Let’s catch everyone up to speed with everyone’s favorite wrestling-related reality TV show! I’ll apologize in advance, but since I’ve been terribly busy, I’ll bullet point my way through the show and recap the matches. Enjoy!
Celebrity Championship Wrestling Review Spot
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Week 5: Train With the Pros
Training
- Danny Bonaduce isn’t here to start the show and Dustin is pissed off.
- The coaches come in and Trishelle talks about her pink bra.
- Eric Bischoff chats with the celebs and Rodman takes a dig at Trishelle.
- The teams merge together and the main event will be a battle royal.
- Moves for the week: Over the top, Duck & Boost, & a Finishing Move.
- They discuss the dangerous aspect of the Battle Royal.
- For now, they won’t go from the ring to the floor. Butterbean has the most difficulty.
- Dustin feigns being hurt for sympathy reasons.
- Rodman tosses Sammy out of the ring and he gets hurt.
- They pair into teams and they throw everyone over. Dustin takes a powder and a visit with the medic for his shoulder.
- Danny FINALLY shows up.
- Hogan shows up with Rob Van Dam.
- They discuss the signature move a bit.
- RVD does a frog splash
- Danny Bonaduce takes the first shot, but forgets how to take the bump. He’s hurt bad.
- Danny goes on a ride to the hospital.
- They now train their finishing moves with RVD.
- Dustin Diamond goes the Jake Roberts route with the DDT as his finisher.
- Before the main event, Danny may not show up. The show must go on, though.
- They discuss the actual match and put it together.
The Main Event
Five Man Battle Royal
Participants: Red Hot Redneck, the Winner, Mr. Not-So-Perfect, Mean Bean, & Rodzilla
It looks like two people will start and one comes in after a predetermined interval. It’s Diamond and Bridges to start off. Diamond takes it to Bridges and gets good heat in the process. He drops the Trombone Elbow. Diamond tosses Bridges over, but he avoids elimination and he takes over. Handspring forearm smash connects by Bridges and Trishelle enters the fray. She teams with Bridges and they double team Diamond a bit. Trishelle dances over Diamond and Rodman comes in and he dispatches Trishelle and Bridges. Trishelle hits a double axe handle, but that does not phase Rodman. Butterbean comes in and he squashes everyone in the corner. Bridges drops on Diamond’s groin. Bridges avoids elimination and Rodman makes a big mistake. They all team up against Butterbean and four people can’t beat him. Now they try to toss him over and are successful. They pair off and Diamond wants Rodman to shake hands, but Rodman says no. Bridges is up top and he hits a Sunset Flip to pin Diamond. Bridges can’t send Rodman over, but Rodman gets Bridges over. Ever the opportunist, Trishelle takes both men out and she wins!
Winner: Red Hot Redneck
Hogan gives everyone props for the match tonight. He notes that it was a tough week this week, but no one is safe. She showed no fear against Rodman. Diamond gets the same reaction as Bischoff…HAHA! Diamond hasn’t improved this week. Jimmy Hart picks on Butterbean’s floor bump. With that said, because Danny Bonaduce was hurt, he is this week’s jabroni!
Week 6: In-Ring Psychology & Time to Go Hardcore!
- Dennis and Trishelle are talking trash at each other.
- Brutus changes his hair color. Danny Bonaduce isn’t as hurt as first thought.
- Dustin and Todd get in an argument with a lot of explicit language.
- They take a field trip and arrive at a junkyard. Eric Bischoff greets everyone.
- Time for them to learn how to get hardcore!
- Everyone goes grocery shopping with weapons galore.
- They take their anger out on a junked car.
- Danny Bonaduce makes an announced return! He did not get the memo that he was eliminated.
- Danny leaves to go find Hogan. Dustin gets pissed off.
- Hulk Hogan explains to Danny that he was indeed eliminated.
- Dustin Diamond interrupts and he gets personal and both Diamond and Bonaduce get in each other’s faces.
- Hogan gets tired of the childish games and he books Dustin v. Danny in a Falls Count Anywhere Match. Who is the better man?
- Moves for the week: Hit in the back, Hit in the head, & Hit in the gut. They train the hardcore way and Trishelle takes a powder.
- She returns and is still hesitant.
- Beefcake trains Dustin and Danny for their special attraction match.
- Meanwhile, Trishelle doesn’t want to do much today. Nasty throws the towel in the ring and lets them deal with it.
- It breaks down when Diamond hits Bonaduce in the head and Danny loses his temper.
- Hogan comes in and offers encouragement to the others and introduces Bill Goldberg to the celebs.
- They show Goldberg the moves. However, Goldberg wants Danny to hit him in the head with the trash can. Danny does a piss poor job the first time. The second time, Goldberg isn’t impressed. Butterbean slaps Danny and the third time, he takes him off his feet. Goldberg decides to give Danny a Jackhammer.
The Main Event
Hardcore Tag Team Tornado Match
Mean Bean & Mr. Not So Perfect v. Red Hot Redneck & Rodzilla
Bean and Bridges attack Rodman and Trishelle. Trishelle is out for now and it is 2-on-1 for Rodman as Bean and Bridges are beating him to a pulp. Bridges takes a chair and misses Rodman, allowing Rodman and Trishelle to dish the pain. Bridges gets tossed outside and Trishelle takes it to Bean, no pun intended. Rodman brings a ladder into the ring and Bean hits the ladder hard. Bridges gets sent to the ladder too. Rodman sends Trishelle towards Rodman, but he moves and she eats ladder. Bean hits Rodman with a chair and Bridges drops the elbow. Big splash by Bean and Rodman is tied to the ropes. They ram the ladder against Rodman’s chest. Briges hits Trishelle in the ass with the trash can lid and Rodman eats trash can hard. Trishelle frees Rodman and they take Bridges and Bean down. The frying pan is introduced and SHE HITS BEAN IN THE FACE WITH IT! They’re cooking the Bean! Rodman brings a table into the ring. Rodman drops a cookie sheet on Bridges. Trishelle looks to go through the table, but Rodman saves her and sends Bean through. Top rope cookie sheet shot sends Bean down for three.
Winners: Red Hot Redneck & Rodzilla
Falls Count Anywhere Grudge Match
The Winner v. “Dangerous” Danny Bonaduce
Diamond starts off with a quick attack on Bonaduce. He chokes him and sends him to the corner. A quick cover gets two. Danny gets introduced to another corner, but Danny comes back with a few beats to the turnbuckle. We go pillar to post and back, Danny gets two following a forearm smash. The fight spills to the outside and Danny bashes Diamond’s head on the apron. Diamond sends Danny to the steel stairs and chokes him out with a cord. They go to the locker room. Diamond goes for a cover, but Bridges gets involved. He’s restrained and Danny takes control, hitting Diamond with a trash can. Diamond gets sent through a door for two! Bonaduce goes to send Diamond through the wall, but Diamond sends HIM through the wall! Danny busts through a man possessed. Bonaduce meets the lockers before Diamond takes the action back into the ring. Diamond is in the ring with the cookie sheet and he bashes Bonaduce over the head. Diamond hits the Hustle Elbow and misses and Danny has the cookie sheet. He bashes Dustin a bit and only gets two. Bonaduce goes up top and he misses the cross body! Diamond brings a real steel chair into the ring. DDT to Danny on the chair and that’s all! Easily the match of the season so far!
Winner: The Winner
Diamond stomps Danny’s heart to add insult to injury.
Time to pay the piper. Butterbean’s attitude is getting better, but he’s selling too much. Todd Bridges has a good attitude. Dennis Rodman didn’t rush everything tonight and it looked so real. They are safe tonight. Trishelle was faking injury and was hurt at the same time. Dustin whooped ass tonight. Danny says that he did his best tonight. Hulk asks Trishelle if she gave it 100%. She didn’t answer the question. She then says that she didn’t give it 100%. Because of this, she’s gone!
Next week: the men get separated from the boys!
Catch you all later this week!
