The SmarK 24/7 Rant for Monday Night RAW – October 20 1997
Just want to say thanks to everyone who’s bought the new book thus far, as it’s currently sitting in the top 10 wrestling books on Amazon and has been getting great feedback. I really think it’s my best one so far, although I do want to address one point that a few people have e-mailed about after reading it. In the book, I say that I can separate the man from the performer and continue to enjoy his matches, while on the blog a few days back I said pretty much the opposite. Well, the short answer is that the book was written more than a year ago, when I thought I could cope and move past it. As it turned out, I couldn’t, and I still can’t watch his matches.
But hey, judge for yourself and pick up the book in a bookstore near you or check out the helpful Amazon link below.
– Live from Oklahoma City, OK.
– Your hosts are Vince McMahon, Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler.
Rocky Maivia & Kama Mustafa v. Ahmed Johnson & Ken Shamrock
The LOD is at ringside for this, leading up to Survivor Series, duh. Shamrock punches himself in the face on the way into the ring, although luckily he doesn’t cut himself open and force Seth Petruzelli to take his place. We get a quick eight-man brawl before the match starts proper with Rocky (who quite definitively sucks according to the crowd) and Ahmed. But never mind the match, the reason to watch this is D-X sitting up by the Titantron and commenting on the match with signage (“I’d Rather Be In Chyna”, “Who Booked This Crap?”, “Uncle Tom 3:16” are the winners here). Back to the match, if we must, as Shamrock gets a belly to belly on Kama and hits Rocky with his leg lariat to clear the ring. Back in, Kama puts Shamrock down with a back kick and stomps away, and Rocky gets a proto-People’s Elbow for two. Shamrock recovers with a rana, but Rocky goes low and brings in Kama for some “MMA” offense, like a headbutt and clothesline. Shamrock fires back on Rocky with a belly to belly and goes for the ankle, but Rock makes the ropes. Kama drops elbows and Rock tries another Elbow, but it misses and Shamrock manages to fuck up an elbowdrop, as he and Kama mistime an interference spot and Shamrock has to drop an elbow against his will. Then he gets up and does it again, and this time Kama trips him up as planned and Rock hits him with Rude’s briefcase for the pin at 6:36. The match is meaningless, but D-X acting like frat boys is the kind of anarchic brilliance that WCW couldn’t pull off any longer by that point. *1/2
Meanwhile, Michael Cole breaks the hot story about the Nation’s dressing room having been vandalized by some sort of rogue Canadian force. Who knew Bret Hart was such a racist? This immediately leads to Faarooq and the Nation storming out to cut an angry promo about racism in the WWF and he wants a match NOW. This is where the ECW influence via Russo really starts showing up, as things are never as scheduled.
Bret Hart v. Faarooq
Faarooq attacks to start and pounds Bret down, but again D-X joins us as he gets a sleeper. Bret comes back and slugs away, but he goes after Shawn and we get a big brawl on the floor between the Harts and the Nation as we take a break. Back with Faarooq going up and getting slugged down by Bret, and Bret goes to work on the leg. It’s another brawl on the floor, but Steve Austin runs in and stuns Faarooq, and the clueless Bret pins him at 5:08. Man, they were just making Bret look like a chump all over the place. Barely even a match. 1/2*
Meanwhile, it’s Kevin Kelly with the Karate Fighters 1997 tournament: Preview Edition. I can’t even make this shit up.
Jeff Jarrett, fresh from jobbing out on Nitro, jumps ship and is ready to bore a whole new audience. He complains about his treatment in WCW and then complains about his treatment last time he was in the WWF (he was booked against a clown, a drug addict, and a black man who can’t even speak the English language, apparently) and the “Double J” gimmick was stupid. Ironic considering that after months of failed reinvention he’d be right back to Double J again. Jarrett says that he’s shooting, which means he’s not, and the interview drags on for another couple of minutes before he leaves. X-Pac making his big return to the WWF, this was not.
Brian Christopher v. Marc Mero
Kind of weird seeing Mero in his boxer gimmick working as a babyface. Mero grabs the headlock to start and takes Christopher down with a drop toehold. Meanwhile, Jerry leaves the broadcast position to convince Sable to model a Steve Austin baseball cap, which gets Mero all distracted and he stops to rip it off her. Ah, there’s the heel turn. Christopher jumps him from behind and hits the Stroke, but misses a blind charge. Mero slugs him down and drops him with a faceplant and a kneelift, but now Lawler gets involved again. Mero goes low on Christopher and the TKO finishes at 4:06. *
Intercontinental v. European title: Owen Hart v. Shawn Michaels
Owen slugs Shawn down off a criss-cross and follows with the leg lariat, then clotheslines him to the floor. He follows with a pescado, but misses and hits the railing, and Shawn sends him into the stairs as well. And we take a break. Back with Owen nailing Shawn off the top and pounding away in the corner and getting a sweet belly to belly for two. He follows with a sleeper, but Shawn escapes with a backdrop suplex and pounds away on the mat. The camera work there was unfortunate as it completely exposed the punches. Shawn whips him into the corner for two and hits the chinlock, but Owen comes back with a catapult for two. Owen misses a blind charge and hits the post, allowing Shawn to go up with the flying elbow, but the superkick misses and Owen gets the ENZUIGIRI OF DEATH. And cue Steve Austin for the run-in, as the crowd comes unglued and Shawn superkicks Owen. Bret runs out to save his brother and it’s a Sportz Entertainment Finish at 6:00 or so. Reasonably hot match while it lasted, but anyone who expected an actual finish is nuts. **
Undertaker joins us from a mysterious studio and has ominous words for his brother.
Dude Love v. British Bulldog
Nope, it’s a bait-and-Kane, as the arena goes red after Dude’s entrance and Kane comes out for bad intentions. Dude holds him off well enough with a chair to the head, but Kane chokeslams him on the ramp.
The Headbangers v. The Road Dogg & Bad Ass Billy Gunn
Road Dogg notes on the way to the ring that if you didn’t know, you’d better call somebody. Hey, I think this team might catch on! Vince noting that “pelvic thrusts seem to be all the rage lately” in a disgusted voice is pretty funny for some reason. Gunn beats Mosh down to start and Dogg gets a clothesline off a cheapshot. Gunn whips him into the corner, but misses the blind charge and it’s hot tag Thrasher. He whips Mosh into both heels and hits Gunn with a clothesline off the middle rope to send him out. The Bangers double-team Dogg with a flapjack, but Billy smashes a boombox on Thrasher’s head and Road Dogg gets the pin at 3:57. And so the glorious history of the New Age Outlaws begins. They must have REALLY wanted to push them because given the anemic crowd reaction, they’d never have lasted past a tryout these days, let alone winning the tag belts from the LOD like they did soon after this. *
Taka Michinoku v. Tajiri
The crack guys in the truck spell it “Tijiri”. Tajiri gets a handspring elbow to put Taka on the floor right away, and he follows with a huge quebrada. Back in, Taka hits him with a top rope leg lariat and follows with a dropkick to put Tajiri out, and then follows with a dive off the top. Back in, he gets a seated dropkick and goes up, but misses a moonsault and Tajiri kills him with a powerbomb for two. Rana gets two. AWESOME high kick in the corner, but Taka fires back with a missile dropkick. Tajiri counters the Michinoku Driver into a german suplex for two, but Taka counters a powerbomb with a rana for two and finishes with the Driver at 2:49. See, now THIS is what the fans wanted from the division. Download this off YouTube if you can find it. ***1/2
Jim Cornette continues his war with Phil Mushnick and reads letters from wrestling fans. Kind of a pointless segment.
The Godwinns v. DOA
No match, as it turns into a big brawl with the Truth Commission and we’re out following a word from Mankind, who is going back to his roots to deal with Kane. Spoiler: He loses anyway. Worst Main Event Ever.
Kind of a skippable week, but all the buildup to Survivor Series is fascinating stuff from a historic standpoint, even as the quality of the wrestling was falling fast.
