates the teams.  He deems Team Beefcake the safe team this week.  They change the formula up a bit as Bischoff calls up Nikki.  She has a lot going on in the looks department, but this is more about looks.  Jimmy Hart likes Dustin’s heel persona right now.  They are safe tonight.  Hogan calls out Stallone and he says that he rose to the occasion and the match went good.  Erin didn’t improve this week, but she cruised through the match.  Dennis Rodman gets chewed out for the injury.  This isn’t the NBA.  He did a great job as manager tonight.  Of the three people there, Hogan didn’t see the Eye of the Tiger, so Stallone’s history.

Stallone says that he’s 58 years old and he’s done as good as he could with people 20 years younger than him.  Next week, the celebrities have to create their own in-ring image.  That will be entertaining.  See you next week for CCW!

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